Mine
by FarmerBill
Summary: Alexandra Faye has a lot to prove. Jacob Black has his hands full. Settle Down sequel. This is a very slow SLOWBURN!
1. Prologue: The Fall

_When people said that it was raining all the time, I see sunshine 'cause I know that you are mine… _

\- **Mine, The 1975**

* * *

Disclaimer: I own nothing recognisable.

**PROLOGUE: The Fall**

* * *

_Maybe it was a little dramatic, to say that, yeah, I had thought about how I would die._

_When I thought about it – and I don't want to say imagined it, like I'd been hoping for it – I'd always thought that I'd die because of some stupid mistake I would make. Any which way I considered it – I always thought that it would come down to something I had accidentally done. Cross the road without looking, drink one too many, piss off the wrong person – hell maybe I'd even accidentally poison myself. _

_I guess, in a way, you could say that I had chosen this. That it was a choice I had made. Even though I was doing it for someone else, out of some dumb nobility that was fading as fast as the water was rushing to meet us, I could consider it a good deed. I guess. You either kill yourself or get killed. What are you gonna do?_

_Though, jumping off a cliff after a crazy person hadn't exactly ever crossed my mind as how it would end. _


	2. Mine: Chapter 1

Moving to the suckiest, rainiest, most boring state in America hadn't been all bad.

Alex Faye knew she was lying to herself.

It had been pretty _shit_.

She had left behind friends, fun and something resembling a good life behind in Colorado. Being uprooted in the middle of the year with no warning hadn't exactly put her in the right mindset for a whole new life. She was a bitch to her parents about it, she could freely admit – though it made her feel guilty afterwards. And her older siblings, flawless Topher and beatific Kitty, had been – of course – perfect angels about the whole thing. Of course, for them, getting away from all the shit they copped at their old school was probably… for the best. That, at least, she could understand – even if they still thought she had no idea about the whole thing.

Like the bruises that appeared on Topher were 'accidental,' and the nights Kitty spent crying were just 'hormones.'

She wasn't an idiot. But they still treated her like one.

The only bright spot in this sunless, grey town, were her boys.

Yes, _hers,_ possessive pronoun intended. She would guard the precious friendship she held with the only cool people in this town with her life. Though that _precious_ _friendship _was waning every minute she spent in the rain, waiting for said boys to come pick her up from school.

Scowling, she narrowed her eyes at her phone, which had died in her last period. She shot a contemplative look to the trees across the road from the school – wondering what the likeliness was of her being able to get one of the Pack's attention to take her home. Paul, Sam and Jared can't _all_ have been busy after all…

Her sister dating a werewolf hadn't hit very high on her list of things to care about – once she'd gotten over the whole furry creature thing, she had accepted it. Paul was cool, and he had bought her alcohol and hadn't told Kitty, and he'd promised to teach her how to drive soon. And there was that whole '_our love is destiny_' thing that Kitty had mentioned once, so she wasn't too worried about any future heartbreak either.

Her mind made up, she took a step out onto the road.

The squealing of tires and breaks made her yelp, the car that had been speeding towards her, coming to a stop mere inches away from her. She raised her eyes slowly to the windshield. Quil Ateara V was staring at her, hands white knuckled on the steering wheel, Embry Call's mouth was open in the passenger's seat – and from the back, like some sort of disembodied spirit, Jacob Black's usually tanned face was white.

Alex's shock faded very quickly into anger, and she raised a fist at them. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING? WHY WERE YOU GOING SO FAST? YOU COULD HAVE KILLED ME!"

Embry made a hopeless gesture, pointing to his ears and mouthing; "_we can't hear you." _

Alex gave a shrill shriek of frustration, before turning to stomp towards the car. Thankfully, Jacob opened it for her, scooting aside so she could get in. She opened her mouth to continue yelling, but Quil turned around. "Before you say anything – I just want to know why you were walking out into the road without looking in the first place."

Alex narrowed her eyes at him. Jacob touched her shoulder gently. "Do you want to talk about anything? Are you feeling sad, Alex?" his voice was faux concerned.

Alex snapped at him, baring her teeth, and slapping his hand away. "Fuck off. Don't joke about depression, asshole – and if you _must_ know I was going to the forest." She said primly, buckling her belt with a decisive click. Embry turned to look at her then, raising an eyebrow.

"Why were you going to the forest?" he asked, genuinely confused. Quil pulled out into traffic, glaring at a car that tried to cut them off.

She smiled at the sweet boy, and almost answered outright – before realising what she was about to do. Sam hadn't stressed anything as hard as he had stressed keeping the Pack secrets… well, _secret_. So, she settled with shooting him a wink, making him flush slightly. "Wouldn't you like to know, pretty-boy?"

Jacob gave a whine of complaint as Embry turned back around, flustered. "How come he's 'pretty-boy,' and I'm 'asshole.'"

"Cause you're an asshole, Jake." Quil said bluntly. Alex cackled at the betrayed look on Jacob's pouting face, Embry joining in a second later.

_Another close shave. _

Alex was open about almost everything with the other three. Having such a heavy secret was tiring, especially considering it wasn't even hers – and it seemed to be getting harder and harder to keep it from them.

"You having dinner with us?" Jacob asked, as Quil turned onto the main road.

Alex shook her head apologetically. "Nah sorry, I got dinner with… the family." She said hesitantly. It wasn't _technically_ a lie. Emily had assured her time after time, that she _was _family. Kitty was Pack, which meant so was she.

"Man, you're always eating dinner with your family." Quil complained, but flicked his indicator on to turn into her street anyway.

Alex stuck her tongue out at him. "I'm not really." Jacob frowned at her as they pulled up outside her house. "I just don't wanna hang out with you losers." She said brightly. "Well, not you Embry." She reconsidered, as the quiet boy gave her a mock hurt look, putting a hand to his heart dramatically. The other two began to complain loudly, moaning about her rudeness.

"Get out of my car, _right now_. I can't bear to look at you." Quil said, turning his face away and taking a gulping breath of air. Alex snickered, Jacob helpfully passing her bag as she got out of the car.

"I'll see you tomorrow, babes." She blew a kiss into the car, slamming the door after herself. Quil waited until she was at her door before he drove away with a honk. She couldn't resist waving after them, just making out someone waving back out of the back window. She had a dumb grin on her face that she had to tone down. Thank _god_ they hadn't seen it – they'd tease her for _sure_, and they didn't need any more ammunition on that front. She eyed Paul's truck that was already sitting in their driveway as she fished out her key.

She let herself in, hurrying up the stairs to her room before anyone could see her and ask her how her day had been – like her answer may have changed in the past sixteen years. She could hear Paul and her dad talking in the living room, her mom and Kitty probably clattering and chattering in the kitchen, and Topher singing horribly from the shower. It was easy to be sucked in by the familiarity of the noise, to sink down onto her bed, and eventually fall asleep.

She was tired, there was no sense in denying it.

She didn't sleep well – she never had, not really. It was especially hard at night, when it was a little bit colder, a little bit too dark. Not that she was afraid of the dark. But the dark held too many… possibilities. She found it hard to switch off her brain – which led to her unfortunate napping habit.

Anytime, anywhere, naps and microsleeps would catch her unaware.

And now seemed like the perfect time to catch some REM, and she turned her face into the pillow – dead to the world within minutes.

* * *

It had been – surprise, surprise – raining on the day that Alex had met Jacob.

It was the afternoon after they'd all visited Kitty in hospital after her accident. Alex had been restless since she'd received the news, and seeing her sister – usually so upbeat – prone and pale, dwarfed by the hospital bed, unsettled her.

Alex had taken off for the beach when they'd gotten home – making some half-hearted excuse about needing fresh air, pretending she didn't see her father's disappointed sigh, or her mother's irritation as they helped Kitty into her bedroom.

It was already greying dangerously as she ran towards the patch of surf and sky she could see through the trees – and as she stepped foot onto the sand – the heavens opened and rain began to bucket down. So she stood and absorbed it all – the way the ocean had turned a fascinating shade of grey-green she'd never seen before, the sky so dark it was nearly black, the distant roll of thunder and flashes of lightning far off-shore, the way her hair was clinging to her face, her clothes sticking to her body and the chill racing up her spine.

She was so distracted by it all, distracted by trying to get out of her thoughts – that she didn't notice the overly tall figure walking towards her. In fact – she had screamed embarrassingly, when said figure had grabbed her shoulder to get her attention. A fact that she would always deny when retelling the story.

"_Hey, are you okay?!"_ Alex remembers Jacob shouting at her over the wind – looking half-confused and half-concerned at her vaguely catatonic state.

She remembers scowling at him, and telling him where to shove it – and remembers the way he'd grinned and offered her a towel that was already soaked, and telling her that he'd seen her around school, and that _she was new right, so what was her name?_

And then at school, Alex had found her normally lonely lunch interrupted by Jacob, Quil and Embry sitting down with her, and then over time, she stopped considering herself lonely.

* * *

"Hey, Alex – it's time to go."

Alex blinked back into irritated awareness with a hiss at whoever had woken her up. Topher just winked at her. "Good to see that you're not ready at all." He said teasingly, and she sat up, reaching for a pillow to toss at him. Topher had good reflexes – but Alex was always accurate – and she managed to hit him squarely in the face.

"Get out of my room, asshole." Topher held his hands up in surrender, lightly throwing the pillow back to her as he left the room. Date night for their parents meant that the three siblings were ejected from the house. Luckily for her and Topher, Kitty's connections to Emily meant they had a good dinner to look forwards to.

She waved at her mom and dad from the doorway, forgoing the hugs and kisses, and jumping into the back of Paul's truck. Paul turned around to look at her, narrowing his eyes at her. "You're not sleeping still?" he asked accusingly, sniffing slightly.

Alex wrinkled her nose. "Ew. Don't tell me you _smelt _that." Paul shrugged, and she gagged. "Stop _sniffing me you creep!" _she cried, as Topher opened the door and swung himself into the truck.

"What are we talking about?" he asked curiously, looking between Paul's smirking face and Alex's mortified screech.

Alex sat back, folding her arms instinctively. "None of your business." She muttered. Topher shrugged, turning to look out the window. Alex knew her brother was aware of the unspoken secret; after all, only she and her sister knew – and they were _not_ allowed to go and blab to anyone – even their own sibling.

When Kitty finally made it, Paul automatically switched the heat on, even before her sister rubbed her hands together with a faint wince. Alex reckoned one of the reasons Kitty liked Paul was for his body heat. Man was like a furnace. She sat back as the three eldest began talking.

She knew they didn't mean to talk over her – and besides, what the hell did she know about, like, _adult_ stuff. Paul had mentioned that he and Kitty had found a house, and Topher was all-too excited to help renovate it. _Adult stuff._

She hunkered down in her seat, tilting her head to watch out the window in silence, the green forest flickering past at speeds that turned it into a foreboding blur of a wall. She dreamt about the forest a lot. What it felt like to run through the trees, the touch of bracken under her feet, the stars wheeling above her.

* * *

Alex tried her best to sneak straight into the living room – but Emily, as always, managed to corner her and hug her hello. If Sam could magically turn into a wolf, then Emily could magically find the person she hadn't embraced with motherly affection, like some sort of weird bloodhound. Alex didn't have the heart to squirm out of her embrace, and so took it like a champ – making a face at Jared over Emily's shoulder.

Jared – the traitor – didn't come to her assistance either, when Emily employed her help in the kitchen.

"Emily – don't you remember last time?" Alex tried, but Emily acted like she hadn't heard – like she'd forgotten the disaster the kitchen had turned into last time Alex had been allowed to assist with the cooking.

"When you're finished mixing, just place a little in each of the moulds, and put them in the oven. The temperature is already pre-set." Emily said, manually positioning Alex's body into the right position to mix up the ingredients in the bowl.

"Are they… cupcakes?" she asked doubtfully, eyeing the cocoa powder on the top.

"Sure are, chicken." Emily said cheerfully, wielding her spatula over the pot of minced meat. "So, Paul tells me you've been having trouble sleeping still." Alex scowled at the back of Paul's head at the kitchen table – hoping he could sense her fury. _Asshole_.

She gets caught on _one_ midnight run, and suddenly – she's been diagnosed with insomnia.

"I'm fine. I don't know what he's talking about." She muttered, jabbing at the slowly incorporating mixture. She didn't have to look over to know that Emily was pulling her 'responsible and caring mother figure' face. "Seriously – I'm fine."

"I was doing some reading," Emily continued, handing her a muffin tray. "Napping during the day isn't going to help, Alex – it just makes it harder to fall asleep at night."

Alex slapped a spoonful of batter into the cupcake tray with a little too much force, watching dispassionately as the batter went splattering everywhere. "Sorry." She said unapologetically, reaching to grab the tea towel. Emily was staring at her worriedly. Luckily for Alex – Sam decided once again, he could not stand another second of being more than a foot away from Emily – and came into the kitchen to embrace her.

* * *

Alex spent her night relatively productively.

For the first few hours of sleeplessness she actually managed to get a good chunk of her homework done – but when the letters began to swirl, she knew it was probably time to stop before she gave herself a stroke or something.

Her eyes were burning, but closing them didn't do much good. Caught in the unhappy medium, she decided just to lie very still, and hope sleep took her.

Of course, it was a mere two hours before her alarm went off when she finally drifted off – and she woke up feeling worse than if she hadn't slept at all.

Dragging herself out of bed and into the kitchen – she forwent breakfast in favour of making the biggest coffee she could. It was worth the vaguely disgusted look on Topher's face at the sight of her _two_ travel mugs, when she could practically feel herself waking up with the smell of it.

The other inhabitents of the Faye house were all in varied states of alertness; her mother already typing away on her laptop with her work clothes on, Topher looking like he'd been on a rollercoaster with his hair in disarray, her father blinking sleepily over his eggs. Kitty was, of course, already gone. Alex had heard her distant call of goodbye as she'd gotten out of the shower, heard Paul's truck rumble off into the distance.

Speaking of – her own ride was probably waiting for her.

She wrapped her scarf hastily around her neck and reached for Topher's plate, snatching a piece of his toast. "Hey!" she ignored his half-hearted swipe at her, and made for the door.

"Alex – don't forget, Friday night is Family Night!" Her mom looked up over her glasses at her sternly. Alex scowled.

"But I made plans!" She'd plans just so she could get out of Family Night – but they didn't need to know that. "Dad – c'mon, I made plans with my _new_ _friends_." She stressed, turning to her father pleadingly. Her mother narrowed her eyes at her, and Alex knew she could see right through her flimsy pity-party.

Her father, however, still harboured guilt about moving them. And sure enough; "I suppose missing one night doesn't matter. You have fun." He said gruffly, giving her a short nod. "Don't make a habit of it."

_Hah. Whatever you say, daddio._

"Of course not!" Alex said brightly, fluttering her lashes and beaming wide. "I _hate_ missing out on our time as a family." Topher made a gagging noise and her mother's eyes narrowed, but Alex shoved the toast in her mouth, picked up her coffees, and skipped out of view before she could be called out for her blatant ass-kissing.

She slammed the door behind her as she went, dropping the smile as she encountered the foggy, cold air. Sure enough, Quil's car was idling at the bottom of her driveway, and she hurried towards it – praying the heater was on full blast. The door opened for her as she approached, Embry's smiling face the first thing to greet her, as he got out and relieved her of one of the coffees and her bag.

"You're an angel, Embry." She said seriously in greeting, and ducked into the car as he smiled slightly. "Hey, losers." She nodded at the others as Embry got back in the car.

"You look like shit." Quil said, eyeing her in the mirror.

Jacob twisted to look her up and down. "Are they _both_ yours? Do you _want_ a heart attack before you're thirty?" he pointed at her coffees. She bared her teeth at them.

"What is this? Pick on Alex day?" she demanded, taking a furious bite of her cold toast. Quil laughed as he flicked on his indicator.

"That's on Tuesday." Jacob said with a grin as he turned back around, dodging her swipe at him. "But seriously. That much caffeine is bad for you."

"Thank you, Dr. Oz." she rolled her eyes.

Embry frowned. "Are you not sleeping well?" he asked softly, looking at her in concern. Alex bit her lip hard, trying to hold back her building irritation.

"Yeah – you know, you should talk to a doctor about it." Quil said sagely.

"Could everyone shut the _fuck_ up about _my_ sleeping habits?" She snapped, "I'm fine – Jesus Christ – I don't need a babysitter telling me I need more naptime, I _know_!" Jacob and Quil were silent in the front seat, and she glared into the rearview mirror, hoping they were looking. It was none of their businesses, and she was _okay, dammit! _She only felt guilty when she noticed Embry shrink back slightly. She sighed, and turned her face out of the window. "Sorry." She mumbled.

Jacob cleared his throat, and reached back to pat her knee with his huge hand. "It's alright, Ally. It's not our business – but we're worried." She closed her eyes at his easy forgiveness.

"You can talk to us… y'know, if somethings, like, bothering you." Embry said, meeting her eyes full-on. Alex held his gaze, marvelling at his earnestness for one long, cheesy moment, before recoiling.

"Oh god – please no chick flick moments!" She whined – and shoved at him, breaking the eyecontact.

Quil laughed hard, making kissy faces at her, and batted away her crust that she threw – and launched into a loud lecture about_ littering in his car, you dirty rat! _Alex had forgotten the moment by the time they reached school, and by then, the caffeine had hit her too – and she even managed to smile as they entered Math.

_She wasn't lonely anymore. _


	3. Mine: Chapter 2

Alex eyed Jacob suspiciously as he bounced towards them, making his way through the cafeteria crowds with an even larger grin than usual on his face. It was no secret that Jacob was the eternal optimist in their little group – but his _glowing_ smile seemed a little excessive for first thing on a Monday morning.

He sat down with what Alex could only describe as a longing sigh. When his happy gaze fell upon them, and he sighed _again_ – Alex looked over at Quil, relieved to find that he looked as freaked out as she felt.

It was Embry who bit the bullet, clearing his throat a little nervously, and leaning around Alex slightly to meet Jacob's eyes. "Uh, what's up man?"

Jacob sat back, smile turning a little smug. "I met a girl. Or, like, re-met her, I guess." That spurred the immediate clamour of questioning from Quil and Embry. Alex just frowned, reasoning that the little pit in her stomach was residual worry from his dumb love-struck entrance. Jacob threw up his hands, "Guys – her name is Bella, and she's an old family friend."

"When does she start?" Alex asked, searching the cafeteria absently, as if she would find this mystery 'Bella' amongst the crowd of students.

"Oh, she's going to school off rez." Jacob's face twisted with momentary discomfort. "And she's… seventeen."

Quil burst into laughter, and even Embry sniggered – Quil punching Jacob's shoulder with no small amount of force. "NO WAY IS SHE INTO YOU!" he boomed, as Jacob rubbed his arm with a wince.

Alex cracked a smile. "Didn't know you were into cougars, Jake." She snarked, and he narrowed his eyes at her. The bell rang quickly after that, and she stood up as Quil made another crack about Jacob's love life. Embry moved with her, smiling at her. She grinned back. "Ready, Em?"

Embry sighed. "I'm never ready for literature."

Alex pulled a face, taking his tray from him to dump in the dirty crate with her own. "Emotionally or physically ready?"

"Both." Embry groaned. "I'm not spiritually ready either." He led their way through the hallways, stopping at her locker patiently.

Alex waggled her eyebrows at him, "_For there again, against the glass ... was the hideous author of our woe — the white face of damnation!"_ she quoted at him. "I can't believe Henry James knew that Mr. Williams was a pale-face." Embry laughed hard, clutching at his stomach. Alex smiled, pleased at his reaction. Embry always laughed at her jokes – even if they weren't very good – but it didn't stop her from appreciating his reaction. He straightened, eyes twinkling with mirth still, trying to fight his smile. Alex liked him best like this; so happy he could barely contain it.

She knew he got down on himself a lot – his mother rode him about his grades, his friends, his hobbies, and he didn't know who his father was; a fact that his mother liked to lord over his head. He was quiet at the best of times, but Alex couldn't help but worry about him, always watched him carefully.

She reached out and poked his cheek. "You look so pretty when you smile." She told him, delighting at the way his eyes widened.

He made a choking noise, ducking away from her hand, and turning to busy himself with his locker. "Wh- we, uh – y-you bring the book?" he stuttered out. Alex raised an eyebrow at his bizarre reaction, noting the blush just visible on his russet skin. She slowly raised her copy of The Turn of the Screw and waved it at him. He nodded. "C-cool." He pivoted in place, and began to hurry towards their classroom.

Shaking her head to herself, Alex followed him. _Weirdo_.

* * *

"Snacks!" Quil entered his bedroom loudly, slamming his door closed with his foot. Alex ignored him, continuing to stare hard at Quil's fish tank, and the suspiciously still goldfish floating near the top. "I got juice, I got pizza rolls, I got cookies, I got-"

"Dude, I think your fish is dead." Alex interrupted him. Quil's head snapped up and he darted towards the tank, spilling the cookies everywhere. Alex rolled off his bed and lazily began gathering the sweet treats back up as Quil examined his fish mournfully.

Then he smiled. "Nah. He's just faking it." Alex stared at him incredulously as he stuck a finger into the tank and _poked_ the fish. To her surprise, the goldfish wriggled in response and began to swim around the tank as if nothing had happened. "He likes to play dead."

"That's weird, man." Alex told him, handing him the cookies back and taking both cups of juice. He accepted the trade with a nod, and flopped back onto his bed. She re-joined him, kicking the math textbook to him. He opened it with one hand – shovelling a handful of cookies into his mouth with the other. She wrinkled her nose at the crumbs that went everywhere. Quil never seemed to care if he had company or not when he was being disgusting. Speaking of – "Where are the other two?" she asked, squinting at her own messy handwriting.

Quil looked up and around, as if only just realising they were alone. "Oh. Yeah." He shrugged. "Jake said he had to help his dad, and Embry…" he trailed off, turning to her slowly, like a character out of a horror movie, complete with a creepy grin. She recoiled against his bed head.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" she asked him, raising her foot to warn him off as he scooted closer. He leant further still, ignoring her pushing at his chest with her bare feet. "Quil! Quit it!" she whined.

"Let me be a wingman here!" he protested, shoving at her feet. "And get your nasty feet off me!"

"They wouldn't _be_ on you if you weren't being _weird_, and – wait, what did you say?" Alex narrowed her eyes, lowering her feet and setting aside her juices. Quil's eyebrows were doing that stupid little dance they did when he thought he was being clever. "**_Quil_**!" she barked, and he stilled, face going a little slack.

"Embryreallylikesyouandwantedmetoseeifyoulikedhimbackandifyouwantedtogooutsoon." Quil spilled his guts almost breathlessly, and Alex blinked rapidly – trying to process the mess of words. "Oh shit." He covered his mouth, shaking his head. "Embry's gonna kill me." He groaned, collapsing back.

Alex sat very still, thinking _very _hard.

Embry _liked _her.

'Oh shit' was right.

They were all as close as friends could be – but it seemed that she wasn't the only one who had been keeping a secret.

She chewed on her bottom lip, considering. She did _not_ want to hurt Embry – but she didn't want to lie and say she felt something she didn't. She _could_, it would be very easy to like Embry too – he was sweet and kind, kept her calm, wasn't too hard on the eyes… but-

_But._

So many buts.

No – she couldn't risk her secret, nor their group's dynamic.

"Quil – you **_cannot tell Embry I know_**_._" She said seriously, as her friend sat up, holding his gaze unblinkingly. He nodded.

"Don't worry – I won't." He cleared his throat, looking uncomfortable, "So, is that a… no? A yes? I don't get it."

Alex sniffed imperiously, bringing up her book to cover her face. "Don't worry about it, Quil."

"But-"

There was a thump and a grunt as a pizza roll hit Quil squarely in the forehead. He gave her an outraged look, meeting her glare over her notes.

"I _said, _don't worry about it."

* * *

Alex couldn't help but be more _aware_ of Embry after that.

The way he held her books, opened doors for her, stuck close by her in gym, sat next to her at lunch, laughed at what she said, kept his eyes on her face – and whilst it didn't irritate her, it did irk her.

Because in all honesty – Alex could say that Embry Call deserved someone a lot better than her. Someone more like her sister; kind and sweet like him, small and cute; everything she wasn't.

_Just one more to keep her up at night._

Jacob, bless him, at least seemed to be unaware of the weird tension between the other three; Quil with his guilty looks, Embry with his crush, and her with her constantly overanalysing brain.

So sue her, if she maybe was spending a little more time with Jacob – even if he brought up her sleeping habits and his kinda-not-really crush on his mystery Bella about twice every time they were together.

At least he wasn't making her feel bad.

"We should go to the beach soon." Jacob said casually, screwing down her skateboard's wheel. It was old, and had fallen apart far too many times; but now at least she had Jacob to fix it. Though he couldn't do much about the crack down the middle that she had desperately wrapped two rolls of duct-tape around six months ago, and had been holding together through sheer force of her will.

"We were just at the beach." She pointed out, frowning at his head of still-drying hair. It wasn't quite surf season yet, but Alex was just happy to swim, and if it took the promise of ice-cream to get Jacob in, so be it.

"Yeah – I mean like, all of us." He gave her board a pat, before rolling it back to her, where she was perched on his latest project; he'd decided he wanted to build car essentially from scratch. She admired it's smooth travel before stopping it with her foot.

"Thanks, Jake – and uh, yeah if you want…" She shrugged. "What's the occasion?"

"I don't know," Jacob took a big gulp of his soda, before eyeing her. "I just feel like something's been off with you guys."

_Fuck. Okay, never mind – definitely not unaware._

Alex – foolish and childish person she was – stuttered through what was supposed to be speech before deciding to shut up and try again. "I-no idea what you mean, ha-ha." She grinned at him brightly and completely falsely.

He gave her a disbelieving look. "You know, you're usually a good liar – but that was just embarrassing."

Alex made a sound half-way between hysterical laughter and a scream. Jacob just watched her, trying not to smile. But she caught the twitching of his lips. "Don't laugh at me, Jake – I'm _sensitive._" She whined.

Jacob gave up and laughed at her, sobering after a minute to give her a sage look. "If there's anything you want to talk about, let me know." He lowered his voice, "Have they been… _bothering_ you?" he asked.

Alex blanched, almost falling off the shell of the Rabbit in her haste to respond. "NO! God, no!" she shook her head, "No, it's – it's not that." Jacob stared at her for another minute; long enough that she began to feel self-conscious, and turned away from him as her cheeks began to heat automatically.

"Anyway. Did you wanna have dinner?" Jacob asked, and the moment passed, and they both forgot about it. Mostly.


	4. Mine: Chapter 3

Saturday dawned _almost_ sunny; sunny enough that they wouldn't freeze when they hit the surf – and so by midday, Alex found herself wetsuiting up in prospect of actually catching few waves.

Don't get her wrong – Alex was_ not_ great at surfing, but Quil was a fanatic, and on their second time hanging out, he'd forced her onto a board and out to sea. She had never been more grateful for anything.

She'd always been athletic; back in Colorado, she'd been on the cross-country track team in autumn, basketball in the spring, volleyball in the summer, skied and boarded in the winter, and had been doing gymnastics since she had been four years old. She knew her body and she knew her limits – and to her joy, surfing wasn't too far out of her comfort zone.

It was kind of like snowboarding; but with more variables, and more balance required.

And it was _fucking fun._

"Do you need help?" Jacob's voice suddenly behind her made her start slightly – but she nodded, giving up her struggle with her zip, and letting him pull up the zip and fasten her clasp. The feeling of his fingers on the back of her neck made her shiver, the chill of his skin shocking against her heated skin. It wasn't until she looked over at Embry that she realised he'd been watching. He turned away from her to look out at the surf, jaw working.

Alex sighed, and hefted her board. She couldn't make things weird. She wouldn't. She gave Jacob a wave – and jogged down the sand to meet Quil, who was shaking hands with a couple of kids she vaguely recognized. They must have been from Forks High, off the reservation.

"Yo, Alex!" The blond guy obviously knew her, but she couldn't place his face. The girl beside him was wearing glasses, but looked comfortable with her surfboard. Alex just opted to smile.

"Hey man." She greeted with a nod, looking to Quil for some kind of hint.

"Mike and Angela here just got down. Bunch of their friends are up top." Quil supplied, and she gave him a grateful grin, turning to make out the other group of teens on the beach – too far for her to see their faces. They looked to be making a fire, a bunch of them at work dragging along chunks of driftwood.

"Nice – peak time, huh?" Alex turned her smile onto Angela, who smiled back, albeit shyly.

"Gotta catch the first waves of the season." Mike said cheerfully, and Alex hid her smirk as Quil clapped him on the back with his usual amount of force, making the skinnier boy wince.

"You said it, my man."

Alex hung back a little with Angela, letting Mike and Quil jostle each other for the lead in the water. She paddled lazily, taking a cross-legged seat on her board as she waited for the swell. Angela mirrored her, straddling her board and keeping one eye on the horizon. Something about her reminded Alex of Kitty's friend Kim. Both outwardly quiet – yet something told her Angela was a riot. "How many people came down with you?" Alex asked, squinting at the group of people.

"A bunch of us actually. It's a little early in the season," Angela began, and Alex agreed – she had nothing against the residents of Forks, but it was unusual to see their teen populace at La Push beach so early in the year. It was practically still winter. "But Mike and Eric wanted to show Bella La Push. She's new."

Alex had to hide her surprise. "Bella? Like, Bella Swan?" she asked, and Angela nodded bemusedly.

"How do you know her?"

Alex shrugged, catching sight of a growing swell. "I don't – my friend does though. Jacob." She nodded in the direction of the wave. "Heads up, by the way." Angela smiled at her.

"All yours, Alex."

Alex shot her a wink in thanks, and began to paddle out, and turned herself around to catch the wave.

* * *

After her 16th wave, and yet another total wipe-out, Alex dragged herself into shore. Jacob and Embry had apparently joined the other teens around the fire, and so she began to make her way over, Quil marching behind her, carrying both of their boards. She would have felt more guilty if her last wipe-out wasn't a result of him cutting across her like an idiot. For good measure, she turned around and scowled at him again, just as more seawater and snot came dribbling grossly out of her sore nose. He just laughed at her.

She made a beeline for her other friends, eyes locked on her towel in Embry's grip. Embry spotted her approaching, and stood up, holding out the towel for her. It was only after he wrapped her in it, arms lingering around her for a moment too long that she remembered she was supposed to be distancing herself, and she stepped away like she'd been burnt, smiling at him uneasily. Jacob scooted over easily, and she sat down, looking around him at the short, pale girl he'd been talking to.

She was pretty, in a soft, delicate sort of way – with long chocolate brown hair, and deep eyes so dark they were almost black. She reminded Alex a little of snow-white; just without the black hair, or like, ability to talk to animals.

"Al, this is Bella. Bella, this is my best friend; Alexandra." Jacob introduced them, but Alex wouldn't have needed him to – not with the way his eyes lingered on Bella's face.

Bella reached across him, holding out her hand. "Nice to meet you, Alexandra, I've heard a lot about you." She said a little crisply, but her smile was genuine. Alex resisted the urge to wrinkle her nose at her full name.

Alex took her hand, noting how soft her grip was. Soft was the right word to describe Bella, it seemed. "Like wise, Jacob's been waxing poetic."

Jacob shoved her roughly, and she went sprawling back into Embry, who righted her with a chuckle, as she kicked at Jacob.

Across from them, a slightly weaselly looking blonde girl gave a simpering laugh. "I think it's good that Bella's got company. Her date bailed." Alex couldn't help her knee-jerk scowl at the condescending sounding girl.

Bella coloured spectacularly. "He wasn't a _date_, I just thought it would be nice to invite him. I was being polite."

Angela chimed in, "I think it's nice. No one ever does." Bella nodded gratefully.

Jacob frowned slightly. "Who?"

"Edward Cullen." The blonde girl laughed scornfully.

Alex felt something drop in her stomach. Fear, maybe, but definitely – a note of alarm. "Ah, yeah." She said faintly. Bella looked at her in faint surprise.

"You know him?"

Alex clenched her jaw. Knowing about Paul, and Jared and Sam and the Pack meant she knew a lot of things she wasn't supposed to. It also meant she knew a lot of things that scared her. The Cullens were one of them. Every person on the Rez knew, the Cullens were not welcome. Whether or not they knew _why_ depended on who they were. Unfortunately, Alex knew why. It was Quil however, who caught her. "The Cullens don't come here." He said lowly, with more than a little hostility.

Bella recoiled a little, and Alex looked away – staring into the fire. It wasn't long after that, when she heard Bella ask Jacob in an oddly sultry voice, if they could '_take a walk_.' Alex hunkered down, leaning into Quil and Embry as the fire burned low, trying to ignore that odd pit in her stomach again, and the remnants of the dread still in her system.

* * *

The end of year exams began to loom a lot faster than any of them were prepared for, and Alex was feeling the heat.

She wasn't particularly academically inclined, and her general dumbness paired with her constant exhaustion began to kick her ass in more ways than one. Quil had always been her designated math study buddy, but he was starting to be more like her designated math tutor, with the amount of time he spent trying to teach her.

It didn't help that she kept falling asleep.

"_ALEX!"_

She jolted upright with an ugly snort, blinking her heavy eyes to try and clear her vision. Quil's unimpressed face next to Embry and Jacob's concerned ones made her pull a sheepish smile. "Did I drool?"

"Alex, seriously." Jacob gave her a pitying look. "It's not healthy."

She waved him off. "Dude, I'm fine. I just need, like, a couple more minutes, and then I'll be study-ready." Quil narrowed his eyes at her, and she glared back. "Just wake me in… five."

Alex's eyes were already closing before she finished speaking, and she lowered her head back onto her notes. Hopefully she'd absorb some knowledge through osmosis or something. Not… that… she… even knew… what… osmosis… was…

Her dreams were dark. They were always vaguely nightmarish, part of why she struggled to sleep.

_She was in a grand hall, beautiful and cold. Marbled and intricately designed, it was all edged in gold leaf. It was the finest piece of architecture she'd ever seen. _

_But there was something about the shadows, in-between the statues of gods and warriors, under the eaves, behind the thrones lining a dais ahead of her. Something about the shadows that made her heartbeat pick up. They were thick – more like true darkness, than just the shade of the day. If she looked too hard, her eyes seemed to pick up a movement; like the writing of serpents, or the scurrying of rats. _

_Still, she walked towards the three thrones, despite the coalescing of the worst of the dark there, looming over the thrones, darkening the faces of the carved angels above the seats until they resembled demons. _

_It was a dream, she knew it was a dream, and yet she had no control – as she walked up the three steps, and knelt; knelt before the middle throne. Slowly, she reached out, fingers trembling – and touched the convolutedly carved ebony wood._

_It was like touching ice, ice so cold that it burnt her. And yet, she couldn't take her hand away – as the darkness behind the chairs began to swirl again, whispers of things she couldn't understand beginning to echo from statues' mouths, distant screams coming from the halls behind her. And eyes._

_Eyes watching her, on her face, on her hands, eyes looking into her soul. _

_Red as love, red as rage, red as blood._

_The eyes of a Cold One._


	5. Mine: Chapter 4

Alex woke up with a start, a gasping breath forcing itself out of her mouth as she clutched desperately at whatever was supporting her. It took a second for her to realise where she was.

_Safe_.

Still at Quil's house, still in his living room.

She closed her mouth tightly, trying to control her panting breath. A warm hand closed over her own, and she followed it's movements – realising that it was a shirt she still had in her grasp. Looking up, she found herself meeting Embry's worried eyes.

She was still half-draped over him – and she flushed.

_This wasn't supposed to happen._

"Are you alright?" he asked softly, as if they were alone, and Quil and Jacob weren't still staring at her like she was crazy.

She recoiled, shoving herself away from the table and away from Embry's warm grip and her other friend's eyes. "I- need some air." She choked out, and hurried for the back door. It was cooling rapidly outside as night began to fall, but compared with the remnants of the chill from her dream; it was practically tropical.

That dream had felt too real; though her nightmares always had a genuine quality to them – this was something else. She'd dreamt about Cold Ones before, sometimes even in the shape that she knew them – Doctor Cullen had popped up in her fitful nights many a time – but she'd never seen such _vivid _eyes before, had never felt a cold like that before, seeping into her very bones-

"Alex."

She clenched her jaw, schooling her features before she turned back around to face Embry. He looked, as always, concerned. "I'm fine, Em." She said shortly, maybe a little too brusquely, as he flinched slightly. "I'm sorry-"

"No, you're not." He cut across her, uncharacteristically irritated. His jaw was working. "I don't know what I've done, but you won't talk to me anymore. You barely hang out with me, and when we do – you're always so… so…" he struggled to find the words, and Alex felt her stomach sink in something like fearful anticipation. She took a step closer as he shook his head in frustration. "You've been a real asshole, and I just want to know why – is it because I-"

Too afraid to hear what he was about to say, Alex threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around him so tight that he gasped a little. He recovered quickly, arms coming up to hold her to him, and she tried not to react at the way his body relaxed into her, how he buried his face in her shoulder. "Embry – I'm sorry. I really am." She whispered. _Sorry I can't be what you want. Not while I have secrets that aren't mine, not while I feel this scared. _She thought silently. She pulled away from him, and took a step back. _And I'm sorry I'm about to ditch you._ "Em, would you mind grabbing my jacket? I think I left it in Quil's room." He nodded easily, and she waited until he had gone inside to turn back to the woods.

She wasn't afraid of _this_ dark. She had never minded the shadows beneath the canopy, the darks patches of loam and moss, the far-off sounds of nature, both dangerous and benign. The forest was peace, and as she stepped into the trees, she felt her heart slow a little.

She walked until she couldn't see Quil's house anymore, until she couldn't hear the road, until all she could see was green. She could feel guilt pang at her, because Embry would be _freaking_ out, and Jacob would be worried and Quil would be annoyed she'd just left all her stuff there, but she needed to talk to someone who might know what the dream meant. Alex pulled out her phone and sent a group text, apologising for leaving, saying Topher picked her up, saying she'd grab her things tomorrow and _don't worry, I'll see you all tomorrow._

Then, she turned her face to the sky, and screamed.

_"**PAUL!**"_

It didn't take him long to find her, it never did. By now, she knew the sound of the pad of his paws, how long his strides were – he wasn't quite as quick as Sam, but moved swifter than Jared did, and was a better tracker than both of them; he usually preferred to find her from where she'd been rather than where she was going.

She turned to the direction of the faint huffing growl, in time to see her sister's boyfriend poke his silver muzzle through the brush, the rest of his massive body following near soundlessly. He trotted over to her, and she waited until he had properly sniffed her over, before sitting back on his haunches expectantly. She reached out to touch his furred cheek, stroking him once.

"Sorry – I just, I need to talk to Sam."

If she could have called Sam, she would have, but the likelihood of reaching him – or indeed any of the three wolves was slim. They'd been patrolling on the double recently, what with the police reports trickling down from Seattle and the surrounding areas about 'animal attacks' ending in death. After the death of a Forks resident, Alex wasn't even sure Paul had been human for longer than the eight hours he took to eat and sleep.

But she knew that he'd be near her or her sister out of habit more than anything, and considering Quil didn't live too far from her sister's babysitting, calling Paul was her best bet.

Paul waggled his massive head from side to side, a move of confusion more than anything, as he sniffed at her again. She sighed. "I had a dream." If wolves could laugh, then Paul would be cackling. As it was, he just made a weird chuffing whine, before standing up and shaking out his fur. "Paul, seriously – it wasn't just a dream. It felt, like, _real_." As she said the words, she felt her palm throb with cold, like blood struggling to circulate.

Paul's head dipped towards her once again, and she stilled as he nosed at her hand, the one that had gotten so cold. Slowly, she turned her hand over – and felt bile rise in her throat.

There, outlined in the red lines of a burn mark, was a gorgeous v-shaped sigil, surrounded by flowers.

The same sign that had been carved into the wood of the giant thrones. The same sign that had lined the walls, outlined in black marble on the floors.

Paul whined at her, and she looked up to meet his gaze. She could see herself, reflecting in his honey brown eyes. She looked pale and frightened. "Would you believe me if I said that wasn't there before I fell asleep?" she asked in whisper.

In response, Paul turned, lowering himself for her.

It wasn't the first time she'd ridden one of the wolves. It didn't stop her feeling like she was flying. She wound her fingers into his fur, and settled down low against him, as he picked up pace – until they were moving so quickly that the world blurred. She refused to shut her eyes, even as the wind made them stream with tears.

_This was magic._

* * *

She shouldn't have been surprised when she began to recognize some of her surroundings, as Paul slowed in his approach. They were near Jacob's house, and she hunkered down instinctively.

"Paul – what if Jacob's home?" she hissed, even though, she knew rationally – unless he'd driven back the second she'd left – he couldn't have beaten them back. Paul made his weird chuckle noise again, and breached the trees. Sam and Billy were waiting for them at the bottom of Billy's ramp, Jared on the porch, asleep. Now, Alex could sense Paul's own exhaustion. He was lagging slightly, head drooping and panting. She felt her stomach twist, as he padded on doggedly towards the house. Movement in the house drew both of their attention, and Alex frowned as she recognized the two figures inside.

Her sister opened the back door slowly, eyes fixed on Jared's sleeping form with her lip caught in her teeth, shadowed by Sue Clearwater, who had a plate of what looked to be biscuits in her grip. Upon seeing her sister, Paul perked up again, and moved a little faster.

Alex couldn't make out the expression on her sister's face, but when she met Kitty's bright green eyes, she smiled slightly, her dimples popping and making the gesture sweeter than it already was. Her sister moved to join them, and Alex made out the bundle of denim under her arm for Paul. "Thank you." She leant forwards to murmur into Paul's ear. He chuffed, and knelt, letting her slide down his side. She walked next to him, though, taking comfort in his familiar bulk as Billy and Sam's unreadable eyes settled onto her.

Kitty met them half-way, and Paul veered off to follow her, eyes tracking her every movement. It would have been a little scary, if for the sheer amount of affection in both of their gazes.

But it left her alone in front of the two men she internally considered the ultimate authority in her little world. Whether or not it had to do with the wolf thing, or just the fact that they both exuded auras of confidence and wisdom – she wasn't completely sure. Either way, she couldn't help but bow her head a little under their gaze.

"Show me your hand, Alexandra." She didn't dare correct Billy, as she held out her hand for him to examine. Billy didn't run as hot as Paul and the others, but there was still a warmth to his hands that she didn't think was quite human. His fingers were gentle as they ran over the sigil-like pattern emblazoned on her palm. "Can you tell me what you were dreaming about?"

_Dark shadows, marble and blood._

Alex shuddered. "I- I was in a hall, I think. It looked a little like a church. Maybe a throne room." She worried at her bottom lip as she tried to remember, a habit she had picked up from her sister, her sister who was probably being comforted by Paul right now, and _god_, _she would love a hug right about now_-

"Alex." Sam's rumble made her look up, startled. He was looking at her just as intensely, but not unkindly. "_Can you tell us what you remember?" _

Somehow, it helped, like a hook in her insides pulling it out of her – but not at all painful – she could think a little clearer. She didn't dare look away from his stare, just incase it broke the spell. "It _was _a throne room. It was foreign. It was built out of marble and gold, and lined with statues I didn't recognize. At the centre of the room, there was a… a platform. No – um, like, a dais. And it had…" _Looming darkness, the epicentre of evil. _Billy squeezed her hand he was still holding, and she swallowed, and continued. "It had three thrones. And that – that sign. It was everywhere."

"And what happened?" Billy asked her softly.

Alex shook her head, despite the tug in her guts. "I – I just…" she took a breath. "I got down, in front of the thrones, and I _touched_ it. I just touched it, and then they were _looking at me – _they were all looking at me, _through_ me-" she was babbling, trying to explain how it felt, free hand coming up to clutch at her chest, fingers digging into her flesh in a way that stung.

"Who? Who was looking?" Billy asked her firmly.

Above them, the weather was worsening, the wind picking up around them as the sun began to be swallowed by the horizon and the thickening clouds.

"They were- I don't know who they _were_!" Alex cried, as a thunderclap echoed overhead.

"Who?" Billy repeated – hanging onto her hand now, as she absently tried to free herself from his grip.

"Billy-" Sam's voice was worried, as Alex began to shake slightly.

She couldn't explain the rush of fear that was practically freezing her in place. It felt unnatural, and all-consuming, and yet disconnected – like it wasn't even her afraid. And the hook was tugging tighter, hotter, and yet her tongue was getting heavier and heavier. She took a deep breath, trying to fight against the polarizing sensations.

"_The Cold Ones._"

She managed to gasp it out, and dropped to her knees at the sudden wave of exhaustion that hit her. The heavens opened at the same moment, and the force of the sudden deluge made her tremble, her hand still caught in Billy's grip.

"Get her inside." It was muted, but Alex still heard Sam's barking order, a new set of arms closing around her and lifting her as if she weighed nothing, tearing her hand away from Billy's grip. She was still conscious – but so, _so_ tired.

It must have been Jared holding her, the skin too heated to be anyone else; Sam pushing Billy in front of her, Sue, Paul and her sister looking horrified from the porch. It was like she was looking at images in a picture book. She didn't feel connected.

Jared propped her up on the couch, barricading her in with pillows, and one hand holding her in place, as if she might keel over when he turned his back. She wasn't so sure she wouldn't. Kitty crouched in front of her, Jared standing over them both looking anxious. She could dimly hear Billy and Sam talking rapidly about something in the kitchen.

"Hey, Al – how are you feeling?" Kitty interlinked their fingers, Alex looking slowly down at their hands before looking back at her sister.

"Confused. Tired." She supplied. She looked hesitantly at Jared, Kitty tracking her gaze. She stood, all five-foot-nothing of her against Jared's bulk, and made a shooing motion.

"Go… get a blanket or something." Her sister dismissed.

Jared frowned. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. Sam and Paul are in the other room." Kitty stood her ground, waiting until Jared had lumbered off with a shrug before she turned back to Alex. She sighed, and batted away some of Alex's makeshift pillow fort, and slid into their place, curling around Alex. "What else?" she asked quietly.

Alex closed her eyes, taking comfort in her sister. "I'm afraid. I've never… never felt like that before." She muttered, pretending to be adjusting her position rather than snuggling into her sister.

Kitty was quiet, and Alex didn't want to ask if she was thinking or just worried. "I know you've had… nightmares before." Kitty began slowly, and Alex almost scoffed. Yeah – for the first week after accidently catching Paul mid-turn, she'd had gory, weird dreams about it. But she hadn't been _afraid_, just… just a little grossed out. "But this was different, wasn't it?" Alex nodded silently, and wordlessly offered her palm for her sister to see. Kitty sucked in a surprised breath. "Alex-"

Whatever she had been going to say she cut off as Billy and Sam returned to the room, Paul coming in after them, and taking a seat next to Kitty, stretching his arm around the both of them. Deliberate or not, she leant against his hand absorbing its warmth against her chilled skin.

Billy sat back in his wheelchair to regard her. "Alex, I know you're familiar with our legends – but what do you know about Dream Walking?"

Alex frowned. "Uh, nothing?"

Billy nodded, and turned to Sam. "Jacob will be home soon." It was a general statement, and yet, also served as a dismissal. There was an unspoken rule, that Jacob wasn't to be rushed into Turning. It was why Alex never really had him over, just in case Paul was home. Sam and Billy both agreed they wouldn't pressure Jacob, but it didn't stop them from keeping an eye on him. Lucky for Jacob, Alex served as a sort of missive; she knew what to look for, and so far Jacob hadn't shown any signs of Turning – apart from his already freakish height. It just meant that he was a little more free from the Pack's eye. For now, anyway.

"Come on, Jared, Paul." Sam said, a little reluctantly. Jared poked his head back into the room.

"Oh, am I allowed back in now?" he asked, a little sarcastically – and Kitty glared at him, chucking a pillow at him. He caught it easily, and lifted his arm to return it – stopping at Paul's warning growl. He rolled his eyes, dropping it onto the other armchair instead.

"We're leaving. We're behind on patrol now." Sam said, and Alex felt her stomach twist.

"I'm sorry." She apologized to the room at large.

Paul ruffled her hair. "Don't be sorry, Big A – your safety is important." He said easily, and stood. He bent to kiss her sister, and Alex looked away from the gentle embrace. "I'll see you later, kitten." He whispered to her, and Kitty nodded, flushing a little.

"Be safe." She murmured back, and he touched her cheek fondly.

"Always."

With that, the wolves left – and the air got a little lighter. Sue cleared her throat. "Kitty, did you want me to wait for you?"

Kitty shook her head, smiling at the older woman. "It's fine, you go on ahead. I'll meet you at Emily's later." Sue nodded, and gathered up various plates and her keys. Alex looked at Kitty, who grinned. "Girls night. Movies, nails, goss. You want to come?"

"Um." Alex couldn't really think of anything worse. "No thanks." She said tactfully. Kitty laughed, and stood.

"I'll drop you home before I go then." She turned to Billy, "What are you eating tonight, Billy?"

Billy shifted uncomfortably. "Probably… pizza." He said gruffly, clearly just as unused to her sister's care as Alex was.

"Not anymore." Kitty said decidedly, and headed for the kitchen. Billy watched her go with a faint smile.

"Sometimes I miss when she was too shy to say hello." Alex mused jokingly.

Billy chuckled, shaking his head. "It's nice to see." He said fondly. "They've both grown together." Alex knew that one of the biggest reasons she had trusted Paul, and been trusted with such a secret was because the Pack wasn't just a collection of people hiding unnatural beings; it was a family. The love and care they all shared was something to marvel at – and even now, it still took Alex by surprise how much they would do for each other. For her; an angry, moody fifteen year old.

They grew quiet, the background noise of Kitty's quiet, sweet voice singing, the pans clattering, and the dull thud of her knife against the chopping block fading, as Alex grew aware of the rising tension.

It was Billy who broke their silence. "Before we were wolves, we were Spirit Warriors." He said.

"I know about that; how they became 'the wind, the water, the world'." She quoted, and Billy nodded.

"Dream Walkers were members of the tribe who were able to live through others," Billy said, and Alex shook her head in confusion. "They could walk in other people's dreams or memories – not in a dissimilar way to how our warriors would fight. They could see through the eyes of others, dream what they dream, see what they see, move as they move, go to places of memory."

"What, like, possession?" Alex asked dumbly.

Billy tilted his head considering. "I suppose, if one was strong enough, theoretically – a Dream Walker could enter a person's consciousness and control them." Alex gulped nervously. "But there has not been a Dream Walker for an age." He said seriously, "Warriors usually took the Walkers as wives – for the Dream Walkers could tether a Spirit Warrior's soul. Make them stronger, guide them. The First Wife of Taha Aki was the greatest Dream Walker to be known to our Tribe – and some theorize, the first Imprint."

Alex had been nodding along, until Billy gave her a meaningful look, and she recoiled. "Wait, what does this have to do with me?"

Billy searched her face for a long moment. Finally, he sat back. "I don't know yet. But – Alexandra, you must _be careful_." Alex pressed her lips together. She'd never seen the man look so grave. "I don't know what that sigil means – but," he sighed, looking pained. "There are others that might."

Alex frowned, "Who else-?"

The sound of the front door opening made them both jump slightly, Kitty's loud greeting and Jacob's surprised voice breaking the atmosphere. Alex only had a second to school her features into something that hopefully didn't look like she had just had her brain turned inside out by supernatural secrets. Jacob came through the doorway – and stopped short at the sight of her.

"Alex?"

"In the flesh." She smiled at him, and he frowned – ignoring her – turning to his dad.

"What's going on?" he asked.

Billy sighed, and rolled himself into the kitchen, Jacob following – and Alex scrambled after the both of them, shadowing Jacob a little nervously. He looked mad. "Kitty came round to fix dinner; and Alex came with her. Nothing's 'going on', Jacob."

Jacob rounded on Alex then, making her jump and grin widely in reflex. "You said your brother came and got you. Why'd you split like that anyway, you freaked us all out." He chastised her.

This time, it was Kitty who came to her rescue. Standing after sliding a dish into the oven, she put her hands on her hips. "Topher dropped her home, and then I made her come right back out with me because I thought she could apologize to you for leaving." Alex felt her eyebrows jump at how casually her sister lied.

"Oh." Jacob said, and turned back to her.

Alex grinned even wider. "Sorry I scared you, Jakey."

He scowled, "I wasn't _scared_." He muttered.

"Awww, you _do_ care!" she nudged him.

"You're so _annoying_." he groaned, and nudged her back, failing to hide the grin spreading across his face. Her chest warmed at the sight, and she leant into him slightly as Kitty began to rattle off instructions about their dinner. Jacob leant back, and she knew she was forgiven.

_It was still too close for comfort._


	6. Mine: Chapter 5

Alex knew she was being watched now.

It was the flicker of fur through the trees outside windows, the texts from her sister and Paul, the constant invitations to dinner at Emily and Sam's.

All it did was make her more afraid to sleep.

Whilst she knew that the possibility of her actually _being_ a Dream Walker – whatever that _actually_ was – was far from likely, she was still hesitant to close her eyes now. The mark on her palm hadn't faded, and she had taken to wearing one glove; claiming she was making a tribute to Michael Jackson, and enduring her friends' relentless teasing.

Of course – Alex was only human.

And slowly, very slowly, everything came crashing down. It was getting harder and harder to keep everything separate; keep the wolves from her friends, keep Embry from her, keep her sleepless nights from ruining everything else. Stress was her every day, her every waking moment – and _god_ did she have a lot of waking moments.

But she could only blame herself for collapsing midway into the school excursion.

It had started as a normal day; running on about forty minutes of sleep, no food, and an excessive amount of coffee. Of course, the headache was also normal, but the way it persisted even after her usual double aspirin-paracetamol combo was unusual, but not enough to worry her. She had more important things to worry about, after all, including Embry's downcast face and silence on the ride there.

She managed to get what was wrong out of him; the standard terror of his mother being the worst human ever, and throwing out a bunch of his things in the name of 'charity.' If she could, she'd turn into a wolf and scare the woman to death. Or, like, at least into a hospital.

The beginning of the excursion was normal too; learning about the history of Washington, pretending to listen to the tour guide, immediately leaping for Quil – who was closest – when they were told to get into groups, pretending to finish their worksheet whilst really writing crass nicknames for all the old guys that were supposedly important. You know, just normal high school excursion things.

But when her nose began to bleed, and her vision went a little white around the edges, she knew that it was probably _not_ a normal day.

Quil followed the splatter of blood on their page up to her face, eyes going wide. "Oh – Alex, holy shit-_shit!"_ she swayed, and he dropped their clipboard with a clatter, drawing the attention of the rest of the class, as he quickly stabilised her.

"Hah. Yeah. Shit." Alex managed to smile weakly, and nodded at him once. Then, the white encompassed her vision and she felt her body crumple.

* * *

The gods, or God, or fate, or Fates – or _whoever_ – must have been messing with her.

When Alex opened her eyes, she wished she could close them again. Because, just her luck, the doctor standing over her was the _last _person she ever wanted to see.

"Cullen…" the name curled from her lips before she could stop herself. To his credit, the doctor didn't react, finishing whatever he was writing on his clipboard before handing it to the nurse. Then they were alone. She couldn't help her body's reaction, the way her pulse quickened and she began to sweat.

"Miss Faye." Carlisle Cullen turned his brilliant, perfect smile onto her. It was a little dizzying, how mesmerising he was, but Alex just took one look at his unnatural amber eyes, and reminded herself that _this was a killer_. "I surmise you know-"

"I know you're a bloodsucker?" Alex interrupted him hoarsely.

His face tightened, almost imperceptibly. "Yes." He said delicately. "Whilst I was surprised to see you today, I must admit it makes things easier."

"What are you talking about?" Alex asked warily, drawing her legs up under the thin covers.

The vampire smiled again. "I was contacted by one of the Elders. He said that you have something I should see?"

Alex tightened her jaw. _Billy._ _Surely he wasn't serious._ But… if anyone else could tell her what it meant, she'd be grateful, even to a… no – she couldn't be grateful. She swallowed hard, fighting against a surge of revulsion, but offered her hand to him. The mark was fading a little, but still visible.

He seemed to know that she wouldn't want him touching her, and so he simply bent, folding his hands behind his back. It only took him a second; but his eyes went wide. "Where did you get this?" he asked.

She scowled. "Does it matter? Do you know what it is, or not?"

The doctor's face went blank. "Yes, I know what it is. It's a sigil."

Alex rolled her eyes. "No shit, doc."

His eyes met hers suddenly. "It's not something we can talk about here." Already, she was shaking her head. "I can only show you. If I tell you… then it will end badly. For both of us."

"I'm not afraid of vampires." Alex lied. "I have protection."

"The wolves are no match for…" he looked pointedly at her palm. He sighed. "Would it make you feel more comfortable with another human present?"

"Not really…" Alex muttered. But curiosity was threatening to get the better of her. And it wasn't like she'd be completely alone. With _another_ human, or whatever, and Sam wouldn't let her go without them – _not like she needed Sam's permission, but_\- She shook her head, clearing her distracting thoughts. "Fine. I'll go. And if you try to eat me – I'll sic the Pack on you." She tried to sound threatening, but as tired as she was, it came out a lot meeker than she wanted to.

The doctor just smiled gently. "I'm prescribing you sleeping pills, Alex – your body is exhausted. I would recommend taking a few days off if you can." He paused on his way to the door. "You should try and sleep now."

She tried to salute him, but whatever was in the IV hooked up to her hand was making her woozier by the second. Instead, her hand flopped weakly to her chest as her eyes slid shut. She missed her visitors, but they stayed until she woke up – the three of her boys asleep around her.

Jacob was holding flowers.

* * *

"No. Absolutely not."

Sam was immovable, arms crossed with his biceps bulging spectacularly, and glaring at her with full force.

"You look like Popeye." Alex told him.

"Alex…" his voice was a warning growl.

Alex resisted the urge to stomp her foot. "Sam – it's the_ only_ way to know what the fuck is going on-" She whirled and scowled at the quiet _'language' _from a smirking Paul. "What is going on with this!" she waved her hand in his face. "And besides, _Billy _called him. Are you saying Billy is wrong?"

Sam sighed, running a hand over his face. "No, I'm not saying that – what I'm saying is that I am _not_ letting you waltz into a vampire nest by yourself."

"She won't be by herself, Sammy." Emily piped up from the kitchen, and Alex turned to give her a grateful smile. "There'll be someone else with her, and I'm sure you guys won't be far away."

"Listen, I'll get in, get what I need, and get out." Alex turned back to Sam. "Paul can drive me, and wait out the front, and you guys can hang out the back. It's foolproof."

"Uh, when did I sign up for driving?" Paul chimed in again.

"When you started banging my sister." Alex retorted, making Kitty flush and Paul's smirk widen. Sam sighed again, looking to ceiling as if praying. "Sam, I _have_ to know. It's driving me crazy."

With the help of Doctor Cullen's magic pills, Alex had actually been sleeping for more than two hours at a time. Granted, it was a dead, heavy, unnatural sleep that she never dreamt in, but it was sleep. She felt on top of the goddamn world.

Sam's frown deepened, in the way that meant he was thinking hard. Alex had to ask herself, _again_, why she'd even bothered to ask permission. She should have just told Paul on the day, and see who rocked up whilst she was inside. But it was that weird obligation again, a similar feeling to the tugging in her gut, during her episode.

_Pack magic._

She shook her head.

Finally, Sam uncrossed his arms. "Fine." Alex grinned, and he held up a finger. "I have _conditions,_" he stressed, "number one, you keep your phone on and off silent, and you check in every five minutes, no exceptions. Number two, if you feel unsafe at _any _time, scream. Number three, Paul escorts you to and from the door. Number four, you come straight back after you've gotten what you need. And we reserve the right to get you if at any time we feel something is wrong, or if you're in there too long. Treaty or no treaty."

Alex blinked at him. "Wow, Sam." She simpered, "You really do know how to make a girl feel special." He grumbled something, and moved past her, ruffling a little roughly at her hair. She grinned, shaking her short hair back into place.

She wasn't exactly _excited_, but she would have been lying if she'd said that the butterflies in her stomach were all fear.


	7. Mine: Chapter 6

Okay, maybe she was having second thoughts – but she was _not_ going to let Paul know that, especially since he looked a second away from turning the truck around on his own violation.

He muttered something to himself again as they turned up the long gravel driveway, fingers tight around the steering wheel, and glared at the house as it appeared out of the trees. It was, architecturally speaking, beautiful. And yet, it seemed cold, and Alex felt a pang of longing for Emily and Sam's cosy home. Paul slowly drew the truck to a stop behind a silver Volvo. "Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked her quietly, and she couldn't help the swell of affection for him, at the seriousness in his eyes.

"I don't trust them, but I trust you." She said. "If I need you, you'll be there, right?"

Paul reached out to tug affectionately at her hair. "Always, Big A." She grinned at him, and scooted back to get out of the truck. "Phone?!" he asked her, and she paused to fish it out of her pocket, waiting until he nodded to shut the door.

The sound of the front door opening behind her made her jump a little, and she turned in place to see Doctor Cullen waiting and smiling beatifically at her. He looked far more relaxed than he had the last time they had met, though when his eyes slid over her to the truck, his smile faded a little. Alex followed his gaze to see Paul waving sarcastically and looking generally hulking and imposing. She smiled a little, as he held up his wrist, tapping it and mouthing: _five minutes. _She nodded, and made the walk up the grand entrance.

"Alexandra – I must admit I am a little surprised you made it, however-" The doctor began, stepping aside so she could enter.

Alex's smile fell, and she raised an eyebrow. "Did you really think I'd come alone? I'm a thrill-seeker, not suicidal." From above her, she heard the faintest chuckle. Her eyes narrowed, and she paused in the entry way. "Is eavesdropping a popular pastime for you lot?" she asked the ceiling pointedly. Carlisle coughed delicately, and closed the door.

"I assure you, our conversation will be _private_." He said, looking up at the ceiling as well. He gestured up the stairs. "After you. We can talk in my office."

Alex shook her head. "Uh, sorry – after _you_." So what? She didn't like the feeling of walking into a room of vampires with one right behind her – she didn't really like getting into crowded escalators either.

Carlisle, to his credit, just smiled – and led her up the stairs. The house was surprisingly light inside, all big bay windows and high ceilings – and the décor was just random enough to be genuine, rather than display-homey. Of course, all of the house's charms fell away when she came face to face with the rest of the occupants.

She almost hightailed it out of there when she made eye contact with the blonde vampire wielding a broom and looking murderous over a pile of smashed glass and lettuce. "This is Alex Faye, from the reservation." Carlisle introduced her, and the physically biggest of them all – nothing compared to Paul or Sam, but besides the point – snorted.

"Yeah, she stinks like dog."

She narrowed her eyes at him, previous fear fading to distinct irritation. "Yeah, and _she's_ got half a mind to let the dogs at you."

He chuckled. "_And_ she's got a spine." She scowled again, and turned to Carlisle, not in the mood to exchange pleasantries – or insults – with a group of vampires.

"Can we get this over with?" she asked, and fished out her phone to check the time. A minute before first check-in. She sent an all clear anyway, getting a vomit emoji in response. She grinned.

Carlisle nodded and led the way again. She gave the blonde a wide berth, even turning to walk backwards to keep her eyes on her. She swore the blonde's lips twitched before she turned away and resisted the urge to say something snappy. What she would have said was anyone's guess, but she was still running on a little adrenaline, and was unsure if she wanted to run still.

Carlisle's office was a different kind of beautiful; leather and dark wood, and bookcases stretching to the ceiling. She couldn't help but stare at all of his things; antique glasses and globes, medical equipment, old books she couldn't read the titles of – and a huge painting, exquisite; clearly the work of a master artist.

But there was something about the image; the three men at the centre of it all were strangers, and yet something made her step a little closer. The revelry beneath them in the painting only made them seem more central, more angelic; despite the slightly cruel lines of their faces as they sneered down upon the people below them. And the other man on the balcony with them was even more familiar; and her eyes widened as she recognised the doctor standing silently behind her. "That's you?" she blurted, before she could stop herself.

"Yes, that… that was me. With men I once considered friends."

Alex couldn't help but throw an annoyed look over her shoulder. "Are all vampires so fucking cryptic?" He chuckled, shaking his head ruefully.

"My apologies, Alexandra."

She turned back to the painting, examining the faces of the three men. Closer now – she could make out the red of their irises. "They're vampires." She said in surprise. Squinting at the man in the middle, she felt a chill run down her spine, as she recognised the pattern on the necklace he was wearing. Slowly, she lifted her hand, praying she was wrong – splaying her palm next to the painting.

Though faded, the lines on her palm were still recognizable, and she felt bile rise in her throat. "What are they?"

Carlisle moved silently, but she didn't flinch as he appeared suddenly in her periphery. "The Volturi." She clenched her fist, lowering it back to her side. "If our people had royalty, that would be them. They live in Italy, amongst a handful of chosen few. They are… a governing council – they enforce our laws."

"Laws?"

"Yes, the obvious; no conspicuous hunts, no exposure to humans, and no knowledge of our kind must ever be given to a human." Carlisle said, staring at the small image of himself.

Alex frowned. "You're breaking that law. Twice over."

Carlisle smiled tightly. "And I believe that it is worth it. Twice over. Love and respect should transcend old laws."

Alex was quiet. _Respect_. _Respect for… for the Tribe?_ "You're the best vampire I'll ever meet, huh?" she realised aloud. Carlisle ducked his head but said nothing. They were quiet for another moment, Alex taking out her phone to message Paul again. Finally, she sighed. "I got it from a dream." Carlisle looked faintly surprised. "What's your prognosis, Doc?"

Carlisle shook his head. "I haven't heard of such a phenomena before, even from within my own kind." He frowned. "All I can say, is be careful, Alexandra."

She snorted. "Yeah, you and everyone else. It would be great to know what to be careful _of._"

Carlisle didn't look amused. "We can only hope that it was a dream, a strange coincidence and nothing more. I can assure you, that _neither _of us want the Volturi to make the journey to Washington. I will take it as a warning – I'll keep an eye on the situation."

Alex smiled slightly. "One more thing to add to the to-do list, right?" She thought about Paul and Jared and Sam, and their run-ragged exhaustion because of the recent attacks. She bit her lip, considering. "And have you – I mean, you're aware of the _other_ problem?" Carlisle looked at her curiously, and she fought the urge to flinch away from his unnatural irises. "The not-so animalistic animal attacks. Seattle? The man from Forks?"

"Ah." Carlisle said. "Yes, we are looking into that as well. I'd imagine the reservation is under guard?" Alex said nothing. He smiled slightly. "I see. You can assure Mr. Black that we are doing our part."

Doing their part. Like it was some kind of school project. Like lives weren't on the line. And now this news; that the dream had meaning, that the sigil had meaning.

Alex took a shaky breath. "I think I should go." All of a sudden, she was tired again, and she was craving the deep sleep from her pills.

Carlisle gave her a warm smile. "I'm sorry to have burdened you, Alexandra."

"Just – call me Alex, doc." She sighed. His smile grew, and he opened the door for her. She was too tired to tell him to walk in front of her, even as his noiseless footsteps set her skin crawling. She hurried back through the common room, eyes downcast, practically running for the stairs. She didn't know if she could handle any more interaction.

Of course, Carlisle kept up with her, and he neatly opened the door for her. She had almost made it out, when a familiar voice called her name.

"Alexandra?"

She turned slowly, hoping against hope that she was wrong. But no. There was Bella Swan, perched on the stairs above them, shadowed by another vampire with bronze hair and a puckered expression. "What are you doing here?" Bella asked, a confused smile playing on her face.

"I'm having an affair with the good doctor." Alex deadpanned. Like hell she was telling anyone anymore, _especially_ another human with even less sense than her, apparently.

Bella's smile fell, and the vampire behind her frowned. Alex scowled back. _Love_; the doctor had said, he would break the laws for love. She looked between Bella and the vampire again, taking in the way he was standing protectively over her, in the way she'd seen Paul do to her sister; instinctual, but not intentional. _That was love_. The vampire's gaze sharpened, and deliberately, like he'd heard her thoughts, took a step away from Bella.

The loud honk from Paul's truck made Bella jump, and Alex blinked, breaking her stare down with the vampire. _Asshole_. She thought, and watched in surprise as his scowl deepened. _Okay, weird._ She turned to Carlisle. "Um. Thanks, I guess."

Carlisle inclined his head. "Feel free to drop by the hospital anytime, Alex, if you have questions about your… prescription." He said meaningfully. Paul honked again and she nodded.

"Yeah." She made for the door, Bella and her mystery man following behind. She didn't linger as they said good-bye to Carlisle, but before she got in the truck, she turned. "Bella!" The brunette looked up at her from the silver Volvo. "Be careful." She warned.

What else was there to say? She clearly knew who and what she was with, and yet – Alex couldn't stay silent.

Bella looked uncomfortable, clearly trying to find something to say. Alex didn't draw out the moment anymore, and swung herself into the truck. Paul gave her a long look. "Okay?" He asked her seriously.

"Yeah. Let's go home." She said shortly. Paul nodded wordlessly, and gunned the engine, reversing out of the driveway. The Volvo followed them out, but when they got to the main road, they turned in different directions. Alex watched the car disappear in the rear-view mirror.

"What did he say?" Paul asked quietly, switching on the cool air, as Alex let her head fall back against the seat. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She looked as bad as she felt, and she looked away from the bags under her eyes and out into the forest.

"He said to be careful." She said simply, and closed her eyes. "He said it was a warning."


	8. Mine: Chapter 7

They were treating her like glass.

Whatever lingering irritation they may have had about her disappearing act, and then her weekend of radio silence seemed to have dissipated.

She thought she probably would have preferred them to be annoyed.

Alex wasn't allowed to carry her books anymore; Quil had become her packhorse, Embry had taken to near force-feeding her at lunch; every time she finished a bite of something, more food would find itself onto her plate, and Jacob was acting like her damn babysitter; he'd created an enforced naptime anytime she came round after school.

It was… touching.

In a fucking annoying way.

"How are you feeling?" Quil asked her, for the millionth time since he'd picked her up for school.

Alex took another sip of her diet_, caffeine-free,_ lemon soda. "Peachy." She deadpanned. It was sunny today, and they'd decided to sit outside – though they were all in various stages of regret, due to the ant infestation on the picnic tables. Embry had resorted to squatting on the bench and holding his food above the table. She thought he looked like a crow, or a chicken.

Quil narrowed his eyes at her. "Are you sure?"

Alex set down her can slowly, and stood. "If I wasn't okay, could I do _this?!"_

She leapt at him, bowling him completely off his seat and back onto the grass. He let out a wheezing laugh, and shoved her off. She rolled a few feet before getting back up to jump on him again. Jacob swivelled round in his seat to watch, Embry setting his lunch down nervously. "Get him, Alex!" Jacob whooped, as she and Quil went rolling around again. Quil may have been broader and stronger than her, but she was almost as tall – and definitely more flexible, as she wiggled out from under him, just to jump on him again.

He didn't budge, and managed to stand, staggering slightly, with her full weight on his back. He grunted. "You're so fucking heavy!" he slowly made his way back to the table, Alex locking her arms and legs around him like a koala.

"It's my big brain." She said cheerfully.

Jacob snorted. "You have about three braincells, Alex – and they're all half-functioning because you're trying to go off coffee."

Quil plopped her down on the seat and she released him, spinning to point at Jacob. "Fuck you." He flipped her off cheerfully, and swiped her soda for good measure. She watched him gulp it down mournfully. He crushed it easily with a war-cry of a burp, and tossed it half heartedly towards the trash can near them, Quil leaping up to bat it out of trajectory. Embry gently nudged his own juice over to her placatingly, and she gave him a small smile. "Thanks, Em." She said, taking a sip and handing it back to him. She tilted her face to the sun. "God, it's nice out." She wiggled a little contentedly, but when she opened her eyes, she caught the end of Embry's heavy gaze on her. She thought she'd nipped that one in the bud.

"Y'got that right…" Quil said happily, planting his feet wide and outstretching his arms. "I just want to take my clothes off and run around."

"Quil, you're a filthy exhibitionist." Jacob said, wrinkling his nose. "All you ever want to do is get naked."

"Yeah, Quil – I don't want to go blind!" Alex tore her attention away from Embry in favour of jeering at Quil.

Quil stuck his tongue out at them. "As if… you just don't want to admit that if you looked as good as _me-"_

Jacob, Alex _and_ Embry all drowned him out in a chorus of disgust and denial. Alex laughed at Quil's affronted face, feeling light under the warm sun. It was good. Things were good.

"Alex," Embry's hand on the back of her wrist brought her tumbling back to earth. Scratch that – abort – things were suddenly looking _very_ dire. Embry looked serious and earnest and soft – and Alex panicked. "Can I talk to you?" he asked lowly, trying not to draw the attention of Quil and Jacob, who had begun to arm-wrestle for some reason.

Alex really, _really_, didn't want to have whatever conversation Embry was wanting to have – but she knew she had been hurting his feelings _more_ by avoiding him. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place. In truth; she thought Embry was _great_. Really, really great. Sweet and kind, consideration and confiding. He was handsome too, in a pretty sort of way.

But he was her friend. He _had_ to be her friend.

"Um." She said eloquently, casting Dumb and Dumber another look, wishing they weren't so obtuse. Embry employed full use of his puppy dog eyes, and she faltered. "Okay." She said hesitantly.

His hand on her wrist pulled her up, and she stood obediently. _Oh god, this was serious, serious._ She thought with mild panic. Jacob looked up as she stood, but it was too little too late as Embry walked her a little way from the picnic table. _If they had been wolves_, she thought wildly, _they would still be in earshot. _

Embry looked even more nervous than she felt. He was still her friend, even if it was a weird situation, and her heart went out to him. She took his hand, and he grasped onto it like a lifeline. "Sorry." He mumbled. "I just- I wanted to ask you. Before someone else does."

Alex blinked. "Ask me?" she tilted her head curiously.

"To prom." He said.

"To prom?" She repeated.

This wasn't going at _all_ like she thought it would. He nodded, ducking his head for a moment before looking back at her with a resolved glint in his eyes. "Look, Alex – I know… I know I probably made you super freaked out with, like, _liking_ you," he began, and even as she began to protest awkwardly and automatically, he grinned a little sheepishly. "I _did,_ I could tell. You have a pretty serious cold shoulder."

She winced. "I'm sorry, Em. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings."

He shrugged good-naturedly, as he did all things. "It's fine – but you could make it up to me and come to the dance?" he asked a little wheedlingly, and she raised an eyebrow. He laughed. "Worth a shot." He cleared his throat. "Will- will you come anyway?" he asked, looking at her through his lashes.

Alex took a deep breath. "Embry, I don't want you to get the wrong idea. I don't want to ruin our friendship." She stressed.

Embry took her hand again. "What if it doesn't get ruined?" he asked gently. "Look – Alex, you've been driving me crazy. I just want to be near you, be _with_ you. I don't know what it is…" he looked at her, almost in confusion himself, and she laughed nervously.

"Gee, thanks. Really know how to get a gal going, Em."

He shook his head, blushing. "No! No – that's not what I mean! I just… I just want to go to the dance with you. No pressure. Just know that I like you, and if – if you have a good time, and maybe wanted to do it again… I'd be down."

Alex raised an eyebrow, unable to help herself. "Go to another dance?"

He scowled at her playfully. "You're an ass, Alex. You know what I mean. Like, another date."

Alex couldn't deny the way her stomach flipped. God, she was just a _little_ pathetic wasn't she? First cute boy that pays her proper attention and she's all giddy. But she couldn't deny… the feeling of being… wanted, _liked_… it felt nice. And Embry was comfortable. She could – _maybe_… God, she couldn't believe she was saying it, _maybe_ – picture herself liking him too.

She bit at her lip, worrying at a piece of dry skin, and mulling over her answer. _She couldn't believe she was saying; _"Yes. Yes, Em, I'll go with you." He smiled, a full, sun-lit, warm and bright beam – and he squeezed her hand. She poked his chest. "But just yes to the _dance_, okay? We'll… we'll just see."

Embry nodded, still grinning like a madman. Part of her felt very, _very_ guilty. Wasn't she just playing with his feelings like this? But no – she still _adored_ Embry. Just not like he seemed to like her. Right now, at least. She could like Embry.

She let him lead her back over to the other two, feeling Jacob's burning stare on her face, and hoping her turmoil wasn't showing. Embry cast her another brilliant smile over his shoulder, and she pulled herself up a little.

_Yeah, she could like Embry._

* * *

"I think it looks… um, lovely."

Kitty looked slightly pained, fingers worrying at her small silver pendant at her neck, trying to muster a smile.

"It looks horrible." Paul piped up helpfully, grinning unapologetically as Kitty slapped him lightly. "Sorry, Big A."

Alex dropped her awkward pose in front of the mirror of the tiny dress boutique that her sister, Kim, Emily – and by unfortunate extension – the Pack, had somehow managed to squeeze into. Alex wasn't sure if the shop assistants were about to start drooling, or faint in horror as Paul, Jared and Sam shouldered their way through the door; Jared only werewolf-reflexes away from destroying a side table and pretty vase. Alex really, _really_ wished she had taken up her mother's offer to take her dress shopping, but one look at her mother's stressed smile, and Kitty's envious pout made her reluctantly let her elder sister lead the expedition. Her mother and father were busy these days, as their work began to evolve, the grocery chain that her father managed beginning to spread.

So, letting Kitty take charge had been a little bit of a no brainer, even if she really wanted to dissolve into nothing. Of course, she hadn't said no to Kim and Emily coming along – because, she didn't know, wasn't this, like, a super girly bonding thing, or whatever? – but then Paul had pulled up to her house with a shit eating grin, and somehow Jared caught wind of the _hilarious_ situation, and then Sam had decided, _again, _he couldn't bare spending his one day off apart from Emily. Her humiliation just seemed to be a bonus for the three men who were oddly at ease in the tiny shop.

She suspected her facial expressions were entertainment enough for them.

At least the Three Stooges weren't here to see it. She scowled at the thought of them, because it was _their_ fault, she was in this mess in the first place. Well, Embry's fault at least – and Quil had been annoyingly vocal about her needing to get a new dress for the occasion.

"Nothing looks good!" She whined, wriggling unhappily in the flouncing layers of pink tulle on her skin. "And everything itches!"

Paul and Jared shook with silent laughter, as Emily and Kim cooed in sympathy. "It's alright, honey, we'll find something." Emily said soothingly. "We won't let you look anything less than stunning for Embry."

Alex's temper flared again, and she stomped her foot in the ill-fitting heels that she had put on to try the dress. "Embry can _die_. The time I dress to please a boy is the time I will ask Paul to run me over in his Tonka Truck." Paul made a half-indignant, half-amused noise, which she ignored. "I want to be comfortable for _me_."

Emily laughed. "Of course, Alex. Sorry, baby. We'll find something you can kick Embry's ass in, huh?" Alex couldn't help but smile slightly.

Jared folded his arms, absently threatening, and levelled her with a serious look that looked out of place on his jovial face. "You'll let us know if Embry's ass needs to be kicked, okay?" The very solemn look on all of their faces just made her flush.

Alex whined again, running her hands over her face in horror and embarrassment. "You _guys!"_

Sam chuckled, breaking his gaze and slapping Jared's back in solidarity and mild chastisement. Despite the loud sound, and the strength that was no doubt behind it, Jared didn't even flinch. "Alex knows how to handle herself." He said placatingly, but there was a faint edge to his voice that Alex wasn't sure if she found endearing or annoying.

She stomped back into the changing room. "You _know_ Embry wouldn't hurt a fly – and besides, he's just a human. I can handle a human." She said, dropping the dress carelessly to the ground.

"You better not have just put that on the ground!" Kitty called out, eerily accurate. Alex rolled her eyes, but picked it up anyway, and put it on the hanger. "There's only two more, okay? I think you'll like them."

"I feel like I've tried on the whole shop!" Alex said mulishly, half-way into her sweater, pulling it off again.

"Tell me about it…" Paul muttered, obviously loud enough to hear. She listened to what she assumed was her sister, slap him again.

"No one asked you to come, asshat." She told him, as two garment bags were slung over the door. Paul laughed his annoying laugh, but mercifully remained from commenting further. Alex sighed, but turned her attention to the last two dresses. She unzipped the bags of them both, eyeing the lurid purple of the left in distaste and dismissal, before turning her attention to the other.

Already, she was interested, the dark green colour of the satin much subtler than any of the other monstrosities she'd put on her body. The way it moved in the light reminded her oddly of the way the deepest parts of the forest looked in the dappling of sunlight; the moss and bracken, the deep healthy greens of the tallest trees, the feeling of peace there. She ran her fingers over the hem, noting the cool feeling of the fabric. It was longer than the other dresses she'd tried on, the beading at her waist detailed and thoughtful, more for structural integrity of the zipper rather than any unnecessary decoration.

She pulled it up over her body, liking the way it fit snug under her arms, the strapless bodice leaving her arms free, just the way she liked them. She wasn't particularly…_busty_, but it felt secure enough to stay put as she put on the heels again. The dress fell straight, but as she wasn't trying to hide or define any curves she didn't have, she thought it felt kind of… elegant, in the way it clung to her waist and fell over her body everywhere else. She cleared her throat.

"Um. Okay. I'm coming out."

She stepped out of the changing room with her hands on her hips, ready for more ridicule. But it didn't come, and she began to feel a little dumb, braced for combat.

"Oh, Alex." Kitty said, clasping her hands over her mouth. "It's _gorgeous._"

"Yeah?" Alex asked a little uncertainly, dropping her hands. Kim was smiling wide, Emily resting her head on Sam's shoulder and looking fond.

Paul sat up. "Please. _Please_ say you like this one."

Alex raised an eyebrow, "I like this one."

They cheered, and she felt her stomach warm with small joy, unable to keep from smiling. She felt good. The girls descended upon her, and she felt giant, towering over them in the heels. Emily was already tugging at the bodice. "How's this? Is it too tight? Does it feel like it'll slide down if you raise your arms?"

Kitty pushed her arms up, making Alex squawk. "Hey!" Her sister smiled at her, letting her arms go.

"We can put in sticky pads to keep it from slipping." Emily said to Kitty and Kim.

Kim patted Alex, "And I've got shoes for you, so don't worry about shoe shopping." Alex's relief must have shown on her face, because they laughed at her, and patted her into the change room.

"You _really_ better not drop that one!" Kitty called after her.

"Yeah, yeah!"

They bagged the dress up quickly, and headed to the register, where Kitty and Paul squabbled over payment, before Sam gave the cashier his card with a sigh. Alex opened her mouth to protest, but Sam's hand came down heavily on her head, ruffling her hair. "Don't worry about it, Alex." He smiled. "Just think about it as your Christmas present."

She grinned, shaking her hair back into place as Emily took control of the bag, pretending she didn't see Kitty grab a pair of earrings. As _if_ she was wearing earrings. "Thanks, Popeye."

He growled lowly, playfully. "Watch it."

Then, much to the sales assistants obvious relief, they all squeezed out of the shop again, and headed for Sam and Emily's, where Alex spent the next couple of hours being subjected to dress-up. But she didn't mind so much, not with the warm bubble of excitement in her gut, and surrounded by Pack. By family.


	9. Mine: Chapter 8

Alex was, irrationally, wholly, madly _nervous_.

And she didn't know why! It wasn't like she was about to make a speech, or skydive, or something crazy like that. It was Embry, her dorky best-friend Embry. And besides, Jacob and Quil would be with them, and Quil's date.

Still. She was nervous.

She flattened her shaky hands over her skirt, giving her reflection another once over. Turned out, Kim was very, _very_ adept at makeup. Alex wouldn't go so far as to say she didn't recognise herself, but Kim had definitely managed to highlight her face in a way that was just different enough to bump her confidence up.

"Okay. Its just a dance." She told her reflection sternly, "it's just Embry."

"_Alex? Your date is here!"_

Her mom's voice was just excited enough that Alex resisted the urge to yell back to say that it wasn't a date. Whatever. She sighed, and picked up the white purse that Kitty had given her, even though she was only bringing her phone and some cash so they could get ice cream afterwards. It was part of the look, apparently.

She walked very slowly out of her room, partly to prolong the moment before she had to pose for photos and partly because she was still incredibly wobbly in heels. Like some kind of ungainly foal, she made her slow descent downstairs, so focussed on putting one foot in front of the other, that it was only the faint intake of breath and the sound of camera shutter clicking that made her realise she was being watched.

She startled at all the eyes on her, her whole family and Paul assembled in front of the door, and Embry – staring like he'd seen a ghost – at the foot of the stairs. She smiled awkwardly. "Yo."

"Y-you look…" Embry stuttered slightly, and she raised an eyebrow. "Really beautiful." He finished, blinking.

"You too." She told him, meaning it. He looked older in his suit, and he'd pushed his hair off his forehead, and it was a wonder she ever underestimated his intense eyes before.

"Oh, you two are adorable." Her mother trilled, and raised the little camera again. "Smile!"

"Hold her hand, Embry." Her father prompter gruffly, crossing his arms and failing to look delighted.

Embry turned to her, and offered his hand. She took it, leaning on him to make the last few steps easier. He smiled at her, "Wow, you're so graceful."

"Shut up, Em." She told him, trying to muster a scowl. He just chuckled, and smoothly intertwined their fingers as her mother clicked away on the camera.

"Okay, just a few more…" her mother muttered. Alex had to remind herself that this was the first time that their mother had the experience. Kitty and Paul had ended up skipping their own senior prom, and before that, Topher and Kitty weren't exactly in a position to be going to the dance. But still, she didn't know how much longer she could smile.

"Mom – we gotta go!" She looked to Embry for backup, raising her brows.

"Oh – yeah, sorry Mrs. Faye, Jacob, Quil and Maya are waiting in the car." He said apologetically.

"Now, you two, we need to have a talk about safe fun, and-"

Both Embry and Alex blanched at her father's stern voice, and as Paul snickered quietly, Alex mde her escape. "Sorry! We're going!"

She dragged Embry as fast as she could towards the door, tugging on his hand. He followed her, trying to hide his laughter. When they made it to the porch, Alex slamming the door behind her, he began to cackle. She slapped him. "Em_bry_!" she whined. "That was so embarrassing."

"There you guys are, Quil's, like, fighting with his date and it's getting super awkward in there- Oh." Alex turned at the sound of Jacob's voice, taking in his faint scowl in confusion.

"Hey, Jake." She said a little uncertainly.

"Hi." He said shortly, before he turned to Embry. "We've got to go."

She frowned. _Weirdo._

Embry looked between the pair of them, but nodded. "Okay, sure, dude. Ready, my lady?" he asked with a shit eating grin, holding out his arm for her. She scowled at him, but wound her fingers around his bicep, trying to ignore the firmness of it, and let him help her down the few stairs to the uneven walkway.

The drive there was _incredibly_ awkward. Jacob was weirdly quiet, and true to his word, Quil and his date were silent apart from the occasional snide comment towards each other. Embry seemed unwilling to attempt to break the tense atmosphere, and Alex wasn't exactly itching to speak either. When they arrived at the venue, Jacob waited until they were all out of the car, and then gunned the engine with a muttered; "_I'll be back later."_ And disappeared down the road.

Alex stared after him. "What's up his ass?" she asked aloud.

Embry joined her, his shoulder brushing hers. "No clue. He was fine on the way to yours."

Alex rolled her eyes, nudging at him. "Yeah, cause that makes me feel so much better."

"Never claimed to be a therapist!" Embry said cheerfully, and put a careful hand around her shoulders. Alex twitched a little, her cheeks heating involuntarily. _It was just Embry._ She reminded herself, and turned in his loose touch. He smiled at her, and in her heels, she was just a little taller than him. It did, oddly, make her feel a little better. "C'mon. I want to dance with my date." He said, and flourished his hand in the direction of the entrance. She laughed at his dorky gesture. _It was just Embry._

She had to give it to the Dance Committee, they had really done up the old community hall. The theme had been – rather unoriginally – 'Fall', but the multitudes of fairy-lights and the delicate paper cut-outs of leaves transformed the space. They'd even managed to procure semi-realistic trees. The room smelt like pumpkin-spice, and Alex's mouth watered at the display of the flavoured cookies on the food table. She had a secret weakness for the artificial sweet flavour, and foresaw herself leaving the dance however many pounds the cookies were, heavier.

When she looked to Embry, she found him already watching her. "Pretty sweet, huh?" he said quietly.

She nodded, unable to keep from smiling. "I'm gonna need some assistance to the dessert table before I hit the floor, partner."

Embry groaned. "God, you're perfect." Alex ducked her head, struck silent at the reminder of his crush hanging over them. It was simple, however, to fall back into the easy rapport they usually had; as they watched Quil and his date getting into it in the middle of the dancefloor, laughing through mouthfuls of cookies, and in Embry's case, chocolate strawberries. As a gentle guitar-driven song began to filter through the speakers, Embry turned to her, face serious. "Did you want to dance?" Alex nodded mutely, and he took her hands – leading her to join the other couples beginning to converge on the dancefloor. They stepped closer to each other awkwardly, and at a loss, Alex nervously put her hands around his neck. Embry coughed, suddenly looking flustered. "Is this okay?" he asked, hands just barely skimming over her hips.

"Y-yeah…" she mumbled, and they both looked away from each other as Embry settled his hands on the dip of her waist. It took a moment, before they managed to find a slow sway that matched them, Alex not daring anything fancy in her heels, Embry seemingly frozen in place.

Alex swallowed as Embry's grip shifted slightly, fingers splaying a little more on her lower back. She felt _really_ nervous again. She wasn't used to being so close to someone like this; body slamming Embry during playful wrestling was hardly comparable to slow dancing against him. Eventually though, her blush settled down, and whatever cartwheeling her stomach had decided to perform had slowed to the occasional flip whenever her chest brushed his.

Now, she felt comfortable enough to smile to herself as she realised what the smudge on his mouth was. "What?" Embry asked her, eyes curious, smiling with her.

"You've got chocolate on your face, you toddler." She told him. He let go of her with one hand, and rubbed at his mouth with the back of his hand, and completely missed.

"Got it?"

"No. _No_ – you missed again. Here, just let me-"

It was only as she was swiping her thumb over his bottom lip, as the heat of his surprised breath brushed over her knuckle, and his eyes went wide – did she realise what a suggestive gesture it had been. She slowly released his jaw from her soft grip and grimaced. "Sorry."

"No, it's – it's okay." He said, blinking at her. "Totally okay."

She sighed. "Sorry – I feel like I'm being super weird today." At Embry's dismissive noise, she shook her head, "You just make me nervous."

Embry looked pleased. "That's a good thing."

"How?" Alex narrowed her eyes.

Embry shrugged. "Means I'm doing something right. I mean-" he looked suddenly concerned, "Not like, _bad_ nervous, right?"

Alex grinned, "No. Not bad nervous." At that, Embry's smile grew wide.

* * *

Embry walked her to her house, holding her little purse, and the plastic plate of cookies they'd smuggled out. "Well." He said when they reached her door. "This is goodnight then."

Alex leant against her door, searching his face. He looked happy. "Goodnight, Embry." She said, raising an eyebrow, and held her position, expectant.

He hesitated. "So, um, did you – did you have a good time."

Alex had been thinking about it all during the just-as-uncomfortable drive to hers. They'd at least been spared from Maya and Quil's arguing, as the girl had gotten a ride home with one of her friends. Jacob had been just as mute, and after he'd skulked into the dance much later, without so much as a greeting, Alex hadn't wanted to play polite. He was _obviously_ mad about something, but if he couldn't be mature and tell her what she'd done, then that was on him.

In spite of all that, the fact was, she had really had _a nice time_. She'd felt pretty and wanted, and she'd had a blast with Embry. He'd been himself, if a little anxious – which, how could she blame him? She had been too – and hadn't really made it weird at all.

She smiled at him. "I did, Em, thank you."

"No – thank you." He said. "Have you, uh – I mean, _would_ you-"

Alex decided to spare him the discomfort, and reached out to touch his hand. "I'd like to go out again sometime."

"Like a date?" he asked, hopefully.

Alex took a deep breath, steeling herself. _She couldn't believe she was doing this._ "Like a date." She confirmed.

Embry let out a little puff of air, like he'd been punched. "Oh. Wow."

Alex bit her lip, gathering courage – and leant forwards to kiss him quickly on the cheek. Her own cheeks reddened ridiculously, and as he gaped at her, she made a hasty retreat. "Night, Embry! I'll see you at school!"

She slammed the door shut behind herself, and pressed her hands to her face, unable to restrain the giggle that bubbled forth. Oh god, she was _totally_ like those rom-com girls with a crush. All giddy and stupid. She laughed at herself again, and kicked off her heels.


	10. Mine: Chapter 9

"You're in a good mood."

Alex looked over at her brother. Topher was watching her over his bowl of cereal, smiling. The kitchen was light, despite the ever present cold, a bit of sunlight illuminating the room. Alex had plans to go hiking, despite the temperature, and had gotten up early to eat, managing to catch Topher before his soccer game.

She shrugged, ducking her head to take a large bite of toast. "So what?" she asked through her mouthful, spraying crumbs on the table.

Topher grinned at her. "It's nice. I don't know, I just feel like you're always so _angry_."

Alex rolled her eyes, not really feeling like getting into the inner-workings of her emotional state on a Sunday morning. "Maybe you're just annoying." She told him, crunching down again.

Topher snorted. "Maybe." He lifted the bowl to his lips, with just as little care for manners as her, and slurped down the remains of his meal. "Anyway, wish me luck – I'm going to go and hopefully destroy the Forks dropkicks."

"Good luck, loser." Alex nodded to him as he waved her goodbye, dumping his bowl noisily in the sink, and leaving out the back.

She hadn't really spoken to Topher much, like, as a whole – since they'd moved here. She wondered idly if he was ever lonely; because with Kitty occupied with Paul and the Pack, Topher had essentially lost his confidant. Not that Alex had ever been close to her eldest sibling, but since coming to Forks, she could definitely feel more of a distance between them. Especially since she'd come to learn about the Pack, which outsiders weren't supposed to know about.

She could still picture the horror on her sister's face, Paul's frantic apologies, Sam's solemn promise of silence.

Alex hadn't _meant_ to spy on her sister and Paul – but she'd always been a _little_ suspicious of their whole relationship, what with the sudden turnaround from Paul terrorizing her sister to chasing after her with his annoying puppy-dog eyes. And come _on_, she would have to have been blind, deaf and stupid to not notice the weird cult like status that Sam, Paul and Jared held within the elder generations, as well as the creepily intense way Paul had responded to her little warning speech about protecting her sister. And look – they were all bulked like a roided-up bodybuilder, and all well over six-feet-tall which was just unusual. She had known _something_ was different about them.

When her sister had started acting secretive too – and practically began to live at Emily and Sam's house, she had grown even more suspicious. So, one night when she couldn't sleep, and happened to hear the sound of Paul and Kitty talking in the backyard, she'd stuck her head out of the window – and happened to catch Paul right as he transformed.

She was ashamed to admit that she had vomited at the unnatural sight, gagging into her wastecan, before she had run down stairs, up in arms – because despite seeing it with her own eyes, she couldn't separate big fluff-ball Paul from the terrifyingly huge _wolf_ – and had attempted to rescue her sister. But, she'd sworn them to secrecy – blackmailing Paul with withholding from Sam that Paul had transformed in their _backyard_, claiming she'd followed him into the forest instead.

So, no, her discovery of the Tribe's secret was not her proudest moment.

But she couldn't bring herself to regret knowing – even if it put a strain on her relationship with her parents, her brother, her best friends. Even if knowing meant she was drawn into danger.

Alex, once upon a time, may have left the house alone a little paranoid, watchful for danger – but now, whilst she looked over her shoulder once in a while, it was with the macabre knowledge that if _something_ really wanted her dead, no pepper-spray or self-defence could help her. And besides, the Pack were pretty good at their job.

So, as she headed out into the _very_ crisp morning, it was armed only with her cell phone shoved into her bra, and the thought of escapade. She liked hiking, and she had the bonus of the forest to look forward to, every new path a new adventure. She crunched over the crisp leaves, and ducked into the canopy at the end of her street, heading away from the beach, and towards Forks.

The air was still heavy with the scent of the forest, green and fresh, but with the cold edge of the winter masking the usual wet scent of the loam. Still, the cool wind smelt faintly of the ocean, and the promise of the warmer months and she pulled her hood down to feel it blow through her hair and chill the back of her neck. The majority of Washington's forests were made up of evergreen trees, so there weren't many leaves on the ground but there was an obvious lack of the multitude of blooms that usually coloured the undergrowth and boughs of the trees in the warmer months. Soon though, as the Summer holidays came around, the flowers would bloom again. She couldn't wait.

She tramped over moss, stone and grass alike, heading forwards but in no real direction – at a pace fast enough to get her heart beating and her breathing quickening, a light sheen of sweat making her unzip her hoodie and tie it around her waist. The going got a little harder after that, and she began to regret her decision to forgo stretching before leaving. She'd just have to have a proper cooldown when she took a rest.

She hit a trail, and followed it aimlessly, coming out onto a main road, and a strip of shops. She'd hit Forks. A pair of runners passed her with a wave, and she nodded to them, lifting her arms above her head to stretch out the stitch she'd developed, and began a slow walk towards the diner. She could go for another meal.

"Hi! Welcome!" she was greeted cheerfully by the woman standing behind the counter, and she smiled awkwardly in response to the bright tone. "How can I help you?"

"Could I grab some breakfast?" Alex asked, eyeing the half-full seating area hopefully. The woman nodded.

"Of course, honey, take a seat wherever and I'll be right over."

"Thanks." Alex made her way to one of the unoccupied window seats, and sat facing the forest. She ordered a stack of pancakes, and drowned them in maple syrup. Afterwards, she made the unfortunate mistake of exploring Forks. Really, Alex should have just gone back home, and enjoyed her Sunday. Because of _course_, she would run into the last _people_ she ever, ever, _ever_ wanted to run into.

She'd been walking down Main Street, towards what she thought looked like an ice-cream shop, when a voice – too smooth and sweet to be normal – called out her _name_. Like her full name.

"Alexandra! Alexandra Faye!"

She swivelled in place, to meet the excited smile of a tiny, pixie-looking woman, holding onto the arm of a tall, handsome blond man who looked like he had bad gas. And of _course_ he was handsome. They were _vampires_. She had to fight the urge to scream as she took in their yellow irises.

"H-how do you know my name?" she tried to sound intimidating, but the faint stutter must have given her away as the little one's smile fell slightly.

"We met, remember? You were at my house." She said, and Alex was sure she wasn't imagining the faint put-out whine to her voice.

"Uh – yeah, I don't think we met." She said, trying to remember their faces. Nope – all she remembered was feeling very, very scared and wanting to hightail it out of there. Being presented with a room full of your natural predator tended to do that a girl.

"But-"

"Alice." The man spoke for the first time, gently reprimanding. She decided she liked him the best so far. "My apologies, Alexandra. We didn't mean to derail your day. Alice was just… excited to see you. Again."

Alex couldn't help but bark a laugh. "Wow, you guys must _really_ have no friends if you're excited to see me." The man and Alice exchanged a look, speaking without saying anything. It was so like the way Sam looked at Emily, or Paul looked at Kitty, that she rolled her eyes. _God, what was it with supernatural beings and grossly passionate romance? _

"My name is Jasper." The man supplied suddenly. His stare was really intense.

Alex blinked. "Um. Cool." The air seemed to lighten suddenly, and she felt relaxed. _What had she been freaked out about anyway? Wasn't like they could eat her in public._ She squinted at Alice's designer handbag. "You guys are rich, right?"

"You could say that." Alice said with a tinkling laugh that grated a little on her ears.

Alex turned back to the ice-cream shop; mind made up. "Well, it's your lucky day. You get to buy me ice-cream." She told them, gesturing them towards the shop. They made no complaint, gliding towards the shop, still arm in arm. Alex almost shuddered at their unnatural grace, before she followed them.

It was only when she was half-way through her sundae, did the state of relaxation she was in begin to rankle a little strangely. What was she doing? What was _wrong_ with her? Why was she eating ice-cream with the enemy?

Alex stiffened, dropping her spoon noisily into her dish, making the pair of them look at her sharply. She slowly stood. "What did you do to me?" she asked lowly, putting a hand to her gut, as _whatever_ hold was on her fell away to nausea.

Jasper's eyes widened a fraction. "I was just…easing the mood."

"What the fuck?" She cried, taking a large step back, and making the bored looking server look up.

Alice looked nervous. "Alex, we're very sorry, we just wanted to make you comfortable."

Alex swallowed, looking towards the exit. _What the fuck_. "You're telling me you guys _hypnotized _me?" What were the odds she could make it to the woods before they caught her? What were the odds that the Pack were even in the area?

"No! No – Jasper didn't hypnotise you." Alice whispered, looking at the server. He'd turned back to idly readjusting the menus. "Alex, if you sit down, we'll explain."

"I should run." Alex said, looking back to the trees. "I should run and never come back. I shouldn't have come here at _all_."

"Alex, please." Alice wheedled.

Alex shook her head. "Tell me why you, you… you _influenced_ me, or whatever."

Jasper looked uncomfortable. Alice clasped her hands in her lap, and looked upset. "I saw us becoming…uh, friends." Alex narrowed her eyes.

"What, because you can see the future, or something?" she asked snidely.

Alice and Jasper exchanged a look. "Well, yes, actually." She looked suddenly curious. "How much do you actually know about us?"

"Enough to bring a blowtorch next time I have to step foot in this stupid town." She snapped.

"Would you like to know more?" Jasper offered. Alex chewed on her bottom lip, shifting. _She should just go._ But a part of her knew that the more she knew about the enemy, the better, and an even bigger part of her was just _curious._

She nodded once, and slowly took her seat again. "Talk then."

* * *

Alex didn't know whether or not she should tell Sam what had happened.

She felt so _stupid_. And now, alone in her room, with the adrenaline fading from her mad dash home – she felt afraid too. What if it hadn't been one of the Cullens she had encountered? What if one of them had lost control?

Alex ducked into the bathroom, and met her own eyes in the mirror. She was red-faced still, hair damp with rain and sweat. She looked thin, breakable. _Vulnerable_. With a faint tremble of her bottom lip, she turned away, slamming on the hot water and ducking into the steaming spray of the shower. She put herself to bed early; in the process, forgoing dinner, an episode of Miami Vice, and accidentally, _foolishly_, her sleep-prescription.

* * *

_She'd been here before. _

_Though the forest was vast and everchanging, this particular clearing was familiar. She knew it, knew it like she knew the red-painted house that she could see ahead through the tree line. The Black's house had been blue once, though how she knew that, she wasn't sure._

_What was different about the view this time, was how far off the ground she seemed to be. She was tall, she'd always been tall, but she wasn't this big. She had a strange awareness of her size, now that she was thinking about it – and it was an odd feeling, like the strength that was coiling in her every limb, untapped and ready. _

_The sun was going down, and as she stepped forwards out of the tree line, she caught a horrifying image of her hands. They were not her hands – and in fact, they were not hands at all. _

_She was not herself._

_She was a wolf. _

_"Paul! What are you doing, man?"_

_Her head jerked up, eyes locking onto the clear figure of a man she should not have been able to see in Billy's window, saying words she should not have been able to hear so far away. _

_"Unphase, dude, not cool. What if Jacob was here?" Jared's voice registered in her ears._

**_But he wasn't_**_ – and she wasn't sure if that had been her thought or – **he's never home on a Sunday night, that's why we meet on a Sunday night. Asshole.** _

_The voice in her head was not her own; though she was not surprised. She was calm. Calm in a way that she had never been in these vivid dreams. Though, the faint pit of anger that was simmering deep within her was apparent, but somehow not hers. _

_Then her world was shifting, shrinking, enlarging, bones shifting and cracking painfully, muscles shrinking and deforming, body transforming in brief agony that she **just had to endure**._

_"Hurry up, dickhead! Sam's got news about those bloodsuckers. Apparently the Cullens took care of 'em." _

_She rolled her eyes. **The Cullens were a bunch of freaks.** _

_Then, she looked down at herself to pull on a pair of shorts – and took in the view of a very naked man that she had accidentally seen before. PAUL! _

**_What-_**

* * *

Alex woke up with a horrified shriek dying in her throat.

_Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god-_

She had totally just dreamt about her sister's boyfriend. NAKED.

"What the fuck is _wrong _with me?" she whined into her dark room. _What was going on? Should she tell Kitty? Oh god – what if Kitty thought she liked Paul?_ Alex gagged aloud. "Ew. No." she said. "I'll throw myself off a cliff."

Saying it aloud made her feel a little better. She had _not_ been dreaming about him… naked… on purpose. _Absolutely not. Ew. Disgusting._ She had caught him transforming before, and had inadvertently caught a glimpse then – but _god_, did she wish she could bleach her brain. She must have been… remembering. Or something. Her brain had a _shitty_ sense of imagination. Of all the things to vividly picture in her sleep; _that_ was the last thing she had wanted.

She rolled over, and buried her head in her pillow, groaning out her misery and misfortune.

That was it: she was officially giving up on sleep again.


	11. Mine: Chapter 10

Despite all her fears about what the tentative acceptance of Embry's affections would do to their friendship group, it seemed that not much would really change.

That Monday after the dance, she'd been picked up for school in silence, and then finally – because he obviously couldn't contain himself anymore – Quil had turned around and asked them loudly if they were going out. Embry had flushed and stuttered, and Alex had shrugged and said that they'll see how it goes, took Embry's hand, and ignored Quil's gasp. And that that had been that.

Well.

Jacob was acting a _little_ strange, but so was Quil – so maybe it wasn't completely normal, but _whatever_.

Turns out it was possible to date your best friend.

The summer holidays were jampacked for all of them, Quil picking up a job at the ice-cream parlour in town, and despite her heebie-jeebies (because, _yes_, she was still scarred by her unfortunate encounter with Alice and Jasper Cullen, and, _no_, she would not be dealing with it anytime soon.) it became another spot for them to hang-out, as Jacob's garage became increasingly more full of car parts, and until he began to actually _construct_ the damn thing, there was no room for them to sit.

They ended up at the beach more often than not, and that day happened to be no different to any other.

Alex sat back on her board, watching Quil coast the wave to shore – bursting into loud laughter as he wiped spectacularly. He surfaced spluttering, and caught sight of her hysterics. "Yo! Fuck you, Alex!" he yelled to her, scrambling back up on his board.

She beamed at him cheerfully – before she caught sight of people filing down onto the sand. She squinted, lifting a hand to try and see through the glare off of the water. She didn't have to try very hard to make out the huge figures that could only have been Paul, Sam and Jared, and at the sight of Billy's chair in Sam's grip, realised that it must have been a bonfire night.

Embry and Jacob had already stood up, and were greeting whoever was closest. She wet her hands, and slicked back her hair, debating whether or not she should head back in. The sight of her sister, and Quil's determined paddling back towards her made up her mind. It was cool. She could stay out here, Kitty could be polite on her behalf.

"I'll let you have this next one." Quil said graciously, eyes still red. She levelled a laughing smirk at him.

"You sure? I mean, if you want to – I'd be happy to let the master go again."

"Shut up." He splashed at her, and she laughed.

"I am but your lowly disciple- _agh_!" he managed to get water into her open mouth and she choked around the mouthful. He simpered at her, splashing at her again as she turned to line up her board. "Be careful, or we'll have to fight." She warned him.

He rolled his eyes, and raised his arms to flex aggressively at her. "But I'd just crush you." He told her mock-sadly.

Alex rested her eyes on the swell gathering behind them. "Like you crushed that beginner's wave?" she shot back, ignoring his annoyed whine as she began to paddle with the wave.

It felt a little like flying, when she really got going, and when she lifted her arms, she wasn't so much balancing as pretending she had wings. She leant into the curl of the wave, feeling the momentum slow as she got closer to shore.

She tipped over, letting herself fall gently off the board as she drew closer. When she resurfaced, Quil was surfing towards her, and Jacob was with his father, leaving Embry standing awkwardly with their belongings as the rest of the Tribe set up a grill and the bonfire a little ways down the beach. She sighed. _What kind of girlfriend would she be if she just left him to flounder? _

She waded back to shore, stooping to pick up her board, and jogging towards Embry, who looked relieved to see her. "Hey." He called, and lifted her towel. "Your sister wanted to know if you were staying."

Alex gratefully dropped her board, and wrapped herself in her towel. What she wouldn't give to live in LA, where summer nights _stayed_ warm. Out of the water, the wind was cool, and it made goose bumps rise on her skin. Embry took a step closer, and raised his arms. She stepped into his embrace, and he rubbed her back. "Did you wanna stay?" she asked him, and felt him shiver as her breath hit his neck.

"I don't mind." He said easily, resorting to hugging her instead. "What do you want?"

She groaned. "You choose! I've got so much saltwater in me, it's clogging my brain."

"I think that might just be your lack of braincells." He told her fondly, and without thinking, she snapped at him, biting him lightly on the junction between his shoulder and throat. "Ow!"

"Oh, kinky!" Quil said loudly from behind them. He stood there dripping for a moment, before shaking his head and spraying them with water.

"Quil!" Alex growled. "Use a towel like a normal person."

Quil waggled his eyebrows. "Can't I just share with you two?"

"Don't be nasty, man." Embry sighed, releasing Alex to throw Quil's towel at him. "I don't mind staying, I think it means free food."

Quil perked up. "Oh, yeah! I love Mrs. Clearwater's hot-dogs." He said, turning to sniff at the air, despite the lack of fire, or hot-dogs.

"Dude, I think they're just from the supermarket." Alex said, wrinkling her nose at him.

"Yeah, but, they're so _good_." Quil sighed dreamily. Embry and Alex exchanged a look, snorting at their friend. Alex's heart did a happy little flip when Embry reached for her hand, and she took it, letting him tug her closer again. "You guys are so gross." Quil told them seriously.

Alex flipped him off, before catching sight of her sister waving them over from where she was standing behind the large plastic picnic table already sagging under the weight of all the food. "Remind me to kick your ass later." She said to Quil, kicking out at him as she fell into step with him. He dodged her lazy attempt, and jabbed at her in retaliation. Embry sighed, and twirled her around, putting himself between her and Quil before they could engage in a full-out fight.

"Do you want me to hold your hand too, Quil?" he asked, making Quil sputter in outrage and Alex laugh.

She took Embry with her, weaving through the crowd around the bonfire, that a few men were still struggling to light. "Hey guys!" Kitty trilled as they reached her, smiling at them as her hands moved quickly over the multitudes of plastic wrapped containers. "Don't you two just look adorable."

Alex dropped Embry's hand with a scowl. "Don't be weird, Kitty." She said, crossing her arms. Embry masked his chuckle as a cough as she rounded on him.

"Sorry, sorry!" Her sister said, though the mischievous twinkle in her eyes did not look apologetic at all. "Young love! Just gets me excited!"

Alex choked on nothing. The 'L' word. Nothing more terrifying than _that._ Besides, her and Embry hadn't even…_kissed_ yet. Not that she didn't _want_ to, but it never seemed to be the right time, and it wasn't like she was touch-starved or anything. They held hands, and cuddled, and like, she'd kissed him on the cheek a few times. But never… _that_. "We're leaving!" She squeaked, turning in place to shove at an equally flustered Embry.

They beat a hasty retreat to one of the driftwood logs serving as seats around the bonfire, collapsed in unison. "Sorry." She apologised, giving Embry a sheepish smile. "My sister is…weird."

Embry shook his head. "It's cool." Gingerly he took her hand again. "As long as we're not weird." He asked her, looking at her through his thick lashes. She was struck again by those butterflies, and bumped her shoulder with his.

"Of course not." She told him, interlinking their fingers. Being with Embry was easy. It felt comfortable. She didn't want to ruin it, didn't want him to be freaked out by her overzealous relatives, or their annoying friends, or her own insecurities.

She just wanted it to be _them_.

* * *

"Jacob's getting tall."

Alex looked over at Paul from her seat in the back, frowning at his overly casual tone. Her sister was asleep beside him, knocked out and still cradling a tub of leftovers.

"What?"

Paul shot her a meaningful look in the rear-view mirror. Alex shook her head. "He's not… doing that." She said, maybe a little too defensively, because Paul raised an eyebrow.

"You need to tell us if he's getting close to Phasing. He's dangerous until he's not, okay?"

"Wow, so profound." Alex said reflexively. Paul gave her a horrifyingly parent-like stern look, and she blanched. "I will! I know, okay. I told Sam I would keep an eye out, and I _will_." She didn't want Jacob to Phase. She didn't want him to have all the responsibility and difficulties that came with being Pack. She knew that when he Phased, he would technically be Alpha – he was a _Black_ – descended from a long line of Pack leaders. Sue her for wanting her best-friend to have a normal life.

Because what the Pack did, it was far from normal. They were tired and hyperalert at the best of times, run-ragged and exhausted at the worst of times. They couldn't rest, not whilst the Cold Ones posed a threat to their people, and unfortunately, the Cullens seemed to be a magnet for unfriendly parties. A thought occurred to her, an old memory – her weird dream – and she looked back to Paul.

"Hey, weird question – but, um, what happened to that coven of suckers that were hunting on our land?"

Paul looked startled by the question. "Oh – you mean back in… God – that must have been March, right? Back when you had that freaky dream." he smiled, "time flies." He said, giving her sister a soft look.

Alex wrinkled her nose, "Uh, yeah. What happened?"

Paul frowned, thinking. "The Cullens destroyed them, I'm pretty sure." He looked vaguely nauseous for a moment, "That chick from Forks who's banging one of 'em, she got all beat up in the process."

"Shit." Alex said, mind-spinning at a hundred miles an hour. _How could she have dreamed that?_

"Yeah, I know right – how on _earth_ could you find one of those _things_ attractive?"

"Mmm…" Alex hummed noncommittally, feeling a little sick herself.

_"Dream Walkers were members of the tribe who were able to live through others…They could walk in other people's dreams…" _

Billy's words came back to her, and she shivered. "You okay, Big A?" Paul asked her, frowning in concern. She nodded wordlessly.

"_They could see through the eyes of others, dream what they dream, see what they see, move as they move, go to places of memory…"_

She needed to talk to Billy Black.


	12. Mine: Chapter 11

In September, Bella Swan went missing for an evening and the Cullens left town.

Alex remembered being woken by the slam of the front door as Paul left with Kitty to go help with the search for the teenager. She remembered the faint relief on Sam's face when they all found out the good news; that the Cullens had left Forks.

She was relieved. With the Cullens gone, the less the Pack needed to worry, and things fell into an easy rhythm. Even Jacob seemed happier, whatever funk he had gotten into during the holidays lifted, and Quil had finally stopped pining over Maya – though why he had ever liked her when all they did was fight was beyond all of them. Her and Embry were…good. Things were always good.

They never fought, never even really disagreed. Perks of being friends, she supposed. With school taking all focus for him, they hadn't been seeing each other as much, and what time they did have to themselves was usually monopolized by study. Embry's mother pressured him to do well, but Embry had a drive to succeed that was all his own. He'd told her once, confidingly, that all he wanted to do was get out of town, go to college in a different state, even another country if he could. Alex had faith in him. He was smart, and he was dedicated.

Which was why, at lunch, there were textbooks and pages of notes spread across their whole table. Quil had long since given up trying to set his food down, and was cradling it in his lap, as Embry worked feverishly on a practice essay in preparation for their literature test that afternoon. Alex herself was trying to absorb information through osmosis, one hand on the novel like a bible, and using her other to shovel her lunch into her mouth.

Jacob approached their table whistling, long hair tied back in a loose ponytail, and Alex watched the swing of it vaguely mesmerised – jumping out of it as he slammed his lunch tray down, sending some of the papers flying.

"Watch it!" Embry snapped, not even looking up.

"I've got it, Em." Alex told him, briefly tucking a strand of her boyfriend's own long locks behind his ear. She shot Jacob a dirty look as she moved around picking up the notes.

He just smiled at her, and Quil sighed loudly, setting down his sandwich tiredly. "What is it, dude?" He asked in a tone of long suffering. Alex stopped dead as she recognised the annoying expression on Jacob's face.

"This is about that Bella chick isn't it?" She said accusingly.

Jacob just smiled mysteriously. "Maybe."

Alex rolled her eyes, shoving the papers back under a binder noisily. "Okay, loser."

Quil snickered. "Isn't she dating that rich paleface from off the rez?"

The faint jump of nerves was just habitual at this point, and Alex took a small breath as she sat down. _Of course, they didn't know, they wouldn't know._ Jacob shook his head, shoving half a sandwich into his mouth. "They skipped town. She's totally on the market, and she wants me to fix some bikes for her."

"So, slave-labour?" Alex asked, wrinkling her nose at the mashed-up food she could see in his mouth.

"Ah, c'mon – like getting to spend hours in the garage with a sexy lady is _labour_. I think she's into me, dudes." He waggled his eyebrows. Alex thought back to the few times she'd encountered Bella. At the beach, she had _not_ seemed the type to be into bikes, garages, or her idiot best-friend. But then again, she _had_ dated a vampire. Maybe she liked the thrill of knowing you might _die_.

She shrugged. "Well, good luck with that, Jake." Embry made a noise that may have been disparaging or encouraging, but Jacob beamed at the pair of them anyway.

"You _have_ to tell us when you get to second base, Jakey-boy! She's _hot_!" Quil said, almost longingly. Alex slapped him upside the head. "Hey! What? It's ritual."

Alex gave him a filthy look. "Okay, one – that's sexist as _shit_, you pig – and two, as if Jake's gonna make it past first!" Quil burst into cackling mirth, and even Embry lifted his head to laugh at Jacob, who was gaping in indignation. Alex shrugged across the table at him with an easy smile, pretending as though the image of him with Bella wasn't making her stomach feel weird. _It must have been because she knew what Bella had been up to before. Right._

She leant into Embry anyway, trying to erase the uncomfortable feeling. Jacob tracked her movement, mouth shutting and lips tightening briefly before he turned to throw his crust at Quil.

In truth, Alex had been feeling uncomfortable a _lot_ lately. It was the only thing that was kind of ruining her weeks. Sure, she had been sleeping, but she'd been having more _weird_ dreams, and each time she went to Jacob's with the intent of speaking to Billy, she chickened out by the time she hit his driveway.

Whilst she knew that the dreams weren't normal – because she _knew_ it wasn't right to keep seeing the occasional patrol through the eyes of one of the Pack – she could at least content herself with the fact that she only seemed to be having the vivid dreams when they were wolves. There had been no more naked men, no sir. _Thank god for that. _

And besides. She didn't want to be told that something was wrong with her.

She didn't want to _deal_ with whatever weirdness was going on – and yeah, she knew something was up, and _yeah,_ she was kind of hoping that if she ignored it, it would go away – because she just wanted to be _normal_. She wanted to do _normal _homework, hang out with her _normal _friends, go on _normal_ dates with her _normal_ boyfriend, and be a _normal_ teenager. It was bad enough that she occasionally had dinner with a bunch of werewolves, for crying out loud. She didn't want to add another level of craziness.

So, she just… _dealt_ with it.

Besides. They were just… dreams. Weirdly vivid, intensely real, very accurate _dreams._

* * *

After her incredibly difficult, very disappointing, and horribly bad literature paper – Alex just wanted to wallow in self-pity and eat greasy, terrible pizza. As it turned out, Embry did not want to do either of those things, Quil was terrible at being emotionally supportive, and did not live close enough to the pizza place to get it delivered, and was also stuck in detention that afternoon for throwing paint at Maya – which left Jacob as her only hope of recovering from her devastating afternoon.

So, after bidding Embry goodbye at the library, and stopping by the detention room to wave at Quil, she began to relatively short walk to Jacob's. He lived pretty close by, and it was only the goodness of his heart that made him join the daily carpool, gamely jumping into Quil's car as Quil headed to Embry's and then her own house, every _morning_. Yet more evidence of his sweet nature that she was fully ready to take advantage of. Jacob was _great_ at making bad things seem a little better, and even better at genuinely motivating speeches.

She bypassed the house, heading around the side to the garage, and trying very hard not to look at the clearing she knew was just beyond the trees – and her unfortunate memory-dream-thing – she failed, but at least Jacob was in. She could hear soft voices, and figured he had the radio on.

She tramped happily over the grass, unable to help the little skip in her step. "Yo, Jake! I have had a _sucky_ day – can I absorb your brilliance for a while? I'll order pizz – oh." Alex stopped dead in the doorway, taking in the scene in front of her.

Jacob and Bella Swan were mid-laughter, pressed close together against the skeletons of a pair of motorcycles, looking very cosy. "Uh, sorry – I didn't realise-"

"Alex!" Jacob said very loudly, eyes going wide, "What are you, um, doing here?"

Alex looked between them, watching as Bella's smile faded to be replaced by her usual blank stare. "Just…um, here to…" Jacob gave her a meaningful look, giving her a tiny nod towards the exit. She couldn't deny the tiny bloom of hurt in her gut, but she smiled anyway. "Just here to remind you to bring my, uh, _hat_ – yeah, my hat – to school tomorrow. Thanks. Um, bye. Nice to see you, Bella."

The girl gave her a small smile. "Bye, Alex." Alex told herself she had been imagining the dismissive tone, but she left little faster anyway.

She stood for a moment in Jacob's large backyard, a little lost.

Well – that had certainly been…something.

So, Jacob hadn't been lying about the whole Bella-plus-bikes thing, and he _definitely_ hadn't been faking the obsession either. Alex didn't think that Jacob had ever looked so desperate to be rid of one of his friends to speak to a girl before. Although, she could be wrong. A little sour feeling twisted her gut as she remembered that Jacob had actually known Bella for much longer than he had known her, and in truth, who was she to say what Jacob was like around girls anyway. _And why did she care?_ She scowled at the sky, at her own weirdness. _Why was she standing around in his backyard debating the way he acted with girls?_

It didn't matter. Nothing mattered. She was suddenly in a worse mood than she had been before, and didn't really have the patience for _anyone_ in that moment.

Like any rational person, she turned on her heel and headed for the forest, and the trail she knew led to Emily's house. _Maybe Emily would have some muffins or something_. She thought grumpily. _And maybe she'd be able to get a hug or two out of her too. _

* * *

She knocked twice on Emily's door before she let herself in. Emily always left the door unlocked, a product of the safe neighbourhood and the fact that her fiancée was a supernatural being.

The house smelt like baked goods, and as she slipped her shoes off in the entryway, Emily popped up from behind the kitchen counter, a tray of –_ yes! – _cookies in her grip. She looked surprised for a beat, before her beautiful face split into simple joy. It made Alex feel a little better already. "Alex! What a pleasant surprise! How are you, baby?"

Alex, who was in the process of formulating a standard response and a fake smile, crumbled a little at her honest curiosity. "Pretty shit, actually." She said, unable to keep from pouting a little.

Emily's face creased in concern, and she set the cookies down – stepping back to hold her arms out. Alex went gratefully into the embrace, even if she had to bend her back awkwardly to effectively bury her face in Emily's shoulder. She smelt like sugar and the forest. "Oh, baby, what's happened? Did you and Embry break up?" Emily stroked her hair.

Alex snorted. "No, Embry and I are _fine_." She let herself have another moment of the embrace before she drew back. Emily let her go, but stayed in her space with an expression of motherly concern. "I just had a bad day. I did really terribly on a test, and then Jacob blew me off for Bella Swan, and I've been having really weird dreams recently." She hadn't meant for the last part to slip out, but Emily didn't seem overly concerned, instead cooing, and offering her a cookie. It kind of burnt her mouth, but it was delicious and Alex was not in the position to be turning down free food, especially not _Emily's_ free food.

The _best_ part about taking solace in Emily – and she didn't want to disparage her own mother; she _adored _her mother – was that she didn't offer suggestions like; _why don't you speak to the teacher and ask to re-do the paper? _Or, _you didn't study, are you truly surprised you did badly?_ Instead, she kept her plied with cookies and lemonade, told her she was smart enough to make up the grade, not to worry about Jacob's little crush, and offered to cook her dinner.

"That's okay, Emily – thank you." Alex declined politely. Whilst she would have normally accepted, she also knew that she should get home and take a leaf out of Embry's book and do some study. And maybe attempt to blackmail Topher into giving her his old notes. She felt better anyway. "You're the best."

Emily preened a little. "Oh, stop it, you. I'll give you some cookies to take with you."

"I mean it." Alex told her seriously.

Emily laughed. "Flattery will get you _everywhere_, Alexandra. Bring the cups to the sink, would you?"

Alex stood obediently, walking the dishes to the sink as the front door opened again, and Sam walked in. He pulled the same surprised to pleased face as Emily, but on a smaller scale – though Alex privately thought he had trained himself out of smiling when he became alpha. "Hey, Sam." She greeted him.

"Hello, Alex. Good to see you. Are you here for dinner?"

"Just leaving." Alex turned to accept the small Tupperware of cookies from Emily, and let the older woman pull her into another hug. "Thanks again, Emily."

"No problem, chicken. You're always welcome here." Emily patted her fondly on the cheek, as they parted, and Alex grinned at her, stepping around Sam's bulk as he made a bee-line for Emily. "Hi, honey." Emily greeted Sam softly, and Alex busied herself with tying up her shoes as they embraced behind her.

"Do you want a lift home, Alex?" Sam asked, solemnly, as he asked everything. Alex shook her head.

"Nah, I'm right. Thanks though."

"You sure? It's getting dark outside." Alex turned to check out the indigo sky, the last vestiges of the orange sunset hidden behind the trees.

"I'm sure."

Sam made a _harrumph_ noise, but nodded. "Fine. Stick to the roads. No cross-country."

"But it's _faster_-" Alex began to whine, but Sam held up a finger, winding his other arm around an amused looking Emily.

"The roads! I'll know if you don't."

Alex rolled her eyes, but sighed. "Fine. You're so _creepy_, Sam." She told him, nudging the door open. "Bye guys!"

"Bye, Alex!" Emily said brightly, waving. Sam gave her an exasperated look, but waved as well. Alex shut the door clumsily, balancing her bag and the cookies. The night was already rife with the sounds of nocturnal forest life, the bird song replaced with the croaks and clicks of creatures that favoured the night.

True to her word, she began the walk back home. She wasn't afraid of the dark, nor the unknown in the void beyond the trees on either side of her. She felt content in the knowledge that there were protectors out there, that the Cullens were gone, and that her family and friends were safe.

There was nothing to truly worry about.

* * *

"I'm worried about Jacob." Quil said seriously, dropping his bag heavily on Embry, and shoving Alex up a spot in order to wedge himself between them. Embry shot him an irritated look, and Alex scrambled back upright with a scowl. "I'm _serious_. He's all…_weird_. And he won't play Call of Duty with me anymore."

Alex rolled her eyes. "It's because he's with _Bella_, stupid."

Quil looked genuinely surprised. "What? Really?"

"Yeah, I walked in on them the other week. He blew me off too – you're not special." Alex said grumpily.

"You _walked in on them?!"_ Embry looked scandalised.

"Wha- _no!_ You pervs! They were just, like, hanging out." Alex hit Quil as he began to glaze over. "Stop thinking about it, weirdo."

Quil jolted. "Sorry."

Embry sighed. "Look, he's just really into her. Can't blame him for wanting to spend time with her." He looked across at her, and Alex blushed at his faint smile.

Quil made a gagging noise in between them, and brought his hands up to shove lightly at their faces. "_Please_ don't start! I am _devastatingly_ single, and you two aren't helping."

"Sorry."

"Sorry, Quil."

Alex and Embry muttered together, shooting each other grins when Quil was distracted again. Quil slapped his palms down onto the table. "Listen – what happened to bros before hoes? No offence, Alex."

Alex shrugged. "None taken." She _had_ been missing Jacob a little recently. When he wasn't at school he was with Bella, and when he was at school he wasn't really with them, daydreaming or rambling about her virtues – and couldn't deny that it rankled.

"I say we go over there." Quil declared, "We go, and we make him hang out."

Embry sighed. "Quil, can't we just leave him be? He's obviously into her. He told me that she's his girlfriend."

Alex's stomach performed an odd dip, like dropping on a rollercoaster. "What? When did he say that?"

Embry shrugged. "I don't know. A while ago." Alex nodded, a little unsure why the revelation had surprised her so much. "Anyway. I still think it's a dumb idea."

"Don't you _miss_ your bro, Embry? C'mon." Quil wheedled. "Alex is coming, so you should too."

"Um – when did I say that?" Alex asked.

Quil shrugged. "You're coming." Alex sighed, and began to pack up her books, knowing there was no arguing with Quil. "We'll just swing round on Saturday, c'mon, it'll be great."

"Fine." Embry said, and passed Quil his bag back roughly. "I'm gonna be late for homework help now."

Quil snickered. "Homework help? Come _on_, Embry-"

"Shut the fuck _up_, Quil!" Embry snarled suddenly, whirling on his friend. "Do you ever get sick of your own voice?" Quil fell silent, gaping. Alex blinked in surprise. She'd never, _ever_ heard Embry speak like that.

"Em-" She began, but he was already striding away, shoulders set in a hard line. She frowned after him. "Whoa."

"I think I just lost five years of life." Quil said faintly. "What did I do?"

Alex snorted, trying to disguise her concern with flippancy. "You _are_ an irritating ass." She stood, and offered him a hand. "Come on, we should go. You can drive me home."

"Yeah alright." Quil agreed, still gazing after Embry.

Quil ended up staying for dinner, and they crashed on her couch, binging the box-set of Forensic Files that Alex had once found at a garage sale. It was nice, to hang out with a friend. She knew that Quil probably wanted company, and to take his mind off Embry's outburst. She wasn't being dramatic; it was entirely out of Embry's character, and the sheer viciousness of his voice was completely unprecedented. Eventually, Quil made the decision to stay over, and Alex dragged the blow-up mattress into her room, and they went to bed as the night ticked over to day.

She lay awake, and after a minute of rustling, Quil piped up. "Are we okay?"

Alex frowned into the dark. "What do you mean?"

Quil was quiet for a moment, but Alex knew he was just trying to work out his thoughts. Quil was many things, but he wasn't particularly emotionally aware. But he was loyal, and he loved his friends, and Alex knew that he'd do anything for them – including having uncomfortable conversations. "Like, the four of us." He sighed. "I don't know, just lately it feels like we're drifting apart."

"Is this about me and Embry?" Alex asked gingerly.

Quil huffed a breath. "A bit."

"Oh." Alex said shortly. "I'm sorry-"

"But not just you, and, like, I'm not _mad_ about it – it's just different." He hastened to add, and Alex listened to him shuffle around. "And now, Jacob won't ever hang out with us, because he's busy with some girl – and Embry blew up today, and… I don't know." Alex waited. "I just don't like that it's different. I don't feel like we're as close anymore."

"Quil, you know that I'd hide a body for you." Alex said seriously. "So would the other two."

"Yeah, _I know_ – but still."

Alex bit her lip. "We'll sort it out. I promise that things won't change, okay? BFFLS."

Quil laughed faintly. "Yeah. BFFLS." Alex drew her covers up higher, and rolled over, a nervous pit in her stomach. "I really am happy for you and Embry. He, like, glows. It's weird."

Alex grinned into her pillow. "One day you'll find a girl who you'll… _glow_ for, Quilly."

"Gross." Quil said softly, and they both laughed. "Okay. Let's end this awkward shit. Um. Night."

"Night, man." Alex said.

_Things won't change._ She'd make sure of it.


	13. Mine: Chapter 12

The next morning, Alex forced Quil into the shower, and flopped back into bed to call Embry.

"Hey, Em."

"_Hi."_

She winced at his flat tone. "You okay?"

"_Just peachy._"

Alex resisted the urge to call him out on his ridiculously sarcastic tone, and levelled a smile on her face anyway. "Okay, um, are you cool if me and Quil swing by to pick you up soon? He's still set on seeing Jake."

"_Quil's with you?"_

"Uh, yeah, he crashed here last night."

Embry barked a short, sardonic laugh. "_Okay then."_

"What, Em?" Alex asked, sitting up with a scowl. "Since when is hanging out with my best _friend_ not okay?"

"_You're really asking me, your boyfriend, why having a sleepover with another guy isn't okay?" _Embry scoffed. "_Wow, you're really making my morning, Alexandra."_

"Embry! What is your _problem_?" Alex snapped.

"_Right now? You."_

Alex gaped, speechless. "O-okay… um." She stuttered to a halt. "I'm sorry. Can we talk about it? Please?" Embry made a noncommittal noise, and she jumped as her bedroom door flew open, revealing Quil dressed and with his hair dripping onto her carpet. "We'll- um, we'll start heading to yours okay?"

"_Fine_." Embry hung up, leaving Alex staring at her phone.

"All good to go? What's up?" Quil asked, pulling his shoes on.

Alex blinked, turning to give him a bewildered look. "I think we just had our first fight."

Quil gaped. "Oh shit. Do you need me to beat him up?"

Alex shook her head, still confused. "Um, no. I'm in the wrong I think."

"Oh." Quil frowned. "Do I need to beat you up?"

Alex shook her head violently. "Oh god no. Please don't." She sighed, running her fingers through her hair. It was getting long. "Come on. Let's just go get him and get this disaster day going."

* * *

Alex's eyes widened as Embry left his house, slamming the door loud enough to be heard in the car. Beside her, Quil whistled. It looked as though he had grown a whole _foot_ overnight. Surely not. Alex rubbed her eyes, and squinted back at Embry as he stalked towards the car. Nope. Her eyes were not deceiving her.

He opened the door and swung himself in, and all thoughts flew from her head as she met his angry eyes in the rear-view mirror. She turned in her seat to make proper eye contact with him. "Hey, Em." She reached out for his hand, and grabbed it. "I'm really, _really_ sorry. I didn't know it would upset you. I would never have done it if I had known."

His hard face softened a little, and her heart leapt hopefully as he gripped her hand back. "It's-it's okay. I think I overreacted a little." _There_ was her Embry, in his warm eyes and earnest smile. "We're alright?" he asked her quietly, and she grinned.

"Of course, Em."

"Oh, thank _god_!" Quil exhaled loudly, shooting the two of them a relieved look. "The only thing worse than your PDA is you fighting." Alex laughed, releasing Embry as her boyfriend leant over to hit Quil playfully. "OW! Shit, Em – it was a joke, dude!" Quil let go of the wheel with one hand to clutch at his shoulder.

Embry looked surprised. "Sorry! I didn't mean to… to hurt you." Alex watched him in the mirror as he slouched back slightly, looking at his hands as if seeing them for the first time. She frowned worriedly, turning her eyes to road. _Something was still not quite right with Embry._

_That's okay._ She told herself resolutely. _She'd make it right. _

* * *

They pulled up at Jacob's, and piled out of the car, Alex making a beeline for Embry. She threw her arms around him, trying to ignore the weirdness of only reaching up to his chin, rather than being the same height. He hugged her back immediately, sighing. As they rocked for a moment, she became aware of how _heated_ he was.

"Em, you're hot!" She told him, leaning back to examine his face.

He grinned, and winked. "Thanks, Alex. You're not bad yourself."

"No, I-" Alex began, but he was already yelling at Quil, and she was left to look after him as the pair of them headed for the garage. "I meant you're burning up…" She finished lamely. She sighed, and jogged after them, slipping into the garage after them.

Jacob was standing, looking surprised – but a hell of a lot more happy than he had looked at _her_ unexpected arrival, which she tried not to let bug her – and was in the middle of introductions. "-and you remember Alex, obviously."

Alex leant around Embry to catch sight of Bella, who hadn't gotten up, and was regarding them all a little warily. "Hi, Bella."

Bella gave her the same tight smile. "Hello, Alexandra."

Alex felt her own friendly smile grow stale. _Okay then._

"So, the bike building story's true!" Quil piped up, looking a little smug.

Bella coughed, "Oh, uh, yeah – I taught him everything he knows."

Quil almost _giggled, _and Embry and Alex shot him a concerned look. "And the part about teaching you how to _ride_ them? And the part about being his girlfriend?"

"Quil-!" Alex began, exasperated, but Jacob cut over her, babbling nervously.

"I _said_ she was my, girl-friend. Friend girl! And, yeah, I was gonna teach her to ride the bikes – but it's not like, I mean, she's paying for the parts… and I just-"

Alex coughed loudly, making Jacob stutter into silence. Bella looked amused, and she tilted her head slightly. "So, you guys both have girlfriends. That's really cool."

Jacob snickered, as Quil gaped in shock. Embry shifted a little closer to Alex, and shot her a superior look that made her roll her eyes. "Well, yeah." Embry said, and Bella looked a little surprised.

"Oh – you and Alex?" she gave Jacob a look for some reason. "I thought- okay." Alex tilted her head, unsure about the sudden awkward atmosphere.

"I've certainly got more game than little Jakey." Quil seemed to have recovered, and Jacob growled playfully.

"Come here and say that!"

Jacob leapt for Quil, and Embry jumped into the fray. They had all clearly missed each other. Alex stood back, and watched them fondly. "Should we, uh, stop them?" Bella asked. Alex gave her a surprised look.

"Oh, nah – they just need to get it out of their system. They never really do _that_ much damage." She said dotingly.

Bella was giving her an appraising look. "You're very good friends with them."

Alex shrugged. "They're my only friends here."

Bella hummed thoughtfully. "I've never really had many guy friends. I'm just glad Jacob is so sweet to me." She paused, "He's my best friend, too."

Alex unfolded her arms, feeling a little uneasy at the vague possessive tone of Bella's voice. "Um, okay." She said.

"I've known him for so long now, he's just so easy to be with, you know?" Bella continued.

Alex resisted the urge to tell her it wasn't a competition, but resisted, smiling rigidly instead. "Yep. I do." The boys were still scuffling on the ground, and Bella casually took a seat in the open Rabbit, picking up Jacob's discarded hoodie and pulling it decisively into her lap, and adopting a patient expression. Alex stared at her for a moment, at the way she just seemed to _fit_ in Alex's usual spot in the garage. "Right. I'm gonna…go."

"It was good to see you!" Bella said, with a perfect smile. Alex felt her own face fix into an almost grimace, as she gave the brunette an awkward wave, and began to head for the exit.

Jacob stuck his head up, looking a little disappointed and sweaty. "You're off?" Quil disentangled himself, and turned a sleazy smile onto Bella, who shifted uncomfortably.

Alex nodded. "Yeah, dude. I've just remembered I've got, um, history homework."

Jacob frowned for a moment, before his attention strayed to Quil's attempts at chatting Bella up. "See ya." He told her distractedly, taking a swift step towards Bella again. Alex waved at his back sarcastically, and turned to leave.

She was halfway across the grass to the car, when someone called her name. "Al! Hey – wait up." Embry caught up to her in a few loping strides, and Alex blinked at his rapid movement. He gave her a bemused smile. "What's up? You don't even take history."

Alex huffed a laugh. "It's nothing, Em. Just didn't think I was too welcome there."

Embry frowned. "What do you mean? Jacob was happy to see you."

Alex pulled a face. "I don't know. Bella, I guess." She shrugged. "It doesn't matter."

Embry pouted. "It matters to me." He told her. "I mean, she said more to you than she did to me, so."

Alex laughed slightly. "Thanks, Em." She told him. "You're sweet."

Embry smiled. "Did you wanna do something?"

Alex bit her lip, looking from Embry to the garage. "You're sure you don't want to stay?"

"I just offered to go with you!" Embry snapped suddenly, and Alex jumped at his sudden volume. He looked mortified in the next second. "Sorry!"

Alex shook her head. "It's okay – are you, I mean – are you feeling alright?"

Embry twitched slightly. "I'm _fine_. I don't know. I just feel…_angry_."

Alarm bells went off in Alex's head, and she tried to keep her face still. "Oh. Well, you promise you'll tell me if you feel, like, _really_ angry?"

Embry raised an eyebrow, and threw an arm around her shoulders. "Whatever you want, weirdo."

"Yeah." Alex said absently.

_It was impossible right? It had to be apophenia – just seeing patterns that weren't there. Embry was human. He was human. His mother wasn't Quileute. He hadn't even been born in La Push._

But the sudden growth, his random anger, his body heat.

_All_ signs that Sam had told her to watch for, to report if she saw them; but if she saw them in _Jacob_, or even Quil. Not in Embry. Not her Embry.

Even so, she kept a close watch on him, reluctant to let him go home after the movie they watched. She watched him from the driveway as he jogged into the light sprinkling of rain that had begun to fall. His new, tall form disappeared into the gathering darkness far too quickly, and she pressed a hand to her forehead. She was sweating. She was nervous.

* * *

Sunday dawned cold and clear, and though Alex had been meaning to get a start on some homework, she couldn't get Embry out of her head. She'd woken from a fitful sleep with the same worried pit her stomach, and when she realised she had been reading the same line in her textbook for the past fifteen minutes, she gave up, slamming her book shut, and standing up.

As she got dressed, she called Embry, putting the call on speakerphone.

"_Hi, it's Embry-"_

"Em! Thank god, I-"

"-_leave a message and I'll call you back. Thanks."_ A beep sounded, and Alex groaned, crossing to end the call.

"Damn it." Alex ran her hands through her hair, debating her next move. Whilst she debated, she called him one more time, ending it as it rang out again. He was probably just busy, she figured, yeah totally busy, _on a lazy Sunday afternoon._ She grunted in frustration, and headed for her door. She'd just go see what he was up to, just swing by and say hi – she could do that, right?

Alex shivered in the cold air, cursing herself for forgetting to grab her jacket. She didn't want to turn back, and Embry wasn't too far away anyway. She rounded the corner to his street, and began to pick up the pace a little. La Push was a quiet town, the sounds of nature prevalent as the infrastructure of the town was nowhere near urban enough to disrupt the peace. So, as Alex reached Embry's neighbours, she could hear the sounds of yelling clearly enough to make her break into a run; heart leaping into her throat.

She pelted up the sidewalk, jumping the three stairs that led up to Embry's front door, and pounded on the peeling paint. A little flaked off under her fist – but the yelling didn't stop. She knocked again, and leant on the bell, and heard a disjointed curse, and steps moving quickly towards her.

The door swung open violently, revealing Tiffany Call, irate and breathing heavily. "What do you want?" she snapped. She must have been beautiful once, with the same round expressive eyes as her son, and his sleek hair and symmetrical soft features. Now though, hardened by years of scowling and bad temper, she looked worn, older than her years.

"Oh, um, Ms. Call – I don't know if you remember me, but I'm friends with your son-"

"Yes, I know who you are – we don't exactly have a lot of palefaces here." She said shortly. "What do you want?" she repeated.

"Who is it?" Embry's voice boomed from in the house, and Alex's eyebrows jumped at the pitch of it. It sounded like he had gone through another voice drop.

"Your little _friend_. Alice." Tiffany yelled back.

"You _know_ her name is _Alex!_" Embry sounded furious, and he appeared in the hall behind his mother. Alex gulped nervously. He'd grown again, and not just in height this time; he'd broadened now, and Alex felt her stomach flip. "You always do that."

"Do what, Embry?" Tiffany was livid.

"Act like a _bitch_ just because I have friends that care about me!" Embry stomped towards them both, angry eyes only for his mother.

"How _dare_ you speak to me in that way! After _everything_ I have done for you, you ungrateful-" Tiffany made to slam the door on her, but Alex caught sight of the way Embry had begun to tremble. She stuck her foot in the crack of the door, and pushed against Tiffany. "What are you doing?!" Tiffany screeched, staring at Alex as she forced her way into the house.

"Embry!" Embry's red-tinged eyes slid to her with some difficulty. Alex tried to smile. "Hey, I need you to calm down, okay?"

He didn't speak, his fists clenching at his side. Tiffany scoffed. "What the hell is wrong with you now, Embry?" Embry just shook harder, edges almost seeming to blur.

Alex rounded on Tiffany. "Would you _shut up_?" she snapped, and Tiffany gaped. Her momentary struck-dumb surprise only lasted for a few seconds, not long enough for Alex to formulate a plan.

"How _dare _you? This is my house, and _my_ son, you bitc-"

Embry _snarled,_ a real, visceral, _animal_ sound, and Alex jumped at him, wrapping her arms around his middle and rugby tackling him to get him to move back a few paces. "Embry, _please_, come with me outside." Embry had taken more steps back out of surprise, but Alex knew she couldn't get him moving any further. It was like pushing against a brick wall. _He was burning to the touch._ "Embry!" she hit at his chest, and he looked down at her, as if surprised to see her there. "_Please_." She whispered.

He jolted, and turned in place, hurrying for the kitchen, for the backyard. Alex rounded on Tiffany, who had moved to follow him. She lifted a finger, and drew herself up, using the few inches she had on the woman as best she could. "Don't." she told her shortly, ice-cold.

Tiffany's lip twitched, and she threw up her hands before storming towards the stairs. Alex waited until she heard her footsteps above her before she turned and sprinted after Embry. He wasn't in the backyard, and her heart skipped a beat before she took in the sight of some crushed bushes along the border of his garden. She slipped into the trees, stepping under the canopy.

It was like someone had thrown a blanket of quiet over them. It was near unnatural, and Alex was able to find him quickly. He was still shaking, crouched in the dirt, his fingers dug deep into the earth – clinging to it, trying to find stability. "W-what's happening to me?" his voice was frightened, shaky and Alex's fear faded away to sympathy.

"It's okay, Embry – I promise, things will be okay." She walked towards him slowly.

"I can…_feel_ something." Embry cried, a wounded sound. "It wants to get _out_, Alex!" Alex crouched beside him, flinching at the way he whipped around to look at her. His eyes were wide, and his teeth were bared in an unconscious snarl. "It _hurts…"_ his voice descended into an animal whine.

Alex swallowed. "Just let go, Em."

He shook his head, form shaking, muscles flexing. "I can't."

Alex reached out to touch his cheek gently, and winced at the sweat rolling down his temple. "Let _go_." Embry shuddered again, and went very still.

Then, without warning – Embry exploded into Phase.

Alex screamed, loud and high – sending birds fluttering away – scrambling back on all fours as Wolf-Embry thrashed into being, with a loud howl. He was unsteady, like a new-born foal as he stumbled around the clearing, which would have been fine, _if he wasn't the size of a large draft horse, with razor sharp claws and no clear sense of what was happening. _Alex rolled, trying to get to her feet as one of his huge paws nearly slammed into the ground just inches from where she had been.

_God, where were the Pack?_ She was so_ stupid_, she should have called, should have warned _someone_ about Embry. Now she was by herself with a newly Phased wolf with _no clue how to calm him down_. She let out a low whimper, as she finally managed to stand, clinging to a low hanging branch. Embry turned at the noise, and Alex opened her mouth to talk to him, to try and reassure him, even as she couldn't tell if the glaze in his familiar eyes was fear or anger.

Out of the trees, quick as bullets, three furred forms appeared. "Oh, thank god." Alex sagged, as Sam growled lowly, Jared's dark brown body nudging Embry backwards. Embry started to whimper, and Alex took an involuntary step towards him. A wall of silver fur was suddenly between her and Embry, and Alex tried to duck around Paul, who simply snapped at her, and began to shepherd her backwards. "No, hey!"

She dropped to the ground again, and crawled under Paul's belly, heading determinedly towards Embry. Jared and Paul were leading him away, into the forest. Paul snarled, and trotted round her again, nudging her hard enough with his muzzle to make her hit the ground. She stumbled a pace before she sat heavily. "Paul, I gotta go with him, he's going to be _freaking_ out." Paul raised a paw threateningly, and she made to move. With a huff of air that was almost a sigh, Paul placed his paw gently but firmly on her stomach, and pressed her into the ground. "Paul!" she screeched, thrashing in the dirt under his immovable grip. "I'm getting _mud_ in my hair!"

Paul yawned, exposing his ferocious fangs casually, and shook his head, fur fluffing around his chin slightly. _We can stay here all evening._ His eyes seemed to say, and she groaned, stilling. Slowly, he lowered himself to the ground next to her, lifting his paw from her torso. Alex briefly entertained the idea of running again, but knew she wouldn't get very far. "You'll take me to see him?"

Paul huffed again, lowering his head to his paws. _Yes, _she assumed. She looked in the direction they'd taken him. To Emily's probably. _Good_. At least there'd be warmth and a friendly face. Her heart ached for him, as adrenaline faded from her system. She felt sick. "Oh, Embry…" she whispered. Paul whined, snuffling at her dirty jeans, and Alex realised she was crying. She wiped at her eyes furiously. "How could this have happened to him?" she asked aloud. She looked at Paul, who's ears were twitching – most likely listening for orders, for an all clear. His eyes were sharp, on her, and he tilted his head. "His mother isn't-"

A horrible thought occurred to her. "Oh god." Alex wasn't informed about every little facet and article of tribal knowledge or Shifter lore, but she knew enough about the Pack to know that it meant that Embry's father had to be _here_, as in, within the La Push Quileute population, and there were only a few families that carried the bloodline. "That fucking _bitch_." She cursed. "She brought him here, and never even told him." She laughed sardonically. "She probably doesn't even realise that he'll know." She wiped away another errant tear, and reached for Paul, sinking her fingers into the fur under his ear, distracting herself with the feeling of his warmth.

He buried his nose in his large paws and gave her an uncharacteristically sad look. Even Paul knew what dissent it would cause. Alex took a steadying breath, and moved a little closer to Paul, trying to use his bulk to get between her and the wind. It seemed like hours before Paul made a low grumbling noise, and nudged her. She stood with him, and he started moving into the trees, keeping a slow pace to allow her to walk with him. She wound her fingers into his fur, and tried to enjoy the sedate calm of the forest. But her heart was beating quickly again, anticipating and worried. She knew Paul could hear it, and was just thankful he hadn't acknowledged it.

Before long, they reached Emily and Sam's – Alex could smell it before she saw it through the trees, the smell of something spiced and baked, a smell of a home. Paul turned from her, and she broke the treeline alone as he went to Phase and get dressed. She waited for him at the bottom of the stairs, unwilling to go in alone. He jogged back towards her, smiling tightly. "He's scared." He said, putting a heavy hand on her shoulder. "Sam just wants him to take it easy tonight, he's getting the official rundown of the stories, and then we're going to send someone to talk to his mother."

Alex frowned. "You're going to tell her?"

Paul shook his head. "No. We can't. She's not Pack, and she's not Tribe." His voice was hard, and Alex nodded, swallowing thickly. "If he gets upset, you have to leave immediately. And don't think you're off the hook for today, either."

Alex nodded again. "Okay. I just want to see him."

Paul smiled, a little more genuinely this time. "He wants to see you too. He's afraid he's hurt you, or scared you, or whatever." He rolled his eyes. "It was all we could do to stop him thinking about it and start to Phase back."

Alex let him open the door but squeezed in before him. The house was warm, and her eyes went straight to Embry, who had been curled in on himself on the couch, Sam facing him and Jared standing just behind him and in front of the kitchen, in front of Emily, like a bodyguard. Alex supposed he really was. Embry leapt up as they made eye contact, and Paul stepped between them, shoving past her roughly, Jared moving forwards in one smooth movement to put a hand on his shoulder – Sam springing up as well.

"Embry-" Sam began, warningly, and Alex rolled her eyes.

"He's fine, Sam." She snapped, and elbowed Paul viciously in the ribs. He didn't even flinch, holding his ground, bare torso tense. "You're fine, right?" she asked Embry directly, looking around Sam.

He nodded quickly. "Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine."

"Let him be, Sam." Emily said softly, and like butter to flame, Sam melted back slightly. He nodded at Jared, and he took a step back again.

Alex moved around Paul again, and took a few halting steps towards Embry, who looked like he was ready to jump out of his skin. "Hey, Embry." She said quietly. "You okay, man?" she got within arms length, and tilted her head, questioning.

Embry let out a hitched breath, and reached for her. In her periphery, she saw Sam and Paul flinch forwards again, but she ignored them, and buried her face in her best-friend's bare chest. His grip was crushing, just on the side of painful, but she clung to him anyway. "I thought- I thought I-"

"You didn't." Alex managed, tightening her own grip as best she could around his broad frame. "You didn't, and I'm right here, and I'm _so sorry, _Embry."

"S'not your fault." He mumbled into her hair, and squeezed her a little. She wheezed, her lungs giving up the last of their oxygen, and the faint sound made Paul clear his throat.

"Okay, that's enough."

Embry let her go as if burned, but Alex clung to him, shooting Paul a glare. "It's fine."

Sam shook his head. "It's not. Embry doesn't know his own strength, Alex. It's not safe for him to be around you or _anyone_ for that matter, until he's learnt some control." Embry trembled, just slightly, and Alex resisted the urge to step away from him. Sam levelled his stare at her. "I mean it. You should know better."

"I won't hurt her." Embry said, voice shaky but strong.

Sam's face twisted with old pain, and Alex lowered her gaze as his eyes went to Emily. "You can't know that." He turned and nodded to Paul. "Take Alex home, and make sure she stays there."

"Sweet. A night off." Paul said lightly, but his eyes were serious. "C'mon Big A, say your goodbyes."

Alex turned to Embry. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alex-" Sam began, exasperated.

"_I'll see you tomorrow._" Alex repeated herself firmly, and wrapped her arms around him again. Gingerly, she felt him reciprocate, embrace loose.

She followed Paul outside, and got into Sam's car. Paul swung himself into the driver's seat and cursed, adjusting the seat so that he could put his feet to the pedals comfortably. "God, I hate his car." He muttered, turning the key in the ignition and backing out of the driveway. "He'll be okay." He said, and Alex tore her eyes away from the house to look at him. "It takes time to get used to, sure, but he'll be fine. He has us. He has you." Alex blinked in surprise. Paul shrugged. "He's not alone."

"I know. It doesn't stop me from worrying, though." Alex sighed.

Paul grunted. "Speaking of _worrying…_"

Alex folded her arms petulantly. "I… look, I didn't know it was going to happen," Paul shot her a disbelieving look, and she amended her statement, "Well, I _suspected_. That's why I was there. It just happened so fast, and I never thought Embry was…" She trailed off, remembering his sudden violent Phase.

"You _are_ okay, right?" Paul sounded vaguely worried. "No, like, PTSD or anything?"

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I have PTSD from seeing you naked, but that's about it."

Paul looked indignant. "Hey! My naked body is a _privilege_."

"I'm telling Kitty you said that." Alex said, and Paul made a choking noise.

_"Please_ don't."

"I won't if you take me to Emily's tomorrow morning." Alex bargained. Paul scowled.

"I would have done that anyway, you brat."

Alex grinned.


	14. Mine: Chapter 13

_**A/N:**_

**Hey guys! I just wanted to thank everyone who's been reading for sticking around! I know my updates haven't been regular, and I'm sorry for that, I'm actually travelling and have been for the last five months :)).**

**I just wanted to make a note that this fic is a SLOWBURN! An attempt at a realistic relationship that has been complicated by the supernatural. If you're not into slowburns, this may not be the story for you, but I can assure you, that the endgame has been finalised for the characters, this story is about their **_story;_** the way their relationship has evolved. I'll make an effort to include more Jacob, as I've been getting some notes about the lack of the big bad wolf himself, but once again, tryna make this organic, and as it is told from Alex's point of view, Jacob isn't always with her; especially considering Jacob's story arc with Bella, which I don't want to dismiss as it plays an important role in shaping him! **

**Thanks again everyone! Lots of love to you all!**

_**(if you wanted to read some stuff from my Ao3 account, I write under pie_pecans_and_parrots)**_

* * *

When Alex got in, both she and Paul fed her parents an elaborate story about how sick she was. Somehow, they fell for it, and Alex made her way slowly upstairs clutching her stomach and trying not to grin. Paul winked at her from the ground floor, before ducking into Kitty's room, and Alex listened to her sister's exclamation of delight for a moment before she went into her bedroom.

She felt a little more settled now; Embry was in good hands, and she'd be with him tomorrow anyway. The matter of his parentage was still heavy on her mind, but she knew all she could do was hope for a peaceful resolution.

Alex took a seat on her bed, running a brush through her wet hair, and stared out at the window. Somewhere, out there in the dark trees, Embry was discovering things about himself that shouldn't have been possible. Somewhere, Embry was afraid.

* * *

"Alright, are you ready?" Paul knocked on her bedroom door, and Alex straightened from tying her good hiking shoes on. It was early, and thought her parents were mostly likely already on their way to work, she'd be able to avoid her brother and sister. Topher would probably keep his mouth shut, but she didn't trust Kitty's indelible _goodness_ not to make her let it slip that Alex was skipping out on school.

She met him in the hallway, and frowned at his shirtless state. "Ew."

Paul frowned, looking down at himself in confusion. "What's wrong with my eight-pack?"

Alex rolled her eyes, walking around him. "Um, _six-pack_, and don't you own a shirt?"

Paul bounced soundlessly down the stairs after her. It was unnatural and unfair, the size of them all, and the grace they somehow possessed. "I'll be taking it off anyway. What's the point?"

Alex shrugged. "I guess."

"Did you take your textbook?" Paul asked her, shutting the door quietly after them as they headed for his truck.

"No. Why?"

Paul sighed. "Sam says you have to do _some_ homework if you're insisting on being there." He twisted in his seat to back out of their driveway, and Alex wondered idly when he had returned Sam's car and gone to get his own. "Embry's gonna be busy."

Alex sniffed. "Moral support never takes homework breaks."

Paul rolled his eyes. "You're so annoying. Don't you wanna go to college?" They coasted quickly through the main part of town; the school traffic not quite begun, and the early morning commuters already out of the main strip.

Alex shrugged. "I'm only a sophomore. I've got time to catch up. Besides, I'll probably just try for a sports scholarship." She set her shoulders. "This is more important."

Paul smiled to himself. "You really care about him, huh?"

"Yeah." Alex said quietly. "He's my best friend."

"You guys have been together for a while now. Do you love him?"

Alex choked on her own spit, coughing as she hit at Paul wildly. "Why do you people keep asking me that?! NO! We haven't even…" she trailed off, clearing her throat.

Paul, however, was insistent. "Haven't…? Haven't what?"

Alex shifted uncomfortably. "Doesn't matter."

Paul waggled his eyebrows, "C'mon, Big A, spill the beans to your favourite brother-in-law!"

"You've proposed?" Alex's eyes went wide, and Paul suddenly looked caught out. "What the fuck, Paul? You guys only _just_ graduated!"

Paul coughed. "Well, I haven't proposed _yet…_ but I'm going to. It sorta has to happen."

Alex shook her head, confused. "Does Kitty know? Is this why she turned down college? Because mom is still kinda mad about that."

"No! No – I mean, we haven't had the conversation. She turned down college because, well, her future is with me." He sounded oddly guilty, and Alex tilted her head.

"What do you mean, Paul?"

He shifted in place. "I mean, there's no harm in you knowing, I guess…" he said, almost to himself. He took a breath. "You know how me, and your sister are, like, amazing together?"

Alex rolled her eyes. "I guess?" Her sister had never been happier. Like, ever. Alex thought Paul was a pretty cool guy, but never in a million years would she have guessed they would click as well as they had.

"Well, it's not just our sweet, sweet chemistry. It's, um, fate. Kinda." Paul hedged.

Alex made a _continue_ gesture with her hands, impatient. She'd heard her sister spout some of that crap before. "Yeah, yeah, you guys are destiny, and nothing can break you apart, blah, blah, blah."

Paul made an amused noise. "Literally. _Literally_ nothing can break us. I Imprinted on your sister back when I first Phased, and it's been bliss since then." He winced. "Well, _mostly_ bliss."

Alex didn't care about the majority of his statement, but the odd word there caught her attention. "_Imprinted._" She repeated. "I haven't heard that word before."

Paul groaned. "This feels so weird. I feel like I'm giving a pseudo sex-talk." He gave Alex a pleading look. "Can't you get Sam to tell you about it?"

Alex gagged. "Ew – why did you say that? Now you _have_ to tell me, or I'll assume it's something gross."

Paul sighed. "Fine! Fine – it's a wolf thing-"

"Obviously." Alex snorted, and he glared at her. "Sorry. Go on."

"As I was _saying_; it's a wolf thing. It's supposed to be rare – it's a connection between souls."

"Soulmates?" Alex asked, as they turned into Emily's driveway.

"But _real_; terrifyingly, all-consumingly _real_. Your Imprint is bound to you just as you are bound to them. They become your reason for _existing_. You would do anything for them, become anything for them; a brother, a friend, a lover. They make you stronger, _better_." His eyes were a little glossy, and Alex stared at him. He sounded deadly seriously. "To be without them is to die. To hurt them is to die. Trust me when I say that." He looked at her, and gave her a half-hearted smile. "I never thought unconditional love on the sort of scale that I feel it, was real. But it is."

Alex nodded weakly. "Wow. Okay." She hesitated. "H-how do you know when you Imprint, I mean, if you've been Imprinted on."

Paul shrugged. "It's different for everyone. I mean, I think it feels a little like you snap into place, like magnets, y'know, a sudden realisation that _holy shit, this is it_. Jared said it was like being electrocuted. Sam said it felt as if he was suddenly drifting away, and then in the next moment – all his strings, everything he was, got attached to Emily. She became his gravity, his reason for being." He gave her an appraising look. "I don't actually really know what it feels like on the other end. Kitty never really talked about it, and when I Imprinted, she kinda fell unconscious." There was an old pain there, a memory that Alex knew was too tender to touch on. She let it be.

"Huh." A thought occurred to her, and she winced, looking at Paul. "Embry hasn't…?"

Paul shook his head with a bark of laughter, and parked the truck. "I might not know what it feels like, but you would know if he had. We'd all know."

Alex felt a little stupid. "Right." She opened the door, and jumped down onto the gravel, closing it with a slam, and joining Paul as he jogged towards the house. Her stomach rumbled. "God, I'm hungry."

Paul sniffed the air. "Same. I think breakfast is on the table though." They exchanged a grin, and ducked into the house.

* * *

Breakfast was indeed ready, and the inhabitants of the house, plus Jared and Embry were already eating. Emily looked up at their entry, and smiled widely. "Morning, guys – help yourselves. There's juice in the fridge." Alex stared; Embry had cut his hair, buzzed it short. He looked like a different person.

"Thanks, Em." Paul said, and headed towards the kitchen.

"Good morning." Alex said, and when Embry finally looked up, tired and gaunt – despite all the extra mass he had gained – she made a beeline towards him, bypassing the food, and settling herself in beside him. Sam made a noise, and she shot him a glare before she turned a smile on Embry. "How are you feeling?"

Embry's smile grew slowly, despite the gloom that hung over him. "Tired, sore, and really, _really_ hungry." He set down his fork on his plate, and turned his hand palm up. Alex slipped her hand into his, marvelling at the size difference. His smile bloomed fully. "But better now."

Alex bit at her lip, squeezing his hand and leaning her head into his shoulder for a moment. "Good." Embry tilted his plate towards her, offering, and she took a piece of toast, chewing slowly, and trying not to be too endeared by the way Embry had begun to endeavour to eat one handed, seemingly reluctant to let go of her. She looked up, meeting Sam's gaze. He was frowning at them, and she resisted the urge to stick her tongue out. "What's on the wolfy-agenda today?" Embry stiffened momentarily beside her, and she squeezed his hand again.

"Phase control. The most important thing." Sam said after a moment.

Jared grinned through a mouthful of egg. "Don't worry, Embry – _some_ of us," he gave Paul a pointed look, "Are still trying to master the art of anger management."

Paul scowled, "Fuck you, Jared."

Embry smiled a little, shy. "Okay." He looked a little uncertain, "How long will it take?"

Sam was impassive. "As long as it takes."

* * *

Alex did end up doing homework. Emily procured a beaten copy of her literature book, and an empty notebook, and made her do a few practice essay prompts. Turned out La Push High hadn't changed their curriculum very much in the few years.

She perched herself on the kitchen island and watched Emily bake in between scribbling down lines about why Frankenstein's monster was a representation of the wave of revolutionary thought that had swept through Shelley's society. Or something along those lines. She was struggling with her third paragraph, and was a few minutes from giving up. She should ask Embry for some help-

The thought occurred to her, the realisation that Embry's future, his college dreams, were uncertain now. The wolves were bound to La Push. Her own sister had given up her own college acceptance to stay with Paul.

She set down her pen carefully. "Emily?"

Emily looked up from her furious whisking of a bowl of egg whites, giving her a questioning look. "What's up, chicken?"

"Can…um, Pack leave La Push?"

Emily nodded, "Of course, they're not confined to the borders of the reservation. You know that." She laughed.

"I meant like, holidays, or like – college." Alex clarified.

Emily looked hesitant. "Well, I don't know. Probably…probably not. The Pack is bound to the people, to the Tribe. And until their safety is guaranteed, which it's not so long as the Cold Ones exist here, the Pack have a responsibility."

"But the Cullens are gone." Alex said, confused.

Emily bit her lip. "There've been reports of attacks in Seattle, ranging down the coast. Sam isn't sure, but he's being cautious."

Alex blanched. "I didn't know that."

Emily smiled slightly. "It's nothing, baby, don't worry about it."

Alex nodded. "Okay. I trust him." Emily tilted her head, and Alex clarified. "Sam, I mean. I think he does a really good job of looking after everyone."

Emily's smile widened. "He'll be happy to hear it."

Alex wrinkled her nose. "Oh no, don't tell him – it'll only make his head bigger." Emily laughed, a lovely sound that made Alex grin. She stretched, and looked out at the grey sky. The rain seemed to be holding for now, and she wanted to go see Embry. "I'm gonna go for a walk."

Emily hummed, frowning out of the window, but into the trees. "Just be careful? And if you get told to go, come back right away, okay?"

Alex sighed. "I'll be fine. Embry won't hurt me." She wound her scarf around her neck and zipped up her hoodie. "No one has any faith in him, I swear!"

Emily looked pained. "We have faith in him, Alex. But we have to be careful." Absently, her hand fluttered to her neck, fingers brushing over her scars. Alex felt a sudden flood of guilt, and moved towards her, kissing her on the cheek and squeezing her gently. Emily gave a soft surprised noise, but smiled.

"I know. I'm sorry." Alex told, before she turned towards the door.

"Bye, Alex."

"See you soon, Em!"

* * *

Alex jogged into the trees, unsure where she was going, but knowing that they'd probably find her before she found them. She was right – Alex only walked for a few minutes until she became aware of the soft padding of paws to her left. She turned, meeting Jared's lolling tongue and characteristic dark grey 'mask' around his eyes, which Alex had always privately thought made him look like a bit like the Hamburglar. "Hey, Jared."

He yipped at her, and ran around her, herding her slightly to the right. She followed him easily as he headed deeper into the forest, breaking into a light run to match his loping stride. He slowed for her as they reached a thinning of the trees, and Alex began to catch glimpses of the dark grey ocean and equally tumultuous sky through the trunks. She wondered where they were to be so close to the ocean, and to be out in the open – as she watched, she saw a flicker of silver on the sand, Paul – it must have been a very isolated stretch of beach.

Jared broke into a gallop to join his brothers on the shore, so Alex made her way onto the sand alone. Sam was standing, Unphased, watching Paul and who Alex realised was Embry. They were snarling and swiping at each other, locked in a brawl. Paul was larger than Embry, not by much, but clearly enough to matter, especially when Embry's inexperience was factored in – and it was clear Embry was tired. He was panting and favouring his right hindleg. Alex winced, and headed towards Sam.

"Is fighting really necessary?" she asked, and he turned, having heard her over the wind and waves. He waited until she was within human hearing distance to respond.

"It's a good way for him to get used to his new form." Sam told her, still watching the pair scuffling. "Plus, he needs to know how to defend himself."

"How's he doing?" Alex asked, watching as Embry darted out of the way of a swipe of Paul's paws.

"He's…calm." Sam admitted begrudgingly. "Certainly, a whole lot better than Jared and Paul were." Both of the wolves in question swung their massive heads around, and Paul bared his fangs at them.

Alex snorted, and gave them a wave. "Embry's always been a peacekeeper." She said, smiling faintly. "He's one of the nicest guys I know."

Sam hummed. "Yeah." He dropped his arms, and nodded towards the trees, catching Jared's attention. "We'll start heading back for lunch." Before Alex could even vocalise her question, he shook his head. "You and Embry can catch up later."

Alex grinned. "You're the man, Sam."

"Yeah, yeah." He said, and began to jog towards the tree line.

Alex made her way towards Embry, who had collapsed onto his belly, and was watching her approach, panting heavily.

"Hey, Em." She said softly, and he perked up slightly, drawing his paws slightly closer to his body as she crouched beside him. Slowly, she reached out to stroke the soft fur of his large cheek. His eyes closed and he gave a low whine. "Tired, huh?" he whined again, and she laughed, scratching behind his ears.

He was softer and sleeker than the others; she wasn't sure if it was because he was younger, or if it was just Embry himself. He was mostly a smoky grey, a deeper colour than Paul's own silver coat, and had a light underbelly, and several black spots across his coat, and a dark grey muzzle. Like his human form, he was leaner than the others, but still formidable, with powerful legs. Alex thought he looked fast, looked like he was built for speed.

"Sam says you're doing well. Guess you won't be missing the Frankenstein essay after all." She said, grinning. He stiffened beneath her, and then stood, shaking her hand from him. "What?" she asked him, worried. _What had she said?_ He looked at her for one long second, familiar eyes in an unfamiliar form – and she could almost sense his rising frustration as they struggled to communicate. After a moment, he turned, and ran into the forest.

She didn't wait long; Embry stepping out from the trees again, buttoning up a pair of shorts and looking tense. He made his way towards her, and she wrapped her arms around herself as the cold wind picked up. "What did I say?" she asked him, as he came to a halt in front of her.

He didn't seem to want to look at her, eyes on the horizon. He looked older without his long hair, strong jaw pronounced and eyes distant, angry. "It's not you." He said finally. He didn't seem to notice the cold. She waited, patient. "It's… I mean, shit, how the hell am I supposed to just go to school, go home, hang out with Jake and Quil?"

Alex bit her lip, and took a small step towards him. Above them, thunder rumbled, the sea turning an ominous green-grey. "It's a big secret." She began, "it's gonna be hard to keep it."

"You kept it." He said, and Alex looked at him sharply – but he didn't look resentful, just sad. "You never said a word."

Alex nodded. "It wasn't mine to tell."

"Sam says that I probably shouldn't talk to them." He said. He looked heartbroken.

"What do you think?" Alex asked gently.

He shrugged, looking angry for a moment, a faint tremor passing through his body before his expression smoothed again. It must have been so disorientating for him; to have all that anger, that power in him, where before he was just Embry. "I think that it'll hurt." He said. "It'll hurt to be with them and not tell them. They won't understand." He looked out to the water again, blinking hard. "I have- I have _responsibilities_ now. They won't understand." He said, but he sounded so hurt that Alex reached for him.

"I understand." She told him, and took his hands in his.

Embry's jaw worked, and his eyes dropped to their interlinked hands. "You'll- I mean, you'll be with me, yeah?" Alex was dismayed to see a wet shine to his eyes, and stepped closer still.

"Hey! Yes – of _course_ I will be. Of course, Em. You don't even need to ask-"

Embry descended upon her, and she flinched as his mouth collided hard with hers. He sprung back the next second looking equal parts horrified and embarrassed. "Sorry…" he whispered, taking a huge step back, and avoiding her eyes.

Alex didn't let him go far, reaching out and catching him by the shoulder. He stilled, and slowly, she stretched herself up on her toes, willing him to close the rest of the distance between them. "It's okay." She murmured, heart beating quickly. Embry lowered his head again, and she pressed her lips to his, just once, quickly – but far less violently than before. She giggled, involuntarily, making Embry's eyes go wide. "Shut up!" she told him, pressing a hand to his chest.

"Can we do that again?" he asked, and she nodded, with another nervous giggle.

This time, it was slower, and Alex shut her eyes, trying to feel her way. He was hot against her, hands shaking slightly where he had placed them on her hips – and she had an odd flash of déjà vu from the dance. Kissing Embry was…_weird._ Not bad – but she couldn't be entirely sure, because she'd never kissed anyone before – but it wasn't what she had been expecting. His lips moved just slightly against hers, and it made her stomach flip and arch a little involuntarily into him.

He made a noise, and broke away, eyes wide again and breathing a little hard. She felt a little breathless herself. "Whoa." He blinked down at her, and she could see herself reflected in his blown pupils. "I'm- well. Why didn't we-?" Alex dragged him back down, and he went willingly. Above them, thunder rolled again, and the sky split – rain bucketing down upon them. Alex just pressed herself closer, and it was only when she shivered, cold settling into her skin as her hoodie got soaked through, did Embry pull away again. "We should get inside before you drown."

He was grinning, and looked entirely unaffected by the rain. Alex shuddered again. "Might be a good idea." She admitted, as her teeth began to chatter.

He laughed, loud and boisterous, and drew her under his arm. "C'mon." she tried to keep pace with his brisk jog, but slipped a few times on the stones and then slick forest floor. "Can I?" Embry asked her suddenly, and she stopped, still feeling a little stupid.

"What-? _EMBRY_!" She cried, as her feet were swept out from under her, Embry scooping her up like she was a child and cradling her easily. "You, you, you, _caveman!"_ she managed finally as he began to run through the trees again.

"You're far too slow, Alex, and I'd actually like to eat lunch today." He told her laughingly. Alex threw her head back dramatically, smacking herself on his bicep. She rolled her eyes. _Ridiculous_. She couldn't help but smile.


	15. Mine: Chapter 14

"Where were you yesterday?" Quil turned in his seat to look back at her.

"I was at- uhh," Alex cut herself off nervously. "I was sick."

Jacob snorted. "Really? Because when we came to get you, Kitty said you weren't in bed."

Alex panicked. "Oh, that's-that's weird."

_Dammit. _

Jacob levelled her a piercing look through the mirror, and for a moment, something shifted behind his pretty chocolate eyes. Alex felt pinned, stuck in place, unable to break his gaze through a sudden heavy guilt. Then, he blinked, rolled his eyes and scowled out of the window away from her. "Yeah, whatever."

Alex rolled her own eyes, and thumped back in her seat, irrationally angry too. She knew she was in the wrong; she should have called them, should probably apologize, but whatever bad mood had settled over her made her unwilling to cave.

Her and Jacob's irritation with each other and the world in general carried through the day – and Alex felt a little bad as Quil tried to hide his relieved expression when she told him she'd get her own way home. It would save him dealing with Alex _and_ Jacob, and the slightly bitter bickering that had taken place during the day.

Alex didn't know what it was about Jacob that was getting under her skin these days, but it _sucked._

Well, _he_ sucked.

She chewed viciously on the now-flavourless piece of gum she'd wheedled out of a classmate, and headed doggedly towards Paul's beat-up truck that was waiting for her in the parking lot. She could make out her sister's small form next to the hulking wolf, and resisted the urge to turn right back around to skip out on the inevitable lecture.

Sure enough, the second she got into the back and had closed the door, Kitty twisted around in her seat with a furious glare on her pretty face. "You _skipped_ school to hang out with Embry?"

Alex crossed her arms, and muttered "_whipped" _so quietly that only Paul could hear it. He grumbled something, but neither sister spared him a look. "So, what, Kitty? He needed me! He's going through something."

Kitty made a frustrated noise. "You can't just skip out on your education for your _boyfriend!_ It's very important to do well, and that starts early, Alex – not to mention _lying_ to mom and dad-"

"You did." Alex interrupted mulishly. Kitty blinked, and looked a little taken aback. "You did _all_ of that first, big sis – I'm just following your _shining _example." It was mean, and Kitty sunk back around, back not before Alex saw the hurt on her face. Paul let out a growl, and shot Alex a quick look in the mirror that said _stop._ But it seemed like Alex was on a particularly cruel roll today, because she didn't stop; "Why can't I do the same?"

"You know it's different, Alex-" Paul tried, but Alex pounced on his statement like it was prey.

"Why? Because you guys are _Imprinted?_ Because you guys have your little bond that means you're above all criticism?" Alex snorted. "Just because Embry and I aren't _tied_ together doesn't mean he means any less to me. He's my _best_ friend, and I have just as much a right to be there as _anyone_ else."

"Alex, **_enough_**." Paul said, and there was a weight behind his voice that made her stomach twist itself in knots, but wasn't enough to stop herself from going. _Wow – she was really going for the kill today, wasn't she?_ She thought in self-disgust.

"What? Don't like me talking about your _oh so holy bond? _Newsflash – it's unnatural, and honestly, a little creepy, so I won't-"

Paul slammed on the breaks, and Alex shut up as she noticed his trembling hands. It was as if she was faraway for a moment, as if the anger swirling in her gut – fighting at the weight of Paul's words, and her own guilt – was not her own. "Out, Alex." Paul said quietly, and Alex noticed that Kitty was very still and very pale, and Paul's eyes didn't leave her sister's form. "**_Out._**" He said again, with that same weight, and Alex got out of the truck.

Paul hadn't left her in the middle of nowhere or anything, in fact she was only a few hundred meters from Emily and Sam's driveway – but the sick feeling that settled over her as the truck drove off made her feel just as bad as if she had been dumped in the gutter hundreds of miles away. Burning with shame, she slowly made her way towards the house, pausing at the lip of the gravel driveway. She _really_ didn't want to go in there.

She was angry, guilty, and _tired_ – and honestly wasn't sure why.

Alex didn't want to see all the hurt and disappointment she had caused, and because she was a fucking _coward_, she kept walking along the road, until she found a slightly cleared way into the dense trees. She tramped through the forest, unable to appreciate the peace of it all, and it was only after she tripped up on her second root, or rock, or _whatever_\- did she finally stop, sit, and take stock.

This patch of the woods wasn't unfamiliar to her, and she thought she could still find her way back to the house without going back to the road. It was quiet; the constant presence of so many large predators did a pretty good job of scaring off a good majority of forest fauna. The birds still sang, however, and they were launching into their evening sonnet with vigour. Alex closed her eyes and just _listened._

* * *

_The birds were always noisy, but around the day's last light, they always grew more feverous – eager to sing one last time. To her, it seemed louder than usual this time, her ears sensitive; sensitive to pick up on the other sounds of the forest. _

_Running felt good. It felt so good, that she wasn't sure how she had ever gone without it; without it like this. Her body felt different, acing in places she wasn't used to aching, but it was stronger. And it grew stronger._

**_Alex hasn't made it inside._**

_The voice was not her own, and though it was startling that it was from inside her head, she recognised it. Sam._

**_Can you find her?_**

_She was confused. She was here, and yet she was not; because a sudden determination and worry had filled her that was not her own – and she had picked up a pace that was impossible, the earth blurring beneath her paws. _

**_Of course I can._**

_She could smell… smell herself. Smell herself in a way that was impossible; because the scent was complex in a way that couldn't be simply due to the deodorant she used, or her brand of shampoo, but those things were helpful – and she had wheeled around suddenly, and was following the scent that was her and yet not her in a way she recognised. _

_She slowed, quieted her footsteps, because the scent of herself was stronger now, and when she entered a small clearing, walked around the side of a smooth boulder – she looked down-_

_She looked down on her own body, and a sudden sensation of wrongness and nausea flooded her not body, because how could she be here and there at the same time, and the her on the forest floor twitched and stirred-_

* * *

Alex woke up looking into her own eyes, and screamed.

Embry flinched back, dancing away from her with a whine, and lowering himself to the ground – ears flattening against his head, eyes panicked.

Alex was too busy retching into the grass to reassure him, because she was _sick and confused and horrified-_

"Alex, hey, what's wrong?" A large hand was suddenly between her shoulder blades, and Alex gagged again at the faint smell of _boy_ that told her it was Embry, the reminder of the intense scents she had just been living _too much_. "Alex, _please_ tell me what's happening! Y-you're freaking me out…" Embry's voice stuttered, and Alex closed her eyes, trying to get herself under control.

_It was real. It had all been real._

That was the only coherent thought bouncing around in her brain. Embry finding her in the forest, Paul shifting in the woods behind Jacob's house, the _Volturi-_

Embry whined again, and pulled her closer. "I can tell you're scared, Al, baby, _please…"_

Alex wiped her mouth shakily, and turned to face him. "Em, I need you." She whispered, barely able to string a sentence together. Embry was only half-dressed, the obvious panic to get over to her after he had Unphased evident in his unbuttoned shorts and worried eyes. She took a deep breath, pressing into his loose grip. "I need you to take me to Sam, and I need you to ask him to call Billy Black."

Embry nodded silently, and stood, backing away with his eyes on her until he had to duck behind a tree. A second later, a whimpering Embry moved towards her on all fours, massive head bent low as he snuffled at her worriedly. She forced herself to her feet, forced a smile onto her face, and wrapped her arms around his neck as best she could. He let her embrace him for a moment, before he took a step back and knelt before her, obviously eager to get back to Sam, back to the Alpha who would know what to do.

* * *

Sam watched Alex slide off Embry's back and keep pace smoothly. She looked wan, sick, and even from here he could smell that she had been. She looked small next to Embry – and again, he felt the same pseudo pride and fear rise in him. She had never shown any anxiety around the wolves, and though it just displayed her trust, it was also a mark of her own foolishness. They were _dangerous_, no matter what the Imprints said, no matter what Alex did.

Sam nodded to Embry, who split dutifully from Alex's side and ran off to Unphase._ Good._ Embry was rational, steady – and even with the panic that had flooded the pack mind when he had found Alex, when he had relayed her message – he was controlled. Truthfully, though he would never admit as such; Alex was beginning to worry him more than his newest pup.

"Billy's on the phone, Alex." Sam told her, as she began to crest the stairs. He followed her inside, stifling the questions he had as the tall girl made her way to the awaiting phone. She had no eyes for the others in the room, all just as worried as he.

Alex was strong; and not just in a traditional sense, though Sam could see that too – despite her bout in the hospital – he could _feel_ it from her. He couldn't explain it, just like he couldn't explain the pack hierarchy, his own power beyond the obvious. Perhaps it was why she didn't fear the wolves as she should, perhaps why, innately he wasn't truly worried for her when she played and ran amongst them. But she was too rigid in her strength, and Sam was fearful that she was snapping.

"_Alexandra – what's wrong, child?"_

He settled against the kitchen island to listen, absently drawing Emily into his arms, feeling her own distress as keenly as his own. "I've been having dreams, and Billy, I _know_ it sounds crazy – but I don't think they were dreams. Do you remember what you told me about…" she trailed off, and curled, almost self-consciously around the phone. But they couldn't afford privacy, not when it concerned one of their own.

One of their own.

Sam wondered when he had stopped making the distinction between Alex being an Imprint's sister, to Alex being a friend of the Pack, to Alex _being_ Pack. He supposed it didn't really matter, not when his subconscious had clearly decided some time ago. His wolf; usually dormant, in a state of meditation, yawned in agreement. _Yes, the Young One was Pack. _He told Sam, and returned again to his slumber.

"About the Dream Walkers?" Alex whispered, and Sam's head snapped up.

That was old legend. Very _old_. The last Dream Walker had died before Taha Aki; his first wife's passing seemingly marking an end to the line of Quileute Dream Walkers. Sam knew though, that such an ability couldn't have been tied to only their Tribe; near every culture, every religion had their own ideals and beliefs about dream walking. It didn't explain why Alex, a girl with no apparent ties to the Quileute, was asking about it.

"_Yes, I do."_ Billy said, patient, always patient. "_What have you been dreaming about, Alex?"_

"I've seen- I mean," Alex turned to look at them, and there was a flush of embarrassment on her cheeks. "It doesn't happen all the time, I swear!"

"_You can tell me, child." _

Alex was flushing, though she still looked afraid. "I've been inside their heads." She admitted finally. They were all silent. "At first I thought I was just… _dreaming. _I've dreamt about the forest, about running before – but not like this." She had closed her eyes. "At first, I mean, that dream about…about the Volturi. That I think started it all. And then it got stranger, because I _was_ Paul. It was just in the afternoon, outside your house. You guys were talking about the Cullens destroying those leeches that had been causing trouble. I think-"

"You said my name." Paul interrupted her, giving up any illusion of privacy. "I _knew_ that something weird happened." A slow mischief was spreading across his face. "Y'know, I was _naked-"_

Alex let out a whimper, and Sam sent Paul a killing look. "Paul." Paul snapped his mouth shut, and sunk back into the couch, into Kitty.

"_And today?"_ Billy asked.

"Today, I was Embry. Or, I don't know, I saw through his eyes – but I could _feel_ everything too. Like it was _my_ body, but then I – I mean _he_ found me. My real body. And then I woke up, and he was standing over me." Alex said. Embry, who had entered a short while ago, looked distressed.

"_Alex, try not to worry."_ Billy assured her, but Sam thought Billy was the one who sounded worried. "_The Council will have a meeting, and work out the best course of action."_

Alex let out another small sound. "I'm not in trouble, am I?" she asked in a small voice, and it was very hard for Sam to not take a step towards her, and from the looks on the other wolves, they were struggling too.

"_Of course not." _Now, Billy was back to his normal assurance. "_We just need to…be careful. Gather some information. But you are not in trouble."_

Alex nodded, though Billy couldn't see it. "Thank you, Billy." She whispered.

"_I'll be in touch, soon, Alexandra. Stay safe." _Billy hung up first, but Alex held onto the phone for a moment longer before she hung up, and Sam could tell she was steeling herself to face them.

When she finally faced the room, she looked distraught, humiliated and fearful. It was a distressing look on the usually acerbic girl. "I'm really sorry." She said at large, and looked down, blinking hard. "I didn't think it was-" Emily had already taken a step towards the girl, but Embry was faster, and he had Alex in his arms – cutting her off.

"It's okay." He mumbled, and Sam watched as Alex clung to Embry desperately. "You don't need to apologise. We'll work it out." Alex made a noise, and Embry tightened his grip.

"Embry's right, Alex." Sam said finally, and Alex stiffened, keeping her face buried. "We just want to help."

"You're not mad?" Alex asked, face peaking out from under Embry's armpit.

Sam shook his head with a smile. "Not at you. I mean, _knowing_ about all this might have been-" Emily elbowed him, and he winced. "No."

Paul coughed. "But yes, we're still mad about earlier." He piped up from the couch. Alex's face drooped again.

"I'm sorry, Kitty." She said, and her sister looked at her. Sam knew the sisters were about as similar as chalk and cheese, but the small soft look that Alex got when she thought no one was looking was her sister's, through and through. Kitty smiled at her sister gently.

"It's okay, Alex."

Paul coughed. "And what about me? I'm the one who Imprinted."

Sam didn't particularly want more context to whatever argument had started this whole thing, but Paul's comment was enough to make him sigh and shake his head. "You're the one who _benefitted_, you mean?" Alex bit back, sounding a little more like her old self.

"You-" Paul began, but Kitty's quiet throat-clearing made him drop back with a beatific smile. "Yes. You're perfectly right."

Sam let Embry and Alex sneak out when they thought the room was preoccupied, keeping an ear out for the pair as they walked hand in hand away from the house. They made an odd couple, Sam thought, one cool and one hot; but they seemed content. Sam would have to have been deaf, blind and stupid to miss the friendship between them – and a romantic relationship with that to build off had to have been not half bad. Sure, Embry _did_ think about Alex a lot – but he had no ground to stand on, nor did the other wolves, what with their Imprints taking up a majority of their own consciousness.

Sam hugged Emily a little closer, pressing a kiss to her questioning mouth.

_He wouldn't have it any other way._


	16. Mine: Chapter 15

It turned out the Council's idea of the best course of action was to attempt to _harness_ whatever was going on with her. Sam had laid it out to her in much the same way she imagined he told brand new wolves what the deal was, and it just left her more anxious than she'd started.

Apparently, she could progress to doing it at will – which also included not doing it _all_ at will. She had to let it happen to make it stop. It meant ditching her magic-sleepy-time pills, and it meant going back to the unsettled state she had been in before her little hospital stint. It meant that, much like Embry, Alex was given a sanction to get out of school. Her parents had been confused, and on the verge of calling the Council, though who to call and what to say had stumped them enough that they let it happen without much complaint.

The school had been informed she would be taking a Council approved leave of absence, and whilst it did get her out of attendance, it didn't get her out of homework. For the first few days, she had tried to maintain _some_ kind of circadian rhythm, but as her spotty insomnia returned, she was forced to abandon the notion, and whenever she felt tired, she slept – trying not to force her body into it. It meant that she was awake, bent over a difficult math worksheet, when at three in the morning, she heard something in her yard.

She straightened, unsure if it was her imagination. Alex squinted through her window, turning her lamp off to see better. For a moment, it was still, but when a furred muzzle poked tentatively through the tree line, she grinned – pushing herself away from her desk and hurrying quietly downstairs.

Embry met her in the middle of the yard, wagging his tail and darting his tongue out to lick over her face. She sputtered and laughed. "Yeah, I'm going crazy too." She told him, and stroked the short fur right over the bridge of his nose. He sneezed at the contact, and she laughed again. "How's wolfy business?" She asked quietly. "Sam's really got you out this late?"

A definitively guilty look was her answer, and she sighed. "If he doesn't know yet, he'll know whenever he phases in." Embry made a gesture as close to a shrug as she had seen from a wolf, before he nudged her – clearly asking the same. She leant against him, and he supported her weight easily. "I'm tired. Each time I think I'm dreaming, I'm not, and each time I think I'm _Walking_, or whatever, I'm not." She resisted the urge to stomp her foot. "I don't know how to control it."

Embry nudged her with his big head, with a little too much force, and she wheeled for balance whilst he lowered his ears in apology. "It's okay, Em." She told him, and moved back to him. He was so much stronger than her now. It should have frightened her, should have made her keep her distance, be watchful.

But Alex didn't see the wolf, not really, didn't see his new bulk, new height. She only saw Embry. And Embry would never hurt her. None of them would. Even when Paul was furious, when Jared was impatient, when Sam was fed up – when the little cracks shone through their impressive control – even then, she was unafraid. Perhaps she was just stupid. Maybe she had no sense of self preservation.

No.

She just trusted them.

And they seemed to trust her. They trusted her enough to want her to do this, they trusted her enough to _be in their heads_. Maybe it wasn't much to a wolf used to sharing his every thought with the others, but to her, it meant more than she could fully express.

Embry jerked up, and looked to the woods behind him with a faint whine. Alex smirked. "Busted!" she told him. He headbutted her in the gut, albeit much softer than the last time, and she rubbed his cheek one last time before he turned and slipped back into the woods.

Alex lingered in the yard, trying to work out if she was feeling a little fuzzy because she was happy, or because she was tired. When she yawned, she turned in place, and _almost _ran back to her room – remembering to keep to a walk just in time, trying to keep her heartrate down.

When she lay back in bed, she tried to hold onto that thought of trust, a two-way street that she was just honoured to be walking on.

* * *

_Maybe it was because she'd felt like this before, maybe it was because of some other subconscious trigger, most likely because the silver cast of her paws was familiar. _

_Here, she separated herself._

_Not her paws. His paws._

_This time when she slipped into Paul, she could recognise the way his form felt. She felt calm, calmer than she had the first couple of times; perhaps due to the fact that she knew where she was, who she was. Experimentally, she tried to speak to him, to call to him, as she had apparently done before. _

_Paul's thoughts remained constant, unchanging. It was strange to be aware of them as his instead of hers now. _

_He'd caught Embry in Kitty's yard, that little shit. He was lucky he hadn't been spotted, or worse, woken his Imprint. _

**_Sorry Paul._**

_And Alex was supposed to be sleeping._

**_I know._**

_And Embry better be on his way home. A distant flow of consciousness that she could attribute to Embry was flashing faint imagery; a mixture of actual words, images and emotions. It was dizzying, and she had to work for a moment to separate the two again, clinging to Paul's rather more heated fizzle._

**_I'm nearly home. I think my mom is awake._**

_Don't let her see you, she can't know. Paul was worried, and Embry was too, but all they could do was hope for the best. Then Embry's cooler trickle was gone, and Paul was alone. Alone but for her; his invisible and silent voyeur. She saw them – him – for a moment, jumping across a slow moving stream, extended in a leap and strong._

_Paul was tired, but mainly hungry. She thought Paul seemed a little less appreciative of his surroundings than Embry had been, but figured the elder wolf was probably used to it. She didn't think she could ever get used to it. _

_Paul's patrol was to last until 5:00, and when the first rays of sun split the horizon, Paul turned for home, and she was struck with a very strong pull, deep and hot and loving in her gut – as Paul headed back towards her sister. _

* * *

Alex blinked awake, a lot calmer than she had been in a while.

She still felt tired; she'd only been sleeping for a couple hours. But she felt a faint sense of pride that outweighed whatever minor exhaustion she felt. Obviously, it helped to be thinking about the object of her Walking. _Could she only Walk with the wolves? And did they have to be awake?_

Alex made a note of the questions for Billy, and headed downstairs for a bowl of cereal, managing to eat fast enough to be out of the kitchen by the time she heard the rest of the house stirring. She let herself quietly out of the house, and started the walk to the Black house, knowing by the time she got there, Jacob would be gone. It wasn't a particularly hard walk, but the day was warming up a little faster than she had expected, and by the time she crested the faint hill that his house rested atop, she had tied her sweater around her waist, and her short hair into a pathetic ponytail at the nape of her neck.

It was _humid_. The sky wasn't even clear; and she knew it would rain, despite the fact that it was warm.

As if he had sense her arrival, Billy Black was on the porch when she arrived. She waved at him, and he smiled. "Good morning, Alexandra. You seem in good spirits." He greeted her.

Alex shrugged, jogging up the stairs, and opening the door for him. "I guess. I mean, I did it last night."

Billy hummed, interested, and Alex relayed her questions to him. Billy was quiet for a moment, and began setting out two mugs. Alex didn't know how to tell him she hated tea, and she didn't see any coffee in the house – but before he started speaking, he pulled out a small tub of instant chocolate powder. _Right, Jacob._ She thought a little ruefully. It wasn't as though she was a stranger here, though being in the kitchen without her friend did feel a little strange. "I can tell you candidly that we are mostly in the dark, Alexandra." Billy said, stirring a little milk into both of the mugs. "What information we have, we are basing off what legends survived." He levelled her with a strong look. "Whilst you have you have strong ties to the Pack, there is no way to tell if Walking is limited to the Pack because of this, or simply because the wolves are receptive to other minds."

"Right." Alex said seriously, taking her mug with a smile of thanks. "So basically, we can assume… nothing?"

Billy nodded, looking thoughtful. "There should be no reason why you are Walking, Alexandra. None at all." Alex tried not to look hurt, but she must have failed, because Billy gave her a reassuring smile. "I don't say it to be cruel. You are neither an Imprint, nor are you a wolf yourself – and you are not even Quileute. And yet, to my understanding, you are as much a part of them as, say, Jared, or your sister."

Alex shook her head. She hadn't been looking for, like, a way into the Pack. She knew they _liked_ her to some degree, like one liked a mildly amusing and annoying pet, else she'd have been shunted aside a long time ago, and yeah – most of her connection to the Pack stemmed from an accidental exposure, and her sister, and now her boyfriend. "No, I know that's not the case, Billy. I get that-"

"It is." Billy was frowning. "For reasons unknown to me, and to anyone else, the wolves claim you, Alexandra Faye."

* * *

"Is it true?"

Sam looked up from the broken kitchen mixer he was tinkering with. Alex eyed the dismantled thing, before she affixed her eyes on the Alpha sitting peacefully at his kitchen table. He didn't look surprised at her arrival; how could he have been, when he could hear, see and smell things beyond her comprehension.

"What, Alex?" he asked her, not seeming the least bit put out by her rude interruption. Alex figured that after dealing with Paul, Sam was probably equipped to deal with anything.

"About you guys. Like, the Pack." Sam did put his screwdriver down at that. Alex crossed her arms in his front doorframe, wondering why she was feeling confrontational.

Sam sighed. "You're going to need to be a _little_ more specific, Alex. Do you want something to eat?" Alex fixated on the casual rebuke, on the casual drive to care for her tacked onto the end. Care. Care and protection. That was what had always been offered to her here, _always._ When did it stop being friendly, and becoming obligation? When did it start to become about the Pack?

"Billy told me that I'm Pack." Alex said, and Sam rubbed at his chest, eyes glazing over for a moment. It was gesture she'd seen before, and she _still_ didn't know what it meant. Finally, Sam nodded silently. "What? How?" Alex demanded.

Sam looked suddenly tired. "I don't _know_, Alex. All of this stuff with you makes _no sense_." At her faint flinch, he looked apologetic. "I'm sorry, Al. Would you come and sit?" Alex debated, and then shrugged. It didn't look like she was going to be getting concrete answers anywhere, but Emily's was a good enough place to hang as any. Sam, however, wasn't finished. He had crossed his arms and was giving her a considering look. "You've been a part of our lives since Kitty and Paul Imprinted, whether focally or not. Kitty's family is important. Then you found out, and integrated yourself here. I didn't want that, and neither did the Council." The blunt admission made Alex pang with hurt. "Not that I didn't enjoy your company, Alex," he said with a faint wince and a smile. Alex figured she deserved that one, "But you were still, ultimately, an outsider. You knew our secret, and your sister was your only legitimate tie to us."

"Dangerous." Alex realised, and felt a pang of guilt for all the stress she had caused. _She hadn't known, but it didn't make it better._

Sam nodded. "But Paul kept bringing you around, and you just got _on_ with the wolves. Emily adores you, Kim thinks you're a riot and Kitty loves you. I don't know when it happened, but after a while, I think we – me and Jared, that is – just… got over it." Alex snorted, and Sam grinned, suddenly looking younger, looking his age. "You grew on us like a rash, and eventually we succumbed."

"You've been spending too much time with Paul." Alex told him.

Sam shrugged, looking serious. "And then I realised my wolf, that _I_ saw you just the way I saw Kim, or Kitty, to an extent. It's different with them, they're Imprints, which mean something different, but Alex, trust me when I say that you are Pack. For some reason, somehow. You are Pack."

Alex laughed slightly. "Everyone keeps saying that despairingly." She couldn't help the faint bitter edge creep into her voice.

Sam smiled gently, parentally. "Only because we want to know why. Not because of who."

Alex tried not to look pleased, and when Sam's smile grew knowing, stood up to flee to the fridge. Hopefully Emily had some leftovers tucked away somewhere.


	17. Mine: Chapter 16

Embry and Alex went back to school on the same day, and it was lucky they had – because Alex was pretty sure this whole mess would have been a lot worse if she hadn't been there. As it was though, she was also sure that her being there had only stoked the fire. The day had started off badly; and really, Alex and Embry should have taken the horrid weather as the bad omen it was.

* * *

"Morning." Embry greeted her as she hurriedly slid into his car, slamming the door behind her to fend off the torrential rain. She grimaced, soaked from just the short run down her driveway.

"Hey, Em." Alex plastered a smile onto her face anyway, and just because she could, leant across the console to press a kiss to Embry's cheek. He looked… not great. Alex thought he looked more terrified than nervous, but it was more than understandable. "How are you feeling?"

Embry hunched over his wheel a little, as if it could make his now hulking form any smaller. "Like shit. I couldn't sleep all last night." He admitted, and Alex ran her fingers over the buzzed hair at the nape of his neck. He closed his eyes briefly before refocusing on the road. "I don't know what I'm going to do."

Alex kept her eyes on his profile, her fingers at his neck. She'd seen Sam do the same for the others when they got worked up. Not that she had any real Alpha-wolf mojo to calm him, but she figured the contact might help anyway. "We'll work it out. If it doesn't go well, then we'll figure something else out, okay?" Embry had loosened slightly at the 'we,' and Alex let go of him in favour of intertwining her fingers with his free hand.

Quil and Jacob were already at school, as Alex deduced from spotting Jacob's truck in the parking lot, and she knew Embry had seen it too. He stiffened as they got out and walked past it. "I'm cool." He told her, before she could even ask. Then he wrinkled his nose. "Jesus, high school stinks. Literally."

Alex laughed, and hooked her arm with his. "Poor baby…" she teased him, "We'll just have to plug your nose in gym."

Embry made a low noise as they approached their lockers. "I'm not allowed to go to gym, at least, not until after I…" he trailed off, uncomfortable. Alex made an understanding noise.

"Sorry, Em." She told him, as he began to slowly get his books out, noting how careful he was being. Her heart ached. Embry had always been calm, sure, but Alex knew it had been his own way of having – even if was over his own emotions – something he could control that his mother couldn't dabble in or take from him. It must be killing him, having this…_thing_ that was testing the bounds of his limits. Even his own strength; it wasn't his own anymore.

But Alex had faith in him. Embry was determinedly and infallibly his own person, and no amount of physical change would change _him._

They had almost made it to class without incident, when Justin Hailey, a good-looking and incredibly douchey senior passed between them. Justin had known her sister, and Alex had known that he was an asshole even before he had stood her sister up and had tried to essentially date-raped her, and so Alex – who had never been good at keeping her feelings to herself, especially the negative ones – had been outwardly hateful and derogatory to the popular senior and his popular crowd since she'd seen his face the next week. Of course, Justin didn't care, but it did mean that Justin knew who she was too.

"Welcome back, Call, I think your boyfriends missed you." Justin said mockingly.

Banging into Embry deliberately, though Justin was the one who resounded and winced, he then smacked Alex's ass, and slapped his equally awful friends high fives as they tried to continue down the hall.

Key word: _tried._

Embry had Justin by the back of his shirt, stopping him short with a gurgle and spinning him around, before Justin could take another step. Alex panicked as she realised Embry was _growling_, right there in the corridor for everyone to see, and that tremors were beginning to race up his body. Though part of her wanted _nothing_ more than to continue to watch Justin's eyes bug out of his face with fear, the more sensible part of her knew they had to keep moving, _now._

"Embry!" Alex hissed, tugging on his other arm, both to pull him away and to try and hide his shaking limb. "Em, put him down – c'mon, he's not worth it." Justin made a choking noise when Embry lifted him a little off the ground, and now his friends were starting to look scared too. Alex slapped at Embry's shoulder, moving around to plaster herself to his front and shove at him. "Em, _please_, baby…" she whispered.

His eyes slid to her briefly, and then he closed his eyes, looking deeply regretful for a moment, before anger flared again. But he put Justin down on his feet, and even though Embry shoved him roughly enough to send him sprawling, Alex could feel Embry's shaking slow. "Sorry." He muttered lowly, unmoving; eyes still fixed on Justin as he hurried away. The hall was beginning to pick up motion again, though there were whispers and wide eyes.

Alex sighed, and pressed her forehead against his chest for a moment before she stood straight again. "It's okay." Embry made a small unhappy noise, and she took his hand, and smiled at him. "Let's get to class."

The first half of the day was a little smoother after that, and Embry only had the shakes once during math when one of their classmates inferred they'd both been out sick from mono. Alex personally thought it had been funny, but she'd kept her foot in the small of Embry's back anyway, reaching under her desk to touch him.

But then it was lunch, which meant Jacob and Quil.

Embry was growing paler by the second, and Alex followed him worriedly as he headed to the cafeteria. It was a riot of noise and sensation, and Alex thought about just how overwhelmed Embry must have been, scanning the tables outside for spots, when Embry stiffened.

"Em! Dude, where have you been!" Quil's sudden enthusiastic greeting startled both of them, Embry taking an involuntary step back, and giving Alex a clear view of the way Quil's happy face fell at the motion. Jacob's own smile was beginning to droop.

"You're huge, Embry." Jacob tried for teasing, tried to smile again. "Did you O.D. on steroids or something?"

Embry shook his head, but seemed to be struck mute. Alex moved to his side, and as she did, her two friends' eyes fell on her, but Alex was distracted. Jacob had grown again, and though Embry was still taller than him, in his newly shifted body, Jacob had nearly caught him. She frowned. "What?" Jacob asked her, smile completely gone. "Were you sick too?" Despite the snappish tone, which made Embry lower his head, his eyes were warm with real concern. Whatever problem was between them, and Alex knew it was _something_ – she and Jacob had been off since the dance – he was still her friend. Still _their_ friend. And he cared.

"Yeah." She said shortly. "We were." She answered for the both of them.

Quil grinned, a little more uncertainly. "Did you guys catch a freaky sex disease? Ew."

Alex smiled slightly, and kicked out at Quil. "Shut it."

They were quiet for another long moment, Quil and Jacob both looking at Embry, Embry still looking determinedly at the ground, and Alex looking at the lunch line. "Em – did something happ-"

"Let's get lunch." Embry said suddenly, and Quil's eyes widened. "Alex?" he asked, lowering his voice a little, and giving her a pleading look.

"Yeah, babe." She answered him automatically, and took his hand. Quil's eyes widened further and he looked between them.

"Was it _actually_ a freaky sex disease?" he asked wonderingly.

Alex scowled at him. "I said _shut it_, Quil."

"What was it then?" Jacob spoke up suddenly, and Embry shook once. Alex tightened her grip on him, and started to head for the back of the line, pushing Embry ahead of her so she could be a slight buffer. Jacob followed them, still looking curious. "I mean, you both got it right?"

Embry was looking very hard at the burnt looking fries, and Alex looked very hard at Jacob. "Yeah, we did Jacob – but we're better and we're here, okay?"

"Okay, jeez – I was just asking, Alex." Jacob rolled his eyes. "I'm glad you guys are back." He reached over her, and slugged Embry playfully in the shoulder. "Ow, shit!" he winced, and withdrew his hand, looking at Embry.

Embry looked frantic again. "I'm sorry!" he apologized.

Jacob shook his head, "It's- it's not your fault, man." But he still looked a little weirded out, and Embry caught it, and he turned miserably back to the lunch lady.

They were an awkward, unhappy foursome as they sat around the lunch table, Embry inhaling his lunch at a speed that made Quil and Jacob stare, Alex rolling her eyes at them, and sliding her own lunch over to him, ignoring his quiet protest. Quil tried to crack a few jokes, but when no one laughed, he eventually quietened too. Alex ignored her own stomach rumbling, Embry giving her an apologetic look, and took his hand under the table again. Jacob caught the motion, and snorted.

"Look, if you guys wanted some alone time, then you could have just said." Jacob said angrily, and stood. Quil looked confused, as Jacob hauled him up too. "C'mon, Quil, we better leave them be."

Alex made to stand, to yell furiously after them, but Embry's grip tightened, and she looked down at him. "What, Em? He's being _stupid_."

"Just leave it." Embry whispered. "It's- it's too difficult." He said finally, heartbroken.

Alex sat, but turned to straddle the bench so she could face him. "Embry, are you sure? I don't care what Sam said, if you want to hang out with them, we can. We'll just be careful."

Embry looked momentarily angry. "Sam gave me a gag order. I couldn't say anything if I wanted to." Alex scowled, filing away the knowledge. Embry shook his head. "It hurts their feelings, and I hate feeling like I can't talk to them. And I _hurt_ Jake, Alex."

Alex snorted. "Pretty sure _he_ punched you, not the other way around." At Embry's unimpressed look, she relented. "Fine. For the record, I'm offended that you don't care about hurting me." She said teasingly.

Embry looked stricken, "No, Alex – that's not it at all, I-"

Alex scooted closer to him, raising her hand to place on his shoulder, running her thumb down the side of his neck. "_Relax_, Em." She told him. "I _know_ you won't."

Embry sighed. "I'm so afraid of breaking everything I touch, Alex, I hate it."

Alex moved closer still, her knees touching his own, and brought her arms around him. Embry returned her embrace, and to the outside, Alex hoped it just looked like a bit of PDA, hoping the student body couldn't see how desperately Embry was clutching at her.

* * *

In the parking lot, Alex and Embry had almost made it to his truck, but when Embry sighed, and muttered; "_Jacob."_ Alex got the feeling that their no-good-very-bad day was about to get worse.

"Hey! Guys, wait up."

Embry had always been more forgiving than Alex, and so he turned at their friend's voice. Alex, however, took her time, and when she finally met Jacob's hopeful smile, it was with a terrifying scowl. Jacob blinked at her. "Um. I just wanted to say sorry. About lunch."

"Fuck you." Alex told him, and Embry put a hand on her shoulder.

Jacob rolled his eyes. "Could you drop the bad-ass act for one second, Alex? I'm trying to fucking apologize."

Quil, who had ambled over with a grin, flinched at Jacob's tone. "Whoa, dude."

Alex just made a wordless noise of anger. "Well, _stellar_ job, Jacob. You're coming across really _remorseful._"

"Alex." Embry said quietly, at the same time Quil exclaimed again. "It's fine, Jacob." Embry told him, and Jacob smiled, though his eyes were hot.

Alex wasn't done. "In fact, you seem super remorseful for all the shit you've been giving me recently, too. Thanks."

Jacob gave her a furious look. "Oh – yeah, because you've been such an _angel_, Alex."

"Guys…" Quil said worriedly. Both Alex and Jacob ignored him.

"Oh, _bite me, _Jacob – you've been an asshole since _May._" Alex told him. Jacob looked called out for a moment, but only a moment, because in the next second he was back to angry.

"I don't know what you're talking about. You've been kind of a bitch today, Alex – but notice how _I'm _apologizing?" He spat, and Alex took a furious step towards him.

Embry's arm snaked around her waist, keeping her still, even as she tugged at him. "Don't give me that _shit-!"_

"Have you ever considered that maybe you're just not pleasant to be around?" Jacob told her, suddenly cold.

Alex went very still, and Quil gave them all distraught looks, before turning on his heel and walking off. Alex watched him go, suddenly impossibly guilty, as their conversation came back to her; the promise she had made Quil what felt like a lifetime ago. A promise that _she_ had just broken.

_"…I don't feel like we're as close anymore..." _

_"…I promise that things won't change, okay...?"_

Alex took another step, to try and go after her friend – but Embry misconstrued her movement – and the next thing she knew, she had been slung over his shoulder as he marched back to the truck. "Enough, Alex." He told her quietly, opening the door with one hand and sitting her gently in the seat before moving around to the driver's side. Alex stared at Jacob's unmoving form. He didn't seem to realise he was alone, eyes far away, hands balled into fists. She looked away from him.

Something that had been a little wrong, a little bent out of shape between them had snapped.

Embry drove her home, politely pretending he couldn't hear her quiet sniffles as she cried, face turned to the forest out of the window. When they got to her house, he leant over and kissed her, soft and brief. It made Alex want to cry again. She headed up to her room, ignoring her dad's holler of hello and her sister's head poking out of her room, slamming her door behind her in the universal warning of _leave me alone._

And yes.

Yes, she _had_ considered that she was unpleasant to be around. And yes, she knew she _was_.

Alex buried her face in her pillow, pretending she wasn't still crying, pretending that Jacob's words didn't hurt as much as they did, pretending that things weren't falling apart and it was her fault.

Alex was mean. She was mean, and bitter, and sometimes cruel. She was angry and loud and spiteful. She didn't know when to shut up or stop, and she didn't know how to tell someone that she loved them. Honestly, Alex didn't want to be around herself either. She wasn't _really_ mad at Jacob for saying what he had. Because he was right – and maybe he'd just gotten sick of her. Maybe at the dance, he'd just had an epiphany or something. Maybe he'd been trying to drop her as a friend for a while. She should add _'doesn't know how to take a hint'_ to her very long list of faults.

Alex didn't even know how to go about making amends to Quil – wasn't even sure if she could at this point. And Embry – god, Embry – she'd just gone and made his life even more complicated.

Alex let out a cry into her pillow, hoping it would strangle the sound, muffle the horrid feelings.

* * *

_The moon was encumbered by the still heavy cloud cover, and so the world was in darkness. But not for her. She could see the world around her in near perfect detail, crystal clear through her eyes, every sense finely tuned to pick apart her surroundings. _

_Then she became aware of the pace she was moving at, caught a glimpse of her – no – his paws, and tuned into the consciousness that was bubbling around her. _

_Jared was less concerned with his surroundings than he was about Kim. Kim, Kim, Kim, Kim – she was at the forefront of everything. She marvelled at the sheer brilliance of his adoration. Kim was mad at him, Kim had thrown a shoe at him, Kim was right to be mad – he had totally forgotten about her dad's birthday – he was such an idiot. Patrol wouldn't be over for another few hours, so he had another few hours to come up with an apology. He wished his patrol was over now. He just wanted Kim, Kim, Kim-_

_She tuned him out, tried to at least, and succeeded in at least ignoring him. Instead, she watched the wood through his incredible eyes. She could tell now, that the wolves were not one and the same in their abilities. Jared seemed to be able to see better than the others; just as Embry seemed to be faster, Paul strong. She wondered what about Sam would be unique-_

_She slid._

_She slid in a dizzy mess of colour and sensation, and felt sick-_

* * *

Alex twitched, feeling her Walk slipping from her, and swallowed against the nausea in her gut, keeping her eyes closed-

* * *

_She was watching Emily, eyes lingering on her absent, careful movements as she folded pastry into shapes._

_This time, this time, she was on two legs._

_This time – in the reflection in the window behind Emily, she watched as she ruffled her, no, his hair – he was thinking about Jared and Kim too. Kim had called Emily. Poor Jared, he was in for it._

_SAM._

_They startled, Sam standing up so fast that his chair fell over, Emily jumping in fright, Sam turning to catch someone who wasn't even there-_

_She was slipping again, even as he thought about her;_

**_Alex? Is that-_**

* * *

"Damn." Alex blinked open her eyes, still feeling nauseous and oddly shaky.

From her schoolbag, her phone started ringing. She had a feeling she knew who it would be – but even so, she rolled off the bed, standing unsteadily and fishing out her phone and answering the call.

"_Alex?"_

"Who else?" She responded, trying for humour, but with how scratchy her voice was, it just sounded a little forlorn. Sam huffed a breath into the phone.

"_Was that…?" _he trailed off, sounding a little uncertain.

"Yeah, sorry." Alex said, sitting down on her bed as her legs wobbled. "I don't know what happened. Didn't even realise I fell asleep. One minute I was with Jared, and next I was with you."

"_Well, that's new."_ Sam's voice was hard to decipher. She couldn't tell if he sounded wary or excited. "_You going to tell Billy?"_

Billy was not his son, but Alex didn't really feel like talking to anyone named Black right then. "Um."

"_I can, if you want?"_ Billy offered. "_You okay, Alex?"_

Alex kind of wanted to cry again. Now, not only was she feeling emotionally destroyed, her body was being weird and it felt like she was going to throw up. "I'm fine." She said instead.

"_You've been crying." _Sam told her, and she could practically see his stern, parental gaze. Oh, but she longed for them, suddenly, achingly. She wanted a hug from Emily, and she wanted Sam to give her awkward advice – because he may have been a wolfy guru, but Alex doubted he knew how to deal with teen drama. "_Alex, I can tell you're upset."_

"I'm okay, Sam." In the background she heard Emily's soft voice, worried. "Really, Sam."

"_Okay, Alex."_ It was the tone of a man who knew she was lying, but knew she wanted to be left alone. "_Well done, I suppose. You seem to be getting better at things." _

"Yeah. I suppose." She echoed him, staring unseeingly at her wall. "I've got to go, Sam."

_"Sleep well, Alex_."

She resisted the urge to tell him that she would not be sleeping again that night.

"Goodnight, Sam. Tell Emily goodnight too."

She hung up, and threw her phone away – ignoring the ominous clatter as it landed – and collapsed backwards. _Nope. Definitely no more sleep tonight._ That was weird enough to last her several lifetimes. Alex fell asleep within the hour, and it was dreamless, painless and deep.

Alex had the best sleep she'd had in years.


	18. Mine: Chapter 17

School sucked.

Classes were fine – if she ignored the ridiculous amount of homework – and Embry was fine. He was better than fine, actually. Alex was beyond proud of him, and she knew Sam was too, and Embry knew Sam was proud, so Alex got the pleasure of watching Embry smile and hold his head a little higher. He was tired; adjusting to being a part of the patrol roster took a chunk out of his nights, and it meant confrontation with his mother, but he was good.

The part that sucked was watching Jacob and Quil eat alone. The part that sucked was Jacob pretending she didn't exist and Quil looking so damn sad. The part that sucked was Embry having to avoid them, because he didn't want to lie to them.

It sucked.

Winter break was coming, and honestly, Alex didn't think she'd ever wanted holidays to come sooner. She and Embry had plans, and she knew he wanted a break too. He deserved a break.

"Morning." Embry smiled at her as she opened the car door. He looked tired.

Alex frowned, leaning over to touch her fingers to the dark circles under his eyes. "Sam's running you ragged." She said disapprovingly as she sat back.

Embry shrugged, turning out of her driveway. "It's fine. He's just being careful, with the-" he snapped his mouth shut suddenly, colouring. Alex raised an eyebrow.

"With what?" Alex leant forwards, trying to catch his eye. Embry kept his eyes very firmly on the road. "Embry?"

He groaned. "I wasn't supposed to say anything!"

"Em…"

"Fine! Fine – it's just a vamp that we've scented a few times. Just circling the territory, and we haven't gotten a good look at it or anything, but…" he shrugged. "We gotta be careful."

Alex sat back, thinking about what Emily had said. Surely it wasn't the same leech from Seattle. "Yeah, okay."

Embry gave her a worried look. "Are you scared?"

Alex almost shook her head, but remembered that Embry could smell her moods better than she could interpret them. "A little." She admitted.

Embry hummed soothingly, reaching over to pat her hand. "We've got it handled. Plus, Sam reckons Jacob's closing to Phasing, which means we'll have more help." He looked happy about the fact, even as Alex's stomach dropped in horror.

"What?" She gasped, and Embry looked at her in confusion – because how could she not be excited at the thought of their friend joining them? "When?"

Embry shrugged. "I don't know. He just said soon, keep an eye on him at school. Aren't you glad? Then we can finally stop hiding this. You guys can make up."

Alex shuddered. "It is the last thing I want, Embry. I never wanted _any_ of you to be involved." Embry looked a little hurt, and a little understanding, but kept his mouth shut anyway. "I'm sorry." She said quietly. "But it's stolen your future and your life."

"You think I don't know that?" Embry said roughly. "You don't think that I wish that it never fucking happened? Maybe it is selfish, Alex, but _god_ – to have a friend…?" he trailed off, jaw clenched.

Alex didn't say anything. It wasn't her place to say anything, because as much as she could rage and sympathise and support and hold – she was not one of them. She was not a wolf, and though she may have been able to see through their eyes, she was not one of them, and she didn't carry the heavy weight of power and responsibility they do. All she could do was love them.

* * *

It was the last day of school, and Alex should have been excited, but all she felt was a dull dread as she coasted through the day. She surreptitiously examined Jacob, stomach dropping further as she confirmed that; yes – he was taller and broader than he had been a few days ago.

"Shit." She muttered to herself, watching as he loped towards the rabbit. He'd finished it, and as much as she wanted to congratulate him, she couldn't keep her eyes off how he struggled to fit himself into the seat. He must have been almost seven feet tall now. Guilt and worry carried towards him, and she hurried over to him. He turned to eye her even before she came into view. _Enhanced senses, check._ She thought to herself, as his nostrils flared. "Um, hey."

"Hi." Jacob said flatly, every line in his face screaming _fuck off._

"How, uh, how are you feeling?" She asked warily, aware she sounded a little crazy.

Jacob gave her an incredulous look. "What?" She swallowed and chanced a touch to his arm. He was burning to the touch. He shook her off. "What's wrong with you?" His hands, lax on his wheel, trembled just slightly, and she eyed them warily.

"Nothing. Sorry. Just, uh, you're taking it easy tonight, yeah?" she asked him.

Jacob scowled at her. "Not that it's any of your business, but I've actually got a date. With Bella." He said coldly. She floundered.

"Can you cancel?"

He looked disbelieving. "What is your issue with Bella – seriously. What, are you, like, jealous or something?" She snorted, irritated. "No. I'm not going to fucking _cancel._" With that, he gunned the engine, the delightful roaring sound filling her with nervous vibrations.

As he drove off, she fished out her phone from her pocket, jumping at the arm that wound its way suddenly around her waist. Embry looked down at her in concern, and she couldn't even bring herself to muster a smile as she dialled Sam's number.

"_Alex? Is everything okay?"_

"No." she said, Embry's grip tightening around her briefly in surprise. "Sam – I think Jacob is going to tonight."

"_You're sure?"_ He asked, a faint rustling in the background telling her he was on the move.

Alex watched as the red car rounded the corner and disappeared from view, moving in the direction of Forks. "Yes." She said, suddenly certain. "Yes, and Sam, he's going on a _date_ – he won't be in La Push."

"_We'll handle it. Put Embry on."_ She passed her phone to Embry wordlessly, her boyfriend stepping away to talk to his Alpha.

Jacob was going to Phase tonight; she could feel it as solidly as she could feel her heart beating a nervous thrum. He was going to Phase, and all she could hope was that he didn't hurt someone or himself.

Embry re-joined her, slipping her phone back into her pocket, and wrapping her in a tight hug. "Are you okay to drive yourself home today? I've gotta…" he jerked his head in the direction of the trees.

She smiled wanly. "I think I can handle it. Be careful."

"It's just Jake, babe." Embry grinned, and kissed her. He was happy; happy at the prospect of having his friend back, smiling against her lips. She felt like shit, but forced herself to return the gesture, breaking apart from him and catching her breath. "Alright. I'll come by later tonight, okay?"

"'Kay." She said, and stood back to watch him lop towards the trees.

When he was out of sight, she let her face crumple, pressing her fist to her chest hard enough to hurt. "Hey, are you okay?"

She turned at Quil's tentative voice. "You're speaking to me?" she blurted in surprise.

Quil looked uncomfortable. "I thought you weren't speaking to me. _No one_ is speaking to me." His eyes were sad, and she buried her own distress in favour of consoling her friend. Very soon, Jacob would be taken from him too.

"Yeah. Um, I'm really, _really_ sorry." She said.

Quil's jaw worked. "Are you gonna tell me why you and Embry are being so weird?"

Her face fell. "I can't." he scoffed, and turned to go. "Quil – I'm sorry, I want to, Embry wants to – but we _can't_."

"Is this about Sam's gang? Does he have something over you?" He looked concerned, despite his irritation.

She shook her head. "He isn't – I mean, yes, but, it's not a gang. It's not…" She trailed off frustratedly. "I'm sorry. I can't say. But I never wanted this to happen. You can trust me on that." Quil looked unsure, and she reached for him, catching his wrist. "Do you want a lift home?"

Quil shook his head. "I drove." He didn't wait for her response, ignoring her distraught look, and turning to leave her. She watched him go, feeling impossibly small.

_Great. Now Quil hated her too._

* * *

She was almost asleep when she felt it; a dynamic shift, and her head spun at the sudden flare of heat that rushed through her. Outside, a sudden howl echoed around the trees, and she sat up. The roiling in her stomach ceased just as suddenly as it had come, and she went to the window almost cautiously. The howl had been joined by others, the varying tones she thought she could almost recognise.

The night grew quieter eventually, but she stayed by her window, waiting. Embry hadn't come yet, and she wanted to know how Jacob was. Because Jacob had Phased, she was certain. The hours ticked by, and still, Embry hadn't arrived. She fell asleep there, uneasy and shallowly, forehead pillowed against the window, and woke as the sun managed to hit her window.

She stood unsteadily, body sore from her cramped position, and toddled over to her phone. The battery was dead, and she groaned in frustration. It would take too long to charge it. She wanted to know what was happening _now_. She plugged in her phone at the wall, and pulled on a change of clothes, wincing at her greasy hair. She pounded down the stairs, and was almost at the door, when her mother called her name.

"Alex! Where are you going?"

She winced. "Out."

"With Embry?" She turned as her mother stepped out of the kitchen, arms crossed. "You're spending a lot of time with him recently."

"So? Does it matter?" She said defensively.

Her mother pursed her lips. "Do we need to have the talk?"

Alex blanched. "Ew! No, mom! God." She scowled. "I'm _going_." Her mother held her position, and Alex resisted the urge to run, containing herself to a slow, casual pace down the driveway, sliding into Embry's car and backing out calmly. It was only when she was out of sight of her house that she hit the gas, and sped towards Emily's house.

It was empty.

She paused, blinking at the lack of cars in the driveway, the closed door, the lack of light from the windows.

"Where is everybody?" she muttered, and slowly backed out of the driveway. She idled by the side of the road for a moment. It didn't make sense that they weren't at Emily's – it was like a _den_ – but if Jacob- "Jacob." She said, and thrust the car into gear. Of course. Billy knew _all_ about the Pack, it made sense that he'd want his son close. She made a spinning turn, tires screeching a little. "Whoops…" she muttered, and headed towards the Black's house.

She was right; by the time she'd crested the hill outside the house, she could see Paul's truck, and Sam's car parked in front of the red painted house. She kept driving a little further, turning down the side of the house to park there – catching sight of a couple of familiar shirtless figures. She waved out the windshield to Paul and Jared, and undid her seat belt. She looked back up with a shriek, Paul's face suddenly in her window. She laughed, and opened the door. "Dude, you gave me a heart attack. Where-"

"Go home, Alex." He said seriously. She frowned.

"Um, hi. And, uh, no." She told him, and he sighed, pushing her back, into the car. "What's your problem, Paul?"

Jared was hovering in front of the vehicle, looking between them and the trees on the other side of the Black's yard. "Alex, it's not safe for you to be here right now, okay? Jacob is-"

But Alex had caught sight of another person, and her heart jumped into her throat at the sight of Embry on the porch. His arm was in a sling, and he had a raised red cut running almost the full length of his torso. "Em…" she breathed and ducked under Paul's barring arm. He made a grab for her, missing by inches, and when Jared turned, stepping in her path, she scowled. "**_Back off, Jared._**" He faltered, eyes going wide, and she took advantage of his pause to slip past him, running towards Embry. "Embry!" she called, and he turned to her, and she frowned at the way his face fell.

"Alex, what are you doing here?" he asked, moving to meet her at the bottom of the stairs.

Alex laughed a little angrily. "Why can't I be here? Jacob _just_ Phased, I want to see him. Where is he?" she peered into the house behind him but couldn't see any evidence of movement there. She looked back to Embry. "What happened, Em?" she asked him, softer this time.

Embry looked pinched. "He wasn't… in his right mind."

Alex shook her head, confused. "Who? Who did this?" anger began to build in her belly, and she reached for his face. He leant into her touch, looking a little relieved. "Em?"

He sighed. "Jacob did." Alex went still. "He didn't mean to! And he feels _really_ terrible now, but he was just…" he scrambled, watching the way she had grown quiet. "It's fine, Alex. Its just not safe."

"Bullshit." She growled and turned. "JACOB BLACK!" she roared, in the direction of the forest. Behind her, Embry flinched. "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

There was nothing for a long moment, but she _knew_ he heard her. Then, a low dangerous growl echoed from the trees. "Alex, don't." Embry whispered, but she was already striding towards the tree line, hands curling into fists at her side.

It didn't _matter_ that he had been out of control – he had still _hurt_ Embry – and from the looks of things, had clearly known what he was doing, enough so to seriously injure Embry. They weren't very far in, and she caught sight of Sam first. The huge black wolf wasn't facing her, but at her footsteps, he let out a warning snarl. She ignored him, stepping around him, and caught sight of _Jacob_.

He was big – as big as Sam already, with paws even larger, indicating he wasn't finished growing – and he was pinned beneath Sam's front paws, Sam's jaws around the scruff of his neck. As she came closer, she watched as he thrashed furiously, letting rip another bone chilling growl. Sam shivered slightly, but in the next moment, Jacob went unnaturally still. She wondered just how much control the Alpha was mentally exerting over him. He was a deep russet colour, almost amber, reminiscent of autumn, and his long white fangs were exposed, growls rolling from him as if he couldn't help it.

"Jesus." She breathed, and at her voice, he thrashed again. She scowled. "Quit it, asshole. I know you can understand me."

Jacob went wild, frenzied as he bucked, and Alex felt her gut twist with sudden fear as Sam lost his grip on the wolf, jaws snapping around nothing as Jacob twisted out from underneath him. She didn't need Sam to tell her to run, and turned, sprinting away as Jacob turned towards her. _What was wrong with him?_ It beat in her chest, fear lending her speed as she heard Sam and Jacob snarling and snapping behind her.

There was a cry from the house, Embry was already sprinting towards her, and behind her, she heard the sudden crash and thudding of huge paws. The next moment, wolf-Embry was running towards her, roaring at Jacob, who was right on her tail. But Embry wasn't quick enough, and she wasn't paying enough attention; and when her foot caught on a little hillock, she stumbled, ankle bursting with pain as she went down, rolling several paces before stopping, winded. Jacob was already on her, and she shuddered, biting her lip hard enough to bleed as she tried to keep from screaming.

His massive paws landed on either side of her body, and Embry was snarling, nearly there, Paul howling and Sam coming from the trees, all of them panicked.

And then she met Jacob's furious eyes, muzzle drawn up around his fangs, terrifyingly close.

_The world stopped._


	19. Mine: Chapter 18

The world stopped.

It felt as if time had halted, and yet, she was suddenly, somehow, more aware of herself than ever before – the way her heart beat in her chest, the shaky breath she was pulling in, the way her body was alight with _fire_. It coalesced, crested, building within her – Jacob's eyes _burning_ – and then all at once, it abated, but all over she tingled, warmed from within by a strange _something_ she could sense as well as she could sense the grass crushed beneath her hands.

And then Jacob was gone, bowled over by three furred forms that were snapping and snarling, and she lay there shaking, eyes on the grey of the sky. The sounds faded, because Jacob had stilled, frozen as she was, and shakily she raised herself up on her elbows. Sam and Paul were still standing over Jacob's body, where he was lying still, bleeding a little from one of his ears. But Embry was whining a little, and as she watched, Sam turned and snapped at him, and he went scrambling into the trees, still limping a little on his injured leg.

Hands on her shoulders made her jump and make a noise, and Jacob twitched where he was lying. "Hey! Hey, it's okay – it's just me." Jared lifted her upright, hands gentle. "Are you okay?" she gave him a hopeless look.

Alex felt the warmth inside her stoke, lifting and tugging, and almost involuntarily she looked back over at Jacob. "No." She said, honestly and his jaw tightened. Unease began to fill her, and she swallowed thickly. "Tell me that didn't just happen." She said hoarsely, to Jacob. Something was _wrong_. Something had just happened, and if it was what she thought it was, she thought she might be sick.

Jacob whined, and she scowled. "Phase back." She told him. He whimpered again, and she stepped out of Jared's lose grip towards him. "Phase back _now_, Jacob." He shuddered, and then he was shrinking and transforming. He was naked, but she couldn't have cared less, only had eyes for his twisted face. Paul turned and ran back towards the trees, appearing in the next moment human, holding a pair of shorts that he tossed in Jacob's direction. She waited for him to pull them on shakily before she spoke again. She had to be clear. "Tell me that you didn't just _Imprint_ on me." She whispered furiously.

Jacob looked to Sam, who hadn't moved, fangs still half exposed in warning. "I did-"

Alex punched him.

She yelped, her fist smarting, Jacob unmoved. "Fuck you." She told him through gritted teeth.

He bristled, the fire inside her sparking a little painfully. She recognised it for what it was, _his_ anger. "Fuck _me?_ It's not like I could have controlled it!"

"Yes, _fuck you!_" She screamed back. "You've just-" she broke off wildly, shaking her head. "It's not supposed to be _us." _She said. Jacob's face went a little tight, and Alex turned to Sam and Paul. "Can you guys give us a minute."

Paul shook his head instantly. "No."

"_Please._" She said, a little desperately. Sam made a soft noise, and then turned to leave, nudging Paul with his snout on the way past.

Paul looked hesitant. "If he- just call, and we'll be back, okay?" He gave Jacob a dangerous look that didn't seem to register.

Then, they were alone. Jacob turned his flat eyes on her. "Bella." He said simply, challengingly.

"Embry." She said in return. "It's not meant to be us." She repeated.

Jacob nodded, "We can be… friends. Sam said it could just be a friendship." It sounded as though he was trying to convince himself a little, and Alex felt another pang of anger. She wasn't sure if it was his, or if it was her own now. "I didn't want this either." He told her. They stared at each other for another long moment.

"I never wanted _any_ of this for you." She admitted quietly. "I didn't want it for Embry, and I never wanted it for you either."

Jacob scowled. "Whatever. It doesn't make a difference." She nodded silently, and he let out a frustrated breath, and turned away from her, towards the house.

She let him go, determinedly ignoring the way the fire leapt in protest, the way the thing holding them together protested, like a rubber band being stretched. She ignored it, and she tramped it down, and as the door slammed behind him, it fell back.

She still felt sick.

She sat down hard on the grass, jarring herself a little with the impact, and dug her fingers into the soft dirt, clinging.

_It shouldn't have been them. It shouldn't have happened at all._

It was a _curse_. It took away their free-will, it tried to force them together. It was tugging at her, even now, and she gagged at the sensation, clenching her teeth and willing her sick away.

"Alex…"

It was Embry, looking miserable. She stood unsteadily, but he didn't move, eyes downcast. "Listen, I understand. We can still be friends, and I don't-" Alex closed the difference between them and kissed him – hard. He made a surprised sound, and then broke apart from her. "What are you doing?"

"Not letting you breakup with me." She said, irrationally angry. "Embry, I'm not going to let some creepy ancient magic ruin this. I like you, and I hope, you like me."

"Alex, it's not that simple-" he tried, and she kissed him again. He let her, hands fluttering on her sides before he tucked them behind his back.

"Why can't it be that simple?" She asked, panting a little. "Jacob doesn't like me, and I don't like him. He's into _Bella_. We both know he's too stubborn to let that go." She looked up at him, at the tense lines of his face. Something uncomfortable stirred within her, and she ignored it. "Embry…"

Embry's mouth twisted unhappily. "I'm into you too, Alex." He sighed, "But I can't promise anything. I don't know."

"Why?" Alex asked.

Embry's jaw worked. "You don't understand; when Jacob Imprinted, I – my wolf I mean – he wanted to turn tail and run. I – _he – _still does."

"You're not your wolf, Em…" Alex said, and he gave her a hard look.

"You can't understand, Alex, don't pretend you do." His voice was sharp, and she took a small step back. "Sorry…" he said lowly.

_He was right; there were things she would never understand – but she was right too. She wasn't going to throw her life away over an Imprint._

They were silent, at a standoff, but Alex refused to back away. Eventually Embry sighed. "We…we can try."

Alex let out a breath she hadn't known she was holding. "Okay. That's- that's all I want."

They stood there in a sudden awkwardness that frightened her. _Fuck. This was all kinds of wrong._ She was angry again, could feel Jacob's own answering rage. They were both so angry – Alex hadn't felt like this before – wasn't sure how to fix it. "Will you take me home?" she asked quietly. Embry looked to the house, obviously seeking permission, and it only served to make her more angry, the fire licking its way up her ribcage, threatening to spill out of her mouth. She clenched her jaw tightly shut, stomping down on the sparks.

"Yeah." He said, clearly receiving a confirmation. She tried to take his hand as they headed towards her car, but she missed it, and wasn't sure if he had deliberately pulled away to scratch at his nose or if it had been an accident. Either way, it only made her feel worse.

The house was empty when they got home, and Embry lingered in the doorway until she managed to snag his wrist and pulled him in. The scratch on his torso was already faded to a white line, and when they reached the kitchen he gingerly took off the sling. "You hungry?" she asked him.

"I could eat." He said a little cautiously. She sighed, and headed for the fridge, pulling out the whole carton of eggs, and the unopened packet of bacon. She couldn't cook, but putting things in a pan and making sure they didn't burn was well within the scope of her ability.

It was only when they were eating – or at least, Embry was, shovelling eggs into his mouth with single-minded determination – did she break the uncomfortable silence. "We can't just tip-toe around this." She said, setting down the strip of crispy bacon she'd been chewing on.

Embry looked up, a little wide-eyed. "Alex-"

"You said we'd _try,_ Em." She said, trying not to sound as though she was whining, which, she totally was, but wasn't willing to admit. Embry's jaw tightened and she watched a tremor run through him. She sat back, feeling guilty. For all his unusual composure, he was still a young wolf. _Pushing him wouldn't help anything._ "I'm sorry."

He didn't respond, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. A roll of nausea made her push back her chair and stand up. She wasn't hungry anymore. She washed her dishes in the silence that had settled over the room. It was quiet enough that she could hear him stand, despite his quiet grace, and she wasn't startled when his arms came around her. "I've got to go." He mumbled, squeezing her tight for a moment before letting go.

She didn't hear him leave, but felt the faint breeze that cooled her skin from her front door opening and closing, and bowed her head, staring unseeingly into the sudsy water. It was only the disturbance on the surface of the water that told her she was crying; tear drops splattering into the cooling water.

_Everything was falling apart._


	20. Mine: Chapter 19

Jacob could feel her.

A fire in his chest; flickering and hot enough to scald him if he thought about it too hard. He was trying not to. One would think – with his recent transformation, the sudden weight of the tribe's secrets and his status as the technical Alpha – he had enough to worry about, had enough to keep himself occupied.

But no.

No, it was Alex's stupid face he kept thinking about, Alex's stupid voice that was making the tremors keep running down his spine, _Alex_ keeping him so unstable.

He didn't want to be Alpha, and he didn't want her.

Unfortunately, both things were proving harder to deny than he thought they would be.

"Son, do you understand what you're giving up?"

Jacob blinked, trying to rip himself out of the angry train of thought he had been spiralling into. His dad was giving him a hard look, Sam hovering a little over his shoulder, perpetual frown in place. Jacob wasn't sure how he felt about Sam yet; sure, he had been wrong about the man, but months of distrust couldn't just be shaken off like nothing had happened. Besides, it turned out they had all been _waiting_ for him to Phase. Surely they could have _told_ him – they'd told Alex-

He clenched his jaw, and as the fire in his chest flared along with his irritation he stood. "Yes I'm sure." He bit out, looking at Sam now. "I don't want it."

Sam's eyes were serious. "It's your birthright. You have to be sure." He said, and Jacob rolled his eyes.

"I'm _sure._" He said, just edging onto a growl.

Sam unfolded his arms. "Not just you, Jacob – _He_ has to agree too. You both need to be sure." For a moment, Jacob was confused, the slight shift in Sam's dark eyes pulling something in him – and then _He_ stirred. His wolf.

_We are Alpha._

Jacob could feel him too. He wasn't entirely how separate they were; because it wasn't as if they were two different entities, but Jacob was aware of him, his impulses Jacob's impulses, and vice-versa. He was always close to the surface, unsettled.

But Jacob didn't want to be Alpha. He didn't want the responsibility, the power, _any of it._

_We are Alpha._

No.

_We are-_

NO.

It was an odd sense of displacement, and he was dimly aware that he was trembling again, struggling against the thing inside him, the baser animal that was determined to realise _his birthright-_

Jacob swallowed, and leant forwards, flattening his palms on the table – and as his wolf slunk back into the quiet recesses of his mind, cowed – he met Sam's eyes. "I don't want it." He said slowly and deliberately, and this time he was sure.

Sam nodded once. "Okay." He didn't say thank you, and Jacob wasn't sure that he should, or if he would have accepted it anyway.

Jacob wasn't really sure about anything – except the constant anger threatening to engulf him.

* * *

This he liked.

The way the earth felt under his paws, the speed in which he could run, so fast it almost felt like flight, the new facets of life he could sense; the birds in the trees, the deer in the bracken, the butterflies taking flight from the flowers – everything.

So far, running seemed to be the only thing that could keep the negative thoughts far away.

**_Jake._**

Embry had just Phased in and was in his mind. That was going to take some getting used to. Privacy was a thing of the past now.

**_Sorry, man._**

Jacob couldn't help the odd flush of anger; because right then, _she _was far too close in both of their thoughts. Embry'd just left her, he could still see the edges of her kitchen in his most recent memories, the smell of the eggs he'd eaten, the sound of her crying Embry had caught on the way to the forest.

**_I'm sorry._**

Embry apologized again. Jacob didn't want him to be sorry. Jacob couldn't care less.

**_Still, dude. And it's not just because-_**

Jacob snarled, swiping out at a tree as he ran, gouging deep chunks out of its trunk. A part of him was instantly sorry for the damage, and he caught a brief sheepish thought from Embry; because he too, had caused his fair share of damage to plant life in the forest, but that wasn't the point.

**_It's also for school. For the shit week. I really wanted to tell you._**

_But you couldn't._ Jacob knew Embry had been placed under a gag order. Sam had told him. Jacob had also felt the momentary weight of the Alpha's power. He didn't really remember much about the first couple of moments of his Phasing, and the hours that had followed he had been so angry it was as if he couldn't control himself.

_You don't have to apologise, man. I should be the one apologizing. _Jacob still remembered the rip and tear that he had made in Embry's flesh, the easy give of his bone beneath his jaws. All because of _her-_

**_You can't blame her, Jake-_**

_Yes, I can._

Embry went quiet for a moment, the steady stream of his consciousness fading enough that Jacob had a hard time sensing it. He envied his friend. It was clear Embry was controlled in a way he would never be. He'd heard Paul's own jealousy of the fact, Sam's pride in their second youngest member's focus.

Jacob felt like he was coming apart at the seams.

_I miss Bella._

The thought hit him out of the blue, and with it came a huge swell of guilt. _God, Bells'd be freaking out now. _He just wanted her with him, wanted to see her awkward little smile, hold her soft little hand, hear her call his name-

**_We're not supposed to tell people, but like, she ran with the leeches right? I'm sure you could tell her._**

_Sam said no one can know._ Jacob was back to angry. It looked as though anger was to be his default setting now.

Embry was confused, Jacob could feel it, just as he could sense his friend converging on his path, getting closer as he skimmed the cliffs. The forest was thinning around him, the closer he got to the coastline, the sparser the trees.

**_Jacob, you're Alpha – you can do what you want._**

_I gave it to Sam._ He wasn't sure if that was the best way to phrase it, as if the burden was a parcel to be handed off – but it seemed to fit. The moment he had beaten his wolf into agreement, it was as if a weight had lifted from his shoulders.

**_You what!?_**

Embry was close enough now that Jacob heard his confused bark from his right, and he slowed his pace as his friend appeared from the trees. Embry was smaller than him again; Jacob remembered his confusion upon seeing Embry at school, taller and broader than he could have ever imagined. Now though, Embry was a near half foot shorter at the shoulder, even with his fur ruffled and standing on end in the stiff ocean breeze. Embry was happy, though, happy to see him, happy to have him – and despite all the _shit_, Jacob brushed his muzzle against his friend's affectionately.

_It wasn't right. I didn't want it. Sam'll do a better job than I will. _Embry was torn between two loyalties for moment, before Jacob nudged at him again, toppling him over playfully. _Besides, I have too much homework to think about organizing your ass._

Embry groaned, flashing quickly through the multitudes of homework waiting on his unused desk at home. Jacob flopped atop his friend's pale underbelly, trying not to look at the slightly bald stripe across the wound that he had given his friend. Embry wiggled for a moment underneath him, giving up with a whine.

**_It's fine, dude. I get it._**

Jacob growled. _I don't. You never attacked anyone, did you?_ Embry's mind went to his Phasing, and Jacob had to hold himself still as Alex's frightened face came through both of their minds, all too similar to the terrified expression she had had underneath him this morning. They both turned uncomfortably from the image, for different reasons.

**_She's your Imprint, makes sense you'd be territorial._** Embry was clearly not finished with the line of conversation he'd rather they stop. **_Sorry, man, but we do need to talk about it._**

_She wants you, I don't want her. It's simple. _

Even as he said it, he could feel Embry's extreme discomfort, the echoes of the wrongness his friend had felt in the time he had spent with Alex immediately after, could sense Embry's wolf's inherent panic upon infringing upon an Imprint-

Jacob growled, and Embry's thoughts quietened.

**_You've messed up the ranking._**

Jacob rolled off Embry at the strange thought, his abrupt change of subject. _What do you mean?_ Embry's dark eyes weren't overtly serious, so some of his building worry eased. Embry's tongue lolled out.

**_You've jumped me. Newest member should be at the bottom of the ranking._** **_Can't you feel it?_**

Jacob could feel it. It was instinctive and unexplainable; the rank of the pack. Sam's power holding them all together; Jared his Second, Paul his Third – and where Embry should had outranked him, Jacob was beneath them. He could remember, just vaguely, the heady way he had fought against the hold Sam had him in, all of Sam's power trying to hold him down – the way he had felt it snap almost viscerally when he had broken the command, the way a weight had lifted when he had given _it_ back to Sam.

**_Weird, right?_**

Embry stood, shaking out his fur. **_Anyway, I'm just glad you're… here._**

Jacob's own heart ached for his friend at the sudden influx of old confusion and loneliness that came through Embry. Embry had the Pack, sure, but Sam, Paul and Jared were their own friends, and despite the brotherhood they shared, Jacob could feel how much Embry had _missed_ him, _missed_ Quil.

_Quil._

Their minds both went to their friend, and Jacob couldn't help but whine a little. Quil would be left in the dark as much as he had been, but this time – he didn't have anyone. _Maybe he'd Phase too…_ Jacob wasn't sure whether to hope for it or not. Embry didn't seem sure either; for a moment, a snatch of a conversation played out in his friend's mind.

**_"We can finally stop hiding this. You guys can make up."_**

**_"It is the last thing I want, Embry… It's stolen your future and your life."_**

Jacob felt a surge in the heat in his chest. _We should head back._ He didn't want to address what he had just heard, didn't want to put a name to the emotion building in his gut as he pictured Bella's confused face as he left her at the cinemas.

* * *

_Quil_.

Alex sat up from her despondent sprawl across her bed. It was late on Sunday, and she hadn't heard anything from _anyone_. Even Paul wasn't picking up – and though she wanted to talk to Embry, see Emily, hell, even go hang out with her sister – all things would involve potentially seeing the one person she didn't want to see. So, she had been sulking all day; stewing in equal parts self-loathing and self-pity, a truly confusing and depressing mix of emotions. She wasn't sure why the thought of her friend had taken so long to occur to her. With Embry and Jacob with the Pack now, Quil would be isolated with no idea why.

_God, and she had ruined the only good time he would have had with his best friends too. _Alex was well and truly _the worst_.

But she wasn't going to let him be alone.

She scrabbled for her phone and dialled his number.

"_Oh hi, asshole._" Quil greeted her bluntly, and she winced. "_Wanna tell me why **none** of you have been answering my texts?"_

"Sorry, Quil. I've been… busy. Don't know about the others though." She lied weakly. "They haven't been answering me either." That at least, was true.

Quil snorted, and she could practically _see_ his eyeroll. "_Whatever_." He hung up, and she gasped, redialling him immediately. "_What?"_ he grunted, with even less emotion than his first greeting.

"I swear they're not responding, dude! Come on, I'm sorry. Let me buy you pizza or something." Alex apologized frantically. Quil was silent. "Quil, I know I've really, _really_ sucked recently – and I know we've _all_ been flaky, but trust me when I say I never meant to hurt your feelings, and I really just need someone to hang out with right now. I miss you, man."

There was a long buzzing silence over the line, before finally, he sighed. "_Bring ice-cream too, and if it's not an extra-large, I'm not letting you in."_

Alex sagged a little with relief. "I'll see you soon. With an extra large pizza and ice-cream." She stood, beelining towards her sneakers, toeing them on.

Quil huffed. "_And Alex?"_

"Yeah?" She waited, stilled in her doorway.

"_I missed you too. Even though you're an asshole._"

* * *

She had to kick Quil's front door in lieu of a knock, balancing the large pizza box in one hand and the family sized carton of Neapolitan ice-cream in the other. One of her palms was burning, the other freezing, but it was trivial. If it meant Quil's forgiveness, then so be it. It was silent, and Quil's parents' car wasn't in the driveway, the windows dark, and for a moment she wondered if she'd just been pranked.

Then the door creaked open, and Quil was revealed in the small crack he'd allowed. She gave him her best smile, and displayed her goods. "I come bringing offerings of contrition." He sniffed, and opened the door, leaving her to kick it shut as he shuffled back down the hallway. He was wrapped in his couch's throw blanket like a little old lady, and though she was in the dog-house, she very nearly laughed at the sight he made. She followed him into the lounge, which like the rest of the house, was in darkness, but for the light from the television screen. Quil folded himself back into the nest he had obviously made for himself, and she took in the dirty dishes in front of him, and the movie playing on the screen. It was Ten Things I Hate About You, and Alex sighed. "Oh, Quil have you been moping all weekend?"

Quil made an indignant noise. "_Just_ because I haven't moved, and I'm watching Heath Ledger, does not mean I was _moping_." He narrowed his eyes at her. "How dare you come in here and abuse me further."

"Sorry, sorry!" She said quickly, and placed the pizza box in his lap. He opened it immediately, and pressed play on the remote whilst shoving a slice into his mouth with his other hand. She left him to put the ice-cream in the freezer. When she got back, he'd cleared a little space for her on the couch. _Baby steps. _She'd take what she got. Alex sat, drawing her knees up to her chest as Heath Ledger nailed Julia Stiles with a paintball. "I really am sorry, Quil."

He took another huge bite of his second slice before tilting the box to her. She took a slice. "I know you are." He sighed. "Still sucks though."

She chewed a little guiltily. "I broke my promise." She said, swallowing the cheesy mouthful. Quil shrugged. They finished their slices in silence, and when the two characters on screen began to kiss, she felt a pang of longing. "Um. I think me and Embry broke up." She said. As she said it, she knew it was true. As she said it, she knew that pang of longing was for the relationship she had had, _not_ him – which in turn just made her angry. This creepy, stupid _thing_ was already messing with her.

Quil did a double take, turning to look at her with his mouth wide open, displaying his mashed up food and surprise. "Oh shit! Are you okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah, man." Then, to her surprise and embarrassment, she started to cry again. Quil floundered, placing the pizza down and awkwardly shifting over to wrap her in an uncomfortable one armed hug, patting her head with greasy fingers. "Sorry." She sniffled. "I shouldn't be the one upset."

Quil coughed. "It's, um, cool. Let it out I guess." His mouth twisted unhappily. "Shit. That really sucks." She rubbed at her eyes furiously. She couldn't even tell him why she was really crying; a loss of freedom due to an ancient magic was harder to explain than a breakup. Whatever Embry and her could have had was gone before it had properly taken root, and she couldn't even feel properly sad because of the _Imprint_ – which was trying to ease her sadness, which was burning for a different boy, the _wrong _boy. "Do you need me to beat him up?" The sudden déjà vu made her laugh wetly.

"Nah." She sniffled, and sat back a little, and Quil took the hint, easing away and picking up the pizza again; handing her another slice before she even asked for it. "Thanks. Sorry for crying. I'm supposed to be grovelling for your forgiveness."

Quil smiled slightly. "If you watch the rest of the movie with me, consider yourself forgiven." It was a small price; Alex may have preferred to watch The Fast and The Furious, but she was hardly as opposed to Quil's secret chick-flick addiction as the other two.

"Of course, Quil." She told him, wiping at her eyes one last time, forcing her tears away. It was selfish to be crying. She was glad, suddenly, irrationally, for the anger that came so easily when she thought about _him_ – it made it easier to stop crying, to forget about her self-pity in favour of focussing on the fury that was lighting her chest in constant fire.


	21. Mine: Chapter 20

Alex got a text from Emily on Tuesday, telling her she was missed, and was welcome around the house whenever she felt ready.

_Whenever she felt ready._

She deleted it without replying.

Quil looked up from his surfboard, pausing in his dutiful stokes of the wax bar to give her a hopeful smile. It fell when she shook her head. "Still nothing." _That_ at least was true. It had been radio silence from Embry, and though she hadn't messaged Jacob, Quil hadn't received any response from him either, though that was probably due to the whole wolf-thing, rather than any personal vendetta. She managed a smile. "Still wanna go to the beach?"

He shrugged. "Yeah – but I doubt they'll be any decent surf."

They'd been attached at the hip for the last couple of days, Alex determined not only to be there for her friend, but to ignore the way her chest was aching, Quil determined to pretend everything was fine.

"Why're you waxing up then?" She asked, trying to keep the mood light, reaching for another cookie.

Quil raised his nose in the air slightly. "Keeping a board in good condition requires constant upkeep." He said haughtily. She rolled her eyes at him, and threw a cookie at him. Without looking, he snatched it out of the air. She paused, looking at him, as he eyed the cookie he had caught with wide eyes. "Did you see that? I guess I'm a superhero now." He laughed to himself, eating the snack.

She frowned, giving him a proper once over. Quil had always been bulky, but a little short. Was he- was he _taller?_ She squinted at him, trying to see if he'd put on the inches she must have been oblivious too. He met her gaze. "What, weirdo?" he asked her, raising an eyebrow. "Is there something on my face."

"Stand up." She ordered, and he did so, smiling a little bemusedly. A few moments ago, she wouldn't have noticed anything wrong. A few days ago, she was the same height as him. Today – _oh god this was really happening –_ he was a good half a foot taller than her. "Oh fuck." She swore. No, her eyes were not playing tricks on her, he had really grown that much in the past 48-hours.

"What, Alex?" Quil was starting to look concerned, so she smiled. She shouldn't worry, she tried to reassure herself, it didn't seem to be as drastic as Embry or Jacob's growth spurts. Maybe it _was_ normal for boys to grow that much in such a short space of time.

"Nothing." She told him. "Just realised you're getting a little taller is all."

He blinked, taking the new distance between them. He grinned proudly. "Ah, yes. Just, y'know, hitting my strides as a man."

She laughed. "Idiot." She slugged him fondly, bending to pick up the rest of the cookies. "Shall we head to the beach now?"

"Yeah." Quil slung an arm around her as they ambled down the main road, and though it made walking a little harder under the awkward hold, she didn't shrug him off, happy to be with him. _Happy. She was happy._

Or so she told herself.

* * *

**_LEECH._**

He couldn't be sure which of them had thought it, which of them had smelt the trail, had sensed the intruder – but the sudden outcry through the pack mind had been instinctual and completely synced.

Jacob was already Phased, wandering near his house, trying to get over the anger stopping him from returning inside. He'd woken up angry, and had broken two pans trying to make breakfast and when his dad had mentioned something about Bella calling, he'd nearly broken the door trying to get outside before he exploded in the house.

It was stupid, really. How on edge he felt, how frayed his emotions were. Everything was a trigger, and he didn't know his own strength. Embry had Phased in earlier too, and had been trying to make him feel better, but of course, Jacob knew that Embry's main problem was keeping his mother from grounding him, rather than any petty self-control problems, which had just made it harder for him to focus.

Honestly, he was almost _glad_ for the sudden interruption, the sudden wash of panic and animal instinct to _protect, attack- _Jacob ran hard, Embry at his side, keeping pace easily. His friend was fast, faster than the others. _He was faster though – and his wolf was baying for blood._

Paul was furious, angry that it had gotten so close, too close. Jared and Sam were much the same. Jacob fell in behind Paul's grey flank, the older wolf replaying the last few moments before he'd gotten the alert, before he had smelt the _stinking thing, Kitty far too close, too close, too close-_

**_Enough._** Sam was tramping down his own anger, exercising a sizeable amount of calming influence over them all. Jacob was surprised to feel his own tumultuous emotions smooth in places. He hadn't realised how worked up he was. **_Be angry later. Focus now._**

Jared's internal train of thought, which was also revolving around _Kim, Kim, Kim, Kim, Kim-_ quieted as well, and it was only then that Jacob began to understand where they were headed – Jared had been the one to cross the unknown leech's trail whilst on the way to his father's house. East, it had been going East-

That would lead to Forks. That would lead to Bella.

Jacob snarled, muscles bunching powerfully as he drew ahead of the others. Sam's distant warning fading, ignoring his Alpha's call to **_CALM DOWN-_**

* * *

Alex gasped at the unexpected surge of panic and rage that flared in her, sudden and surprising and _not her own._

"Jacob." She bit out, pressing a hand to her throat, trying to supress her answering anxiety, breathing hitching sharply. Quil turned around, concerned.

"Alex? What's-"

Whatever he was about to ask evaded her, as her eyes fluttered shut, gravity pulling her limp body to hit the sand.

* * *

_Jacob was outpacing the others without heed, nose angled to the east, teeth bared in a ferocious snarl. For the first time, Alex was entirely aware of her Walk – completely aware of the consciousness she had invaded. She was aware of the snap into place, the ease with which she could sense Jacob's turmoil. _

_This time, it was easy to call for the wolf._

_JACOB._

_His violent surprise almost sent her sliding. He could sense her presence now too, and it caused him to falter, losing his footing and crashing head over heels in a hidden divot in the earth. The way the horizon and sky went spinning made them both feel a little nauseous – but he recovered quickly. _

Alex? What the fuck-

_What's going on, Jacob?_

_There wasn't time to argue, because even as they faced off in their own anger, Alex could sense, through Jacob, the voices of the Pack, Sam's loudest of all – and she could feel the Alpha's pull, Jacob somehow ignoring them all._

A Leech.

_She could sense his unease at her presence, but the animalistic pull towards the monster that they were chasing was already beginning to overwhelm him again. Alex almost didn't recognize the tumultuous thoughts of the boy she was with. He was baying for blood, some deeper tone calling to unleash violence. _

_You need to listen to Sam._

_Jacob snapped and snarled, head whipping around, searching for an enemy to loose his irritation at her statement upon. His fangs closed on air. _

You have no right to tell me what to do. I don't even know how you-

_Alex slid._

* * *

_Sam._

_The Alpha was surprised at her sudden appearance, ripples of it spreading to the others, the whisperings of her name through the Pack link. _

_Jacob's out of control._

**_I know. He's angry. Unbalanced. Bella's in Forks._**

_Sam was short, terse. His attention was too divided, focussed on keeping the others in formation, his own head clear, running as fast as he could, trying to keep Jacob in check. Alex felt helpless, staring through Sam's eyes as he did a quick sweep of the others, the forest rushing past them at dizzying rates. They were on the hunt, and perhaps it was because she had never seen them like this – in the light of predators, dangerous creatures – but Alex, for the first time, felt a thrill of fear. _

_Her mind went to Billy's explanation of Dream Walkers, what felt like years ago. _

_"They could see what they see, move as they move… if one was strong enough, theoretically – a Dream Walker could enter a person's consciousness and control them…"_

_Jacob was far ahead of them now, and Alex realised she was afraid for him as well. He was inexperienced, young, and hadn't faced a vampire before. If he got carried away, went in alone-_

* * *

He could feel her the second she re-entered his consciousness, or however the fuck she was in _his fucking head-_

_I'm sorry, Jacob, I promise I'll explain._

Honestly, he couldn't care less – right then, all that mattered was killing that _thing_ that was on his lands. Kill it. Protect the Pack. Protect Bella. Kill it. Protect the Pack. Protect Bella. Kill it. Protect the Pack. Protect Bella. _Kill it. Protect the Pack. Protect Bella-_

And then his body was no longer his own.

The only way he could think to explain it later, was as if he had been driving, and then had suddenly found himself in the backseat as someone else took the wheel. It was a sickening, disorientating experience, and the man in him immediately wanted to rage, to take back control. The wolf in him was far too calm, and the realisation that because it was _her – _because of the unnatural Imprint – made him Phase back so suddenly that his naked body went crashing into a tree as his momentum kept him flying forwards. The Pack engulfed him a moment later, only Embry lingering for a moment as Sam powered forward, giving him a furious growl as he passed.

Jacob panted, disorientated, in the remnants of the tree trunk, shivering. The cold air was sobering, and he sat up slowly, trying to regain his bearings.

Of three things, he was certain.

One; his wolf's hold upon him was stronger than he thought – and perhaps, stronger than Sam's hold.

Second; he needed to tell Bella, get her under his protection.

Thirdly; he and Alex needed to have a _talk._

With a shudder, he Phased, and started after the Pack. They were getting close, and he wasn't planning to miss out on the action.

* * *

The sharp pain that snapped her head to the side roused her with a start, and she sat up so suddenly that Quil screamed, and collapsed backwards from where he had been crouched over her. There was sand down her neck and in her hair, and the back of her head was aching a little, but clear and pressing was the scene she had just left.

She scrambled to her feet, ignoring Quil's squawks for an explanation, wheeling to face the mass of trees behind them. There was no way to tell where they had been exactly, Alex had been more focussed on their minds rather than identifying the rapidly moving surroundings. They could have been _anywhere_.

Forks. They had been heading towards Forks.

As if on cue, howls rose in the air, further from the La Push forest than she'd heard them before. She shivered, hoping they were cries of victory rather than defeat.

"Alexandra! What the fuck is going on?" Quil stepped back into her line of vision. "Are you okay? Did you hit your head? I'm sorry I slapped you, I just-"

"Quil! Calm down! It's okay." Alex grabbed him by the bicep, shaking him a little. "I'm okay. Sorry for, like, fainting or whatever."

Quil sucked in a deep breath. "That is the _second_ time you've fainted in front of me. Do you have a condition or something?"

Alex ground her teeth. The first time she'd collapsed on Quil had been entirely out of exhaustion. This time – well, she had no real explanation – she'd never Walked like that. She thought back to the intense surge of Jacob's emotions right before she had fallen. _It must have been something to do with the Imprint._ She scowled. "Or something." She muttered.

Quil shook his head. "You worry me, dude."

"I'm sorry, Quil." She told him, trying to smile. Her eyes wandered again; searching the trees. "I'm sorry…"


	22. Mine: Chapter 21

"Hey, Em. Is- is Jacob there?"

Alex winced, hoping she didn't sound as pathetic as she thought. She wanted information, wanted to grill Sam about what had happened, and although she knew she owed Jacob an explanation, she was still reluctant to see him. At Emily's knowing hum, it was obvious she had failed nonchalance. "Wow, good to hear from you, Alex." Emily sounded more disapproving than Alex had ever heard her, and she winced again.

"Sorry. I should have… called." Alex apologized lamely, taking a heavy seat on her couch. She ran her hand over her face tiredly. "I've just been…processing, I guess."

"And?" Emily prompted unashamedly. Alex sighed, and Emily sighed too. "Alex, Imprinting is a serious thing – it transcends all the-"

"Look, Emily, no offense, but I _really_ don't want to hear it." Alex interrupted, scowling. "It's not- I mean, it _can't_-" she snapped her mouth shut. "I just don't want to talk about it, and I'm willing to bet he doesn't either."

"Okay." Emily sounded a little tired. "And, no, he's not here. They're all running double patrols since Saturday." At that, her voice gave the faintest tremor of fear, and Alex's chest panged at the thought of Emily all alone in her house.

"I'm coming over." Alex said firmly.

"What? No, honey it's okay, it's late – I don't like the idea of you running around at night." Emily said worriedly, and Alex could just picture her pinched, concerned face. Guilt settled heavily on her shoulders. Emily had been there for her so many times now, and Alex hadn't been repaying her kindness the way she should have been.

"I'll see you soon." She told Emily and ended the call as Emily began to protest again. She knew Emily wouldn't have said anything to Sam about being frightened, wouldn't have admitted it to _anyone_ – it was just the woman's nature to avoid troubling others with her own whims, entirely selfless. But Alex was a bulldozer, and had no qualms about forcibly settling Emily's nerves, whether the other woman wanted it or not.

She pulled on her tracksuits over her running shorts, and hastily shoved her toothbrush into her backpack, before heading determinedly for Kitty's room, and knocking sharply on her sister's white-painted door. She didn't wait for Kitty's response, opening the door wide, and making her elder sister jump with a squeak from where she'd been bent over her guitar.

"_Alex!_ You gave me a heart attack." Kitty admonished, but couldn't seem to hide her small smile of delight as Alex wavered uncertainly at her bedroom's threshold. Alex had been distancing herself from Kitty too – avoiding Jacob and Embry meant avoiding the whole pack, which included her sister – and she realised this was probably the first time she'd spoken to her sister in almost a week.

"Sorry." She grunted, hoping her sister would realise she was apologizing for the radio silence too. At Kitty's growing grin, she knew she had. "Um. Will you drive me to Emily's? And, buy some chocolate too? I don't have any pocket money."

Kitty looked surprised. "Why? What's wrong with Em?" She stood, reaching for her own phone, clearly intent on calling her friend, but Alex stopped her.

"She'll be fine, I think. She needs some company. Maybe we should ask Kim to come too… I'm not good at…" Alex swallowed uncomfortably. "_Sleepover_ things."

Kitty trilled excitedly, making Alex wince. "Aww, you are just the _cutest_, Alex! Of course, I will, just let me call Kim, okay? I'll meet you in the car." With that, Alex found herself hustled out of the room as Kitty began dancing around, collecting various magazines and tubes of what looked like lipsticks, and several bottles of nail polish.

_What had she gotten herself into?_

* * *

Emily had been so surprised to see them all; wrapped in her pink fuzzy bathrobe, bunny slippers on, and her hair piled on her head secured with a scrunchy. It was the most off guard Alex had ever seen her, though as Kim and Kitty had squealed and pulled out matching animal slippers – Kim's little puppies, Kitty's penguin shaped – she figured this was just one more side of Emily she hadn't seen before.

It was only after the second movie had been put on, Kim carefully applying a face mask to her sister as Alex was pretending to peruse nail polish colours on the couch, did Emily approach her privately.

"Thank you, Alex." Alex looked up as Emily took a seat next to her, smiling at her with a warmth that made her stomach flip. "I-I needed this…" Emily admitted quietly, looking at the others fondly as they began to argue about Kim accidentally putting the mask up Kitty's nostrils – _"you moved!" "Because you poked me!" – _and picking up a bottle of light purple to hand to Alex.

Alex took it, ducking her head. "It's alright." She said gruffly. "I know I've made things… shitty."

Emily hummed, taking the nail polish back, and shaking it. She gestured for Alex to extend her hand, and Alex obeyed, stretching her fingers out over Emily's knee. As Emily unscrewed the cap, she cleared her throat. "I can't pretend to understand exactly what you're feeling, Alex, but when Sam Imprinted on me – he was dating someone else." Alex's eyes widened, and she resisted the urge to gawk like an idiot. What Emily and Sam had was so _pure_, so _strong_, it beggared belief that it had begun in chaos. Emily sighed. "Yep. To make things worse, he was dating my cousin. Leah and I had been close like sisters, but Sam…"

Alex frowned. "That… sucks."

"Tell me about it." Emily laughed humourlessly. "Leah still won't- I mean I understand, because she can never know why, but it _hurts_ to have her hate me." Emily's hands were deft as she worked, despite the unhappy twist her beautiful face had taken on. "And I _tried_, I really tried. I pushed him away, time and time again. Because I hated myself too – for even having feelings for him. It took… _this,_" She paused to briefly gesture at her face, and though there was old emotional hurt in her face, there was no self-consciousness. Alex was glad for that at least. "For me to see that he was a good person, ironically. He was by my side every hour of every day, and the rest is history." She smiled slightly, looking a little furtive. "I won't ever tell him, and you can't either, but I'm glad it happened. I don't know – like karma or something, for disrupting so much happiness for so long. Three people hurt so badly…" she trailed off as she resealed the bottle, and when she set it down, Alex threw her arms around her, disregarding the wet polish on her nails. Emily made a surprised noise.

Alex embraced her fiercely, hiding her expression in Emily's shoulder. When she pulled away, Emily was blinking suspiciously shiny eyes, and Kitty and Kim were looking at them in confusion. Alex cleared her throat. "Thanks… for the nail polish." She said.

Emily nodded. "Of course, honey. I'm just- I'm just going to get you a robe… I don't want you to be left out!" she threw to the room at large, with a large smile, bustling off in the next moment. Kim and Kitty watched her go a little suspiciously, and Alex drew their attention.

"Um, can I try the face mask?" she asked, making Kim turn and grin.

"Of course! It's _so_ good for your skin…" Kim went off on a tangent on the benefits of the varying ingredients, which Alex tuned out in favour of watching her sister, who was still worrying at her bottom lip, staring after Emily.

"Will you…" Alex cast around desperately for another 'sleepover-activity' to divert her sister. "Braid my hair?" she settled on, and Kitty nodded with a smile.

"It's so nice to have you here, Alex." Kitty told her, as she settled behind her.

Kim perked up from her position over Alex, nearly dropping a glob of facemask onto the carpet. "Yeah! We'll have to get you a pair of slippers! What animal do you want? Oh wait! Don't speak you'll get mask in your mouth." Alex resisted the urge to laugh, as Kitty began to gently comb through her hair.

Her sister hummed. "Your hair is a little short, Alex… They won't be very good." Alex gave a half-hearted shrug. "Well, hopefully they withstand the night." With that, her sister stifled a yawn as Emily entered the room clutching a large, dark grey version of the fluffy bathrobe she was still wearing.

"You can borrow Sam's." She told Alex, placing the robe in her lap, and picking up a bottle of blue polish to begin on herself. Alex couldn't help but laugh then, picturing Sam with a facemask on, reclining in his living room, wrapped in his robe. The sudden taste of mask, and Kim's indignant squeals made her recoil, spitting her mouthful right back into the bowl Kim was clutching, making Emily and Kitty burst into laughter.

Alex didn't really care about the discomfort then; the way Emily and her sister were laughing more than enough to ease the worry she had been feeling.

Maybe Emily was right; she _did _need to talk to Jacob, if just to explain herself, and reaffirm the boundaries of their relationship. It wasn't good for anyone for them to be fighting the way they were.

She missed him; missed her best friend.

* * *

They were exhausted, but the day's work wasn't over.

Sam had been clear that the quick break they would be taking was to be both _quick_, and a _break_ – not a rest – they needed to stay alert.

Jacob felt anything but alert as they ran for home. He could barely keep his attention on Paul's grey behind as they ran single file through the dense trees. They'd gone almost to Seattle the last night, he and Jared, partnered as they were every second night. Jacob knew that his deliberate shifting between Sam and Jared on patrol was because his Alpha was still angry about Saturday. He was keeping a close eye on Jacob, and it rankled.

_So, he'd slipped up once, so what? Paul probably-_

Paul's growl filtered through the wind back to him, and Jacob took the sharp rebuke through the link without falter. _Truth hurts, Lahote._

**_Shut up, pup, or I'll show you what really hurts._**

Jacob was almost incensed enough to push himself harder, to run just close enough so that he could nip at Paul's big, ugly ass and-

**_Enough. Both of you. We're nearly home._**

Nearly home for Sam, at least. Jacob couldn't call the pack's clubhouse home just yet. No – it was still too unfamiliar, and he could still smell Alex there – though perhaps her influence there would have faded by now. Jacob couldn't deny he was grateful she had stayed away. He needed to know how she had gotten in his head, but was unwilling to see her. She made him too angry.

Bella, on the other hand, had been like a sweet balm, and though he was forbidden from seeing her – at least the thought of her didn't make his heart rate pick up, and his gut and chest heat angrily.

**_Give it a rest, loser._**

Jacob snapped at Paul, and felt the man's indecision over stopping to fight with him, or keep running to get to food and a phone to call Kitty. If Jacob could roll his eyes, he would. It made him sick, how needy and dependant they all were, like the Imprint sucked every last-

**_I said, enough._**

Sam's voice carried enough Alpha weight to literally stop Jacob's train of thought, and he twitched under the force of it. He could smell they were close now, years old barriers of Sam's own scent warding off animal intruders, and to his surprise, he could smell himself, mixed with the others.

Embry nosed at his shoulder as they slowed in the copse of trees just before the house, where they kept spare clothing. _It's because you're Pack, too, Jake._ His friend's voice was kind, unchanged by the shit-show they had both found themselves in, and Jacob reminded himself that he wasn't alone, in any sense, anymore.

He Phased back as the others did, pulling on a pair of cut-offs, and brushing some dirt off his knees. When he straightened, Sam was fixing him with a stern look, arms crossed over his chest in a pose Jacob was beginning to associate with an oncoming lecture.

The others, also sensing the cue, filtered silently out of the clearing, and though Jacob knew they weren't out of earshot, he could appreciate the illusion of privacy.

"You need to talk to Alex." Sam begun, making him blink. Not _exactly_ how he thought Sam would begin, but okay.

"I know. I'll call her or something." Jacob said, maybe a little _too_ dismissively, because Sam sighed at him in exasperation.

"No. Face to face. What happened on Saturday proves that you need her-" Sam held up a hand as he opened his mouth to protest – what happened on Saturday was a freaky invasion of privacy and he was _not okay_ with it – but Sam didn't seem to care. "You claimed you decided to remain friends, but so far, I haven't seen any evidence of that either. Alex is Pack, Jacob, and she's been Pack longer than you have."

"Yeah, but only _because_ of me." Jacob argued. Sure, Alex had been 'accepted' by the wolves, but that was only because they could instinctually sense she was an Imprint. Or whatever.

Sam shook his head. "It doesn't matter. She is Pack, and she is your Imprint. You both have a responsibility to each other, whether you can accept it or not. Be the bigger man, Jacob." With that, Sam turned and left him there, and Jacob stood, scowling at where he had been.

_Be the bigger man…_

Jacob wasn't sure how to bury whatever emotions Alex inspired in him, but neither was he sure how to stop _missing_ her too. Missing what they had had. She had been his best friend, and maybe it was a wolf thing, but he couldn't just forget the loyalty they'd had. Sam was right – and _god,_ he couldn't believe he had just though that – they did need to talk.

He jogged towards the house, jumping lightly over the three porch steps, and let himself in to the house. At first, the silence confused him, already used to the loud chaos that cramming all of them under one roof inspired.

Embry turned as he crossed the threshold, eyes shining with a fond mirth, a finger to his lips, Paul gesticulating wildly behind him. He raised an eyebrow, peering around his friend to take in the scene in the living room.

For a moment, he just stared.

Because there she was: sprawled gracelessly on the living room floor, limbs wild, face slack and soft in sleep, strawberry-blonde hair falling out of braids atop her head, kept off her face with a pink fluffy headband. From here, he could see the pale purple colour of her nails, jarring in the fact that he'd never once seen her with her nails painted.

_Alex_.

The current bane of his existence, and yet the one person he'd been needing to see.


	23. Mine: Chapter 22

Ironically, it had been the loud hushing noises that woke her, rather than the faint chatter she became aware of as she returned to consciousness.

_Shit, _her back ached something awful.

She stretched, fingers digging into the tough fibres of what she realised was carpet, toes curling in her oddly fluffy socks. Ah – yes, the sleepover – which explained everything; the back pain, the hair off her face, her very toasty feet, the large robe wrapped around her. Everything but the faint laughter which had started up as she stirred, and the hushed whispers.

She opened her eyes slightly, squinting at the bright light, and sat up to eye the crowd of half-naked men clustered in the kitchen. Her first instinct was to tell them all to shut up, perhaps throw something at them, but then her eyes – drawn like a magnet, something snapping into place when their gazes collided – met Jacob's dark stare. His face was unreadable but his eyes were heavy, and she stilled.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty!" It was Embry's cackle that broke the tension, and she looked away from Jacob to Embry's grin. Guilt flared in her gut momentarily. Jacob wasn't the only one she'd been avoiding, and unbidden, Embry's face as he left her in the kitchen, his broken face behind Jacob's house. She stood a little unsteadily, catching Paul's eyes. He raised an eyebrow at her, and she shook her head. Paul would have whisked her away if she had wanted, she knew it. But she had to be a big girl, face her mistakes head on.

"Where's your sister?" Paul asked instead, sniffing at her a little disconcertingly. She wrinkled her nose at him.

"She's in the back I assume. With Em and Kim." Alex almost laughed as Jared perked up comically, and if he had been a wolf, she could just picture his tail wagging. Jared and Paul jostled each other as they walked through the hallway laughing about something in low tones. Sam, however, stayed put.

He looked between the three of them, meaningful and stern. Then he turned on his heel and headed down the hall after the others.

"Long time no see, Alex." Embry broke the silence again, and when she looked at him this time, he was looking at her a little reproachfully. Shame made her cheeks burn, and she took a step forwards to explain.

"Sorry, I just-" Alex was interrupted by Embry's sudden embrace, wheezing out the rest of her breath as he shook her playfully. He set her down and laughed, patting her head like a dog.

"I missed you, dude." He said easily. "And, I get it." His voice held a promise, something to be discussed later – but Alex knew her friend, and she didn't need him to say it aloud, didn't need him to point out the elephant in the room. But because he was also a dick, Embry did anyway. "Besides, I think you two have a lot to talk about." He said, far too cheerfully for someone making a quick of an exit as he was. Alex glared at him as he swiftly backpedalled from the room. Turning to Jacob, she saw he was scowling just as fiercely. Clearly, he was just as reluctant to be in the same room as her as she was to be with him.

Acknowledging the realisation that, yes, they were _alone_ in a room together made the strange flame in her chest ignite so strongly and suddenly that she sucked in a startled breath, and Jacob jumped, turning his scowl onto her. She pressed a hand into her sternum, massaging hard enough to ache, as if it would make the sensation stop. "Um. Let's go outside." She said shortly. Maybe the cool air and the lack of enclosing walls would stop the urge to reach out and touch him. She didn't wait for his answer before she was brushing past him, and even through the fluffy sleeve of her robe, the faint skim of her elbow against his forearm was enough to make her heart skip a beat.

_God, she hated this. It was so… unnatural. _

She wasn't sure exactly how far she had to go to be properly out of earshot of the wolves in the house, but when they were so far into the forest that she couldn't see Emily's house, and the soil beneath their feet was turning sandy – a sure sign they were nearing the ocean – Jacob stopped. It took her a few moments to register that he had, her feet the only thing making noise.

He wasn't looking at her, frowning at the tree two over from her. But he spoke first. "So when were you gonna tell me about the freaky head thing?"

Alex, still heated, had to fight to not snap at his accusing tone. "I was going to. But at first I wasn't allowed to tell anyone."

"What is it?" he asked, looking at her for a brief moment, curiosity clearly winning out over his obvious anger.

Alex shrugged, kicking her socked feet at the undergrowth. "Your dad thinks it's Dream Walking. But because no-one in the tribe has showed any signs for, like, forever, there's no definitive answer."

"Dream Walking." Jacob looked a little incredulous. "You're not Quileute."

"Yeah, duh. I know that. That's why I didn't know what it was at first." She rolled her eyes. "You think I was deliberately keeping it from you? It freaks me out, dude."

"You can say that again." Jacob said, eyes wide and almost smiling, and for a moment Alex felt like they were just friends again, just human, just idiots hanging out. Then, her chest heated again, and she was reminded of what they were. She hadn't even noticed she'd moved until Jacob gave her a look, and she realised she'd taken an involuntary lurch towards him.

"Sorry." She muttered, and took two steps back.

He shrugged. "Does Dad know why?"

Alex gave him a slightly disbelieving look. "Obviously because of you."

"Me?" he asked, frowning.

She waved a hand at him. "The only reason is because of this shit." She touched her chest lightly. "You're descended from Blacks, Alphas and direct descendants of the first wolves. Of course it's because of you. You've tied me to you, and whatever wolfy-god is up there is just trying to boost your power." Jacob's face slowly morphed into a frown again, and she sighed, wondering what exactly she had said to piss him off this time.

"I tied _you_ to _me?_" Jacob asked, and she almost laughed. "You think I want this?"

"_Obviously_ not." She snapped, "I'm just saying – if you had listened – that Dream Walkers are implicated to be alongside Alphas. It connects them more strongly to the Dream World, to their pack, to their-" she choked on the word. "_Mate_."

Jacob looked pretty close to gagging too. "Jesus Christ."

"Yep." Alex said shortly, folding her arms across her chest, hugging Sam's robe tighter to herself.

"And you can't… stop?"

She gave him a furious look. "You think I haven't tried?"

"I don't know. Kinda seems like something you'd like." He shrugged, looking mutinous. "Can't stay away from someone if they're in your head." Alex's jaw dropped.

"Ex-_cuse_ _me?_" She growled at him, and balled her fists. _Crap, just walk away, walk away, don't make things worse-_ "Fuck you, Black. Seriously, _fuck you_."

"What? Can't handle the truth?" Jacob asked, stepping towards her with a faint tremor that sent a spiral of nervousness up her spine. "Can't handle when people tell you you're unwanted?" they were close now, closer than she'd been to him since he'd Imprinted. It made her skin prickle.

Alex trembled, body seizing in pure rage – fed by the endless cycle of fury from both of them – and she leapt towards him. He was quicker than her, and she fell to her knees as he neatly side-stepped her, and she rose to her feet breathing heavily, lashing out at him with everything she had. "FUCK-" she punctuated each word with a savage swipe at him, freshly painted nails scratching at his bare chest with true vindication. "YOU!" she kicked at him, and he caught her ankle, grip just a shade too tight, tremors running over his body in earnest. "YOU THINK I GENIUENLY WANT THIS? I HATE IT! I HATE IT – AND I HATE **_YOU!_**" She had been hopping awkwardly, trying to rip her leg from his grip, but he tossed her casually, with so little effort it was embarrassing how far she flew, landing safely on the soft loam, but tangled in a heap, and she spat out leaves as she rose again.

"**_Trust me._**" Jacob's voice wasn't a yell as her own had been, but it shook with rage, and his jaw was clenched so tight he seemed to struggle to get the words out. "**_The feeling is fucking mutual."_**

She ran at him again, and he shook, splitting apart before her – and Alex _knew_, she fucking_ knew_ that she should have stopped, should have held back – but she was so goddamn angry that she didn't stop her furious hurtle towards him, even as his wolf reared up, snarling and snapping before her. _She wanted to hurt him, wanted to rip him apart, wanted to set them both on fire, try and overwhelm the hard beating pulse of the Imprint bond in her chest. _

The violence of her own impulse should have startled her too, but then she was upon him, biting down on his foreleg like she was an animal too. Her teeth were not sharp enough to do anything, and she couldn't even penetrate his thick overcoat, getting a mouthful of fur for her efforts, and he shook her off like an irritating fly.

She went tumbling over herself again, and when he snarled at her, bone-chilling and loud enough to make her ears ring, advancing on her with rage in his amber eyes – she just screamed at him, loud enough to drown out his noise.

In hindsight, she knew that they should have stood down then. Jacob should have left to calm down, she should have run and hid, should have removed herself. Because it was dangerous, he was dangerous, _they_ were dangerous in this red-hot place of anger they'd found themselves in.

But even as she heard howls in the trees, the crashing sound of the pack hurtling towards them, she was rising to her feet.

Jacob's teeth were bared, and there was a darkness in his eyes as he snarled again, bracing himself for her impact despite the fact she was a tiny, breakable non-threat. As the first of the wolves broke through the trees, Jacob's jaws descended and Alex's fingers – curled like claws – extended towards his eyes.

They fell together, tangled, and around them the world howled.


	24. Mine: Chapter 23

The first thought that entered Embry's mind when he watched Alex and Jacob crash into each other was not so much a thought as it was an alarming pulse of pure dread.

The Pack mind was alight with much the same; panic and fear – and anger that wasn't their own, anger that belonged to the Imprints before them, anger which had been so intense that it roused them where they had been sitting down for breakfast.

Paul was essentially bellowing, and Embry inched away from him as the grey wolf exploded forwards to separate the tangle of fur and human limbs. **_SHE'S DEAD, SHE'S FUCKING DEAD, HE FUCKING KILLED HER, I'LL KILL HIM, SHE'S-_**

Paul – none-to-gently – separated Alex's body from Jacob's and for one long horrible moment, Embry almost joined Paul's nonstop internal stream of nameless emotion. Because Alex _was_ still, eyes-closed, and limp as Paul nosed her over on her back. But then he realized Jacob was just as still and wasn't reacting to Sam's fangs around his throat as his Alpha roughly dragged him away from the prone girl.

Then Embry noticed that he couldn't _hear_ Jacob either, and at his realization the others quietened.

Jared, who had been running anxious circles around the scene, stopped. _Did they kill each other?_ His voice was uncertain, and he sniffed at both of them. _They're alive._ His voice was still as nonplussed.

Sam – who Embry realised had been blocking his thoughts from them – exploded into the forefront of all of their minds. His voice was a threat within itself. **Someone get Billy Black. Now.** With their Alpha tuned back into their stream of consciousness, Embry was treated to Sam's recollection of the scene, stomach turning at Sam's pure fear at seeing the pair collapse, the stark contrast of Alex's breakable form against all of Jacob's power.

He whimpered, and as Jared turned tail and ran, padded towards Alex. She _was_ alive, he had smelt what Jared had smelt; her blood, still running hot through her veins, heard her heart beating through his pack-mate's ears – but he needed to know himself.

Embry hadn't been fair to her, leaving her, ignoring her afterwards – though she hadn't been fair to him either, had given him much of the same treatment – he didn't want the last memories of each other to be so tainted. If she-

**She's alive, Embry. Don't worry. **

Sam's voice shut down his line of thought, and he whined again, huffing into her slack face and listening to her heartbeat himself. It was strangely elevated considering her unconscious state, but it was beating, which was all that mattered.

Sam had retreated to watch Jacob's still body, and Embry turned to his friend. It was odd – and he marvelled briefly at what had become his normality – to not hear Jacob despite his wolf being present right in front of him. As he watched however, Jacob's form twitched, and he straightened, alert – Sam hastening to join him, putting a precautionary paw over Jacob's throat.

They watched, nonplussed as he began to twitch and thrash, voice still absent from their heads, still visually unconscious. Embry looked at Sam, but Sam's wordless worry and confusion did nothing to quell his own discomfort. Embry whined again, and lowered his head to nuzzle his friend.

_Wake up, Jake._

* * *

_It worked. It had worked. _

_Alex had hoped, prayed that she could do it, that she could exert some kind of control over Jacob just as she had done on Saturday. She hadn't expected it to work so well._

_They had been both pulled into the unconscious state she so often found herself in as she Walked, but this time, she wasn't alone. _

_Jacob, spitting mad, was with her too, and this time he was aware of what she had done. _

**_Get out._**

_A growl, a wordless, bodiless growl – Jacob pushing at her with all his strength, to get **out get out get out get out get out-**_

_But she was stronger here, in this realm, and he didn't have his physical strength to rely on, and she wrestled him away from consciousness at the same time as she wrestled for control of his body. She could sense he was too angry to Phase back, the shock of her being in his head not enough to change him. _

_Stop it, Black._

_For all her own anger, here, so close to him, she was finally able to ascertain what was her own emotions and what were his, and at this realization, at this clinical dissection of where she ended and he began, she realized she was calming down. _

_We shouldn't have fought._

**_You started it._**

_He was right. She had started it. But she could end it, if he just stopped fighting her-_

**_I'm not some puppet you can play with. _**

_I'm sorry. I know. Can you just- we're too close. Physically, she meant. Here, she was at least able to consider the fact that she had foolishly attempted to fight his wolf, had ended up well within reach of his claws and jaws. If she retreated now, if he woke up this furious, then she was probably going to get hurt. More hurt._

**_I wouldn't hurt you._**_ He seemed almost offended at the suggestion, and their shared memories spilled between them like water, her own desire to mark him laid bare, his own true wish to do the same, before them both and all followed with incredible regret from both of them, so powerful that they shivered together. _

**_I wouldn't have._**_ He said, but sounded less sure, in light of what had just happened. And then he was remembering the way he had thrown her around the forest like a plaything and his curdling shame as enough to make her recoil alongside him. **Did I hurt you? **_

_His voice was small, as if he had suddenly shrunk, and she considered it – with some difficulty as she couldn't quite sense her physical body like this – but she was pretty sure she was fine. If you had, I probably wouldn't have attacked you the other two times._

**_You bit me._**_ He thought with a small measure of amusement that warmed the spark between them. **Alex, I- **_

_You should talk to Bella. Even as she gave him the notion, she could sense the closure of whatever tentative offering had sprung between them, and felt a measure of regret. And it's okay, Jacob. I'm fine._

**_I don't understand what happened though- _**_she could sense his mounting agitation, his physical form beginning to come life, and she held him still, unwilling to let him up. **Sorry, I can't – I think I'll-**_

_Will you trust me? Just this once. I promise I won't again, I just want to make sure you're not, like, on top of me or something._

_More discomfort, but it was a physical sensation she was sure they could both feel when he wordlessly agreed, and she slid into place in the forefront of his conscious, and gently opened his eyes-_

* * *

Jacob's eyes opened suddenly, and the sudden horror movie-esque moment made Embry jump in place. Billy – from where he was leaning over his son's still head – didn't react. Sam had remained in his wolf form, but Embry had shifted back to help Jared bring Billy to the scene. Paul was still too worked up, and secretly Embry was glad to get out of his head. He wasn't sure how Sam could handle Paul's constant stream of negativity, but figured the Alpha probably had practice at shutting him out.

"Hey, son." Billy said, and then frowned. "Alex?"

Jacob – but it wasn't Jacob – whined softly, and Embry stared hard at his friend's body. He saw it then, a different softness in his friend's amber eyes that wasn't Jacob. "Her- your body is fine." Billy said, almost knowingly, and Sam growled as Jacob – no, Alex – got unsteadily to his feet. Alex turned Jacob's head to look for her form, and when she spotted it, there was an odd moment of nothingness in Jacob's irises.

The sudden gasp from Alex – the real Alex this time – drew Embry's attention and he turned to see her sit up like a corpse possessed, face alive, but pale. By the time he looked back at Jacob, his friend had Phased human, and was sitting at his father's feet looking shell-shocked.

"I'm okay, Paul." Alex was muttering, and Embry turned to see her wrapping her arms around Paul's big head. "Go home." She said a little tiredly, and Sam let out a growl that made Embry's stomach flip, his wolf turning in anxious circles. Paul took off, and Embry looked at Sam.

Embry didn't need to be Phased to read Sam's expression, which was clearly telling him to buzz off, but then Alex stood and put a hand on his arm. "Can he stay? Please?" she sounded tired, but she held Sam's gaze with intent. Finally, Sam snarled, and turned to Jared instead.

"I'll stay close-by." Jared said, sounding more somber than Embry had ever heard him before. Sam huffed in acknowledgement, shadowing his Second out of sight.

Embry turned to Alex. "Are you okay?" he asked her lowly, unable to keep the urgency out of his voice. She shrugged, eyes going to Jacob, and Embry realised their friend was listening, shivering with something other than the forewarning tremors that usually plagued him. "What happened?"

"That's a question I think we'd all like the answer to." Billy said, and leveled Alex with a look so serious that Embry wondered how she didn't crumble before him like he thought he probably would. "Jacob?" he turned his eyes to his son.

"Yes. I would very much like to know why the _fuck_ you were fighting with your _human_ Imprint." Sam's voice made Embry flinch, feeling the urge to tuck his non-existent ears back, to put his non-existent tail between his legs and bare his neck in submission. "You could have _killed _her. In fact, I'm surprised you _didn't_."

There was an edge to Sam's voice that Embry had never heard before and he found himself sinking to his knees in response, Jacob's head tilting instinctively, open lines of his throat bared. Even Billy twitched, fingers tightening on the arms of his wheelchair.

Because this is what Sam knew. Sam knew _just _what damage could be inflicted, had inflicted the damage himself – and he and Emily hadn't even been fighting, hadn't been so close that the sheer weight of Sam could have crushed her, not close like Alex and Jacob had been – and Sam knew that it was irreversible. Sam knew that scars didn't fully heal, that a loss of control left a mark, and that Jacob could have killed Alex.

_Jacob could have killed Alex_.

"It's not on him, Sam." Alex spoke, the only one of them unbent by the sheer power the Alpha was exerting, radiating in his anger. She did, however, flinch a little when his eyes landed on her. "It's not _all_ on him." She amended. "I started it."

"Do you really think," Sam began, obviously fighting to maintain control. "That I care who _started_ it?" he made a wordless sound of disbelief. "This isn't some childish, playground dispute. This is life and death, and do not for one second think I am not angry about you placing yourself in harm's way." Sam continued. "The pair of you are-"

"If I may, Sam." Billy interrupted gently, and though it took Sam a moment to clench his jaw and nod, he gave in with grace to the elder. "I would like to know _why_ this all happened, and _what_ exactly happened."

* * *

Alex looked at Jacob, who was still staring at the ground. He was naked and shivering, and she bit her lip, guilt and sorrow rising in her so swiftly she felt her eyes well up. She blinked hard, dispelling the unwanted moisture, and cleared her throat. Embry was still on his knees beside her, and though she knew how uncomfortable he must have been, she couldn't help but be grateful for his presence. She didn't exactly want to get into the finer details of their argument, nor did she think Sam would like to hear that she'd 'placed herself in harm's way' _twice_ before he had arrived. "We were just-"

"We were talking. About her Dream Walking." Jacob spoke for the first time, voice hollow. "Then we started arguing. She told me that it was because of me that it happened. I didn't like that. So then I said-"

"He called me stupid." Alex interrupted him. He looked up, frowning at her but she ignored him. "So I told him to go fuck himself. And then we started fighting. I tried to claw his eyes out." She said, in a matter of fact tone that drew a faint smile from Jacob as he lowered his gaze again.

"You tried to…" Sam drew in a deep breath. "And then?"

"Then he pushed me away, I fell, and then he Phased." Alex continued, trying her hardest to avoid looking at Jacob. "You came when I jumped at him again. I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking." She said, lowering her own head. "I was just so angry."

From beside her, Embry shifted. "Yeah, we could – well, we definitely felt that."

Billy made a small noise of understanding. "The Imprint bond strengthens the emotional connection. You are, all of you, connected in a way. Emily to Jared through Sam, Paul to Alex through Kitty and Jacob. A web of connection – with none so strong as the direct bonds between the Imprinted and Imprintee." Billy folded his arms across his chest. "I'd guess being apart would have created a build-up of emotion. Together, it gets let out, and together, you feel it." Alex grimaced. "Like the breaking of a dam."

"Great." Sam said, a little sarcastically, "Well, now we've gotten to the bottom of _why_ exactly you thought it was a good idea to have a brawl in the forest, can I ask why exactly the pair of you tapped out?"

"What do you mean?" Jacob asked, frowning a little.

Embry got to his feet, brushing down his knees. "You were both unconscious. Jake – you weren't even in the," he tapped his temple, "Pack-link."

"I think that was me." Alex said, raising her hand and feeling stupid when they all looked at her. "Well, I mean, I've Walked in Jacob before, and I made him stop…" she explained a little unsurely to Billy, casting a glance at Sam for help.

Sam nodded, "It wasn't like the other times, Billy. She was there on Saturday, in my head for a moment, but when she went to Jacob, she was able to take control. It's like you said, the connection between them is stronger."

_Like he said?_ Alex wanted to ask what exactly had been said in this apparent private conversation between Billy and Sam, but at Billy's hum that usually preceded a thoughtful speech, she held her tongue. "You're not wrong, Alex." He said, and she started a little in surprise.

"_I'm not?"_

_"She's not?"_

She and Jacob spoke at the same time, both with the same – insulting, coming from him – surprised tone of voice. She glared at him, and despite his shivery state, he managed to muster a similar scowl. Billy chuckled. "When you said that Jacob was the reason for your Walking. It can be the only reason. Just as you seem to be able to exert an amount of control over him, unlike the other Walks."

"What's the use of that?" Alex blurted before she could stop herself. "Sorry – I just…I don't really see how me being able to take the wheel of Jacob's wolfy-body really helps anybody."

Billy smiled slightly. "Unfortunately, I don't have an answer for that either." He sighed, and looked from the back of Jacob's head to her, speculatively. "But I want to think there is a reason."

Alex shook her head, and turned her gaze to the sky. The cloud cover was lifting slightly, fast moving clouds moving to reveal a watery blue sky. She felt tired. She hadn't been telling the entire truth; her body _ached_, and she had no doubt she'd be bruised by the ordeal.

Sam uncrossed his arms. "Alex, Embry will take you home now. Have a shower and something to eat, but know we're not done." He turned. "Jared!" he called, and within the minute, Jared reappeared. "Will you take Billy back up to the house?"

The two under orders set about it immediately, and though Alex wondered if Sam knew he was imbuing so much Alpha directive into his voice deliberately. She still dug her heels in as Embry began to gently but firmly direct her out of the clearing. "Wait – Sam." Sam looked at her, and she swallowed. "Can we… I mean, I don't want my sister to know."

Sam frowned. "She probably knows already, Alex."

"Right." Alex sighed. "Okay. Um. I guess I'll talk to you later."

"Come on, Alex." Embry said quietly, locking his arm around her waist a little more firmly, and pulling her along with him. When they were mostly alone – she couldn't say they were out of earshot – he stopped, and turned her by her shoulders, holding her firmly in place. "What were you _thinking_?" he hissed, eyes suddenly alight with worry and anger.

"I wasn't." She told him honestly. Embry deserved honesty. Embry deserved… well better than her. "I'm sorry, and not just for all this. I'm sorry for being a shitty friend, Embry. I'm sorry for not being more understanding about…" she gestured between them.

Embry gave her a pitying look. "It's not just you. I'm sorry too." He let go of her shoulders in favour of grabbing her hands, and squeezed them. "At least I know why I liked you, though." Alex frowned, and he barked a laugh. "Jake's Imprint; it was just pulling me to you. As the only one close to Phasing, it makes sense right?"

"Right." She echoed faintly. Then she frowned. "Wait, so you're saying you would have never had a crush on me if not for Jacob?" At his nervous giggle, she withdrew her hands from his and punched his shoulder. He winced more out of commiseration for her yelp of pain, and slung an arm around her shoulders instead. "Fuck you, Em. I'm a catch." She grumbled.

"Hey, you're a good kisser, I'll give you that much." He said with a laugh, and the distinct feeling of discomfort made her squirm out of his hold.

"Never say that again." She said, "Or I _will_ find a way to kill you."

"Sure, sure." Embry said, and reached for her hand again. This time, she let him take it, and though it was a reminder, it also felt _right_. It felt good to have Embry smile at her again, to be his friend again. She interlaced their fingers, and swung their arms lightheartedly. She knew that Embry's reproach would only be the first of many, and truth be told, it was starting to hurt to even walk, her shoulder hurting as she moved her arm.

But she was alive. That was that mattered – and she would never let it happen again. She had to find a way to stop their anger getting the better of them. She had to.


	25. Mine: Chapter 24

She was sleeping.

_Damnit._

It was the first time Jacob had been able to see her in days, and she wasn't even awake.

Jacob took a step closer to Bella's house, and lobbed another small stone at her window. It pinged off with another loud crack, and he winced, hoping he hadn't damaged the glass. That would kinda destroy the whole rom-com thing he had been going for.

When Sam and he had been left alone in the clearing that afternoon, after the shit-show between him and Alex, Jacob had expected more of a reaming from his Alpha. Instead, Sam had sat down and looked like he was about to cry for a good five minutes. Jacob had had _no_ idea what he was supposed to do, and had stood there awkwardly until his Alpha finally looked at him.

_"You have no idea," _Sam had begun carefully, _"what you could have destroyed."_ Jacob had been more moved by the wobble in Sam's voice than anything else, and he had sat, next to Sam. "_You don't understand how lucky you are. That she is alive."_ And that had been it. Well, almost it. Sam had lifted the 'no-seeing' Bella order, though the gag-order was still very firmly in place.

But that didn't matter.

Jacob Black had a plan.

And step one of 'Make-Bella-Swan-My-Girlfriend-And-Also-Possibly-My-Wife', was to clue her in on the big secret starting with 'W'. Lucky for Jacob, he had already told her. Now he just needed her to remember.

He threw another stone at her window, the sudden leap in her pulse rate telling him he'd woken her. He waited. For a long moment, he could hear her just breathing, unmoving. He threw another stone.

"Bella!" he whispered, as loud as he dared, and then she appeared.

She looked… beautiful. Just as beautiful as he remembered. Mussed from sleep, and so, so, soft looking, delicate. His cheeks hurt and he realised that it was probably the first time he had smiled properly since he had phased.

She frowned, bemusement making her eyebrows furrow, and she opened her window. "You scared me. What the hell are you doing?" she asked, voice a little irritated, and Jacob winced. He probably deserved that, after the harsh radio silence and not-so-gentle let down at his house.

But he had some _apologizing _and _wooing_ to do, damn it!

"Back up, I'm coming up." He told her, and she frowned again, stepping back slightly. He scaled the side of the house with ease, throwing in a few extra flips and jumps for effect, almost losing his grip once, but the resulting surprised exhale she let out when he landed was well worth it. Jacob noticed the way she was eyeing him, as if she'd never seen him before and thanked his instinct to leave his shirt at home. She swallowed, and he followed the movement of her pale throat a little hungrily. Inside him, that little fire that never went out smouldered slightly, and he ignored it in favour of stepping a little closer to her. "Hey." He said, hoping his voice didn't wobble.

She didn't respond, and a desperation made him move closer. This wasn't going how he had wanted it – though admittedly his fantasy of her drooling over his uber-cool ninja moves was a little far fetched. "Look, Bells, I'm sorry, I never meant-"

She stopped his motion, raising her clenched fist to rest on his abs, and he watched as a small spark of desire lit briefly in her eyes, warring with her hurt. "For what?" she said, a little resignedly, and he clenched his jaw at the shut-off look in her eyes, the same look he'd tried so hard to erase.

"I-" The sudden tightening of his throat made him want to growl. _He wasn't going to say anything. _"I wish I could explain." He said instead. "But I _literally_ can't." he moved around her, unwilling to let her see the anger he was sure was on his face. He didn't want to frighten her. Jacob's eyes caught on his dreamcatcher hanging on the head of her bed. _Not all hope lost then._ "Have you ever had a secret; you couldn't tell anyone? One that wasn't yours to share?" he sat then, holding her gaze. She looked confused, torn, unreadable. He _knew_ she had. It was just a matter of whether she would admit it. "Well, that's what it's like for me. But worse." He added, for good measure. "You have no idea how tight I- I," he forced the words out, "How tight I'm bound."

Bella broke, stepping towards him. "I hate this." She muttered, and the feeling of her hands in his hair made him suck in a breath. _God, he had missed her._ "I hate what they've done to you."

A snatch of a conversation he had never had came back to him: _"It is the last thing I want, Embry… It's stolen your future and your life."_

The sudden thought of Alex filled his head, and he rose, brushing away Bella's hand unconsciously, trying to shake the thought of her. "I mean, the killer part is that you already know." He said, voice louder than he had intended, because the little flame was sparking, just at the _thought_ of her, regret and guilt and longing – that he _knew_ was artificial, it _had_ to be – filling his gut. Bella was looking at him, eyes wide and he stilled, turning back to her, taking her hands in his, eyeing the silvery-scar on the inside of her wrist, the mark of a leech. "Bella." He began, taking a breath, "do you remember when we walked on the beach at La Push?"

_She'd been surfing, Embry had done up her wet-suit for her, and Jacob had thought she looked a little like Cat Woman. Jacob had remembered looking at the dip of her waist and the length of her legs a moment longer than he should have, and then-_

_Bella. Stop. Focus on Bella_. Jacob willed her to remember. "The st-" His throat closed again, and he shut his mouth.

But Bella – beautiful, constant – was there, and she smiled a little. "The story. The story about… the Cold Ones." She was nodding.

A wave of frustration made him clench his jaw. "I guess I understand why that's the only part you remember." He let her go, and moved away a little.

"There's gotta be something, that you can do." Bella said, looking pained.

He closed his eyes briefly. "No. I'm in it for life."

Bella flinched slightly. "Maybe we should just get out of here for a while." Something nameless in Jacob's chest opened its mouth in a silent plea. "We'll just leave. Just you and me."

"You'd do that?" Jacob wanted to.

"I would do it for you." Bella said earnestly, and Jacob wanted nothing more than to say yes_. He'd never wanted anything more in his life-_

But his wolf was calling for the pack, for his family, for the trees, for Al-

"It's not something I can just run away from, Bella." If he could, he would. He would leave it all behind if he could. "But I would run away with you. If I could." Bella frowned, hugging herself unconsciously. He'd upset her. Again. "I gotta go." He said, "They're probably wondering where I am." He should go, he should take his own advice, but Bella was standing there, worrying at her lip, eyes brimming with emotion – and he couldn't. "Come here." He said, a little breathlessly, and pulled her into his arms.

She went willingly, letting out a soft huff of air against his chest, and as her arms snaked around his waist, he felt his heart flip. _This is what was right. This was what mattered. _"Please…try to remember." He whispered into her ear. "It'd be so much easier. If you knew." He stepped away from her.

"I'll try." She said, sounding a little petulant. "But, Jake-" he was already heading for the window. He _did_ need to go, he'd been out of La Push for too long without telling Sam, and he could sense the distant echoes of his Alpha's summons the longer he lingered. "Wait, Jake. Jake, what are you doing?" she was nervous, he realized, that he wouldn't make the jump from her window.

The grass was barely disturbed as he landed soundlessly, and he almost looked back, just to see if she'd be making that awestruck expression. But his wolf was pulling him, pulling him to the trees, to the water. _Back to La Push. _

It was only as he had made it back across the border, Sam in his ear telling him to get home, that he realized he wasn't finished. Not really. He had one more stop to make, but this time, his wolf was eager, and Sam relented.

Jacob turned East and found his way along the waterline. He knew his paws would take him where he needed to go.

* * *

Alex was awake when her chest began to tighten and grow warmer.

She hadn't been able to sleep, the aches and pains of her body had grown more obvious since she'd gotten home, and she wasn't even able to lie comfortably – and she had given up on sleep in favor of watching the sky, trying to work through the constant ebb and flow of emotions that had been coming through since the sun had set.

Whatever had released between them in the fight had only served to make that strange connection more sensitive. Alex could _feel_ Jacob now; and could sense his emotional range. He had been excited since sundown, equal parts joyful and regretful since midnight had struck, and his surge of hope had been enough to make her start sweating. It was as if she was a raw nerve, where she had once been numb to all but his fiercest anger, now she could feel _everything._

She wondered if he could feel her too.

Alex sat up slowly, something innate telling her that he was close. She massaged at her sternum, trying to will the call to ease, her own body's reaction growing stronger.

She hated this. Hated the way her emotions weren't her own, the way her body wanted him, hated the way her heart sped up when she thought of him. It was unnatural.

Even if things hadn't been so muddled between them, even if they hadn't fought, even if they'd been on good terms – it was still strange to be pulled to him so violently. Alex hadn't been romantically attracted to Jacob _before_ he had turned, so why should she just relax into the artificial pull? Sure, Alex had known her friend was attractive – she wasn't blind – but Alex hadn't ever thought of him in that capacity.

Alex hadn't _ever_ thought of anyone in that capacity before Embry, and even that had turned out to be wolfy-mojo as well.

She maneuvered herself out of her bed, trying her best to be quiet as she went down the stairs – made harder by her faint limp – her aching left ankle making the journey harder than it needed to be. Alex had made it a few steps onto the lawn by the time Jacob stepped out of the trees, and she almost smiled at his look of surprise to see her there.

"I thought you'd be asleep." He said, blinking at her.

She shrugged. "Not tired."

They stood in uncomfortable silence for another long moment, before Jacob cleared his throat. "Um. I came to..." he paused, and Alex raised a brow. She was wondering why he had come too – she hadn't been expecting an apology. "Why did you lie?" he blurted, looking a little surprised at his own words.

Alex frowned. "What?"

"To Sam." Jacob said, as if it clarified anything. She just stared at him, wishing that she could sit down and take the pressure off her ankle and hip. "About what I said." He swung his arms a little awkwardly. "When I said that you liked being able to Dream Walk, because-"

"I remember, thanks." Alex bit out. She'd been trying hard not to think about Jacob's words. Because they had hurt. Because they _still_ hurt. Jacob was apparently, genuinely waiting for an answer. She folded her arms across her chest, ignoring the pain that radiated from her right shoulder, and tilted her head to the sky. "I guess I didn't think it was worth causing more shit."

"Oh." Jacob blinked, looking a little surprised.

"What? Did you think I'm saving it for blackmail or something?" Alex asked, scowling at him. He was half-naked, and the moonlight was playing distractingly across the expanse of his chest, and Alex hated herself for looking, for being distracted, if even for a moment.

Jacob gaped at her, shaking his head once. "No! I just- I don't know. I wanted to know why. I feel like-" he cut himself off, clenching his jaw hard enough to make the muscle flutter.

"Like what?" Alex prompted him, taking a step towards him. He said nothing, and she took another step forwards, cursing inwardly at how easy it was to move _towards _him. "Tell me. You owe me that much, Black."

Jacob met her eyes, and Alex felt the hot surge of his irritation in her chest, and scowled at him, willing him to feel her own. At his harsh inhale, she guessed he could. "I feel like I don't know you anymore." He said finally, voice clipped. "You're not- you're not _Alex_ anymore. I don't know. You were different before."

"Right. Because you've remained _so_ steadfast and unchanging." Alex rolled her eyes. "It's all me, isn't it?"

"Jesus! _This _is what I mean! You've never been so _prickly._" Jacob's fists clenched and unclenched at his side. "At least, not to me. Never to me." He sounded reminiscent, and Alex wished so badly that she could bring back the peace that they had once had.

"Yeah, well." She muttered, and tried to turn away from him, tried to take a step in the direction of the house. To her humiliation, her ankle gave out on her, and she crumpled with a hiss of pain.

Hot hands closed around her shoulders, and she shuddered as Jacob eased her to her feet. Her skin was singing under his touch, and she almost leant into him. But it was easier to ignore the sensation for the pain of his touch on her sensitive skin. She let out a pained groan before she could stop herself and tried to shake herself free from his grip. He let go as if he'd been burnt, ducking to catch her gaze. "What's wrong? What did I do?"

Alex grit her teeth, trying to keep her wounded noises from escaping. She waved a hand at him, her other hand coming up to probe gingerly at the sore spot he'd inadvertently gripped. "It's nothing."

Jacob ran a hand through his hair, eyeing her with worry in his eyes. "Alex…" She scowled at him, attempting to take another step. It cost her, and she had to drop her eyes in favour of biting back her expletive. "At least let me help you get upstairs."

Before she could protest, he had swept her off her feet, arms holding her gently under the crook of her knees and just below her shoulder blades. She felt small in his grip, and avoided his eyes on her face as he walked silently up her stairs, nudging open her bedroom door.

He stood there with her, still eyeing her, and she cleared her throat. "You can put me down now, asshole."

"Oh. right." Jacob coughed a little nervously, and lightly placed her down on her feet. He was frowning, and she caught his expression in her mirror as she turned towards her bed. Guilt – not her own, but his – was building in her chest. "It's because of me, isn't it?" he asked, so quietly that if she hadn't been waiting for him to speak, she would have missed it.

She met his gaze in the mirror. "If I remember correctly, I was the one who jumped you." Jacob bit at his bottom lip, eyes moving between her face and her body. "Seriously."

"Let me see." Jacob whispered.

Alex turned back to him, whipping around so fast her neck cricked. "Excuse me?"

Jacob rolled his eyes. "Alex, I need to see." She gave him an incredulous look. He didn't relent, holding her gaze until she sighed.

"Fine." She tugged off her shirt, expecting him to flinch and look away, but his eyes had zeroed in on her shoulder, horror dawning on his features. "Dude, it's fine, I told you. I probably need to strap my ankle, but it's-"

He reached for her, spinning her around with a low growl. She tensed at the sound, at the light dance his fingers were doing over the expanse of her shoulder blade, down the left side of her spine. She looked at herself in the mirror, the thick straps of her sports bra doing nothing to hide the beginnings of what looked like a massive bruise on the top of her shoulder. She twisted, knocking away his hand to look for herself.

It was already purpling, spanning the top of her left shoulder to about half-way down her spine, a perfect indentation of where she'd landed on her side. Her bare arms sported other various spots of bruising, and she touched her scraped elbow absently. "Oh shit." She said mildly.

"I'm sorry." Jacob's voice was bitten out, and when she looked at his reflection in the mirror, she realised he was trembling, reminiscent of his shell-shocked state after their fight. "Fuck. Alex, I'm so sorry."

She frowned, and turned to look at him properly. "Jacob – don't." He shook his head, lips drawing back near unconsciously to bare his teeth. She moved towards him, and gripped his jaw. "Don't be fucking stupid."

"I _did_ that." He said, gesturing wildly at her, but let her hold his head in place. "Alex…" he let out a low whine, and pressed a hand over his heart, face contorting. "He hates it. _I've hurt you, and he's furious."_

It took Alex too long to work out that he was referring to the wolf inside of himself. _Creepy_. She thought, and tightened her grip on his chin. "Well, then just tell him to toughen up. Jacob – I brought this on myself. You understand? You could have ripped me to _shreds_, Jacob-" he whined again, and she huffed out an impatient breath. "You could have! But you didn't. You _didn't._ Jacob, we both know that I've beaten myself up worse than this just skating."

His eyes were wild, and dangerous tremors were still racking his frame. A distant fear of him exploding on her again made her swallow, and she stepped closer to him just to spite the stupid fear. "You remember? The first summer we met? You told me that I needed to be careful, because the roads were uneven. I told you that I could handle it." Jacob's eyes had fixed on hers, with such an intensity that her breath stuttered in her throat. "And then you came with me anyway, you rode your bike, all the way – and when I fell, you were right beside me." Jacob stilled, and Alex couldn't help but smile at the memory. She had fallen hard, her board's wheel coming loose and sending her tumbling along the cement. She'd sprained her wrist, bruised up her whole body, scratched up her legs enough to stop her wearing pants until the scrapes had healed. "You were right beside me, and you held my hand and you pretended not to notice that I cried a little bit."

Jacob nodded. "I remember." He sounded better, and she let go of his jaw.

His eyes remained on her own, and when he breathed a deep, slow breath, their bare torsos brushed against each other, drawing goose bumps to her skin. She realised in a flushing rush that she was still shirtless, and _far_ too close for comfort, and took a hasty step back, wincing as her ankle protested. She cleared her throat, turning her back to him, and tugging on her shirt. "Anyway. It's fine. I'll be fine."

"Alex-" His voice was low, and she didn't need to look in the mirror to know that his gaze was still on her.

"So, how's Bella?" She spoke over him, busying herself with looking for the roll of medical tape she kept in her bedside table.

"How'd you know I-?" Jacob sounded surprised, but the next moment he was smiling to himself. "She's really good. She's perfect. I missed her so much, and I thought that maybe she wouldn't want to talk to me, but she's still…"

"Bella." Alex supplied, ignoring the faint discomfort his words inspired. The feeling was surely as artificial as her desire to touch him. It had to be.

"Yeah. Still Bella." Jacob said. Alex kept her head down, carefully wrapping up her ankle. She didn't think it was terribly sprained, but it wouldn't hurt to keep it strapped in case it turned out to be worse than some bruising. "You sure you're alright?"

Alex looked up then, met his eyes with a smile. "Peachy keen, jelly bean."

He raised an eyebrow, but didn't argue the point. "I should probably get going."

"Yeah. Probably." Alex said, lying back on her side. He lingered for a moment longer on her threshold, and she looked at him. "What?"

"Will I see you tomorrow?" he asked.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Why?"

He sighed, annoyance making its home in the crease of his brow. "Never mind. Goodnight, Alex." He left before she could respond, and she stared at the door he'd closed behind him.

"Good night, Jake." She whispered into the quiet, willing the disappointment unfurling in her gut away. For a moment, she had _wanted_ him to want her, and she couldn't afford to feel that way.


	26. Mine: Chapter 25

"-irresponsible, reckless, thoughtless, and not to mention _incredibly_ dangerous! Do you not understand how much danger you put yourself and the others in? If something had happened, what would mom and dad do?"

Alex's head lolled listlessly to the side as Kitty's rant continued to wash over her. Her sister had thankfully left her alone that evening, and Alex had even begun to hope that perhaps Paul _hadn't_ told Kitty what had happened. Her sister had even lulled her into a false sense of security over breakfast, offering to drive Alex to Emily's on the way to her work.

It was only after they'd pulled out of the driveway that Kitty had let loose, and Alex had been suffering ever since. They were still five minutes out from Emily's house, and her sister showed no signs of slowing her rant.

"Can you drop me at Jacob's house?" Alex said, interrupting Kitty's flow, and making her sister glare at her.

"Why? I thought you wanted to go to Em's?" Kitty sounded suspicious, and Alex had to think quickly.

She sighed theatrically, turning her head to stare longingly out of the window. "Oh, I did. But… I need to see Jacob… I can't bear to be away from him another moment… y'know how it is." She winced to herself, thinking she'd over done it, but Kitty made a soft noise, and when she looked at her sibling, she caught Kitty brushing a hand under her eyes quickly. She almost laughed, turning it into another long loud sigh. "The Imprint… it calls to me, calls to his," she frowned, trying to think of a word. "Heart." She settled on, and Kitty melted.

"Oh, I understand, Lexie… That's fine. I'll drop you at Billy's now. Make sure you guys stay out in the open, okay? Sam and Paul are still unhappy about yesterday..." she trailed off, face twisting. Alex wondered if something had happened between her sister and Paul after she'd gone home. Maybe Kitty had been quiet during dinner because of something else.

"Are you okay?" Alex asked, suddenly feeling guilty, and Kitty coughed, clearly pretending not to hear her. But true to her word, Kitty took the next turn off, and Alex was freed from her fifteen-minute lecture as Jacob's red-painted house came into view.

To her surprise, Jacob's car wasn't the only vehicle in the driveway. Beside her, Kitty frowned. "Isn't that Isabella Swan's truck?" she asked, turning to Alex. Alex eyed the aged vehicle, sans it's brunette driver. Bella must have come over to see Jacob – though why, Alex couldn't guess. She knew Jacob was forbidden from saying anything about the tribe's secrets, and though he'd gone to see Bella before he'd visited her, Alex couldn't think why the other girl had come to see him so soon afterwards.

"Yeah." She opened the door. "I'll go say hi."

"No – wait, Alex! We're not finished-" Kitty's voice was cut off as Alex shut the door behind herself. Her sister gunned the engine twice in obvious frustration, but as Alex made her way towards the house without turning back, she heard her sister drive off.

She jogged up the front porch steps, hand outstretched to knock, when it opened, and she was met with a mouthful of brown hair as whoever had barreled out of the door came crashing into her.

Alex swore, one arm grabbing at the porch rail to stop herself from falling back, and the other coming up to steady the shorter girl who was trying to disentangle herself. "I'm so sorry!" The distinctly feminine voice made Alex release her, and she took a step back as Bella Swan pushed her hair out of her eyes. Her doe-eyes widened further as she met Alex's gaze. "Oh, Alexandra – I'm sorry."

Alex resisted the urge to frown. "It's cool. Were you, uh, visiting Jacob?" she asked, casting a look over Bella's shoulder into the house. There was no sign of movement. Bella bit her lip, looking a little guilty.

"I was, I needed to tell him- well." She cut herself off, giving Alex a secretive look. "Something private." Alex almost laughed. It seemed Jacob _had_ found a way around the gag-order. He was certainly creative; Alex could give him that much. "But he's asleep. I decided to let him rest, he was up late last night." Another secretive look.

Alex nodded. "Well, that's kind of you." Bella frowned a little, opening her mouth to speak, when a loud call from the trees startled them both. Alex turned, catching sight of four familiar forms emerging from the tree line beside Jacob's backyard. Sudden motion from Bella made her swear again as the shorter girl brushed past her, breaking into a run towards Sam, Jared, Paul and Embry.

Alex kicked off after her, jumping the steps, and catching up to her in a few long strides. "Bella, wait!" She grabbed the girl's arm, trying to haul her to a stop, but Bella rounded on her, furious.

"Get off me, _Alexandra_!" Bella shoved at her, Alex letting her go in surprise. Bella rounded on the boys again. "What did you do?" she shouted, striding towards them. "What did you do?" She pushed Sam, as hard as she could. Alex broke into another run after her.

Paul growled, low and loud. Sam didn't even look at him. "_Easy…_" he told him, and Alex edged towards Paul, hoping she could calm him down. "Alex?" Sam looked at her then, accusation in his eyes, and Alex halted in place. "What did you say?"

"He didn't want this!" Bella continued, voice bordering on hysterical.

Alex scowled. "What the fuck, Sam?" Sam ignored her.

"What did _we_ do?" Paul asked, voice dangerous, and Alex took a big step away from him, still glaring at Sam. "What did _he _do? Hmm? What did he tell you?"

Bella hadn't moved, and Alex wasn't sure if the girl was being brave or stupid, as she watched Paul tremble. Paul was unstable right now, and Bella needed to _back up_. "Both of you calm down!" Sam put a hand on Paul's chest, shoving him back a few feet. A large hand curled around her wrist, and Alex turned to Embry. He raised a brow, but said nothing, and Alex let him pull her a little closer, a little further from the scene unfolding.

Bella stood her ground. "Nothing! He tells me nothing, because he's scared of you!" Alex blinked, exchanging a disbelieving look with Embry. Then, two things happened in quick sequence, and it all went to hell.

Paul burst into laughter, shoulders shaking. And then Bella slapped him.

"Bella! Get back!" Alex yelled, darting for the girl as Paul shivered, gulped in one large breath – and exploded into the Phase. Sam and Jared were shouting for him to calm down, but Alex knew it was far too late.

"Alex!" Embry called for her, but she had already closed her arms around Bella's chest in a parody of a bear hug, dragging the girl backwards several feet as Paul roared and snarled.

Bella let out a high, short sound of fright, hands coming up and gripping her forearms, unconsciously digging her nails into Alex's skin in her fear. Alex winced, and roughly twirled them around, dumping Bella on the ground and turning to face Paul. He was growling, stalking towards them as Bella scrambled backwards, Alex keeping low to the ground, and stretching out a hand in supplication. "Paul, _calm down_, she didn't mean it!" He shook his head as if he was shaking off her words, and bunched his muscles, clearly readying himself to spring. "Fuck. Run." Bella was still on the ground, scooting awkwardly, and Alex risked turning her back on Paul to haul her up again. "Run, Bella!"

Bella ran, and Alex threw herself to the side as Paul sprung at them. She went falling out of the way of his spring, gracelessly tumbling down the hillock.

"BELLA!" From the porch, Jacob yelled the other girl's name, and then he was running towards them too, as Paul rocketed towards Bella, who was stumbling her way towards the house.

"Jacob! Run! Get back!" Bella cried out, and as Alex rolled to a halt, she caught the height of Jacob's leap – watching in amazement as he Phased in mid-air. He landed growling, staring Paul down where the other wolf had halted.

There was a long beat of stillness, before Paul sprung again, and Alex's heart leapt into her throat. She needn't have worried, as Jacob intercepted Paul with finesse, jaws and claws clashing as the two wolves crashed into each other with enough force to make the ground shake slightly. They rolled together, neither seeming to gain the upper hand for long, destroying the small fishing dingy sitting upon a stand as Jacob herded Paul towards the woods.

The sounds of their fight lingered in the air long after they disappeared from sight, and Alex let out a shaky sigh of relief as Jared and Embry jogged towards her, Sam following at a more sedate pace. "You okay, Alex?" Embry asked, ignoring her attempts to wave them off, and hauling her to her feet quick enough to make her head spin. Jared gave her a pat down as Embry checked her pupils as if she had suffered a concussion.

Finally, she punched Embry in the gut to make him back off, turning to look at Bella, who was still sitting in a heap on the grass, paler than normal. "I'm _fine,_ losers. Go check on her."

Sam nodded. "Take Bella to Emily's. I'll watch Alex." Embry and Jared nodded, apparently satisfied with the outcome, and hurried over to Bella, Embry shooting her a wink over Bella's shoulder as Jared helped her to her feet.

Alex waited until Jared and Embry had hustled Bella off towards her truck before she turned to Sam. He was waiting for her, frowning. "I'm okay! I don't need watching- hey!" Sam had stalked towards her, and picked her up like a sack of flour, tossing her over his shoulder like a misbehaving toddler. "Sam! This is kidnap!" Alex yelled as he made for the woods.

"Enough, Alex. I'll need you to help me bring in Jacob and Paul. I can't carry clothes and beat their asses." Sam said, stooping – still with her balanced perfectly – to pick up a bundle of fabric that he tucked under his other arm.

"You said a swear!" Alex jabbed him in the spine. "That's a dollar in the swear-jar, and I'm telling- ugh!" Sam tossed her again, flipping her once, and then setting her roughly on her feet – though keeping a hold of her shoulders to keep her steady. She swallowed at the stern look in his eyes. "Is it time for my lecture?" she guessed.

Sam sighed, and began to walk again, following some unknown trail towards what she assumed would be Paul and Jacob. Despite their size, they hadn't seemed to have caused too much damage to the forest, and Alex was hard pressed to see where they'd been, but a splintered log, and the occasional crushed bush let her know that Sam was on the right track. "The fact that I have to tell you off for fighting a wolf is insane. The fact that you just went and put yourself in-between _another_ wolf and his target is even more so."

"What was I supposed to do? Let Paul rip her head off?" Alex asked, as Sam leapt easily over a fallen tree that was blooming with moss and ferns from how long it had been fallen. She had begun to scale it when he reached for her, and she let him lift her over, legs dangling for an unnerving second before he set her down again. His face was unreadable. "Sam. You're not honestly telling me that I should have let her… y'know."

"Paul wouldn't have hurt her." Sam said. "He would have scared her."

Alex frowned, "And you're sure of that? I mean, I know Paul wouldn't _ever_ hurt someone deliberately, but he was _angry._ I think he and Kitty were fighting, and we both know when Paul's angry…" she trailed off. Sam was quiet, but she knew he was just thinking, turning things over in his head as he did.

"Alex, you have to understand that you have impact." He began, and she looked at him, at his serious face. He looked tired. "Imprinting doesn't just connect you to one of us. It's like Billy said – we're all connected. Loosing you would be like losing part of ourselves."

Alex shook her head. "I don't-"

"You might not understand." Sam interrupted her, "But I hope that you do one day. When I say that we would do anything to keep you safe, I mean anything. Imprints are sacred. By putting _yourself_ at risk, you are putting _us_ at risk."

Alex didn't doubt the gravity of Sam's statement, but she couldn't wrap her head around the concept. She was just… Alex. She was a small blip of existence, no more special than the grocery clerk down the road, no more valuable than the janitor at school. Whatever tied her to Jacob meant she was privileged enough to witness a magic that should have been impossible. It was a gift, and it was a curse, and Alex wasn't sure how to process the idea that she was a part of something bigger than herself.

She _knew_, that Imprints were precious – she saw it in the love shared between Sam and Emily, the friendship between her sister and Jared, the patience Paul had for Kim, the care Sam showed for Kitty – she knew it, because she had seen it. But to place herself in the complicated web of magic and love, the intricate bonds that had existed for years without her… it seemed a little self-centered.

Her and Jacob were supposed to be friends, and yet she couldn't even seem to maintain _that_ relationship; what right did she have to the title of 'Imprint'?

"Wait here." Sam said suddenly and handed her the bundle of clothing, and Alex did as he asked; straining her ears to listen for any signs of Jacob and Paul. She didn't hear anything, but a few minutes later, faint rustling of the undergrowth let her know that they were close.

Paul nosed through the bushes first, grey form circling Alex where she sat on a boulder once before he came to lie at her feet, looking distinctly sheepish. Sam and Jacob emerged from the trees next, and Alex noticed that Jacob was gaining on Sam in size, tall umber form broadening too, and she shivered a little.

Sam huffed at her, and she slid from the boulder to approach him, narrowly missing Paul's tail, which wagged once at her movement. She held out the shorts, and he huffed at her, turning and sinking lower. "Oh! Are you sure, Sam?" Alex had gone for a few runs with Paul, had even ridden on Embry – but never with their Alpha. Sam let out a short bark, and Alex clambered up onto his back.

He was larger than the others, and Alex found herself clinging tighter than she usually did, burying her fingers in his thick fur and holding tight as he moved, ducking her face into his neck as he picked up speed. When the woods around them began to look more familiar they slowed, and Alex slid from Sam's back. This time, the wolves did take the clothes from her, and she continued alone towards Emily's house as they left to Phase.

Paul re-joined her first, throwing an arm around her shoulders and bringing her into an awkward side-hug. "Hey, I'm sorry – I didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't scare me, asshole." Alex grunted into his armpit, trying to wiggle her way free. "You should probably apologize to Kitty for whatever you did though."

Paul let her go, shoving her lightly instead. "How do you know that _I_ did something?" He asked roughly, though there was no real anger in his mock scowl. Clearly, he had needed that little dust-up, needed to let out whatever anger he had been storing.

"Because it's _always_ you, and besides," Alex said, as the trees began to thin and Emily and Sam's house appeared through the trees. "My sister's an angel, and I meant what I said when you first took her out."

"Alright, Big A – whatever you say. Still. Sorry." Paul said, as Jacob and Sam emerged from the trees together. Jacob was still nodding at whatever Sam had been saying, and though he looked serious, when his eyes met hers, he looked – and at his expression, Alex felt a trill of surprise – happy to see her.

"Hey." She greeted, as he fell into step with her, Sam mounting the stairs ahead of them.

"Hi." He said. "I didn't realize you were coming by."

"Well, I wasn't going to originally. But good I did, right?" Alex said honestly, hoping his small smile wouldn't fade.

Jacob laughed. "Yeah lucky, though I'm sure I could have taken on the old man by myself." Paul turned and snapped his teeth at them.

"Yeah right, pup. You're lucky I was holding back." Paul said, reaching over Alex to try and swat Jacob on the back of the head. Alex ducked under the pair of them, shoving open the door with a laugh as Jacob yelped.

They ducked inside, Alex eyeing Bella, who was standing awkwardly against the far wall, Sam and Emily still locked in an embrace, Embry and Jared chewing furiously on their food. Her stomach grumbled, a reminder that she hadn't eaten yet, and her eyes fell on the plate of fresh muffins, and darted towards them. Paul was faster, and snagged the muffin she'd been eyeing, and then the seat she'd wanted. "Whore." She told him, and sat down resolutely on his lap, wrestling for the muffin.

"Hey! You know I'm reformed." Paul told her, holding the muffin out of reach with a wide smirk.

"Alex! Language!" Emily's exasperated voice made her grin, and she turned to the older woman.

"Sorry, Em." She said, and took a different muffin, standing from Paul's lap and biting into the muffin. He shot her a superior look around his own mouthful and she rolled her eyes.

Embry cleared his throat meaningfully, nudging Paul, who turned and gave Bella a once over. "Sorry." He said casually, and turned back to his food. Alex giggled a little at Bella's scandalized expression.

Jacob hadn't moved from the doorway, a nervousness overtaking his features as he looked at Bella, and Alex felt herself get irrationally angry. He'd been happy a few moments ago, was it too much to ask for him to keep his smile? He jerked his head towards the door, slipping out, and Alex watched as Bella followed him a moment later, pretending to busy herself with loading her plate as the other girl looked back.

She _wasn't_ jealous, she was just…

Nothing. She was nothing. She was _fine_.

Alex smiled again, trying to refocus her attention on the table as Jared cracked some crass joke. Embry met her eyes, and raised his eyebrows. She ignored his knowing gaze, engrossing herself in the conversation around her.

* * *

Jacob and Bella were gone for hours, and when they finally returned, night had fallen. Alex looked up as the door opened, curled around Embry – who despite saying he had wanted to watch the movie, had fallen asleep minutes after the opening credits – and met Jacob's eyes. Bella still looked out of place, looking around almost anxiously.

"Where is everyone?" Jacob asked, and Alex paused the movie.

"Sam went out with Emily to pick up pizza. Jared's getting Kim, and I think Paul and Kitty are having it out at his place." She winced. "I could hear her on the phone, she sounded mad."

"Shit." Jacob frowned. "What time will they be back? There's something we need to talk about."

At his words, Bella got even paler, and Alex frowned, sitting up as much as she could without letting Embry's head fall from her shoulder. "What's wrong?"

Jacob threw himself into the armchair across from them. "We know what the red-head wants. We know why she keeps coming back." It took Alex a moment to process his words, and when she did, she jolted in surprise.

Embry let out a groan and she stilled, pressing a careful hand to his cheek. "Whassgoin'on…" He slurred, sitting up. "'Lex?" Alex smiled a little sadly, getting the feeling that this was probably going to be the last proper rest Embry got for a while.

"Don't worry. Sam'll let you know when he gets home." She told him, giving Jacob a warning look as Embry settled back down. Jacob nodded, smiling slightly as Embry fell asleep again. "What's she after?"

"Me." Bella spoke up for the first time, drifting a little closer as they both turned to look at her. "Ed-" she stopped with an audible gulp, clearing her throat before she began again. "Her mate was killed by…the Cullens. She's after me for revenge. A mate for a mate."

Alex felt something dark and hot settle in her belly. "And you're still here, why?" she said, before she could stop herself.

"Alex!" Jacob said reproachfully. "Bella needs protection, it's not her fault."

Alex settled back into the sofa. "She's putting the Pack at risk by being here. Shouldn't this be a problem for the Cullens?"

Bella looked uncomfortable. "They won't respond to me…" Alex frowned. "My father's in danger. I can't- I can't lose him."

_She's asking the Pack to put their lives on the line for her and her father. Technically, for the Cullens, too – because it seems that it all comes back to them. Back to them, back to Bella and her blood-sucking boyfriend. Ex-boyfriend._

Alex held her tongue, watching as Jacob visibly melted, turning to reach for the pale girl. "It'll all be okay, Bells. I promise."

"Yeah?" Bella whispered, moving unsteadily towards Jacob. "You promise?"

Jacob's reply was muffled against her hair as he embraced her tightly. A sick feeling rose in Alex's throat and she turned away from the scene, pressing play on the movie, and trying to force herself to watch.


	27. Mine: Chapter 26

Alex hadn't slept, kept up by a growing sense of anxiety, and the debate raging at Emily's kitchen table. They'd all assembled there; all the Pack, all the Imprints – and when Jacob had gotten back from driving Bella home, the discussion had started.

Sam was with Jacob – his sense of responsibility to the people of La Push seemed to stretch to the inhabitants of Forks too, and he had also mentioned Bella's ties to the pack through Jacob, _and_ her father. Paul had seemed to be the only one standing in opposition to Jacob's proposition. At least – he had been the only one open about it. Jared had remained silent, though Kim had drawn closer to Paul and Kitty, a silent show of support. Emily had sat near Sam, a hand on his shoulder.

It had left Alex, Jared and Embry standing silently together, but when Jacob and Sam had looked to Embry and Jared, the two had separated; Embry to stand with Sam, Jared with Paul, a torn expression on his usually jovial face.

Of course, it wasn't a true debate. The Alpha had already made up his mind, and Alex knew that the shows of defiance from Paul and Jared were just that; shows. Alex couldn't blame them for their view – Bella was asking them to put themselves between her and a clearly bloodthirsty and relentless vampire, running the risk of leaving their home and hearts undefended.

When Sam had put his foot down, rising from his seat, Paul and Jared sighing in defeat – Kim and Kitty had turned to each other, making some kind of silent agreement between themselves. Whatever had happened between her sister and Paul had seemed to come to a tentative peace, and though Kitty had tensed when Paul had pressed a kiss to her forehead, she had still stood by him.

Her sister had beckoned her over to where she was standing with Kim and Emily. The men had moved outside to the porch, and even from here Alex could see Paul's scowl as he responded to whatever Sam was saying.

"We need to stay safe ourselves." Kitty had said, face tight.

"That means staying in one place for a while, staying together makes it easier to stay safe." Kim was matter of fact, no-nonsense, busy typing on her phone as she spoke. "I'm telling my mum I'm staying with Emily for a while."

"Are you sure?" Alex had asked Emily, who was looking drawn and white, a far cry from the solid support she'd displayed by Sam's side. Alex realised Emily wasn't in favour of the idea either, but had remained by Sam's side anyway. Instinctively, Alex had thrown her arms around the elder woman.

"I'm sure. I don't want to be alone." Emily had said in a whisper. The other two girls had drawn in closer at her words, and they stood in an awkward group huddle until Jared had ducked inside. He had looked a little guilty at interrupting, clearing his throat and announcing that they were headed out, and that they were all to stay inside until one of them returned.

And that had been that. The Pack had disappeared into the night, Emily had regained her surety, Kitty her pep, Kim her enthusiasm, and Alex was left almost dizzy at the abrupt change in mood as the other women moved around getting the house ready for the new guests they'd be having.

* * *

Alex had been given the small guest room to share with Kitty, and though her sister had fallen asleep quickly in the small bed they'd squashed themselves into, Alex had lingered awake until the first rays of the morning began to light up the wood panelling.

She sighed, and sat up.

She needed to call Quil, explain why she'd need to abandon their plans for the first week of Spring Break. They'd been planning to head up to Seattle on Tuesday, but it didn't look like she'd be let out of Emily and Kitty's sight.

_God, Quil was going to hate her. _

Alex slipped out of bed, wiggling her way out from Kitty's octopus embrace and tip-toed down the hallway. The house quiet, with no sign that any of the boys had returned, and Alex felt herself frown at the notion. They'd be so exhausted.

She was unsurprised to find Emily in the kitchen.

"Morning, Em."

Emily jumped, letting out a small squeak and whirling. "_Alex!_ Do _not_ scare me like that." Alex grinned at her, waltzing closer to look over Emily's shoulder. She was icing cupcakes, though Alex could note that Emily's usually steady hand had obviously wobbled and she frowned.

"Did you get any sleep?" She asked the older woman, moving back to properly look at Emily. Emily looked pale and drawn, and Alex frowned at the sight. "Emily…"

"I should be asking you the same question, Alex." Emily squinted at her.

"You saying I look like shit?" Alex asked, turning to pull out the bottle of orange juice from the fridge. She took a swig, ignoring Emily's pointed sigh. "Because I certainly feel like shit. And now I've got to go _be_ a shit and cancel on Quil."

Emily tutted. "Poor Quil. He's got to be close now, right?" She pursed her lips, looking concerned. "I hate to think of him all alone out there."

Alex shrugged. "I don't know. He seemed fine the last time I saw him." She didn't want to think about Quil being dragged into all this mess. "But you're right. It sucks. Big time." Alex took another long drink, and jumped up to perch atop the kitchen counter. Emily clicked her tongue disapprovingly at her, but didn't force her down, and Alex made sure to keep her legs out of the way as Emily bustled around the kitchen.

* * *

Kim and Kitty surfaced around the time Alex decided it was a reasonable hour to call Quil, and as the two women joined Emily's final breakfast prep, she headed over to Emily's house phone, and leant against the yellow wall, waiting for Quil to pick up.

"_Hello, Joy Ateara speaking_."

"Hey, Joy – it's Alex, is Quil at home?" Alex waited for Quil's mother's response, not disappointed at the jolly woman's happy laugh.

_"Oh, hello dear! I haven't heard from you in a while! I hear you and Quil have plans to head to Seattle this week!"_

Alex grimaced. "Well that's just it, Joy – I think I'm going to have to cancel. I've got relatives coming to town, and my family's making me stick around to see them."

_"That's too bad."_ Joy sounded genuinely disappointed. _"I know Quil was looking forward to it. he's become a regular shut-in recently, all grumpy and quiet. Well, I'll call him for you."_

"Wait – Joy, what do you mean grumpy?" Alex asked, but Joy was already yelling Quil's name faintly, unable to hear her. From the kitchen, Kim had turned and was looking at her a little suspiciously, and she smiled awkwardly, turning away a little.

_"Yo. 'Lex." _Quil's voice was deeper than she remembered, and she winced.

"Sup, dude. What's up?"

"_Not much, but I reckon I'm getting sick. Cannot wait for the holidays_." Quil bemoaned. Alex felt impossibly guilty as he sighed. _"I fucking broke my board yesterday too, so we're gonna need to pick a new one up before we go."_

"Shit man." Alex said, pressing her head a little harder into the wall. "I wish I didn't have to do this but-"

_"Oh no."_ Quil's voice wavered and Alex could just picture his distraught expression. "_Please, please don't tell me you're flaking on me. My dad's driving me fucking crazy! Keeps talking about some bullshit; upcoming responsibility and doing what's right – I just want to get out of here."_

Alex knew she had to cancel, knew she had to do the right thing – stay away from Quil for his own safety – but she didn't want to abandon him again. She turned further away from the women in the kitchen, lowering her voice so they couldn't hear. "Quil, I'm sorry – I can't make Seattle, but I promise I'll come to see you this week. I'm on lockdown at home, my family's here – but I'll come, okay." Quil was silent. "Quil, I'm sorry. We'll do Seattle, I promise – but just not this week." _And not until that blood-sucking bitch was caught._

_"Yeah. Right." _Quil said shortly. _"I'll see you round, Alex."_ He hung up, and Alex groaned, slamming the phone back into its cradle with a little more force than necessary.

"Is everything okay?" Kitty was looking at her curiously and Alex nodded, forcing a smile onto her face.

"Peachy keen." She responded. Her sister looked unconvinced but didn't press the issue, beckoning her to the table instead.

Kim sighed, checking her watch over her bowl of muesli. "Shit, I'm going to be late."

Alex frowned. "You're still going to work?"

Kitty nodded. "We both are. As long as we stay together at night, we should be fine." She sighed, rubbing a hand over her face. "As much as Paul wants to deny it, I can't afford to just stop working."

Emily raised an eyebrow, "How did that talk with him go?"

Alex looked between the two women, feeling a little left out, and when Kitty cleared her throat, looking a little guilty, she realised she had probably not been included on purpose. "It was fine. Let's talk about it later." Kitty said, pulling an unconvincing smile onto her face.

Alex set down her knife and fork. "I'm going out."

"Stay close to the house, okay?" Emily said.

"But Kim and Kitty are going to work!" Alex jabbed a finger accusingly at the two women sitting at the table still. Kim blinked at her over the rim of her mug, looking distinctly unimpressed and Kitty just looked guilty again. Emily remained unmoved, slowly crossing her arms in a movement reminiscent of Sam. "Ugh! Fine, whatever."

She left without saying goodbye, jogging down the porch steps, tugging on her jacket as she went, heading for the beach. It wasn't too cold, and when she hit the sand, she paused to toe off her shoes, tucking them and her jacket in the fork of an old weather-beaten tree, made smooth by the ocean air.

Alex made a beeline for the water.

She sat – flopped, really – onto the damp sand close to the waves, and stretched out her legs, feet just in reach of the gentle surf lapping at the shore. The water was freezing where the air was not, and she shivered a little at the uncomfortable sensation, casting her gaze out to sea.

And she breathed.

The bruise on her back still ached a little – yet it felt as if the explosive fight between her and Jacob had happened weeks ago, rather than days – and she wondered if their tentative peace would last. Of course, she couldn't quite tell – given that he'd been occupied with Bella whenever they were in the same room.

Bella. Isabella Swan.

Alex turned her name over in her mouth, said it aloud twice, and wondered. Was it cruel of her to wonder what drew them to her? Jacob, Edwin – Edward, whatever his name was – even the boys that had been sat around the beach fire that day. She was pretty, Alex could see it, pretty in a delicate way.

Maybe that was it. Perhaps the appeal of something to treasure, to protect, drew them in like flies to honey. Alex snorted at herself. "Poetic." She said to the water. "This is pathetic." It was. Dissecting the affections of others was hardly something a sane person did. "I don't even care."

_A lie._

Yes, she did care. She cared what happened to the others, and if Bella was the reason – well.

And maybe, just _maybe_, she cared a little that Jacob had leapt so readily back into friendship with this girl, had readily offered the rest of the Pack as protection, as collateral. Alex couldn't help the uneasy unfurling of something a lot like dislike in her gut as she thought more about the other girl.

It wouldn't do anyone any good to spark an issue. Besides, Bella had always been… _nice_. Alex grimaced. _Pleasant_.

"_Alexandra_!"

Alex turned, brow creasing. It was as if she'd managed to summon the very person she'd been thinking about. Bella was coming down the beach towards her, hands balled into her sweater's pockets, head bowed a little as if it was windy. "Speak of the devil." Alex muttered, and got to her feet as Bella began to head down towards the water. Absently, she brushed down the back of her jeans, getting rid of as much sand as she could. "Hey, Bella. What, um, what are you doing here?" Alex tried to sound pleasant, even smiling at the shorter girl.

Bella smiled slightly. "Jake thought it would be best if I stayed in La Push. He thought it would be safer."

"Did he?" Alex muttered. _Safer for who, exactly?_ She did her best to keep the smile on her face. "Well, he's probably right. Safety in numbers and all that."

"I suppose so." Bella said, and then was promptly silent. Alex swayed slightly on her feet, waiting for the girl to keep the conversation going. After a long moment, it became clear that that was all Bella had to say.

Bella looked lost, eyes darting between the sand, surf and Alex's face, almost as if she didn't want to make eye contact. Alex sighed. "Did you wanna walk up to the rocks with me? There's some cool rockpools up there. Maybe some crabs."

Bella's nose wrinkled a little. "Crabs? They freak me out."

Alex nodded. "I can see that. I think they're pretty cute though, with their little," she brought her thumb and fingers together in an approximation of crab claws clicking together, waddling a few steps sideways in a crab-walk.

"Yes, I suppose so." Bella said again, and Alex nearly passed out from resisting the urge to roll her eyes. Bella looked around Alex, squinting into the distance. "Which way are they?"

"A ten-minute walk that way." Alex nodded towards the coast in front of them. Bella nodded, and fell into step beside her.

Ten minutes turned into twenty – Alex had forgotten to factor in Bella's short legs and incredible lack of coordination. If Bella had laughed too, then maybe it wouldn't have been so annoying but when Bella had stumbled over nothing and nearly faceplanted to Alex's peals of laughter the first time, without reaction, or a shared smile, Alex had realised they were in for a long walk.

Alex slowed her pace deliberately as they neared the beginning of the rock formations, where rocks really were hiding beneath the sands, ready to trip up unsuspecting beach dwellers. Alex had lost two toenails to these particular rocks and called to Bella. "Just watch your step here, there's heaps of rocks under the sand."

"Sure, I'll keep an eye-out." Bella said, with a small smile – and then tripped over a hidden stone. She went down completely this time, hands coming up to stop her face hitting the sand. Alex bit down hard on the inside of her cheeks to stop herself laughing, hurrying towards the fallen girl.

"Shit, are you alright?" She crouched beside Bella, offering the elder her hand. Bella took it, and Alex hauled her to her feet. Bella was pink in the cheeks and had sand all up her front.

"I'm fine." She said, ducking her gaze, and hurriedly brushing at her clothes. "I can't stand getting sand in my clothes, I don't know how you do it. It feels so gross and dirty." Alex looked down at her own sandy pants, and surreptitiously ran her hands over the denim to dislodge as much as she could. "Are we nearly there?" Bella asked, voice taking on a suspiciously whiny tone. "I thought you said ten minutes."

"I did." Alex said, huffing a little. "We're here." She gestured at the lower pools. There was no way she was going to attempt to help Bella climb up the rocks to where the best pools were. _Poor thing_. Alex wondered what she would do if she was unable to ride a skateboard, or surf, or like, walk in a straight line without incident. "Follow me." Alex led the way this time, taking care to pick through the sand and avoid rocks. Thankfully, they made it to the edge of one of the largest pools without incident, and as Bella took a seat gingerly on the edge, Alex jumped up to walk around the rim, squatting over the edge with her back to the sea. She could feel the faintest spray of sea foam in her position, and tugged her shirt down from where it was riding up over her back.

The rock-pool was deeper than it looked, and Alex felt the urge to shove her head down into the clear water to see what was hiding. Seaweed, tiny micro-organisms, sand, shells – a whole miniaturized eco system, changed every day by the lowering and raising of the tide.

"A fish!" Alex cried a little loudly, catching a glimpse of a small silver and yellow creature swimming frantically to hide behind another clump of seaweed. "I wonder what type."

"I don't really know much about ocean life." Bella said, and when Alex looked at her, she saw that the other girl – though clearly leaning _away_ from the pool, was at least making an effort to join her in her enthusiasm. Alex smiled.

"That's alright, me either. I'll look it up when we get back. I'm just surprised – I only ever see crabs and anemones in these pools." Alex peered a little closer. "He must be lost."

"Lost and alone." Bella said, with unusual gravity, and Alex watched as her features took on a far away expression, arms coming up almost unconsciously to tighten around her middle. "I know how that feels."

Alex wanted to laugh again, but held her tongue. She shouldn't laugh – even if it felt a little over-dramatic. What did she know about losing love? Nothing. She could hardly imagine what it felt like – but clearly the breakup had hurt Bella in an irreversible way, despite Jacob's obvious hopes to the contrary. She wondered if Bella knew how Jacob felt about her. "I'm sorry." She told the other girl. "I don't know what it's like, but it must suck."

"Suck." Bella echoed, a touch of disbelief on her face. "Sure, that's one way to put it." she sounded almost offended, and Alex wondered what she had said to upset the other girl. They fell back into an uncomfortable silence.

Alex didn't really feel like looking for crabs anymore, whatever dark mood Bella had found herself in making her feel guilty for even trying to enjoy her day. If it wasn't _for_ Bella, she wouldn't have been trapped here.

"Bella! Bells! Oh – Alex."

Both of them had looked up at the call of Bella's name, Alex easily recognizing Jacob's large form loping towards them. The flame in her chest ignited with a sudden and fierce passion, and she physically twitched, nearly losing her balance on the edge of the pool. Bella stood, moving towards Jacob with surprising speed considering her pace earlier.

He wrapped her in a hug, her stumbling – she supposed, _endearingly_ – into his chest, and she looked away as nausea rose in her throat.

_Stop. Just stop._

She wished her body would respond to her rational mind, and hopped backwards off the pool, landing in the water and splashing water up her calves. She sloshed to shore, as Jacob separated from Bella and looked at her. "You guys were hanging out."

"That's one way to put it." Alex said a little meanly, echoing Bella's dismissive words. Bella looked a little caught out, and ducked her head.

Jacob frowned at her. "Well that's… nice." Then he turned to Bella, and it was if she had ceased to exist, as he leant closer to touch Bella's hand. "I'm sorry I haven't been around as much. If I could-"

"It's okay, Jake, I know you have a lot on your plate. I feel safer just knowing you're out there. It's okay." Bella said softly, and Alex set her sights on the higher rock pools.

Despite her resolution to ignore the sheer turmoil – artificial though it was – that their Imprint connection was going through as Jacob interacted with Bella, Alex couldn't deny that turning her mind to other things, turning her mind away from the love-sickening scene in front of her helped a little. She grasped the rough rocks, and hauled herself up bodily, paying no mind to the rough scrape against her knees and shins as she scrabbled for a foot hold. When she had gathered herself atop the rocks, Jacob and Bella had separated slightly, Bella leaning into him. She was reminded briefly of sunflowers – the way they turned towards the sun.

"You right there?" Jacob sounded amused, and the way his eyes sparkled suddenly reminded Alex of his easy smile. Before all this.

She grinned at him. All teeth, no joy. He didn't seem to notice the difference. "I'll stick around here for a while. You guys go ahead and…hang." She finished lamely.

Jacob nodded, Bella looking a little relieved at the easy dismissal. Alex pretended she wasn't rankled. "Alright, Alex. I'll see you later?"

Alex shrugged. "I guess. I am on house arrest after all." It wasn't meant as a direct insult but Bella looked a little sheepish anyway. _Good_. Alex thought vindictively. At least she knows.

Jacob perked up. "Oh! See any crabs?"

Alex smiled for real now, shaking her head ruefully. "Unfortunately not. No snappy-babies."

Jacob raised his hands, doing an exact replica of her crab imitation earlier, albeit mournfully. "Sad. It's probably too early in the season."

"Probably." Alex said, and was about to tell him she'd keep an eye out, when Bella's hand snaked into Jacob's left.

"Jakey, can we head back? I'm freezing." Alex wasn't sure if Bella had shivered deliberately, or if it had just been perfect timing – but Jacob was distracted anyway – a faintly besotted look overtaking his face as he steered her away. They left without a goodbye, and Alex stared after them until she realised she was staring, blinking rapidly and turning her head away.

_It wasn't her business. She didn't care. **She didn't care.**_

* * *

Bella Swan became a constant in La Push.

Alex woke the next morning, hoping to descend on her breakfast and make for the beach again, but found Bella sitting at the kitchen table, drinking orange juice that Alex _knew _she'd staked her claim on, and chatting happily to Emily.

Alex mulishly took a seat across from Bella, next to Emily, and helped herself to the pile of bacon. "Morning."

"Good morning, chicken." Emily greeted.

"Morning, Alexandra." Bella said causally, before re-engaging Emily in whatever they had been talking about before Alex had arrived. Kitty and Kim were long gone; Kim's job at the Fork's bookstore, and Kitty's position at the kindergarten in town requiring them both to be gone before nine – and Alex had gotten out of bed at eleven. As Emily stood, collecting both her and Bella's plates, Alex had a sudden stomach dropping realisation that she was going to be alone. And not just for the day.

When Emily and Bella headed outside, bound for Emily's lovingly tended vegetable patch, Alex felt a distinct wave of displacement, a strange nauseous mix of loneliness and frustration. She stood, her movement jostling the table, and looked to the woods. She was longing, longing for something inexplicable, and it only took a moment of deliberation before she was on the move again.

Alex skipped Emily's front steps with her usual jump and skip, heading towards the trees, pulled by a feeling she couldn't explain. She ducked beneath the canopy with a distinct feeling of relief, and walked onwards.

And then she wasn't alone anymore.


	28. Mine: Chapter 27

Alex whirled around, eyes going wide as she searched the trees for what could have disturbed the sense of peace she'd found. She half-expected to come face to face with the blood-sucker that had been terrorizing them, and her heart leapt into her throat as there was movement in the trees opposite her.

Then Jacob stepped into view, and Alex gasped, the scream that had been building in her throat dying abruptly.

"Alex – what's wrong?" He asked, frowning at her.

Alex made an embarrassing gurgling sound. "You just scared the _shit_ out of me! That's what's wrong!" she shook her fist at him, as if momentarily possessed by the spirit of a 90-year-old man.

Jacob's frown deepened. "That's not what- you were… distressed." He said, a little uneasily. Alex squinted at him, confused. "I thought you, um, _needed_ me, or something."

Alex did not think she had been part of a more uncomfortable conversation. "Um. What?"

Jacob sighed, and tapped his chest. "I could feel you, like you were – I mean – ah, never mind." He dropped his hand, brow creasing momentarily. "You're clearly fine, I'm sorry I – I mean, you _are_ fine, right?"

Alex blinked at him. "Ummm… yes. I am?" it came out as a question, and she realised that no – she probably hadn't been 100% _okay_ before Jacob had arrived. She had been lonely, lonely enough to alert Jacob – and she wasn't sure how that made her feel. Because now she felt- well, she felt fine. Honestly, she felt a little touched – because he hadn't _needed_ to come check up on her, but he had anyway. "I'm good." She said honestly, trying not to smile too much like a maniac, as the heat in her chest seemed to multiply and expand with warmth through her body. _God, she was such a freak._ It wasn't as though he'd _proposed_ or something, he'd just come to check up on her – and now she thought about it – he had probably been on his way to see Bella anyway.

"Is Bella here?" Jacob asked, on cue. Alex felt her smile fade a little.

"Yeah, she and Emily are doing something. Probably in the garden." She said, jerking her head in the right direction, and turning to leave. "I'll catch you later."

Jacob took a hurried step towards her, and she jumped at his sudden approach. "Whoa, wait! I wasn't- I mean, it's good she's with Emily. I won't disturb her." Jacob looked pleased with something, and Alex narrowed her eyes at him. Jacob was the master of _smug_, and his expression only triggered alarm bells.

"Why not? Don't you want to hang out with your girlfriend?" Alex asked a little snidely.

Jacob coloured, cheeks darkening under his tan, "Hah – very funny." He said, but didn't deny the accusation, and Alex felt that odd wave of nausea again. "No that's not it. I do – but I think it's good she's hanging out with Emily. She needs girl-friends, and I'm just happy that the Pack's accepting her." Jacob said, smiling broadly. Alex resisted the urge to raise an eyebrow, as Jacob grew serious. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about too. I just wanted to say I really appreciated you making an effort with Bella the other day, I'm sure it meant heaps to her as well, an it would be cool if you could… y'know…" he looked hopeful, puppy-dog eyes in full effect.

"Are you asking me to hang out with Bella?" Alex deadpanned, ignoring his flutter of his eyelashes. "What are you, her mother?"

Jacob sighed. "No, I just… I worry about her. I hate leaving her alone, without anyone." He sounded disappointed, and Alex ground her teeth. "She's shy, Alex, but I promise you she's so loyal, and kind, and funny," Alex held back a laugh, "And I just know the pair of you would get on well if you tried." He hung his head, and through their damned connection, Alex could sense his pining – so intense that it made her mouth dry up. He cared about Bella, more than – well, more than anything else, it seemed.

_Love. He loved her._

A little voice whispered in her ear, and she twitched, physically recoiling from the idea. "Fine." She heard herself say, unable to stand his defeated expression and his nameless longing. "Yes, I'll be Bella's friend. I'm sorry if-" she swallowed, "If I've been…mean to her, or something."

Jacob lit up. His smile was sunshine, and his eyes sparkled enough to put the stars out of their shine, and Alex had to look away as her chest swelled with his excitement, tamping down on her own emotional confusion. _She wasn't jealous. _

"Thanks, Alex, seriously – you're the best." He reached for her, and Alex only had a second to register sheer alarm before his arms were around her and she was squashed against his chest.

It was as if she had been set on fire.

She felt like she was burning; everywhere they touched alight in nameless desire that made her toes curl in her sneakers and she had to bite down on her tongue to stop herself from making a noise. _She ached to be so close, but to be so far. She wanted him to hold her tighter, to press herself wholly against him, to feel his skin against hers, she wanted-_

It was Alex that broke the embrace, struggling against his grip, shoving at his chest as she gasped for air, suddenly feeling lightheaded as she stumbled back from him. She wasn't the only one effected; Jacob was panting too, eyes wide and fists clenched at his side. "What was that?" he asked breathlessly, a little suspiciously.

Her heart was beating a frantic rhythm in her chest, and she pressed a hand to her sternum. "Nothing." She bit out, willing the feeling to go away. If Jacob could beat his wolf into submission, then she could beat this emotion. Jacob was still looking at her accusingly and she clung to the anger it made her feel, forcing herself to smile. "Sorry. It's nothing. Sorry." She pressed harder against her chest, until it hurt, until her heart rate began to slow. "Sorry." She said again, and watched as he visibly calmed.

"You're such a weirdo." He said, almost fondly, and Alex's throat tightened. "Anyway, thanks again. I'm gonna go see Bella. Make sure you stay near the house." He waved, a cursory goodbye, and jogged out of sight. Alex counted to thirty before she let herself relax.

She should have just gone to the beach, but she wasn't ready to see Bella and Jacob there, walking together as they often did. So, instead, she followed the path that Jacob had taken, walking as slow as she could. Thankfully, when she reached the waist high wicker gate, and the garden beyond, there was only one figure pottering around the flowerbeds.

Emily straightened as Alex made her way towards her. She had her basket cradled protectively in the crook of her elbows, already overflowing with carrots and tomatoes, and she was inspecting the zucchinis on the vine with seriousness. It was the gentle smile that bloomed across her face that did Alex in.

The tears that had been building in her eyes fell heavily, and she only managed a single shuddering breath before she began to cry in earnest.

Emily gasped, the basket falling to the ground as she lurched towards Alex, as if Alex might break if she didn't get to her in time. Alex thought she might. She sobbed into Emily's shoulder as the shorter woman wrapped her in a tight embrace. "Oh, baby-bird, what's happened?" Emily cooed into her ear, bringing a hand up to smooth Alex's hair.

"It sucks." Alex managed, sucking in harsh breaths of air, and trying to get herself under control.

"What does, Alex? Tell me, baby…" Emily let her go to touch her face instead, holding her cheeks gently, and forcing Alex to make eye contact. "I want to make it better." She looked so worried, so genuinely distressed by Alex's emotion that Alex just cried harder, sobbing like she was a child again. "Alex!"

"S-sorry!" Alex wailed, and tried to stop crying. "It's just…" she sniffed, wetly, making Emily wrinkle her nose, "it's harder than I thought it would be." She coughed and rubbed at her eyes. Emily let her face go, in favour of rubbing her shoulders, waiting patiently for Alex to get herself under control.

When Alex was mostly put-together, a few stubborn droplets still leaking from the corner of her eyes, but no longer wracked with tears, Emily stooped to pick up her abandoned basket. "Come on. I'll make you a hot chocolate and you can tell me what's wrong."

Alex nodded weakly, and let Emily manhandle her all the way back to the house and onto the couch. It was easy, Alex thought, to let Emily take care of her, to give into the mothering she gave. Emily cared so much; Alex wondered how she had anything left for herself. She took a sip of the warm drink Emily had pressed into her hand, and watched the woman put the vegetables in the fridge before she turned to her.

"So," Emily said, almost threateningly. "What happened?"

Now, in the sobering warmth of the house, the heightened emotions she had let overwhelm her just felt stupid, and Alex felt her cheeks grow warm. "it's stupid."

"Maybe it seems stupid now, but it seemed serious to me." Emily frowned, and reached out to tuck some of her fly-away hair behind her ear. Alex shifted uncomfortably at the gesture, self-consciously running her fingers through her tangled and messy hair. _Bella's hair was always so pretty…_

The throw-away thought just made her scowl, and she dropped her hand. "It's this whole…_thing_." She said, gesturing wildly with her mug. Some hot chocolate slopped over the side and splashed onto her jeans. Emily just hummed, nodding at her to continue. "It's unfair, and I _know_ it's not right for me to say it, or think it, but I just feel like we shouldn't be putting _our_ lives on the line for something that isn't _about_ us." It came out in an angry rush, louder and far more aggressively than she had intended, but Emily didn't even flinch. "And Jacob doesn't seem to see it, and it's like he's just happy for the excuse to integrate _her_, like he's just happy _she_ needs him, even though her little bunch of bloodsuckers-" Alex clamped her mouth shut, setting down her mug with a loud crack on the table, as anger rose like a flare of heat within her. She followed Emily's wide-eyed gaze to her shaky hands, and balled them into her hoodie's pocket, forcing a tight smile onto her face.

Emily sat back slightly, face thoughtful. "So, this is about Bella." She tilted her head, eyes narrowing. "Are you jealous of her and Jacob?"

Alex threw her head back and laughed. Emily waited, and Alex stopped abruptly at the serious expression on the elder woman's face. "Wait, what? You're serious?"

"Alex, the Imprint is _very_ serious." Emily bit at her lip, shaking her head. "If Jacob's been neglecting you, I can speak to Sam-"

"No!" Alex yelped, jolting stiffly upright. "Fuck – no, Emily! Do _not-_ he's not _neglecting_ me, Jesus, its not like _that." _Alex scowled. "You're telling me you're really not bothered about everything?"

Emily sighed, looking to the ceiling briefly, as if praying for patience. "Of course, I'm _bothered_, it's my fiancée out there."

Alex blanched. "That's not what I meant, Emily. Sorry." She shook her head. "Just- never mind."

Emily waved her off, looking a little pained. "I know, honey." She sighed again. "You need to talk to Jacob if he's making you unhappy."

Unbidden, Jacob's brilliant smile came to mind, and she swallowed thickly. "I think- I mean… I think maybe _I'm_ the one making him unhappy…" she said quietly. "Bella means so much to him, Emily." She met the other woman's gaze, trying to smile. "And I haven't been the nicest to her, and I think it's hurting him."

Emily's eyes widened, and she scooted closer to Alex, and pulled her into her chest. Alex realised too late that tears had been building in her eyes again, and she pressed her face into Emily's sweater to hide them. "Oh, Alex, you mean so much to him too. You guys are best friends." Emily held her tight.

Alex squeezed her eyes shut. They _had_ been best friends, but she wasn't so sure about that anymore. "I miss him." She admitted quietly, hating the way it came out small and wounded. "It's been ruined by this Imprint shit, and I just want him back." Emily didn't speak, but held her tighter, rocking her slowly back and forth and Alex folded in on herself, trying to be smaller, trying to disappear into the embrace.

* * *

It was voices in the kitchen that woke her, and at first she thought she'd slept through breakfast, which was enough to rouse her further. A quick glance at the clock, however, told her it was something far more serious.

It was still dark outside, the clock reading a little past four in the morning, and yet Alex could hear people moving around the house, and Sam's deep voice. Alex wriggled her way out of bed, careful not to disturb her sister, who was curled in on herself, frowning in her sleep. She hadn't seen Sam in a few days; he'd been out near constantly, though apparently he stopped in occasionally during the day to eat. The fact that he was here now, though, told her something was going on.

She tip-toed down the hall – though Sam would hear her, she didn't want to disturb Kim – and stuck her head into the living room. Sam turned immediately at her entrance, serious and shirtless, his cut-offs not even buttoned up, clearly ready to go. Emily had stopped speaking, meeting her eyes with a frightened expression and Alex frowned.

"What's going on?" she whispered.

Emily shook her head. "Go back to sleep, Alex."

It was Jacob, appearing from the kitchen, that gave her the answers she wanted. He looked just as serious as Sam, and Alex's heart lurched, and for once it wasn't because of the flame in her chest. "Embry and Jared crossed a fresh trail."

"Jacob." Sam snapped, face like thunder.

Alex's stomach flipped, sudden anxiety making her breath short. "Fuck. Are they-?"

Sam stepped in front of her, severing her eye contact with Jacob. "Alex, you need to keep calm. Paul's with them now, and I'm confident we can end this. They've got her cornered in the mountains." This close, Alex could see the exhaustion on his face. It didn't ease her growing panic at all.

"What if-?"

Sam cut her off again, hands settling on her shoulders, and the weighty sensation of his gaze made her snap her mouth shut. This time, his voice was all Alpha and she shuddered under it. "We _will_ end this. I want you to stay here and look after the others. Can you do that?"

It was just a testament of how much he knew her, that he was giving her something to do, something that would slightly lessen the worry. If she was occupied, then maybe she wouldn't _completely freak out-_

Sam had let her go to move to Emily, who looked just as shaky as Alex felt. He held her tenderly, and kissed her so deeply that Alex looked away, meeting Jacob's eyes again. Now, without Sam's attention, she could see the slight fear in his eyes. It made her lurch towards him, and tremulous, he met her halfway.

She clung to him desperately, fingers digging into his bare back, hoping he could feel her worry, her hope, her offered strength. "Promise me-" she began, hushed and desperate against his chest.

His arms were like brands around her, and the way he was holding her was almost painful, but she didn't care. "I promise." He said, just as fiercely. "I'll see you soon, okay?"

"Jacob. We have to go." Sam was at the door, and Emily was holding a hand over her mouth. Jacob let her go, and Alex had to watch them both disappear into the night. This time, _she_ held Emily, and pretended she didn't see the tears glistening in the elder woman's eyes. Maybe it shouldn't have been a big deal, because they'd killed a vampire before, but something about this felt dangerous, and Alex felt dread settle into her stomach like a physical weight.

She wasn't particularly superstitious, nor did she believe in premonitions, but she couldn't deny the looming sensation that something was about to happen.

She could only hope her pack was safe.


	29. Mine: Chapter 28

"It's going to storm today."

Her sister's voice broke the thick silence that was settled over the house. Kim hummed noncommittally from her stance by the door. She'd been standing there since she'd found out where the pack had gone, eyes on the forest. Where Kim was turned to stone by her worry, Emily had dissolved into raw fretting, unable to keep still. The air was sweetened by the constant stream of cakes and muffins that she'd been producing. Kitty, on the other hand, seemed to be a little in shock. Her sister had been occupying herself with a magazine, a half-finished puzzle, and the television on mute.

Emily didn't reply, whisking the meringue in her bowl a little more aggressively. Alex looked out of the window, and true to her sister's words, there was a gathering of grey clouds on the horizon. As she watched, a wind ruffled the trees around the house hard enough to dispel leaves into the air.

Suddenly, the prospect of lingering even another second in the house felt like a death sentence, and she stood from the kitchen table. "I'm going out."

Kitty straightened on the couch, eyes going wide. "What? No, you have to stay here."

"No, I don't." Alex snapped, hating herself as her sister recoiled. Emily set down her whisk with a clatter, and turned to face her. Alex held her ground as Emily stared her down. "I'll be back before dark." _Or when we get word._ It was unspoken. "I can't just sit here." Her voice broke, and she clenched her jaw in frustration.

Emily didn't say a word, but she nodded once and it was enough. Alex turned, heading for the door, trying to avoid Kitty's furious look. Kim stepped aside wordlessly, and Alex tried to smile at the girl who had gone very pale. Kim's answering grimace was painful.

She jogged down the steps, making a beeline for the trees. Blindly, she turned east and started moving, and before she knew it, she was running, helter-skelter through the trees, desperate to escape the worry chasing her.

The incline got steeper, and the dotting of sand she could see to her left began to get sparser as she headed towards the cliffs. Maybe up high, she'd get a breath of air and a chance to clear her head. Because she was being _stupid_. They could do this. They could kill a vampire. They were strong. They were capable. She shouldn't worry; Sam had said they could do it. Jared was experienced. Paul was strong. Embry was fast and smarter than all of them. Jacob had promised he'd come back. _He promised…_

Distracted as she was, it took her far too long to register the familiar vehicle parked at the end of the main trail. Alex jerked to a halt, turning on her heel to eye the beaten up red truck parked perilously half off the gravel onto the dirt. _Why was Bella here?_ There was no sign of the girl in the surrounding trees, and dread settled low in her gut as her eyes fell upon the well-worn path that led out of the trees up onto the stone cliff.

_"I worry about her. I hate leaving her alone, without anyone…"_

Jacob's words came to her in a flash, and a sickening realisation came to her. _Bella wasn't- Bella wouldn't-_

Maybe she _would_.

Nausea making her stomach flip, she broke into a run. _Maybe she would, maybe she thought it was the answer, maybe her boyfriend leaving her had really broken her- _Alex didn't know what Jacob would do if Bella killed-

She couldn't even finish the thought, picking up speed as the path levelled out, and she spotted a silhouette on the edge of the cliff. Out in the open, the wind had picked up, and Alex could see the other girl's hair and clothing being whipped around. There was static in the air, and in the distance, Alex caught a faint flicker of lightning. _Jesus._

"BELLA!" Alex screamed at the girl. Bella startled visibly, jumping and spinning awkwardly. Her mouth dropped open in a wide 'o' of surprise. "What are you doing?" Alex skidded to a halt in front of the girl. Bella blinked at her, looking a little caught out, brown eyes impossibly wide.

"Cliff diving… what are you doing here?" Bella asked, and Alex had to strain to hear her soft voice over the wind. Bella looked frailer than usual, and though her explanation _seemed_ innocent enough, but Alex didn't buy it.

"I was out for a walk. Bella, I want you to step away from the edge." She said, as gently as she could, though worry made her voice come out hard, and Bella frowned.

"Why? And where's Jacob – he was supposed to take me cliff-diving today." Bella didn't move, and Alex gave her feet – far too close to the edge of the cliff for comfort – a nervous look.

Jacob would _not_ have taken her cliff diving today – even if the bloodsucker hadn't holed herself up – the weather was terrible, and storm-driven currents made the ocean dangerous, even deadly. Alex shook her head. "Bella, I'm serious. Just come back with me. Jacob and the others are hunting down Victoria, they've cornered her in the mountains-"

"What?" Bella seemed to grow even paler, fright making her face taunt. She looked like a mannequin. The wind whipped around them, tugging at them and Alex planted her feet a little more firmly. "No – Victoria doesn't just get _cornered_, it's got to be a trap, it has to be-" As if in slow-motion, Bella stumbled back slightly, caught off balance by a strong gust of wind as she gestured emphatically. Her arms pinwheeled briefly, and Alex reached for her as she screamed, teetering over the edge of the cliff- And then she was gone, her scream just audible over the crash of the waves and a low roll of distant thunder.

Alex panted, and for a moment, one sickening moment, she was still.

And then the memory of Jacob's deep and burning adoration for Bella went running through her like lightning, all cautionary thoughts flying from her mind, and Alex threw herself off the cliff after the other girl.

* * *

She would have screamed if the air had not been snatched from her lungs by the speed of her descent. Alex only had a moment to register the foamy patch where Bella must have landed before she hit the water with a splashing smack.

The ocean was ice-cold and the distance she sunk was enough to make her panic for a moment, instinct sending her surging for the surface. She gasped in a lungful of air, the sensation clearing her head enough for her to think, and she watched as Bella's head broke the surface a few feet away.

"Bella!" she cried, and began to swim towards the other girl, eyes on the growing wave coming towards them. Bella seemed unaware of it, busy trying to push her wet hair out of her face, and Alex watched hopelessly as the wave hit Bella head on. She took another breath of air, and dived beneath the water just as the wave passed over her. Forcing herself to open her eyes, though in the murky, disturbed water, it was hard to make out anything. She could see Bella's struggling form however, carried closer to her by the strong current. Alex powered towards her, arms already beginning to burn fighting the current trying to carry them both away.

Her lungs began to burn for air by the time she reached the other girl, and when she closed her arms around Bella's torso, the other girl lashed out wildly, and her elbow caught Alex's chest, forcing out a huge bubble of air. Alex abandoned decorum, reaching out to grab a handful of Bella's hair and pulling at it as she kicked both of their way to the surface.

The momentary peace of being submerged was broken almost immediately. Bella took a loud gulping breath of air when they broke the surface, but before Alex could speak to the other girl, another wave crashed upon them, and it was all she could do to keep a hold of Bella as the water crushed down upon them.

They were getting too close to the rocks, and panic was beginning to overtake her, rationality falling away as she realised, she couldn't keep them both afloat and away from the rocks. For the first time in a long time, Alex realised she couldn't save herself. The all-consuming terror that engulfed her made her scream, briefly and loudly the next time her head broke the surface, and she was still screaming as the next wave fell upon them. Bella was clawing at her, and Alex wasn't sure if she was trying to keep a hold of her or trying to use her to get to the surface too.

She was getting tired, the initial adrenaline rush that had powered her over the edge of the cliff and had kept them afloat fading quickly, muscles burning with the effort of holding Bella up, and fighting the current.

In the brief interlude between waves, she grasped Bella, who had dissolved into hyperventilation. "Listen to me! We need to get away from the cliff. The next wave, I want you to duck under it and swim as hard as you can, okay?" Bella seemed unable to hear her, and Alex dug her fingernails into Bella's skin, making the other girl whimper. "Okay?" Alex barked, eyes on the waves approaching them from behind.

Bella nodded briefly, and Alex maneuvered the girl around so she could see. For a moment, things seemed to work, the first wave, Bella and Alex moved in tandem, taking a breath and swimming hard into the current.

But then it went to shit.

Bella, a few inches ahead of her, suddenly startled, and even in the water, Alex could hear the tinny sound of her scream, as Bella rapidly began to backpedal. The next wave caught Bella fully, and Alex didn't have time to draw breath before Bella's body crashed into her own, and the force of the wave, the current, and the other girl's body slammed her hard into the rocks behind them.

The sudden collision made sparks pop in her vision, and her limbs went limp as blackness wavered on the edge of her vision. This time, it was Bella struggling to hold her, the other girl's face white with panic as she attempted to draw them to the surface. The lack of air burned her lungs, and Alex found her limbs turning to jelly, unable to help Bella's efforts. In the dark water beyond them, something flickered orange, and Alex thought inexplicably of Jacob, of the flame that lived in her chest.

Her world faded to black, and she only had one last moment to feel guilt. _Jacob would never forgive her for this._

* * *

"Please, _please_\- Alex, come on, just _breathe-_"

_It hurt._

Her first coherent thought was irritation, because she couldn't _just breathe_, everything _hurt,_ her limbs, her throat, her lungs. Then, she registered the hard pebbles beneath her, and the hard, hot, rhythmic pressure against her chest, and that not breathing wasn't a good idea, and she tried to suck in a breath. Instead, burning and disgusting, water came out of her nose and mouth, and she was rolled roughly onto her side, which made the liquid come out a little easier. Finally, just when her vision threatened to fade again, her head growing thick with the lack of oxygen, her throat cleared enough to let her suck in a shaky breath, before she was coughing again, more water coming up her throat.

The pressure on her chest was gone, and she lay there, trying to come back to herself. The hot touch on her back was still there, moving in firm circles, and she shuddered, eyes locking on the sandy, stony shore, on the heaving grey ocean beyond. Someone was crying, and though she wanted to lift her head to look, she found herself entirely unable to do anything but _breathe_.

"It's okay, Bells, she's okay. It'll be okay." Someone was speaking, low and soothing, and the crying lowered in volume.

Alex sucked another unsteady breath of air, the sound her chest made loud and rattling, sticky with the remnants of water in her lungs. _It hurt_.

"Good girl." The new voice was close, a murmur above her, and she shuddered as she recognized the presence above her.

"S-s-sam." She rasped weakly, teeth chattering together. Sam didn't move her, lowering himself instead, and she felt like crying as his face appeared in her vision. "S-sam." She bleated again, quiet and pained. _God, she wanted to get off the beach, she wanted to be warm, she wanted to stop hurting._

"I'm here, baby." Sam's voice was controlled and warm, but Alex knew him well enough – even in her slightly delirious state – to see the emotion in his eyes.

Emotion-

Sudden realisation bloomed, and she tried to sit up, panic giving her strength she didn't have. "Bella!" She cried, fighting the way it felt like her windpipe was closing. She coughed. "She was in the water, where is she? Sam – she was-"

"I'm here." A small voice, just as raspy as her own. Alex stilled, and gave in to the racking coughs that made her collapse back onto the pebbles. When she opened her eyes again, Bella's face was in her eyeline, and she looked distraught. "I'm so sorry, Alex. I didn't-" Alex lost the rest of her words as more coughs wracked her body, some more water coming painfully out of her nose.

"-get them home. I have to get back to the hospital." Sam was speaking, and Bella's eyes were no longer on her, and the other girl looked just as confused as she felt. "Can you walk?" Sam addressed Bella, who hesitated, looked down at Alex, and then back at him and nodded. "Good. Jacob?"

Sam's heat at her back disappeared, and Alex panicked, trying to grasp at him. The large hand that caught her flailing wrist was inexplicably gentle, and the sudden hot flush at the contact made her still. She could _feel_ him, and she kept her head turned away as Jacob lifted her up. "I've got you." He said quietly. Alex couldn't respond, didn't dare look at him. Bella fell into step beside him, bobbing in and out of Alex's periphery. Her lips were blue, and she was shivering. More guilt flooded Alex, as she was cradled by Jacob's bulk, the warmth of him easing her own chill somewhat. Jacob cleared his throat. "Bella, would you mind starting your truck? Sam brought it around."

Again, Bella looked as if she wanted to say something, hesitating just long enough to be obvious, but she nodded mutely, and jogged off ahead. Left alone, the silence felt twice as heavy. Alex stubbornly kept her head facing towards the trees and the road ahead. Jacob, just as obstinate, ignored the gesture. "What happened?" his voice rumbled through her.

"She didn't tell you?" Alex couldn't help but look at him, confused. His face was hard, set in taunt lines that did nothing to ease her fear. "She- she fell. I thought she was going to jump."

"She was." Jacob said, scowling. "She thought she'd try cliff jumping. She said she fell accidentally. Said you jumped in after her."

Alex sucked in a slightly too large breath, chest constricting painfully. At the loud sound of the rattling breath, Jacob frowned harder, muscles in his jaw jumping, as she hacked uncontrollably. "Yeah. I couldn't let her… y'know." She managed, wiping weakly at her mouth.

"It was stupid." Jacob bit out.

Alex narrowed her eyes at him. "What was I supposed to do? You were off killing the blood-bitch-"

"She got away."

"What?" It was Bella who interrupted him, voicing Alex's own shock. Alex turned to see her hanging out of her open truck. "What do you mean she got away?"

Jacob shuddered, just once, and Alex gave him a nervous look. "She got away. Slipped right past us, and headed into the forest. She was going for the water – bloodsuckers have the advantage there. And then I felt-" looking at him already, Alex caught his quick look at her, and she felt the sudden pulse of _him_, their bond, the Imprint stretching between them, and realised he must have felt her terror in the water.

If he hadn't…

"Sam came back with you…" Bella was frowning. "Is everyone else home, too?"

Jacob's face grew shuttered, blank, the look he got when he was trying to hide his own hurt, and Alex's heart leapt into her throat. "Yeah, sort of." He said lowly, and headed for the truck. To her surprise, he simply folded himself into the driver's seat with her still sat in his lap. The steering wheel dug painfully into her hip for a moment before he roughly adjusted the seat. She barely noticed, too preoccupied with his statement. Bella clambered in behind them, closing her door quietly.

"Jake…" she whispered, fresh horror dawning upon her. "Sam said he had to go to the hospital." Jacob breathed out, shakily, and slammed the door shut. Bella gasped lowly, loud in the shelter of the truck's cabin. Alex's wash of faintness had nothing to do with her wrecked state. "Who-?"

"Harry Clearwater had a heart attack." Jacob said, voice tight as he started the truck. It rumbled to life loudly, and with her heart roaring in her ears, Alex didn't hear the conversation between Bella and Jacob, catching a few snatches of Bella's father's name and her guilty question; '_what can I do?'_

Alex closed her eyes. Harry Clearwater was a descendant. His son, Seth, would have been in line for the Phase, and now he had to do it without the guidance of his father. Sure, Seth might have the Pack, but without his _dad_…

* * *

"-lex…Alex. Hey." She was lightly jostled awake, and she blinked to clear her vision. She was still in the truck, but the rain had slowed, and the engine was off. Jacob was almost smiling, eyes tired, mouth held tight with grief. Her brief nap had done nothing to stave off the pain and emotion, and it came back to her in a rush. Jacob's eyebrows twitched, and he touched at his chest briefly, absently. Alex fought to stave off the emotion she obviously burdening him with. He didn't need to bear her own suffering as well as his own. Jacob's eyes flickered out the window briefly. "We're at Emily's, okay? I need to get Bella home."

_She didn't want him to leave._

The selfish desire rose in her along with a wave of nausea. She just wanted Jacob to _stay_, but she wasn't the only one who had nearly drowned today, and besides, she'd kept him from Bella long enough. She looked at the other girl, who was still shivering pathetically in the passenger seat. When she met Bella's eyes, the other girl ducked her head. _She wasn't the only one._ Jacob was looking at her still, and now she could see the faint edge of pleading in his expression. "Yeah. Okay."

"Thank you, Alex." Bella's voice was barely a whisper, but Alex couldn't find it in herself to respond. Jacob opened the truck door, and Alex sat upright as best she could, ready to get down and make her way into the house, though she was unsure how steady she would be.

She needn't have worried. A pair of hands was already upon her, snatching up and out of truck fast enough to startle her into another round of coughing. "Oh, shit! Alex, I'm sorry." _Embry. _Alex could have cried. She turned into her friend, catching a brief glimpse of his startled face before she buried her face in his neck. His surprise only lasted a second, his arms re-securing her position. "I'll take care of her, man." His voice was serious.

"Thanks, Em." Jacob's relief was palpable, and Alex couldn't help the stab of hurt at his obvious desire to be alone with Bella. _She wasn't the only one_, she reminded herself. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Yeah." Embry replied, and Alex could feel him nodding. The rain, though lighter, was somehow _wetter_, and colder than the torrential onslaught at the beach. Alex shivered once, and tensed, trying to hold herself still. "See ya, Jake." He said tightly. Alex wondered if he had ignored Bella on purpose.

He turned then, faster than usual, fast enough to make her stomach lurch at the sudden shift in gravity, and headed towards the house.

It was oddly quiet inside, quiet enough that Alex chanced lifting her head.

The living room was empty, and the lights were off, and only one plate with a half-eaten muffin was at the table. "Where are the others?" she asked. At the sound of her raw voice, Embry's face tightened.

"The girls and Sam are at the hospital." He said, making a beeline towards the couch. He sank into it with an obvious face of relief. He looked just as tired as Jacob had, and Alex wondered how long it had been since he had slept. "Paul and Jared are with Seth and Leah."

"Seth and Leah?" Alex echoed faintly, frowning.

Embry gave her a faintly incredulous look, hand absently smoothing back her wet hair. "Jacob didn't tell you?"

Alex shook her head. Inside, with the warmth of Embry, she didn't feel as cold, but the rattle in her chest hadn't faded and the ache across her body was distracting enough that she couldn't quite put two-and-two together. Leah was Harry's daughter, the eldest, a little younger than Sam, a little elder than Kitty. Seth was the youngest, two years younger than her. "Tell me what?"

Embry's face fell, lips twisting. The pretty planes of his face weren't built for grief, and she wished she could make it better. "Harry's heart attack – it made them both Phase. No one was expecting it… they're out of their minds, its all Jared and Paul can do to stop them from rampaging through LaPush."

"Leah's a girl." Alex said dumbly. "I thought girls couldn't Phase."

"Yeah, so did everyone else." Embry said, shaking his head. "And Seth's so _young_…"

Alex sighed, and gave in to the wave of exhaustion, letting her head fall forwards onto Embry's shoulder. He cradled the back of her head like she was an infant, and pressed his lips briefly to the side of her head. "I thought you were dead. We _all_ did. Jacob was-" she felt him shake his head, felt a faint tremor rock his body.

"I'm okay." She whispered.

Embry made a disbelieving noise. "Somehow, right now, I doubt you are." He stood, keeping her tucked against him, and started for the bathroom. "You need a shower and some dry clothes."

Alex stiffened as he opened the bathroom door. "You are _not_ watching me shower."

Embry snorted lightly, the gesture feeling a little forced. "Don't flatter yourself. You ain't my type, Xena." Alex made herself laugh at his attempt at humour. "But I _will_ be right outside." He said threateningly.

Set on her feet for the first time since she'd been pulled from the water, Alex was painfully aware of her body's weakness, of the throbbing bruise on the back of her head, of the strain in her muscles, of the rattling rasp of her lungs, the burn in her nose and throat. _She could have died_. The realisation made her sway in place, reaching out to grab at the sink desperately.

Embry, as if attuned, called out from the hall. "You alright?"

"Y-yeah." She said, meeting her own eyes in the mirror. She looked like a wreck, pale and waterlogged, mouth still faintly purple, with bloodshot eyes and bedraggled hair. She turned on the shower hurriedly, stepping under the spray once it started steaming, in relief.

The hot water seemed to ease her tense muscles somewhat and she worked methodically to clean herself. The scent of the sea rose in the air as the salt water came washing off her, and she pretended the smell didn't frighten her, that it didn't make her think of the pounding waves and the desperate fear closing her throat.

Embry must have snuck in silently, because when she emerged from the shower, a pile of clothes had appeared by the sink. She dried her hair as best she could with a towel, unwilling to exacerbate her headache by blasting a hairdryer in her ears.

The clothes weren't her own. A large pair of worn sweats she thought might have been Sam's and an old holey shirt she recognized as Jared's sat on top of a pair of Emily's socks. She pulled them on, smiling bemusedly as she tied the string of the sweats tight.

Embry was waiting for her, and before she could protest, he was picking her up again. Alex of the morning, Alex of full strength and vigour might have protested, but this Alex – nearly-drowned-and-bone-tired-Alex – didn't resist. He settled back into the couch, reaching with one long arm for the throw blanket to drape over both of them before he pressed his nose once to her neck and sniffed audibly.

Alex wrinkled her nose, waiting until he met her gaze to raise a judging eyebrow. He shrugged. "You smell better now." He said simply.

"What, eau-de-ocean was a bit strong?" she tried to joke. Embry remained serious.

"You smelt like fear, Alex. You smelt like distress, and now you don't." He said, tugging on the collar of her borrowed shirt. Alex blinked, heart panging in her chest. "You should get some rest." He said gently.

"The bedrooms are that way." Alex nodded towards the hallway, and it was Embry's turn to raise a brow.

"You want to be alone right now?" _Damn._ He knew her too well. Maybe knew her a little better than she knew herself, and she didn't think she had loved her best friend more than she did just then. Because _no_. No, she did not want to be alone, didn't think she could be. She shook her head mutely, and let Embry tuck her comfortably against his chest, kicking up his own long legs along the back of the couch, and closing his eyes.

She felt almost, _almost_ better. Better – but for the distant ache of something missing. Something she didn't want to put a name to. Alex closed her eyes almost defiantly. She could survive without _it_. it didn't define her, and it clearly didn't define _him._

Sleep found her, despite her restless mind, and she gave into it willingly.


	30. Mine: Chapter 29

**A/N: Hello lovely readers! We are winding up with New Moon! I was wondering if you guy would prefer me to continue Jacob and Alex's story in this fic, or if I should make a separate fic for the sequel? Again, I'd just like to say thank you to everyone still reading. This is an angsty fic, and I know a lot of you were hoping for fluffy happy times, but unfortunately, there's still some bumps in the road before we get a happy ever after. Also, I don't know how many of you were waiting for Leah, but I certainly was! Enjoy the second last chapter of Mine!**

* * *

A sudden swooping shift in gravity woke her with a start, and she screamed, coming to awareness mid-air. Her throat felt as if she'd swallowed sandpaper, and the jolt in her breathing made her chest seize and she began to cough violently.

"Oh! Shit, shit, shit!" The loud but familiar voice eased the panic that had gripped her, and she was set back on her feet abruptly. A large hand slapped awkwardly in-between her shoulder blades, which only made things worse. Alex tried to turn and swat at Paul's hand, but doubled over instead with the force of her heaving shoulders.

"Paul, you fuck-wit!" Embry came to her rescue, stumbling blearily up from the couch, and shoving the older boy roughly off of her, and crouching to meet her eyes. "What can I do?" he asked worriedly, mouth turning down at her loud rattling breaths. She tried to shrug, unsure herself. Maybe she still had water in her lungs or something. _Would it evaporate?_ Alex had no clue, and closed her eyes, focussing on regulating her breathing. Embry's hands left her shoulders as her breathing slowed, and he reached over her to swipe at Paul again. "Stupid."

"Sorry…" Paul said mournfully, and Alex straightened gingerly to look at him. He looked – as the others had – completely wrecked. He wasn't the only one who had returned. Jared was slumped over at the kitchen table, nursing a tall glass of soda, and pressing a bloody cloth to a long cut up his arm.

At Alex's attention, he managed a smile. "Glad you're okay, Alex." He said.

"Thanks." She said, frowning. "Jesus, Jared – what happened? Was it the vamp?"

Jared grimaced, leaning back to expose his abs, and another set of raised, healing wounds running almost the full length of his torso. "Leah." He sighed. "We have no idea where that red-headed bitch is, but right now, she's the least of our problems."

Alex looked at Embry, who shrugged, obviously as out of the loop as she was. Paul ran a tired hand over his face, and Alex noticed the cuts and bruises Paul was sporting too, including an almost healed nick across his forehead. "Leah and Seth are still Phased, and they don't seem to be able-"

"Or willing…" Jared interrupted Paul with a grumble.

Paul rolled his eyes at his friend, "to Phase back. Poor Sue is still in shock, the girls got her home… and Bella Swan just fucked off with a Cullen, and Jacob's lost the plot." Alex felt her heart stutter. _Bella was… gone?_ "The vamp fled east, and we can't find her trail. I doubt she's coming back." Paul said, and then reached for her. "I'm just happy you're alive, Alex, seriously." Alex returned Paul's fierce embrace, burying her face in his chest as he rocked her back and forth slightly. "Kitty's been - well – just holding it together."

Alex winced. "That is _not_ going to be a fun conversation." Paul laughed, and let her go with a fond and aggressive ruffle of her hair. Alex hesitated, biting at her lip. "Paul, what do you mean about Jacob… is he okay?"

Paul gave her an unreadable look. "He'll be okay." He said shortly. "You jumped off that cliff after Bella, didn't you?"

Alex frowned. "Yeah… I couldn't let her drown." She was getting tired of explaining herself. How was she to have known that they had been nearby? "What was I supposed to do, Paul?" she asked a little defensively.

He shook his head. "You were brave, Alex. Stupid – but brave. I'm just thinking… Jacob could be a little more fucking-"

"Paul." Jared's voice was sharp but tired, and something told Alex that whatever Paul had been about to say, Jared had already heard it. "Enough, dude. It's not the time."

"Yeah, whatever." Paul said sourly, scowling like thunder. Alex looked between the two of them, Jared offering her another weak smile. "I'm just saying. He's being overdramatic." He reached out almost unconsciously, ruffling her hair again. "I'm going to go check on the newbies." He said, and stomped towards the door.

"Are they here?" Alex asked, squinting out of the window, and realising belatedly it was pitch-black, and obviously well after nightfall. She must have been asleep for ages.

Jared shook his head, sinking back down until his face was squashed on the table again. "Not in the backyard, but we managed to herd 'em closer to the house, just in case they shift back." Already, his eyes were sliding shut. "They'll at least…have somewhere to…to sleep." He managed, his face falling slack. Alex smiled slightly as he began to snore quietly.

"I'm sure Jacob's okay." Embry said quietly, and Alex turned to meet his worried expression.

Alex nodded. "Yeah… I guess." She wasn't so sure. "But if her vamp is back in town, he'll be devastated. He really _loved_ her, I think." Embry looked troubled. "It's cool. I get it."

"Do you?" He asked quietly, and there was an odd knowing look on his face that made her frown. He shook his head. "Never mind. Are you gonna sleep some more?" he looked a little longingly back at the couch, and Alex smiled.

"No, but you go ahead." There were things Alex had to do now. Her accident today, whilst justified, had caused more damage than she had intended. Bella could not have chosen a worse time to perform her little stunt, and her sudden disappearance wasn't helping matters. Whilst Alex could understand Jacob's despair, whilst she could blame him for his emotion, right now, the Pack needed him.

Alex couldn't go out into the woods and help Paul wrangle two newly Phased werewolves, she couldn't just go and help Sam arrange a funeral, she couldn't go and comfort a woman who had just lost her husband, and she couldn't help track the vampire that had eluded them. But she could help the Pack stay whole, and she thought she could at least ease some of the burden if she could just _bring Jacob home._

* * *

**_Jacob._**

It was her. He knew the second she entered his consciousness, could feel the invasion, and place the soft sensation as Alex immediately.

_What?_

Perhaps he could have been more polite, but she _had_ promised to never do it again, and right now anger was all he could really focus on.

**_I'm sorry._**

It was easier now to discern her feelings, made more palpable in this state, joined as they were. Right now, she was sadder than he expected, frustrated, a little lonely, but mostly _wanting_. There was a lot of _that_ going around tonight. Bella's face swam in his memory again, the memory of her turning from him, choosing that _bloodsucker _again-

He howled, the sound tearing from him just as involuntarily as his initial shift. It echoed off the quiet forest around him, loud and mournful. He should have better control than he did, but Bella had always been his weakness. _Fuck_.

"_He left you, Bella. He didn't want you anymore, remember?"_

"_I'm not gonna let him kill himself out of guilt_."

Jacob snarled wheeling in tight circles. Distantly, he could feel the minds of the two newest members of the Pack. Leah seemed to be even more angry than he was, and Seth's distress was as palpable as the dirt beneath his paws – but he blocked them out. Their grief was their own, and maybe it was callous of him to think that, but he just needed to-

**_They need you. The Pack needs you-_**

_"Please, Bella. Just... stay here. Not for Charlie. For me..." _

He could perfectly picture the way Bella's face had creased in regret, in pain that _he_ had caused, and yet… and yet… she had turned from him. That stinking sucker beside her had the gall to look offended by his words, and it seemed Bella had sided with her, with _him_ again.

"_I'm begging you. Please_."

_"Bye, Jacob."_

She had chosen Edward and left without a second glance. _After everything he had-_

**_Come home._**

Alex was insistent, and the Imprint was just as forcible. His wolf didn't like hurting his Imprint, but Jacob wasn't ready to return, wasn't ready to think and be. He would dissolve out here if he could, just lie down and be washed away by the rain… he turned his head to the East, to the mountains, to the wide world beyond La Push. _If he ran, maybe he could escape it all._

**_Jacob, please… for me. Just this once._**

And then Alex was gone, and Jacob was alone with his thoughts and traitor heart. Because right then, he _hated_ Bella. He hated her. She'd told him once about the hole she felt had been punched through her, the horrible, aching displacement, the theft of her joy, her heart – taken by the Cullens, taken by _him._ Right then, he thought he understood it. Because he _ached_. He had put _everything_ into her, into making her smile. _Fuck._ She had turned away from him like she was nothing. Maybe he should do that same.

Bella had also said once that Alex was intimidating, that Alex wanted him all to herself. He'd laughed, juvenile and unassuming, so sure she was exaggerating, maybe a little pleased she had been jealous. That had been before all the Imprinting shit, back when he thought he'd just been crushing on Bella, before he knew love-

_Fuck._

He turned, and raced for home.

* * *

Alex sat up slowly from where she had crumpled onto the ground. The light rain that had been a gentle mist had turned back into a downpour, and she was soaked for the second time that day. She'd tried to sit up against a tree, but it looked as though her unconscious body hadn't cooperated.

Jacob was…

_Torn up._

That was the best way she could think to describe it; with his messy, red-raw emotions, pain and anger burning through him. Alex had known Jacob loved Bella, but she hadn't known _just how much_. Was it cruel of her to wonder why? What exactly did Bella give him, to make him so enamoured, so reliant?

And it seemed that she'd failed anyway. Jacob hadn't been listening to her, and she hadn't recognised the trees around him. He was too far from home, and didn't seem to care. Alex thudded her head back into the solid trunk of the tree, wiping her mud-stained hands on her wet jeans.

She was just so fucking tired. She just wanted-

Footsteps in the bracken, just audible over the patter of raindrops, made her still. She didn't have time to be properly frightened, as a tall figure stepped out of the trees. Alex blinked, gaping for a moment before regaining her senses. "Jacob – you came back." Jacob's face was unreadable, but there was something hot and heavy in his eyes that made her heart ache. He was shirtless and barefoot, and Alex could see steam visibly rolling off of him as the cold rain hit his bare skin. He was still staring at her, eyes like thunder, and Alex realised he might have come back just to yell at her. She had broken a promise afterall. "I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have, but I was just _worried_ about you. And the others, they need you right now, and I-"

He moved so quickly, so inhumanly fast that Alex let out an aborted cry, stumbling backwards as he lurched for her. He was in front of her before she could take another breath, and she felt her back hit the wet trunk of the tree again. This close, she could feel the heat radiating off of him, suddenly very aware of how much _larger_ he was, as she craned her neck to meet his eyes. His hands moved slowly, tremulously, and Alex sucked in a breath as his fingertips trailed up her arms, up over her shoulders, skimming her pulse, until he had her face between his hands, as if cradling her head. The Imprint had flared to life, and that _desire_ made her heart begin to pick up its beat, and Jacob's eyes darted to her chest, as if he was listening. "Jake." She said, quietly, almost a warning.

Then he kissed her, and she was alit in a dizzying wave of euphoric heat so overwhelming that she almost tipped over.

His lips were demanding, clumsy – Alex realised distantly this must have been his first kiss – and as his grip tightened upon her face, she reached up to grasp his wrists, weakly tugging at him. _This wasn't-_ He bit at her bottom lip, a challenge, and she sighed involuntarily, leaning into him as the flame inside her grew and grew and grew- _no. NO._

Alex shoved at Jacob as hard as she could, trying to lean away. He didn't move far, but his hands dropped from her face, and she took a shaky breath, trying to calm down. "What are you doing?" she asked breathlessly, her lips tingling, skin on fire, fingertips aching with the need to touch him again. He opened his mouth briefly, as if to explain himself, and Alex made the mistake of watching the quick rise and fall of his shoulders, his swollen lips, his blown pupils. _Shit._

They collided again, and this time he seemed surer of himself, and Alex groaned as he pushed her firmly against the tree, the full length of their bodies pressed together. The rain around her seemed to be evaporating, the heat of their union defying nature. And it felt so _right._ Everywhere they touched, fit together like interlocking puzzle pieces, each breath shared, the hands on her body, her nails raking down his chest, fingers, skin, lips, tongues-

The snarling yowl that ripped loudly around the trees was their only warning before Jacob was bowled over by a large, white furred form. The force of the take down left Alex prone, eyes wide as she watched an unfamiliar wolf bare its teeth and snap at Jacob's neck. Jacob burst into Phase, and Alex pressed herself into the trunk of the tree as Jacob's massive form took up what felt like every inch of the tiny clearing.

The white wolf's size was near laughable compared to Jacob's bulk, but whoever it was _fast,_ and enraged in way Alex couldn't remember seeing since Jacob's own first Phase. She couldn't make out _anything_ but fury in the white wolf's eyes, and it was terrifying.

"Fuck! _LEAH!"_

Paul emerged from the direction of the house, and threw himself into the melee without a second's hesitation, and Alex froze in horror as he waded between the snapping and snarling wolves, still human. Paul let out a growl of his own, bone chilling and loud, and there was a weight to it that made Alex's mouth dry up, as he reached for Leah, somehow managing to get his arms around her muzzle, roaring with exertion as Leah bucked up and around him, trying to force her jaws open again.

Jacob was panting, and began to pace, eyes still locked on Leah as she thrashed around in Paul's grip. Alex gasped as one of Leah's paws caught Paul's torso, opening up a gash that began to bleed.

Paul grunted, digging his bare feet into the churned up earth and held his ground. "Leah, stop! You can't attack an _Imprint-_"

And then the white wolf was twisting and shrinking, fur disappearing, bones cracking and reforming, muzzle disappearing into a human face, and Paul lost his grip on the suddenly very naked, very human girl that slipped out of his arms and into the mud with a sneer and another snarl. Alex blinked, averting her gaze as Leah Clearwater stood on her own two feet, and glared at them all. She seemed unashamed of her nakedness, upright in her fury, and what Alex recognized as grief in her eyes.

"I'm not attacking _her_." Leah jabbed a finger at Alex, with such derision in her tone that Alex shrank into the tree. Leah turned her glower on Jacob's form, baring her teeth like they were still fangs. "He's the one I want to _gut-_" whatever had made her so furious with Jacob took a hold of her again, and Alex watched as she shook, blurring, and Phased again – exploding into the white wolf with a furious howl.

Paul rubbed his hands over his face, smearing his own blood and mud across his cheeks, completely exhausted. Alex shivered, chill creeping down her spine as the mad heat from the kiss faded away to be replaced with an uneasy nausea. Something wasn't _right_-

Leah managed to get a hold of herself again, and she Phased back again, still shaking like she had a fever. "He's kissing her, breaking her little heart, just because he wants to make_ Bella_ jealous. _I heard him think it-_" Jacob leapt at her, and they dissolved again into combat, Leah yowling with such volume that Alex covered her ears as she felt her stomach sink. _Right._ She nodded to herself, and took a step away. Paul had turned back to the fight. Alex took another step. And then another. And another, until she was out of sight. There was nobody watching her leave. Still with her hands clasped tightly over her ears, Alex stumbled her way through the trees, away from the fight, away from the wolves, away from the house, away from the Pack, away from _him_.

And she pretended that the tears running down her cheeks was rain, and she pretended that she wasn't hurting, pretended that she didn't care that he used her. After all, it was just magic and make believe. She'd been fighting the stupid Imprint since it had happened. Why should she care that he was too?

_Why did she care?_


	31. Mine: Chapter 30

**A/N: Here we are! We have officially finished New Moon! I'll be taking some time to write Eclipse, so please be patient. Alex and Jacob's story does not end here, and I'd just like to say thank you to everyone who gave me such kind feedback on the last chapter - this early update and final chapter of Mine part 1 is for you! **

* * *

"Alex? Honey, you have a visitor."

Alex opened her eyes, eyeing the familiar cracks and ridges of her ceiling with her usual apathy. A visitor? She had specifically asked her family to send away _anyone_ even vaguely associated with the Pack, and had included Kitty in her banned list. Of course, her brother and parents hadn't understood why the people she had listed were banned, and she'd already suffered through Topher's clumsy recitation of a weird lecture-apology hybrid that Kitty had made him give her.

But her parents had been so worried about her aspiration pneumonia, raging fever and mild concussion that she'd been able to guilt them into compliance easily enough.

Alex had made her own way home after the events of Thursday. Juvenile and petty as it was, Alex had not been able to stomach the thought of seeing _anyone_ from La Push who _knew_, who would tell her that the Imprint was destiny, that it was right, that she should forgive and forget, that her fucked up ability and her bond was a _gift_.

Her parents had driven her to the hospital after she woke them with a coughing fit, nearly fainting in her attempt to get upstairs. The doctor who had treated her had told her she was lucky to be alive, that if she had waited much longer to get medical attention, she would have been much worse.

Alex felt _much worse_ as it was. Her fever hadn't broken yet, and she was still racked by coughing fits, and struggled to draw breath too deeply. Plus her colourful array of antibiotics and cough medicines all tasted terrible, even if her nose was so stuffy and blocked, she couldn't taste much of anything.

Despite her sorry state, Alex was _lonely._ Lonely enough to try and sit up, and rasp to her mother waiting outside the door. "Okay…" Quil was still mad at her, and in all the chaos and constant trips to the doctors, she hadn't been able to mend that bridge. Yet another _shitty_ thing she could attribute to the cluster fuck of monsters and magic she was trying to ignore.

Her door opened, and her mother stuck her head in with a strange eyebrow wiggle. Alex frowned at the strange giddy smile on her face, about to ask her who it was, when her visitor stepped into the room.

It was reflex panic that made her jerk back, grabbing for solid support, and spilling her various medicines across the floor. "Oh, Alex, what-" Her mother took a step forwards, as if to help, a step too close to the _thing_ hovering just inside her doorway.

"Get out, mom." Alex gasped, throat seizing and chest tightening. Her mother frowned, clearly about to argue, and Alex made a wordless desperate growl, effect heightened by the old-man-who-smoked-all-his-life rasp to her voice. "Out!" her voice cracked, and her mother sighed, slowly backing out, but Alex didn't miss her last admiring glance at her visitor.

Edward Cullen raised his hands slowly in surrender, bright gold eyes giving her a look of curiosity. Alex was suddenly reminded of her last encounter with the Cullen family, Alice and Jasper's almost kidnap of her in the ice-cream parlour, and as Edward smiled slightly, she was also reminded what Alice had told her. _What the fuck do you want?_ Alex thought viciously, watching as Edward's brow quirked.

"I heard that you had taken ill." He said, voice quiet and inhumanly musical. Alex grunted, struggling to prop herself up properly, unwilling to take her eyes off him. "I'm not here to hurt you, Alexandra." He said, sounding almost amused. He could shove his condescending, crooked little smile up his ass. Alex was _not_ going to tolerate a _vampire_ of all creatures laughing at her. Edward's face twisted in obvious regret, "I didn't mean to offend you. I'm simply unused to humans reacting with appropriate fear."

"Appropriate is right, sucker." Alex retorted, sting made weaker by her hoarse voice.

Edward inclined his head. "May I?" he gestured to the mess she'd made of the floor. She nodded shortly, and clenched her jaw in an attempt not to react as he blurred with vampiric speed, setting her things back atop her bedside table in no time at all.

"Thanks." She said begrudgingly. Edward gave her another small nod, before he stepped back to stand as far from her as her room allowed, backlit by her open window. It was a rare sunny day, and she was suddenly longing to get outside and skate or surf or, _anything_, just so she could feel the sun on her face and the wind in her hair. She wasn't built to be idle. "I'll ask you one more time before I call the wolves; what do you want?" she folded her arms across her chest.

Edward quirked another annoyingly perfect brow. Seriously, even her brows were not as manicured. "I thought you weren't speaking to the Pack." _Great. _So, the vampire in her bedroom knew she had essentially marooned herself without protection. "Which is part of the reason why I came actually."

_That_ surprised her. "What?" She frowned at the perfect looking man.

He smiled at her. "I've come to offer you my thanks, and my apologies."

"What." Alex said again, dumbly.

"Alice wanted to come along too – in fact, my whole family extends their gratitude." Edward continued, and Alex shook her head. Did all vampires talk in riddles? "For saving Bella. And by extension, my own, ah, _life_." He clarified ruefully.

"Oh." Alex blinked. "I mean- I didn't, like, _save_ her save her. I don't know, I mean… she just- and I- uh, yeah." She trailed off lamely. She was _supremely_ uncomfortable.

Edward chuckled lightly, the sound like a song. Alex squinted. It was _very_ hard to stay objective when they were built to draw you in. Edward sobered at her thought, and pressed a hand briefly to his heart. "I owe you _everything_, Alexandra Faye."

_Jesus Christ, okay._ Vampires were also _extremely_ dramatic. Noted. "Uh. It's chill, dude. Don't sweat it." Alex said awkwardly, waving a hand at him limply.

Edward sighed, almost smiling. "I'll repay you one day." He promised, a little less intensely. Alex tried to smile at him, well aware it was coming across a little grimace like. "I've also come to talk to you about Jacob. He needs you."

Alex tried to respond, but the shock of his statement made her words catch in her mouth and she choked on her own saliva, abused throat tightening and setting her off. She buried her face in the crook of her elbow, bent double with the force of her hacking coughs. A glass of water was pushed carefully into her free hand, and when she could breathe normally, she took a small sip. Edward had already returned to the other side of the room, with no indication he had moved. The distant desire for warm hands and arms to hold her, for the care she had once had, made her throat tighten again – this time with emotion. "Jacob doesn't need me." She said finally, clutching the cup in both hands and looking into the clear water like it would agree with her. "He needs your _girlfriend."_ _Damn_. Even she noticed the bitter edge to her voice.

Edward graciously didn't comment upon it, instead folding his arms across his chest in an oddly human gesture. "He came to see me and Bella a little while ago. Well. He came to yell at us," There was a note of distaste in _his_ voice this time, "He came to get Bella in trouble, and to tell her about you." Her confusion must have shown on her face, or maybe he was just able to process her raw emotion as well as her coherent thoughts. "About the kiss." He explained gently. Alex stilled. "And to threaten my life, though it's hardly a new sentiment." He said, almost sassily.

"I still don't get how any of this is my problem." Alex said stiffly, hands tightening around the glass.

"As someone who knew Jacob both before and after his transformation, I can tell you he misses you. Even if he can't articulate it. This entanglement – the Imprint, I believe you call it – doesn't lessen your connection."

"You're right. It just makes it forced. Makes it worse. Overwhelming." She said cynically, shaking her head.

Edward tilted his head, considering. "I've never experienced anything like it. You two are connected in a way I thought impossible. You shouldn't discount that."

Alex rolled her eyes. "Don't _you_ start. I've had enough of people telling me how fucking lucky I am to be '_spell-bound'_ to an idiot."

Edward held up a hand in surrender. "I digress. Still. He's off-balance without you. Misguided though his actions were, I truly don't think he meant to hurt you."

Alex smiled sardonically. "I don't know what's worse. The fact he kissed me, or the fact he kissed me without even thinking about my feelings." Edward was quiet, and for the first time, Alex wasn't off put by his quiet contemplative stare. _Fuck, she really was lonely. _"Does Bella know? About the Imprint, I mean." She asked, desperate for a distraction.

Edward shook his head. "It is not my place to tell Tribe secrets. And I doubt Jacob would want her to know, even if it were not such a precious secret."

"Yeah, same." Alex grinned savagely. "Well."

"Well." Edward echoed her. "Think about it. Jacob needs his best friend, and so do you."

Alex shook her head. "We haven't been best friends in a while." She admitted quietly, the admission making her sadder than she thought it would.

"Jacob doesn't seem to think that." Edward said. Alex looked back down at her lap. "I'll leave you to rest. Again, I give you my thanks. I hope to see you soon." He said politely.

Alex couldn't help but grin at that, looking back up to raise her eyebrows at him. "Yeah, no offence Edwin, but I hope I don't."

Edward smiled back, "No offence taken, Alexandra."

Alex coughed awkwardly. "You can call me Alex, I guess."

Edward paused at her door, looking back with a pleased look. "Goodbye, Alex."

"Later, Edwin."

Alex didn't hear the vampire on the stairs, the only indication he'd left the gentle click of her front door closing. She sighed, letting herself relax against her bedhead. She should probably be more angry with the invading vamp, who'd left her with more troubles to overthink than she'd started with. But she found she didn't have the energy to, and though he was her mortal enemy, he was also the first friendly-ish face she'd seen in days.

And maybe, just maybe, he was right.

Maybe she _should_ talk to Jacob. At least as his friend. She couldn't – she _wouldn't_ – address those _other_ feelings she had. Jacob had been – was – her _best _friend. She should be there for him, as a friend. Just because he had hurt her, didn't mean he was hurting any less himself. Cutting herself off from the others had also been a shitty choice, because she missed them too, even if she hadn't been admitting it.

First, though, she wanted Quil to know she was sorry. Alex couldn't keep doing this to him, and part of her honestly wouldn't have blamed him if he dropped her for good this time.

It was an effort to get out of her bed, and she had to pause twice as her head swam worryingly, holding on to the wall for support as she made her way slowly towards her phone charging in the corner of her room. There were a few missed calls, some texts she ignored. She sank down the wall, and dialled Quil's number.

The ringing went on and on and one, and Alex realised with a sinking feeling, that Quil wasn't going to pick up. As the call rang out, Alex let her head thump back lightly against her wall, and humiliatingly, tears began to prickle at the corner of her eyes. She'd _really_ fucked it up. She should have seen this coming. She was a terrible friend, she couldn't be surprised she kept losing them. if she just-

Her phone began to ring.

Hurriedly, she picked up her phone, so eagerly that she fumbled it. Catching it with a faint curse, she answered. "Quil?" she rasped.

"_Jesus, you sound like shit, Alex."_ It was Quil, vibrant and cheery, and Alex pulled the phone away from her ear for a moment to rub at her teary cheeks, and sniffle. "_Are you crying?"_

"W-what? No." Alex said reflexively. "Quil, I just- I thought you weren't speaking to me."

Quil laughed, and Alex started at the low throaty sound. In fact, now she thought about it, it did sound as though his voice had dropped again. "_I am. I mean I wasn't. I was mad. But I get it." _Alex shook her head, pressing her free fingers into her temple as she tried to make sense of Quil's words. There was noise in the background, what sounded like the splash of water and laughter, voices overlapping. A low voice sounded just out of earshot. "_Nah, I don't know."_ Quil responded to whatever the question had been.

"What?" Alex managed, head throbbing slightly, "Get what? You're not mad?" The same voice spoke again, except this time, Alex could make it out.

"_…How is she?"_

"Is that Embry?" Alex croaked loudly, far louder than she intended, and she winced at the volume, and the way her throat tightened reflexively, making her start to cough again. "Quil, where-" she tried, inbetween wheezes, "Where-?"

"_Whoa, take it easy, Alex. Um. I was gonna tell you in person, but apparently you're not seeing anyone, and also it only happened like, three days ago-" _Quil began hurriedly, but Alex put two and two together on her own, and let out a strangled kind of scream. "_Are you okay?!" _he asked.

Alex took a breath, trying to reassure him. "You know. You've Phased." It wasn't a question.

"_Hell yeah, I did."_ Quil sounded… proud. Happy. It threw her for a loop, and she sat quietly for a long moment, processing the news. _"Hello? Alex? Did you die?"_ There was a faint scuffle, and a low chorus of voices. _"No, I'm kidding I can hear her breathing. Alex?"_

"Are you okay?" Alex asked finally, voice faint.

_"Oh, I'm better than okay. I'm finally taller than you."_ Quil said joyfully. Alex closed her eyes, biting her lip. "_Hey, I'm really okay. And I'm not mad at you. I'm just impressed you managed to keep your massive mouth shut for so long."_ Alex wasn't sure what to say. Wasn't sure what she _would_ say if she spoke. "_Dude_?"

"I'll call you later." She spat out, hurriedly ending the call before he could respond, and launching her phone across the room. It hit the wall with a clatter, and she buried her face in her hands with a distinct feeling of distress.

Why was everything to be tainted with the strange magic that governed this pocket of the world? Why was she cursed with it? Why couldn't she save just one person from a life controlled by the uncontrollable?

She wished then, with a sudden and violent ferocity, that she had never come to La Push.


	32. Prologue: Fire

_I think it's strange that I still call you_

_When I've got nothing to say_

_The truth is that I still adore you_

_And nothing really matters anyway_

**\- Playing On My Mind, The 1975**

* * *

**Prologue: Fire**

* * *

Fear was an emotion I was intimately familiar with. The skin crawling, nerve prickling dread that turned the sun to shadow; I knew it well.

This wasn't fear.

This was terror, revulsion, horror – blood turning to ice, mouth drying, body trembling sort of anxiety that destroyed rationality. And the worst part was, I wasn't even afraid for myself. I couldn't even control it. Because I wasn't the one staring death in the face. I wasn't the one fighting for my life.

All I could do was watch.

The howls could be heard from miles away; mourning and rage mingling in a deafening chorus. The flame inside me was growing dimmer.

_All I could do was watch…_


	33. Playing On My Mind: Chapter 1

_**A/N: sup! here we go, with the first chapter of Playing On My Mind! Buckle up, babies xx**_

* * *

_It all kicked off and it's been playing on my mind_

_The whole thing has been playing on my mind_

**\- Playing On My Mind, The 1975**

* * *

Alex was going crazy.

Like, tear out her hair and put her head through a wall crazy. Her dad had said she had cabin fever, and then had laughed and told her to cheer up, because at least she didn't have an _actual_ fever anymore. Alex had thrown her pencil case at him.

The school year was nearly over, and though the old-Alex had spent every day waiting for the holidays, to be free from school, the bed-ridden-Alex would have taken a double period of algebra over another second of staring at her bedroom walls. The doctor had even said she could go for a short walk by herself at their last visit, but when she'd attempted to go round the block, and hadn't been able to make it to the end of their street without almost falling over, her parents had placed her right back on bedrest.

In her own defence, Alex had pointed out that it was a very long street, and she'd been going up the incline. Her parents had ignored her.

And so, she had decided, she was going to make a break for freedom. The clear, sunny weekend skies were calling her name.

She'd gotten up at the crack of dawn, just after her parents rose for work, and she'd shuffled her way down stairs, hunched pathetically over a mug of tea, and when they'd arrived in the kitchen, made a big deal about having had a terrible sleep, and when they'd told her to rest up, she'd nodded sadly and trudged back up to her room to go back to bed. Alex thought she had a potential career in Hollywood. Her performance had been Winona-level perfect.

She sat up slowly as she heard her parent's cars drive away, the rest of the house still quiet. Kitty had been staying with Paul recently, and Topher lived a nocturnal lifestyle. He wouldn't rise until the afternoon. It left Alex's road to freedom clear.

* * *

The sun was gently rising by the time she started towards the beach. This time, her hike was on the downhill, and it was only after she'd breached the tree line that her weakened lungs and general out-of-shape-ness began to hit her.

She leant briefly against a tree as her breathing began to come a little ragged. Her doctor had assured her and her parents that the danger had passed, that all that remained was for whatever fluid or foreign material still in her lungs to drain naturally, and her fitness to improve again. Still, if she pushed too hard, the occasional coughing fit would still set her back. She was beginning to grow adjusted to the fact that she sounded like a heavy smoker, and had taken to popping throat lozenges like candy.

"Come on, loser." She told herself, eyeing the patches of blue ocean she could make out through the trees. "You can do it."

Doggedly, she kept on walking, tramping determinedly over bracken and stone, towards the beach. Even now, pathetic as it was, the faint touch of the salt air made her lips draw up into an involuntary smile. The flush of emotion, the memories, all pushed her harder and faster, and though her breath began to saw loudly, crackling slightly in her chest, she spilled out onto the sand with a small shout of delight.

She sighed, closing her eyes and lifting her arms to the sky, as if to touch the buttery-warm sunlight filtering down from the mercifully cloudless and clear sky. Absently, reached down to slip off her sneakers, wiggling her bare toes in the sand, and casting a look down to the water.

The waves closest to the shore were gentle, lapping at the golden sand with a rhythm she knew well.

The sudden wave of panic that hit her shouldn't have surprised her as much as it did, as her gaze went to the darker green of the water beyond the softer surf, to the high imposing silhouettes of the cliffs she had-

Alex closed her eyes, clenching her shaking hands, and willing away the chill that had gripped her.

She was okay. She was fine. She was alive.

_Maybe the beach hadn't been such a good idea…_

No. She was better than this.

Alex forced herself to open her eyes and take a steadying breath, and take another step towards the water, still harmlessly foaming at the shore.

_Ice cold, and black like the night sky, the water closed around her, the currents dragging at her with a visceral grip. Her body was aching, lungs screaming for breath, and Bella was floundering beside her. That panicked resignation gripping her heart. They weren't going to make it. The ocean surged upon them, unforgiving. She wasn't going to make it-_

She couldn't help the pathetic whimper she let out, as the sudden tumultuous flash of sensation and memory assaulted her. She was still a few feet from the water, and though it should have been easy to broach the distance, take the few steps to the surf, she _couldn't_.

_God, what was wrong with her?_

Alex pushed back her fly away hair angrily, as a breeze sent her locks flying around her face. She was better than this. But at the thought of trying again, at taking another step, she found her muscles locking up, panic freezing her in place, her body betraying her. "_Fine_ then." She spat in the direction of the water, flipping the ocean off with shaking hands.

Her embarrassed anger carried her down the sand until her lungs began to ache again, and she was forced to slow down. She hated the feeling of being so weak. In her single minded rush down the shore, she realised she'd ended up close to the stretch of sand that was usually claimed by the Pack, the well-worn track that had been made by countless pairs of paws and feet heading through to the beach from Emily's house marked by someone's long abandoned towel.

Alex eyed the faded pink fabric hanging as a makeshift flag from one of the old dead trunks that littered the rocky line between forest soil and sand.

She hadn't come out to see them. And for almost a month and a half now, she had been actively avoiding them. At first, the calls and texts had come daily, but after the first two weeks, with her parents turning her visitors away at the door, all contact had just… dropped off.

Alex had also been determinedly ignoring the faint cold ache in her chest that had nothing to do with her pneumonia. She didn't know much about the Imprint, but she knew it had to have something to do with the accursed connection she'd been denying.

Edward's words came back to her; "_Jacob needs his best friend, and so do you."_

She threw her head back with a loud sigh, scowling at bright blue of the sky. _Damn it._ she'd regret it if she didn't try and be there for him. Jacob had made it very clear – even before the whole Imprint debacle – that she was a bad friend. If she wanted to redeem herself, then maybe – and _god, _she couldn't believe she was taking the advance of a _vampire_ – maybe she needed to… _be there for him._

Alex groaned, mind made up. Shaking her head at her own internal debate, she turned and stomped towards the trail. She was _so_ going to regret this.

* * *

She knew she was nearly at the house when she started to smell muffins on the breeze. Her stomach rumbled loudly, as she was reminded just how long it had been since she'd sampled Emily's cooking. Hopefully a batch was already out of the oven.

Alex was just rehearsing an opening line, tramping doggedly through the well-flattened undergrowth, when someone burst from the trees. She screamed, voice cracking hysterically.

The tall boy that had appeared from thin air winced, throwing up his hands in surrender. "Whoa! Sorry! Sorry!"

Alex panted, clutching her chest as her heart thundered in her surprise. "What the hell, asshole?!" she scowled at the unfamiliar boy. Slowly, she put the large doe eyes and young, awkward smile together. Yeah – if she imagined him about a foot and a half shorter, skinny and long-haired – she was looking at; "Seth?"

His sheepish smile grew brilliant. "Yeah! You're Alex." He told her. She blinked at him. He grimaced again, "I, uh, I mean, I recognise you from the, um," he gestured to his temple. "It's nice to finally meet you, though!" he stuck his large hand out, and a little bemusedly, Alex shook it. His skin was just as hot as the others, grip just as tight.

"Nice to meet you too, Seth. I'm- I'm really sorry about your dad." Alex said awkwardly. She couldn't help but feel guilty. Seth probably suffered more than he needed to that day, because of her and Bella's stunt.

Seth's face drooped a little. "Thank you. Its been… well." He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck in a gesture so reminiscent of Jacob that she stared, caught off guard. He seemed uncomfortable in his own grief, and in the next moment, his beaming smile was back on his face. "The others are going to be happy to see you. I mean, they haven't been able to shut up about-"

"The others?" Alex interrupted him faintly. "Who's here?" She hadn't factored in seeing the whole Pack at once.

"Oh, um, everyone." He said weakly, giving her a worried look. She must have been wearing her hesitance on her face. "But don't worry! They'll all be happy to see you!"

Alex couldn't help but picture Jacob's scowl, Quil's hurt expression, Emily's I'm-not-mad-just-disappointed face. "Um…" she wasn't so sure about that. She bit her lip, wondering how hard it would be to excuse herself and go back home.

Seth's face drooped again. "Are you going to come for lunch?" he asked hopefully, looking up from through his lashes, and- _Jesus Christ!_ Alex could physically feel herself weaken under the sheer force of Seth's puppy dog eyes, his faint pout only adding to the sheer effect. "I'd like to get to know you properly, Alex." He said, more than a little sorrowfully.

Alex gaped at him. "Um," she repeated dumbly. "I, uh, I guess so." She said hopelessly.

Like the sudden reflection of sunlight on the water, Seth was smiling again, bright and sparkling. "Awesome!" he turned on his heel, "Emily's gonna make burgers, I was supposed to go look for Embry, because Sam's firing up the grill, but then I could hear you walking up. Your lungs are _shot_, by the way. You are like the noisiest breather I've ever heard. Do you smoke?" Alex walked on after Seth, his babbling monologue washing over here as they got closer to Emily's house.

"I don't…smoke." She responded distractedly, panic starting to rise in her as the undergrowth gave way to a gravel path.

"Well, that's good I guess. It's terrible for your health." Seth rambled on, turning to give her an approving look over his shoulder. "You got a lung disease or something?"

"Or something." Alex said dryly, stepping out of the trees after Seth, and shooting a glare at the back of his head. "The doctors just call it aspiration pneumonia, with the remnants of a little concussion. Tends to happen after being left to your own devices after drowning."

It came out louder and sharper than she had intended, and it made the sudden hush that had fallen over the surroundings more prominent. Alex felt her stomach drop, like it did at the top of a rollercoaster, and reluctantly stepped out from behind Seth's bulk to make uncomfortable eye contact with the members of the Pack that had been, up until a few moments ago, enjoying a sunny Saturday.

Jared and Paul were paused literally mid throw, Jared snatching the football they'd been tossing out of the air in an almost sheepish gesture. Her sister was looking at her over a magazine in her grip, an unreadable expression on her face. Kim was supporting a chubby little girl on her hip that Alex recognized as Claire Young, her mom, Rosemary Young, sitting next to Sue Clearwater on the wicker chairs on the porch, both of them frowning at her.

And Sam. Sam by the massive grill, staring at her through the smoke beginning to rise. Sam with dark eyes and a furrowed brow. Sam, who had left her on the stones, Sam, who had pushed life back into her lungs, Sam, who had been there for her, and who she hadn't realised she had missed so much.

"-honey, don't you think? Honey? Sam?"

And Emily.

Emily coming from the house with a stack of plastic plates in her grip, Emily with bare feet, Emily with wide eyes, Emily who gasped and dropped the plates. They went bouncing across the patio, and down the steps, and Sue and Rosemary sprung up and hurried to gather them. As if the spell was broken, Emily blinked, tearing her eyes away from Alex, and stooped alongside the other women to pick up her plates.

"Damn. I'm going to have to go clean these now. Sorry, girls. Thank you- thank you." Emily was mumbling to herself slightly, and Alex stepped towards her. The tableau sprung back to life, and Alex tried to pretend that there weren't eyes on her anymore. Emily straightened at her approach, watching her almost warily as she bent at the bottom of the steps to pick up the last plate.

"Do you want some help…um, washing?" Alex offered weakly. Emily gulped audibly, hands fluttering over the stack of plates, and nodded. Alex followed her inside. Despite knowing she was still very much within ear shot of all the wolves in the vicinity, she couldn't deny that having walls between them all made her relax slightly. Emily was already running the tap, and Alex eyed the hard set of the elder woman's shoulders with trepidation. _Right._ She'd practiced this. "Um, Emily. And Sam. I guess. I mean, really anyone who can hear and is listening, so I'm guessing most of you." She began, addressing Emily and the Pack at large, again thankful for the walls that hid her burning cheeks from view. _God, she hated apologising. And she was shit at it too._

"I just wanted to apologize. I'm really sorry for my behaviour these last few weeks. I'm sorry I said I didn't want to see you, and-"

"Oh, Alex!" Emily wailed suddenly, turning around in a splash of foamy water. Alex jumped, taking in Emily's dangerously crumpled face in horror. _Please don't cry, please don't cry, please- _"You shouldn't be apologizing! God! Do you have any idea how _worried we've been?!"_ Alex winced. Even the humans outside could hear that. "I- we- you should not have been left alone. You should have been taken _straight_ to hospital. I thought – and I did _not_ blame _you,"_ with a furious glare at the forest that gave Alex some clue as to who she did blame, "I thought you were done. With all of this." It was times like this, with her poise stripped away, with the illusion of wisdom gone, that Alex was reminded just how young Emily was.

_Shit._

Emily and Sam were only a few years older than Kitty and Paul. Too young to be shouldered with everything. And whilst Emily said she shouldn't be apologizing, Alex wanted to apologize again for making her worry. Because who was she kidding; whether it was wolfy-mojo, ancient magic, or just her own hopeless attachment – she had _missed them._ Missed them all. So much.

"And I couldn't talk to your parents about it, because what would I say? And you weren't speaking to Kitty either, so I thought, well, she must be. I thought you would press _charges!_" Emily wailed again. "You could have _died_."

"Yeah, that's what the doctor said." Alex tried to say cheerfully. "Luckily, I got to the hospital before I started having seizures." Emily let out a wordless cry, water going everywhere again. Alex winced at her misstep. "But don't worry! I didn't have seizures. I mean, I had one, but that was because of the fever. Not the head injury." Emily looked pained, and Alex shook her head at herself. "Sorry. I'm just- Look. You don't have to worry. About me. I'm here."

Emily sniffled, looking determinedly into the soapy water before her. Alex awkwardly stepped around her to grab a tea towel, and began to dry the plates Emily had washed. "I'm here." She repeated. Emily nodded weakly, and pulled off her bright pink gloves. This close, Alex could smell her shampoo and the lingering traces of muffins, and something that was just _Emily_, and when the elder woman pulled her in for a hug, she leant into her.

Emily kept her face buried in Alex's shoulder for a suspiciously long time, but when she pulled back, there were no tear marks on her cheeks, just a worried look to her eyes. "We missed you, chicken."

"Yeah." Alex bit at her lip. "I guess – I mean, yeah. I did too." She narrowed her eyes at the quiet laugh from outside that sounded suspiciously like Jared. Her stomach rumbled loudly, and Emily chuckled, the heavy atmosphere effectively broken.

"Come on then. Grab those plates for me. I need to get the soda." Emily clapped her hands, and Alex rolled her eyes.

"Already putting me to work." She muttered, making Emily grin again. "You're a slave driver." Emily flicked an imaginary whip, and Alex obediently picked up the stack of plates. Outside, the others were engaged in conversation, giving no indication as to how much they had heard, but Sue gave her a small smile, and Jared shot her a wink over Paul's shoulder.

Alex marched doggedly towards the grill, pretending her heart wasn't racing nervously as she approached Sam. Sam turned at her approach, and set down his tongs, squaring his shoulders in an awfully familiar stance. Alex set down the plates next to the grill with equal seriousness, and turned to face him. For a moment, they stared at each other, Alex willing her lungs – starting to struggle in the hot, dry air of the grill – to hold steady.

Then his face split into a wide smile, and he reached out to tug her into a tight embrace.

Alex blinked, unsure whether to be surprised or frightened as Sam gave her a gentle shake of affection. Slowly, she brought her arms up around him as far as she could reach, and squeezed him back. "It's good to see you, kiddo." He said gruffly, and set her back on her feet with a fierce ruffle of her hair.

"I'm not a kid." She muttered irritably, brushing her hair back down, unable to hide her own grin. He laughed quietly, turning back to the mountains of meat on the grill. Alex frowned, a sudden realisation making her spin in place. "Wait – where are-"

_"ALEXANDRA FAYE, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"_


	34. Playing On My Mind: Chapter 2

"ALEXANDRA FAYE, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

Alex had only a split second to take in her best friend's huge grin before Quil barrelled into her.

Her world wheeled around her as Quil literally swept her off her feet, all new strength and new joy as he danced around with her as if she was a doll. Automatically, she grasped at him, trying to wrap her arms around his frame. She couldn't now – he was simply too huge. He barked another happy laugh – still his own, but deeper and rougher – and set her back on her feet.

She stared at him, breathless.

Not only had he gotten tall – far taller than her now, but still short of most of the Pack – but he'd gotten _bigger_ too. Quil had always been brawny, and now he was _built_, arms rippling and barrel chested. He looked…dangerous.

But then he beamed at her, eyes crinkling and flashing his crooked bottom teeth, and it was just Quil. Just her idiot best friend.

And _god_, she had missed him.

This time, Alex ploughed into him, wrapping her arms around as much of him as she could, and laughing wheezily into his massive chest. "Jesus Christ! What'd you do? Swallow a tank?" Because she could, giddy on seeing him, giddy on his smile, she bit at his shoulder. _Nothin' but solid muscle._

It made him laugh, huge hands grabbing both of her shoulders to hold her up again like an irritating three-year-old. Quil patted her down, still grinning. "And what did you do, swallow a harmonica?" At her answering wheezy huff, he chuckled.

She grimaced, both at his words and the reminder of her absence. "I am sorry, Quil." She told him seriously.

He nodded, face growing sombre. "It's cool." He turned, angling his body enough so that she could see the other two figures that had emerged from the direction of the forest. Alex couldn't help the thrill of apprehension that raced down her spine, set her heart thundering in her chest, as she ducked her head to avoid Embry and Jacob's gazes. Quil eyed her strangely, sniffing quietly. "You okay?" he asked quietly.

_Right. Wolfy-senses._ Alex glared at him. "I'll give you a pass because you're new, but sniff out my _feelings_ again, and I'll staple you to a tree." It had taken _ages_ to get Paul and the others to stop.

Quil grinned. "I'd like to see you try." He clapped a hand down on her shoulder, heavily enough to ache, and she winced. Quil retracted his hand sheepishly. "Sorry, Alex. Um." He looked back over to their other friends. "We should talk." He said, sounding just as reluctant as she felt.

Alex dared to look quickly at the other two. Jacob had turned away from her, but she could see from his profile he was frowning. _Great_. Embry met her eyes, and raised his eyebrows pointedly. Then, he slung an arm around Jacob's neck and tugged him into the trees. Alex sighed, and squared her shoulders. Quil put his hand back on her shoulder, carefully this time, and they set off after their friends.

Sam jabbed a pair of tongs at them as they passed. "Hey, grub's nearly up." He warned. "And I won't be able to hold off the hungry mob forever."

Alex nodded. "We won't go far." Sam eyed her for another moment before he nodded. Quil and Alex marched on.

Embry had probably wanted to go out of earshot, which Alex could appreciate, even if her lungs could not. She kept her head down, doggedly tramping through the undergrowth as fast as she could, trying to keep up with Quil. Quil, however, was not as patient. As her breathing began to grow loud even to her own ears, he rounded on her, and reached for her.

Alex scowled at him, and side-stepped his grabby hands. "No." she told him, "I," she panted, "Can handle…handle it."

Quil rolled his eyes. "Let me _help_ you, dickhead."

"No!" She snapped, and stomped onwards, though she had no real idea where she was going. She couldn't exactly scent Embry out, nor follow the trace evidence of his passage like the others could. Still. She wasn't going to admit that-

Large hands grabbed her by her arms, as Quil lifted her bodily. She went stiff, just to spite him, unable to muster the breath to yell at him. "You're going the wrong way, idiot." He told her fondly, ignoring her evil glare, tucking her under his arm like a football. Knowing resistance was futile, Alex went slack again, letting herself dangle limply and watching the undergrowth pass them by dejectedly.

"I hate this." She grumbled after a moment, confident her voice would hold. "I hate not even being able to _walk_."

Quil hummed sympathetically, and ducked around a large patch of ferns. "Yeah, it must suck." With that, he dropped her, and she went sprawling on the ground. "Heh. Sorry." He said unapologetically. She rolled over to glare at him again, blowing a chunk of moss off her cheek.

"Quil," Embry's voice came from behind her, sounding equal parts chiding and amused. "C'mon, man. She's an invalid."

At that, Alex sat up, if only so she could twist to glare at Embry. Her friend was leaning against a giant redwood, smiling slightly. He looked thinner than last she saw him, tired, but there was a genuine joy in his eyes as he looked between her and Quil. "Hey, Alex." He said quietly.

_"I thought you were dead. We all did…" _

Embry's voice came back to her, his fearful eyes, his gentle grip, still mustering a smile for her, even as the world came down around them. Alex got up, and moved towards him. Embry eased off the tree and met her halfway, wrapping her in a tight hug that made her ribs groan. "Hi, Em." She whispered. "I'm sorry for being an idiot." She told him. She could only imagine him waking up to find her gone, Jacob and Leah still locked in combat, and the others out looking for the vampire.

"You'd think I'd be used to it," He grinned at her, "considering I am constantly surrounded by idiots."

"Hey!" Quil yelped indignantly.

"He's right, Quilly." Jacob's voice made Alex still for a moment. "Can't hate the truth." His voice was outwardly casual, but Alex – and the other two in the clearing – could tell it was false. Perks of being friends for years.

Alex schooled her expression, and turned to face Jacob. He was hovering on the other side of the clearing, obviously intent on keeping as much distance between them as possible. "Pretty sure you fall under the category of idiot too, Jacob." She said lightly.

Jacob met her eyes, and Alex tried not to react as the _thing_ she'd been ignoring flared to life with a burning intensity. Unbidden, the phantom sensation of his mouth on hers made her skin prickle with goose-bumps, the memory of his hands on her, the taste of his lips, the heat of his skin _pulling_ her out of her own. The Imprint clawed at her with sheer desire. It was all she could do to keep her feet still.

Jacob's jaw had tensed, and she watched as he slowly tucked his balled fists out of sight. She couldn't help but smirk slightly. At least she wasn't the only one effected. It made it a little easier to bear, if no less humiliating.

"You're probably right." Jacob said finally, still in that overly casual tone, but his eyes were dark and full of apology. Alex looked away.

Quil raised a hand into the air. "Uh, now that we're all here, I'd like to address the elephant in the, errr, forest." He finished lamely. Embry ran a hand tiredly over his face, sighing loudly. Alex couldn't help but grin, as Jacob shifted uncomfortably. "Well, I mean, I wouldn't actually _like_ to. But we-"

"_Have to_." The other three chorused in uncanny unison. They laughed awkwardly, looking between themselves and away again.

Quil flapped an impatient hand. "Yeah, whatever." He jabbed an accusatory finger at Embry. "Okay. To start off. _You._ First you date Alex, and then you Phase."

Embry rolled his eyes. "Yes, but Alex still technically knew before me. So really, you should be starting with _her."_ It was Alex's turn to be pointed at.

She frowned. "What?"

Quil crossed his arms. "Come on. No more secrets."

Alex looked between Jacob and Embry for support. "You guys are in each other's heads now. I didn't think there _were_ any more secrets."

"That is not the point, Alexandra." Quil said sternly. "All out. Everything." Alex blanched. There was _no_ way these idiots needed to know _everything_… she couldn't help but shoot Jacob a nervous look. He looked just as anxious. The fire in her chest burned for him.

"Well. Um." Alex cleared her throat. "How much do you know about the whole, um, Dream Walking thing?"

"Not much. I mean, I saw what its like, to have you in there. Creepy." Quil said, shuddering dramatically.

Alex rolled her eyes. "I couldn't help it!" She snapped. "Anyway. This is what happened;" she launched into the rundown of the months before the first Phase. It only occurred to her, as Embry and Jacob wandered closer to listen, that she hadn't even told them what it had been like. All those hours of exhaustion, of confusion. It had been hard, and she was only really realising just how horrible she had felt as she got it off her chest.

It felt like she had been talking for hours by the time she got up to Embry Phasing, when in reality it had only been a few minutes. "And so, I followed him into the forest." She said finally, nodding at Embry. "I was worried. And I didn't want him to be alone."

Embry let out a hiss of air. "I still can't believe you did that." He muttered, looking pained.

"You could have died." Jacob said quietly. Alex looked at him. His face was drawn, tired looking, as if he'd been just as exhausted by her tale as she was.

"And you did it again." Quil sounded more awestruck than concerned. "You went to yell at Jacob, and he nearly bit your head off."

"Twice." Alex couldn't help but add. Jacob winced, and Embry's face twisted at the reminder of the incident.

"Alex!" Quil had stopped looking impressed. "Do you have a death wish?" he griped, running a hand over his cropped hair.

Alex shrugged, and turned to the boys beside her. "That's me. You guys know everything else." She said. Alex looked at Jacob, still avoiding her eyes. "And, hey. Look. This Imprint thing..." Embry coughed awkwardly, and Jacob looked at the ground._ Everywhere they touched, fitting together like interlocking puzzle pieces, each breath shared, the hands on her body, her nails raking down his chest, fingers, skin, lips, tongues- _Alex swallowed thickly. There were _some_ things that didn't need to be said. "It's not a big deal. Okay?" She was speaking more to Jacob than anyone, and finally, _finally_ he looked up at her. She managed a smile. "We're friends." she told him, told them, resolutely.

"Okay." Jacob said quietly, Embry and Quil nodding along.

They were all quiet for a moment, and Alex took another moment to look at them. "Anyway. What's been happening here?" she asked. Even Quil, under his cheery veneer, looked tired. She would have thought that gaining an extra Pack member may have made things a little easier for them all.

Embry and Jacob exchanged a look, and Quil sighed. "That red-head. She keeps flitting around the territory." Embry said, shaking his head. "We've all been running doubles, because that bitch is looking for any crack to wiggle her way inside."

Alex felt a dull thrill of fear. _Victoria…_ She could still picture Bella's abject terror at the thought of the bloodsucker. "It's not going to end until she's dead, is it?" Alex hadn't ever heard of a vampire taking so much time on a hunt before._ A mate for a mate,_ Bella had said.

Quil slung an arm around her, in what was clearly meant to be a comforting gesture. "We'll get her." He said confidently. "Now that I'm on the team, she's got _no_ chance."

Embry jabbed him in the ribs, making Quil squeal and recoil. "Says the idiot who ran into a tree and gave himself a concussion." Alex burst into laughter at the visual.

Quil sniffed delicately. "I was just…building resistance." Alex grinned at her friend, catching Jacob's own smirk.

Embry snorted. "Like your fat head needs resistance training." Quil glared at Embry, and cracked his knuckles slowly. Alex took a giant step away from the pair of them. She could recognise the gleam in Quil's eyes, and wasn't looking to get caught up in a scuffle. Embry growled lightly, snapping his teeth. Quil grinned savagely, and with a battle cry, jumped at Embry, colliding with a loud thud, and going rolling to the ground.

Alex watched them wrestle fondly. It felt as though it had been a lifetime since it had just been _them_. A gentle nudge against her shoulder, and the answering heat skittering down her arm and over her skin told her Jacob had sidled up beside her. "I missed this." He said quietly, and when she looked up at him, he was wearing a familiar smile. Her stomach flipped.

"Yeah." She said quietly, nudging him back. "Me too." On the ground, Embry had pinned Quil, locking his long legs around Quil's torso and arms. For a moment, she thought about bringing up what Edward had told her. But as Jacob swayed into her again, that same delighted smile still lighting him up like the sun, she thought she might not have to. Everything was out in the open now, and they could all move on.

_Well…almost everything. _

Alex tore her eyes away from the curve of Jacob's lips, feeling her cheeks flame.

_She was so screwed. _


End file.
